The California Club: LoveTravel Series - USA

by Belinda Jones

  I'm next. Surreptitiously I wipe my clammy palm in anticipation of the handshake but he switches direction and moves towards Elise. Oh no! I've been deliberately overlooked. Why?

  'Elise?' He stands before her.

  'However did you guess?' she sneers, giving him a challenging look.

  'Why, Helen told me, of course. This isn't Amateur Psychic Hour.'

  Hah! She chews her lip like a petulant teenager.

  'Anyway,' he continues. 'It's always nice to have a cynic to convert, so welcome.'

  Before Elise can froth a reply he addresses a denim knee, 'Is that Elliot under there?'

  Elliot struggles to free his arm, quickly shaking off the pins and needles before his hand meets Alex's.

  'Hi!'

  'I guess you're wondering what you've got yourself into?' Alex raises a knowing eyebrow.

  Presumably he's referring to The California Club but I allow myself to think he's picking up on some kind of reservation Elliot may have about Elise.

  'I can handle it!' Elliot struts his macho stuff.

  Alex smiles and says, 'It's you who's into roller-coaster rides, right?'

  'Yeah,' Elliot grins.

  ‘Well, you're going to get one!'

  'Sounds good to me!'

  I wouldn't be so thrilled if Alex said that to me, it sounds vaguely threatening. But why would The California Club want to rattle our cages? We've come here for pleasure, we made that quite clear at Passport Control.

  'Lara!' he turns suddenly to face me.

  Oh thank god!

  He leans close.

  'What's it going to be with you?' He studies me, boring into my soul.

  I try to project flair, confidence and success but suspect he can see through to my confusion, fears and lonely wee heart.

  'I guess we'll have to wait and see.'

  Oh no! I'm an unknown quantity. I want to be fine, more than fine! Not wait and see! I demand a recount! You've got to give me more than that!

  Seemingly sensing my needs he adds, 'But I suspect it may be your turn.'

  My turn for what? Am I supposed to know what he means? My turn to be with Elliot? My turn for love? My turn to put the rubbish out? What?!

  Alex strolls back over to the window and takes a more casual position to address us now, resting on the arm of a dark violet chair. 'My second question is: Are you really ready to get what you really want?'

  Zoë jolts a 'Yes!' out of me. The best he can hope for from Sasha and Elliot is a tentative nod. As for Elise, he doesn't know how lucky he is that she's making no response at all.

  'Okay. Last night each of you wrote a wish on a piece of paper. Today we're going to take the first step to making those wishes come true.'

  'Oh great!' Elise rolls her eyes.

  'On behalf of The California Club I'm going to make you an offer. It's entirely up to you as a group whether or not you take it—'

  'We'll take it!' blurts Zoë.

  Elliot urges Zoë to cool her jets until we've heard the whole proposition.

  'Now this isn't a one-tap-of-the-wand thing. Ninety per cent of the work will come from you,' Alex informs us.

  My heart sinks. There's always a catch, isn't there? Always the word 'work' running alongside any chance of dreams being fulfilled. I'm off the idea already. Let's just have a holiday and have done with it.

  'So my third question is this: Would you be prepared to give up one week of your stay in California to make your wish come true?'

  Wary silence. Even Zoë is mute, not wanting to be selfish and put her desires ahead of the group.

  'What exactly do you mean by that?' I query.

  'The California Club has arranged for each of you to spend seven days in pursuit of your wish.' Again Zoë flutters with excitement. But she's the only one.

  'Because of the variety and nature of your wishes, each of you will be sent to separate locations.'

  There's a muttering of solidarity: no way – we're sticking together.

  'You'd send us all to different places?' Zoë hopes she's misheard.

  'Yes,' Alex confirms. 'Well, all, that is, except for Lara, but I'll come to why later.'

  What? Me? What have I done now?

  'Why can't we stay together?' Zoë pouts.

  'Because you all want different things.'

  'Can I change my wish?' Elise asks.

  Alex shakes his head. 'We go with what you wrote last night.'

  'Then forget it!' she huffs.

  Zoë looks pleadingly at her.

  'I'm sorry but my wish is crap.'

  'And yet it was your choice. Your wish.' Alex reminds her.

  ‘Yeah but I didn't know it was going to lead to this.'

  'None of us know where things will lead in life but it's an important lesson – your thoughts and words are powerful. Choose them wisely.'

  Elise wrestles herself free from the chair and turns on the group. 'Are you just going to sit around and listen to this crap?'

  'Let's at least hear the thing out – we're not committing to anything,' Elliot reasons.

  Oooh goody – does that include each other?

  Elise groans and goes to stomp off but Elliot tugs her back on to his lap, winding himself in the process.

