by London Casey
I was an idiot for instantly falling for him right then, but he was cool. He was bad. He didn’t care. He spoke his mind and did what he wanted. He was everything wrong and I was everything right.
I kept staring at myself in the mirror.
I caught myself smiling.
He was coming back to town... Slade was coming back...
Walker had a key to my apartment but not to the deadbolt. He hated when he could open one lock and not the other.
I heard him unlock the door and then turn the handle and shake the door. His fist then pounded on the door and he growled my name.
I walked to the door with a cup of coffee and opened the deadbolt.
He burst into the apartment, his tie loose, eyes wide. “What are you doing?”
“I’m having coffee,” I said. “Would you like some?”
Walker looked around.
His nostrils flared as though he was trying to sniff something. Without another word, he walked right by me and went to my bedroom. I walked after him, putting my coffee down on the table.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
Did I really need to ask?
He was looking for Slade. That’s exactly what it was. Figuring that since the Knight brothers were in town for the death of their father that instantly put Slade back in my bed. I knew for a fact that there were a few times Slade had passed through town since he and his brothers split. This time, however, he had been in for a couple days and would stay for a couple more.
I couldn’t just let it go.
I had to see him.
Especially since his father died. I couldn’t imagine who would actually show up to the funeral for Mr. Knight, but those who did would be walking along, shaking hands with Slade and his brothers, perhaps telling them they were sorry for their loss. That would only cause the anger to build up in Slade because there was nothing to be sorry for other than what Mr. Knight did to his family. Or worse yet, those people might even offer some attempt at kindness by saying at least their parents were together in heaven. I knew that would send Slade over the edge. First off, he didn’t believe in heaven, hell, or any of that. Second, if those places did exist, then Slade would never want his mother and father reunited in any way possible.
“Olivia?” Walker’s voice boomed from the bedroom. “Get in here.”
Now I started to get nervous. I hadn’t done anything wrong but I feared Walker would make something up in his mind and run with it. Then he’d drag my brother into it and my brother had a police force behind him. I was certain every officer had been properly informed of the Knight brothers and they were all cracking their knuckles, ready to go after Slade for any kind of reason at all.
I walked to the bedroom and Walker stood in the middle of the floor. “What the hell is this?” he asked.
“What?”
“This.” He walked to a black dress I had hung up outside my closet.
Shit.
“A dress.”
“Don’t be a smart ass,” he growled.
“I should pay my respects.”
“Like hell. Send a card. I’ll send flowers. From the both of us.”
“Walker, you don’t get it...”
Walker turned and stepped toward me. He had a finger pointed at me, showing me his teeth. He was poised for an attack, with me as his prey.
“Don’t give me that shit,” he said. “You want to run off to a funeral? Why? I think we know enough of his father to know this isn’t tragic.”
“It matters to me.”
“Owen figured that,” Walker said. “As did I. Pack a bag, we’re leaving.”
“What?”
“You heard me.” Walker stepped toward me. He touched my arms, suddenly gentle. “Listen, you don’t need that in your life. There’s going to be nothing but problems with those guys back in town. Owen has his hands full already because of it. So you and I are going to escape to my cabin for a couple days. I’m taking a break like you asked me to do.”
“I asked you months ago,” I said. “This is all because...”
“Be quiet,” Walker said. “It doesn’t matter. Okay? I’m doing this now. For you. For us. I have a conference call and then I’ll be back. One hour. Have a bag packed and ready to go. We need this, Olivia. You and I together.”
Walker leaned in and kissed my cheek. Thankfully he didn’t go for my lips or else that would imply something more physical. The last time he wanted to fool around I lied and said I had my period. That always made him run away. I knew I couldn’t use that excuse again for another couple weeks.
There was no more talk about anything and Walker left. I grabbed a bag and quickly threw some clothes into it. My heart raced and ached the entire time as I did so. I kept glancing at the dress. It took me all of ten minutes to pack a bag. I still had over forty minutes until Walker would return. The cemetery was only five minutes away.
I hurried and grabbed the dress.
I got changed and checked myself in the mirror.
My face was flushed and there was no stopping it.
That’s just what the possibility of seeing Slade again did to me.
There was a back dirt road that got me into the cemetery. I didn’t want to just pull in through the gates, get spotted, and end up in trouble. So I parked at a decent enough distance and climbed out of my car. I looked off to the horizon and saw the small gathering around the casket. Hardly any people, which wasn’t all that of a surprise.
I quickly recognized Caine in one his flannels. He was built like a lumberjack and looked to match. He could easily swing a heavy axe over a hockey stick but he liked to fight and probably made a lot more money with hockey. He stood with his arms folded. They were like tree trunks.
Someone walked up to Caine. It was Roman. Dressed sort of fancy, looking pissed off. I knew he took the brunt of Mr. Knight’s physical abuse. It shocked me that he was even there. He grabbed Caine’s shoulder and then nodded, looking right at me. That stopped me dead in my tracks as I saw two of the three Knight brothers staring at me.
The question was... where was Slade?
