“Oh, thank you, Mama! I do want to help.”
“That’s good. I won’t feel so bad about not helping, if you stay.”
“Just be very careful maneuvering those stairs,” her mother said. “Perhaps I should make sure you get down safely.”
“No, Mama, there’s no need for you to do that. I will make it down fine.”
She could tell her mother was concerned, but she appreciated that she only nodded and let her go. There was sometimes a fine line between knowing when to mother and when not to, and her mother was trying very hard to find that balance. Rebecca suddenly realized she’d have to do the same when Jenny became an adult.
* * *
At dinner that evening, the talk was all about the sleigh ride planned for the next evening and the impending arrival of the new boarders. They’d be moving in the next week and everyone seemed quite excited about having a full house once more. Ben would be glad for everyone’s sake, but he’d actually come to like their small group since Rebecca and Jenny had moved in and he hoped new people wouldn’t disrupt things as they were.
“I am glad they aren’t moving in this weekend,” Rebecca said quietly to him. “Mama looks tuckered out tonight from putting on all the final touches upstairs and getting the downstairs rooms ready for the new male boarders.”
Ben looked closely at Mrs. Heaton. She did look a bit fatigued but happy. “Perhaps she’s just tired from all she did today and after a good night’s sleep she’ll be rested tomorrow.”
“I hope so. I know she’s looking forward to having Michael, Violet, baby Marcus and Georgia over for dinner and the outing tomorrow evening, but I hope it isn’t all too much for her.”
“I think she’ll be fine. She looks very happy tonight, probably because she’s got it all done. And I think she’s excited about the new boarders. Pleased as I am with things like they are, I can see where the others might enjoy having more boarders around.”
“You aren’t looking forward to it?” Rebecca asked.
“Oh, I’m sure it’ll be nice to have others around. It’s just that I’ve enjoyed getting to know you and Jenny and I don’t feel a real need to have more people at the table. But I know everyone else does and I’ll adjust.” He grinned at her and then nodded in Jenny’s direction. “Your daughter looks sleepy this evening.”
Rebecca looked over to see that Jenny was having a hard time keeping her eyes open. “She’s had a busy day. Nothing could keep her from helping get the upstairs ready for Gretchen and Maida and the new boarders. I’m hoping her busy day has curbed some of the excitement for tomorrow so that she’ll be able to get a good night’s sleep.”
“I don’t think you need to worry about that.”
Rebecca chuckled. “I don’t think so. I hope she makes it through the rest of the meal.”
Maida brought dessert in and Ben chuckled as Jenny sat up straight in her chair and forked a piece of the buttermilk pie the maid put in front of her. “I think she will, but I don’t think she’ll go much past this dessert.”
“I’ll take her up soon as we finish here.”
“Oh, I forgot.” Ben took a folded piece of paper from his pocket. “Here is a list of schools that might have openings come next year. I thought you could give it to your friend tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Ben. She’s coming here for dinner tomorrow night—you could give it to her then.”
He shrugged and stuffed the paper back in his pocket. “All right. I’ll give it to her and I’ll be glad to answer any questions she has about who to contact to check about them after she goes back home.”
“That’s very nice of you, Ben.”
“That’s what I hear.” He smiled down at her. Always the nice guy—but never the sweetheart. Now, where did that thought come from? He wasn’t looking to be anyone’s love interest. But the way his chest tightened when Rebecca returned his smile had him wondering if he was being completely honest with himself.
As soon as everyone finished their dessert, Rebecca excused herself and her daughter. “I think it’s time I take Jenny upstairs and get her ready for bed, or she’s going to fall asleep at the table.”
“I think I must have worked her too hard,” Mrs. Heaton said.
“No, Granma, I had fun. But I am kind of sleepy.” Jenny yawned, needing no encouragement to go with Rebecca. “I can’t wait until tomorrow.”
“Well, the quicker we get you ready for bed, the faster tomorrow will be here.”
Ben watched as the two made it out of the room and headed for the stairs. He was sure Rebecca was glad she could get her daughter ready for bed herself again, but he felt a decided twinge of melancholy that she didn’t need him to help her up the stairs any longer.
* * *
New snow had fallen during the night and part of the day, making a perfect evening for sleighing. It was cold but not windy, and wearing their warmest coats, hats and muffs, and armed with plenty of blankets, the group would be fine.
Rebecca felt almost as excited as Jenny by the time Michael, Violet and Georgia arrived with baby Marcus. He’d be staying in with Gretchen and Maida, who were preparing a late supper for them instead of dinner. It was a good thing they’d all decided to go earlier in the evening, for excitement was running high at Heaton House.
Georgia looked almost the same as Rebecca remembered her. She was very pretty with dark brown hair and deep green eyes. Everyone was nice to her, including Ben, but there wasn’t much time to converse as the omnibus arrived to take them to Central Park only moments after they arrived.
The ride to the park was very jolly and excitement grew when they caught sight of the large sleigh Ben had reserved, ready and waiting for all fourteen of them. It looked kind of like an omnibus transformed into a sleigh.