Before I could even attempt a guess, I heard the growl of a motorcycle engine. I started to walk forward again and then saw him.
Cruising up the dirt path, dust kicking up behind him. The motorcycle was loud and obnoxious. Just hearing it brought back memories that made my cheeks blush. I forced myself to keep moving forward. I was there to pay respects to Slade and his brothers. Not to Mr. Knight. Screw that guy. He made a comment about my body once and it made me feel so cold and gross.
Slade stopped his ride and climbed off. He took his helmet off and ran a hand through his hair. He reached for a smoke and then looked at me. We were far apart but our eyes locked tight. It was like time came to a complete halt. I was pretty sure my right foot was off the ground as I was midstep.
Slowly, Slade put the smoke to his lips. He opened his leather jacket and took out a lighter. Caine and Roman had turned their attentions to their younger brother and went to him. A flicker of flame and Slade lit his smoke. He took a drag, his eyes never leaving mine. By that point it was pretty obvious this wasn’t going to work out so well. Somehow in my mind I had hoped to just walk up there, say hello, pay my respects, and then leave.
Time was counting down until Walker would be at my apartment.
I slowly lifted my right hand.
Are you going to wave?
I got my hand halfway up and then a hand appeared, grabbing my hand.
I turned and was faced with Walker.
I let out a gasp.
“What the hell are you trying to do?”
“I told you, I wanted to say goodbye.”
“Yeah, you say goodbye,” Walker said. “To all this shit. I’ve got your bag in my car. Let’s fucking move. Don’t make me make a fucking scene here.”
I moved forward, following Walker.
I wanted to look back so bad but knew better.
It was better off that way.
; Looking at Slade was like looking at danger. He would take my heart again and he would crush it again.
I left with Walker, knowing that by the time I came back to town, Slade would be gone.
This time... it would be forever.
(SLADE)
Maybe I’d be late for my own funeral someday, but today I was late for my father’s. Like it really fucking mattered. All I wanted to do was get him in the ground and get the lawyer moving on whatever came next. Toss some money toward medical bills. Pay off the old man’s debt. Then put the house up for sale or just burn it down. Roman wanted to give the place away to a family in need. What-the-fuck-ever. I just wanted to be done with it all.
I didn’t mean to be late.
I ended up at the house to meet my brothers there. I went to the shed and found the old dirt bike just sitting there. The memories washed over me and I asked if Caine and Roman would give me some time alone. They left and I took some tools out, along with the dirt bike, and started to get to work. I fucked around with the motor and got lost in time. When I snapped out of my trance I had to wipe my hands and run to my motorcycle. I didn’t even have time for a smoke before I had to hit the road.
When I got to the cemetery I barreled up the dirt road, kicking rock and dust up behind me. Ma used to tell us to be respectful in a cemetery because the dead were resting. I loved Ma so much, but fuck that noise. They were all dead. Most just bones by the time my motor was howling past their old stones.
I stopped my ride and climbed off. I didn’t even want to see the casket. So I looked forward and that’s when shit got way too real.
Olivia.
My girl.
My Liv.
She was standing in a black dress that was too fucking unfair to wear at funeral because I wanted to rip it off her goddamn body. Just like the old days and all those old wild feelings. The first woman that broke through the barrier of my heart. The girl who wanted me to take her for the first time. The girl I broke open, the girl who unleashed a little wild side with me. We’d drink and smoke, hide out down by the pond, and the things I’d do to her... the places I tasted with my tongue... the parts I touched with my eager hands... the sounds she made that carried into nights that were so fucking hot and romantic that they forever left my heart like stone.
I managed to get a cigarette between my lips and light it.
Goddamn, I needed it.
We were too far apart but I could still see the way her hips curved as I remembered. Those beautiful tits that were just so naturally full all the time, pressing against the top of the dress. It was impossible for Liv not to look sultry and wild, ever. She could wrap her ass up in ten sweatshirts, not wash her hair for a week, and she could just look at me and my cock would stand tall, ready for battle.
That’s exactly what started to happen too.
My dick started to come to life, twitching and filling.
Right there in the goddamn cemetery.
Then again, what did it matter? There was a tree about fifty feet to my left where I had pinned Liv against one night and had two fingers inside her so deep, twisting wildly, making her cry out until she came.
I took a drag of my smoke and Liv started to lift her hand to wave. Then someone was right there, grabbing her hand, spinning her around. Ten seconds later she was walking away, out of my life.
Just like the fucking first time... she didn’t even bother to look back.
“Whoa, bro,” Caine said. “You okay?”
I took another drag. “Fucking great. What was that about?”
“I don’t know,” Roman said. “Probably one of her brother’s goons to keep your hands off her.”
“I’m not going anywhere near that again,” I said, knowing damn well that in the depths of my heart it was a stone cold fucking lie.
I tossed my smoke to the ground and turned to face the casket.
Caine stepped on the smoke and put it out.
“Let’s do this,” I said. “Get him in the ground and get out of here.”
“Brother,” Caine said. “Give it a second here. Maybe a little respect.”