Laughing, they all piled in and took seats around the sides of the sleigh. Ben had stayed close to Rebecca—probably because he feared she might slip and fall, but she couldn’t say she was upset at his watchfulness of her. Especially when Georgia was looking at him in an interested way.
But when Ben took a seat next to her, Rebecca felt herself relax. Jenny was on the other side of her, and her mother sat beside her granddaughter, wanting to see Jenny’s reaction to it all. Michael and Violet, along with Georgia, sat across from them and the others took the seats that were left.
Everyone had a good view of the snowy landscape and with lanterns lit all around the sleigh, they could easily see others out enjoying the evening. Central Park took on a totally different look at night after a snow. The moon was bright and trees and bushes stood out against the starlit night.
“Oh, it’s so pretty, Mama,” Jenny said, her eyes sparkling.
“It is, isn’t it?”
“Do you remember sleighing in Ashland, Becca?” Michael asked.
“I do, but it’s been such a long time. I remember Mama used to make cocoa in a pot, after Papa lit a fire, and we’d skate on the pond.” Rebecca hadn’t let herself go down memory lane much in the past few years. It’d been too heartrending, feeling that she could never go home again.
But now home was here and she felt as if she had a new beginning in all kinds of ways. She might never have what she longed for, but she had a life that was so very much better than it had been six months earlier. She sent up a silent prayer of thanksgiving that the Lord had delivered her out of the mess she’d made of her life, reunited her with her family and given her a new beginning—of sorts. Because of her own bad judgment, she’d made decisions that had made what she’d dreamed of back then impossible forever, but at least she was with her family again and she’d made good friends.
The driver put the sleigh in motion, his horses’ bells jingled and there was shared laughter as they took off. Rebecca forced her thoughts to the present to see Jenny’s eyes light up as she took in the scenery and felt the col
d air on her cheeks. It was invigorating and Rebecca gathered her daughter in a hug, happy that she was having such a good time.
“I’d forgotten how much fun this is,” Ben said. “We should try sledding soon, while we have the snow.”
“I think there are some sleds in the attic,” Rebecca’s mother said. “We can check.”
“Oh, could we go, Mama?” Jenny asked.
Ben’s gaze met Rebecca’s and she knew there was no way she’d refuse, looking into two pairs of eyes that begged her to say yes.
“I suppose we could go tomorrow afternoon after church and Sunday dinner, if the weather holds.”
Jenny rewarded her with a kiss on her cheek and Ben’s smile warmed her heart to almost melting. The expression in his eyes had her pulse rushing through her veins. She really needed to distance herself from this man, or her heart might be hurt worse than Jenny’s if anything happened to damage their growing friendship.
But how was she going to do that when she accepted every suggestion the man came up with for them to be together?
Chapter Eighteen
Ben enjoyed watching Jenny and Rebecca as the sleigh rounded each bend and a new view or others out for a ride came into vision. It was the perfect evening for it and he almost hated to see it come to a finish.
But as everything must end, so did the sleigh ride. They headed back to Heaton House, where supper was served almost immediately. It was a good thing, because the cold night air and all the excitement seemed to have made Jenny sleepy again. They’d all barely finished their supper of clam chowder, hot biscuits and cobbler before Rebecca excused herself to go put Jenny to bed.
But she promised she’d be down as soon as she did and so Ben joined the others in the parlor. Georgia seemed nice and he struck up a conversation with her. “Miss Marshall, Rebecca told me you’re thinking of moving here and she asked me to find out what I could about openings for teachers in the area.”
“How nice of her and of you, Mr. Roth.”
“Please, call me Ben. We don’t stand on formalities at Heaton House.”
“Well, then, Ben. But only if you call me Georgia.”
“Georgia it is. I told Rebecca I’d be glad to answer any questions you might have. She wasn’t sure if you’d want to teach the lower grades or high school. That would help narrow down the schools to check into.”
“I’ve been teaching first grade in Ashland, but I’m qualified to teach high school, also. I’ll take whatever I can find.”
He pulled the list he’d made out of his pocket and handed it to her. “This is what I have so far, but I’m sure there will be more openings after this term ends and I’ll be able to add a few names to that list.”
“That will be wonderful. Again, I thank you so much.”
“You’re quite welcome.”
Ben looked up just as Rebecca entered the room. She seemed a bit...perturbed? But what could she possibly be upset about? She appeared undecided, maybe, as if she wasn’t sure whom to join—him and her friend, or any of the others grouped in small clusters in the room. He smiled and motioned to her and for a moment he’d thought she wouldn’t join them, but then she smiled and headed their way.
“Rebecca, I’ve just been taking to Georgia about the list I made.”
“Thanks so much for enlisting Ben’s help for me, Rebecca. I’ll contact these people on Monday. I took several days off so that I could look into everything. If things work out, I hope to move here come summer.” She smiled at Rebecca. “I’ve told your mother I hope she has an extra room then.”
“You never know,” Ben said. “They seem to fill up fast around here.”
“That’s what Violet told me. I’d better make up my mind soon. Perhaps I could pay a deposit and ask her to keep one for me.” Georgia turned. “I’ll just go speak to her about it.”
With that she was off and Ben was relieved that he had a moment alone with Rebecca. “Do you think your mother will hold a room for her?”
“I’m sure she will. Mama and Georgia’s mother are old friends. You two seemed to be in deep conversation. You must have a lot in common.”
“I don’t know about that. We didn’t talk about anything but job openings. If you mean we’re both teachers, there is that, but not all teachers are alike, you know.” He grinned at her and was rewarded with a small smile.
She sounded almost...what? Jealous? No, of course not. What was he thinking? What was he wishing?
* * *
Rebecca didn’t know what had come over her, but when she entered the parlor and saw Ben speaking to Georgia, her friend listening to his every word, she’d felt something very akin to...jealousy. And she had no right to feel that way. No reason at all...except that she didn’t like seeing them together. She didn’t like it one bit.
O dear Lord, please help me. I think I’m falling in love with Ben and there’s no way he’d ever return my feelings. Not if he knew everything and—
“Rebecca? Are you all right?” Ben asked, his gaze full of concern.
“I am. Just woolgathering, I suppose.” Rebecca looked across the room to see her mother, Violet and Georgia coming their way.
“Rebecca, dear, I’m going to show Georgia and Violet the updates we’ve made upstairs. Do you want to come?”
Rebecca shook her head. “I’ll stay down here for now. I think one more trip up to my room will be about all I want to manage tonight.”
“That’s a wise decision,” her mother said. “We’ll be back down in a bit.”
Once they left the room, Ben turned to her. “Is your ankle giving you problems?”
“Not too much, just a twinge once in a while.”
“You know that if you need help, I’ll be glad to carry you up.”
Her heart turned warm and mushy at his offer. He couldn’t possibly know how badly she’d like to take him up on his offer. But being in his arms was the last thing she needed right now. “Thank you. But I’ll be fine. I’ll just take it easy. I must work to strengthen my ankle, you know.”
“I do. I just don’t want you to injure it again. Should we put off the sledding trip tomorrow?”
“I don’t think so. I’m sure it’ll be stronger after a good night’s sleep. And if it isn’t, I’ll just watch you and Jenny. I’d hate to disappoint her now she’s looking forward to it.”
“So would I. But we’ll see how you feel tomorrow.”
Gretchen came in then with hot chocolate and they settled down with the others to enjoy it. But Rebecca couldn’t stop thinking that she’d never been shown such concern by any other man. However, she dared not let herself read too much into it because Ben was just as kind and considerate to others.
He’d enlisted her to enroll at the Y and to be there to help his students. He’d helped her catch up with the others and he’d gone out of his way to get her mother a typewriter so Rebecca could practice and build up her speed here at home. Not to mention how kind and caring he’d been to carry her upstairs and down for days.
And he’d tried to find school openings for Georgia just as she’d asked him to. And then she felt upset when he gave the list to her friend just as she’d told him to? The truth was, she was just plain jealous seeing them together and wondering if they might be attracted to each other!
O dear Lord, please keep me from falling in love with Ben. My heart has been broken once...and...I don’t want to go through that kind of heartbreak ever again. Please help me.
* * *
Rebecca was still out of sorts with herself the next day as she and the others went to church. She’d tossed and turned most of the night, longing for things to be different and asking the Lord to help her accept that she’d never have what she wanted most.
But as she listened to the sermon taken from Isaiah, to fear not—God was there. She wa
s reminded, once again, that the Lord was with her, always had been. He’d seen her through her darkest hours. It was as if He were letting her know He’d heard her prayers. She sighed and began to relax. No matter what happened, He would see her through.
By the time the last hymn was sung and the closing prayer said, Rebecca felt at peace. And she remained that way, for Violet and Michael were taking Georgia out for Sunday dinner, and while she told herself once again that she had absolutely no reason to feel jealous of Georgia, she was a bit relieved that Georgia wouldn’t be joining them for Sunday dinner.
It was nice to have only the regular boarders at the table, especially with the new ones arriving the next day. When Rebecca’s mother asked Ben to say the blessing before the meal, he asked that they all try to help the new boarders fit in and that together they would all be a blessing to her mother, just as she was to her boarders.
Rebecca felt the sting of tears at the back of her eyes when she saw her mother wipe her eyes.
Because it would be the last outing before new boarders joined them, they all went sledding that afternoon. Rebecca decided not to chance twisting her ankle again and chose to sit with her mother and watch as Ben and Jenny slid together.
The laughter they shared rang in the cold crisp air and she smiled, knowing her daughter was having a great time.
“Ben is such a good man, isn’t he?” her mother asked.
“Yes, he is.”
“You know, dear, the Lord has a plan for your life. And when the time comes that you fall in love again, I hope it is with someone like Ben.”
Rebecca’s heart did a twist and dive at her mother’s words. Did she have any idea that Rebecca was already wrestling with her feelings for Ben? “Oh, Mama, what man—”
“The man the Lord brings into your life will love you for who you are, not for your past, but for your future, Rebecca. I realize it will take a special man to convince you of that. But I know the Lord has a plan in mind for you. Just trust that He’ll let you know what it is—in His time.
“I know He does. But I’m not sure His plan for me includes my falling in love. If so, I think He may have to hit me over the head with something to make me realize it.”
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