I looked at Caine. I was eye level with him. Calling me the little Knight was no use. If it came down to a fight between myself, Caine, and Roman, it would end with the three of us knocking each other out.
“Fuck yourself,” I said to Caine. “Look at the scars on my back and talk to me about respect.”
“He’s right,” Roman said. “Let’s dump the bastard in the hole and walk away.”
“Fuck,” Caine said.
I looked at the priest standing at the top of the casket. His eyes were wide. Father Monte had watched the three of us grow up. Ma used to make us go to church every Sunday right up until she lost her faith, which was right around the time I started to remember the old man beating on her. I guess she felt all that time spent praying to the man upstairs wasn’t being fairly returned. Not that I could blame her.
“Sorry, Father,” I said with a smile. “You know how it gets when the Knight brothers roll into town.”
Father Monte blessed himself. “God help us all.”
I put a fist to my father’s casket and curled my lip. “No, Father, not even God could save the three us at this point. Now let’s get this show on the road.”
Behind me I heard Roman and Caine laughing.
There were six other people there, just old friends in town.
I grabbed for a fresh cigarette and stood there, listening to the biblical bullshit before the old man was put into the ground.
I tossed the butt of my smoke into the hole and walked away. I looked to my left to the spot where I had seen Liv.
I thought about the guy that grabbed her hand.
I could only hope she was happy...
(OLIVIA)
Walker came home drunk.
He ripped his tie and threw it to the floor. Next he unbuttoned his shirt, his eyes full of lust, needing a fuck. I wasn’t in the mood to give any fucks to anyone.
His hands grabbed for my breasts, cupping them through my shirt. It was after midnight and I had no bra on. His hands slid around me and he pulled me close.
“Fuck, baby,” he whispered. “Let me get that kitty tonight.”
I cringed.
How the hell did he think referring to my vagina as a kitty made it sexy?
I managed to get my hands between us and I started to push him away.
He stunk of vodka, cherry, and had glitter on his neck.
“You were at a strip club,” I said.
“Celebrating a deal,” Walker said. “Just grabbed myself an investment that’s going to make me about ten million in the first three years.” His hands lunged for my ass and he pulled me to him. “Fuck, baby, I’m going to kill you tonight.”
Again... not sexy.
“Take it easy,” I said and pushed him away.
Walker wasn’t done.
He finished unbuttoning his shirt and took it off. I wasn’t going to lie to anyone, including myself. Walker had a nice body. He was trim and cut, lines everywhere. He could leave his shirt open, take a picture, and then sell it. But he wasn’t built. He wasn’t built to be strong, you know? Just built to look good.
He wasn’t... someone else.
Walker took his shirt off and opened his pants. “Come here, baby. They got it all started, now you’re going to finish me off.”
His right hand shot out and grabbed the bottom of my shirt. I was wearing nothing but panties and a long t-shirt. He lifted the shirt and slid his hand between my legs. I felt him touch me and I jumped. To him, that meant I liked it. I really didn’t like it. I put my hands to his wrist and pushed him away.
The truth was that the last two weeks he’d been so busy we hadn’t any time together. The last time we were together was the first night he took me away from the funeral. We got to his cabin and I went for the liquor. No ice. Just a bottle. I ended up getting drunk and was on my hand and knees, naked, full of regret, full of Walker. I hat
ed myself for that night.
We hadn’t touched each other since, until now.
He moved at me again and I grabbed the top of his pants.
“That’s a good girl,” he said. “Finish me off right now.”
“Not inside me,” I whispered. “I can’t.”
“What do you mean you can’t? Don’t give me that period shit again. I don’t give a fuck either way. I’m drunk. I want that kitty.”
I shivered.
I eased my hand down the front of his pants and felt him. My hand wasn’t big and I was able to grab maybe too much of him, if you get the hint. Nothing like the only other person I had ever been with.
I squeezed and jerked at him. “Just like this, okay?”
“No,” he growled. “I make the fucking rules and you fucking listen.”
Walker pushed me against the table. His hand pressed harder between my legs.
My mind scrambled on how to escape this. My excuses were running thin. There was just so much happening in my life at once. Seeing Slade still clung in my mind. I hated that I didn’t get a chance to talk to him. Owen had been up my ass since then, trying to check on me and make sure I was still in love with Walker. Something was wrong with Mom, too. Something that Owen refused to believe. And then Walker...
“Come on,” he yelled. “I’m going to come soon.”
How romantic.
“I can’t!” I yelled. “I just can’t!”
I stopped jerking him when he grabbed my face. His fingers dug into my cheeks and jaw.
“Why?” he asked.
Goddammit, I never wanted to fear a man, but I did. I feared Walker. I feared him because I had nobody to go to. If I ran to Owen, my own flesh and blood, he’d simply mediate me and Walker getting back together.
“I...”
“You better have a good fucking reason,” Walker said. “You’re not allowed to say no to me. Now turn around.”
“No,” I said.
I saw the rage spread across Walker’s face.
I needed something.
Right now.
Hurry, Olivia, right now.