  'Why does it have to be for a whole week?' Elliot asks, trying to position Elise so she's not compressing any vital organs. 'Couldn't we just do it for one or two days? I don't know about the rest of the wishes but mine could easily come true in an afternoon.'

  There's a murmur of assent.

  I could certainly have quality time with everyone of my friends in a day – breakfast with Sasha, lunch with Zoë, tea with Helen and dinner with Elliot. And maybe a bit of the night-time for good measure. Just through to sunrise or something. Elise is no friend of mine so she doesn't count. Sorted!

  Alex shakes his head. 'Unfortunately there is a process in making these wishes come true. If you do not experience the process, the wish itself will be invalid.'

  'What are you proposing?' I dare to ask.

  'Yeah?' the others chorus.

  'I'm afraid I am not able to disclose the details until you have committed to the seven days.'

  'You want us to say yes to giving up a week of our holiday without knowing where we're going or what we're doing?' Elliot talks it back to him in his most unconvinced tone.

  'There is a very special incentive at the end of all this' Helen prompts Alex: sensing we need a carrot and fast. 'Yesterday you all visited the Hotel Del Coronado, yes?'

  'Yes.'

  'And you liked it?'

  'Gorgeous/beautiful/magical!' Our adjectives overlap. ‘Well,' he smiles, confidently. 'If you all complete your week, you will earn yourselves five nights' complimentary stay.'

  Now that's tempting.

  'Helen's afternoon teas!' Sasha's eyes light up.

  'Sunset martinis!’ I cheer.

  ‘Watching the Navy SEALS training,' Zoë gurgles.

  ‘We could make our own mini movie!’ Elliot cheers. ‘I’ve got this great new camcorder…’

  'All for free?' Elise speaks.

  A-ha. Alex has just discovered the way to her heart.

  ‘So we’d be up $300 a night there?' she asks.

  ‘Well, we’d be going a few steps beyond a standard room …' Helen can't keep it in any longer: 'We're offering you the Marilyn Monroe beach house!'

  Oh my god! I gasp. That's some carrot!

  Zoë has now become a human firework of excitement and instantly starts campaigning: 'So, in a way, we'd be earning, what? $15,000-worth of prize for seven days work!'

  'Still. Seven days,' Elliot's not convinced.

  Helen steps in. 'I realize you guys are just out here for two weeks and to spend half of it on some crazy scheme seems a bit excessive but trust me, it'll be one of the best things to ever happen to you.'

  We all stop flapping to listen to Helen.

  'California will always be here – the beaches, the palm trees, the convertibles, the
babes – but you might never get this chance again. I'm not going to force you, but I will get down on my knees and beg you to do this because I know how happy it can make each and every one of you.' Her voice quavers with genuine emotion.

  We take a moment to mull over her words. Her insistence seems to be born out of real concern for our lives. Maybe we're in a bigger mess than we thought. I look at Sasha. She's definitely on the brink. If not this, what? What will save her? Zoë's so wound up, she's likely to explode any minute. Maybe this could switch her to implode, which would be considerably less messy. Elise. Well, that girl has issues. Elliot. He does look tired. A bit pallid. Maybe he needs a dose of greenery. And what about me? I came here to escape the biggest upheaval in my life, hoping to regain some feelings of security, and yet here I am being presented with more uncertainty. Maybe that's the point. Maybe I'm supposed to have a practice run here so when I get back, things won't seem so daunting. All the same …

  'Why don't you take a moment to decide?' Alex says, as he escorts Helen through to the lobby, leaving us to debate…

  ‘Come on you guys, it's the chance of a lifetime.' Zoë remains the constant positive.

  'For you, maybe,' Elise mutters.

  'Zoë, perhaps you'd like to get us some drinks?' I suggest. Her peppiness is only making Elise more cantankerous.

  Zoë obliges but Elise strops off regardless. Elliot follows, leaving Sasha and me alone.

  She turns to me. 'So, what do you think?'

  There's a glimmer of hope in her eyes. I can't risk extinguishing that.

  'Maybe it's the chance we've been waiting for?' Do I sound convincing enough?

  Sasha holds her hands up to her face, making a little teepee over her nose, then takes a breath. 'We've got to do this, haven't we?'

  'What have we got to lose?' I'm still not sure.

  'I think we need to want this.' Sasha gives me a serious look.

  I look back at her. She's right. If we're going to go for it, we have to be wholehearted.

  'Of course, if Elise doesn't agree in the first place, none of us get to try,' Sasha notes.

  Suddenly I want this more than anything. If she's got the power to take it away from me, I want it all the more.

  'I'm in,' I tell her.

  Sasha inhales, looking both terrified and excited, a new determination forming in her eyes. 'Me too!'

  I grin and hug her, closing my eyes as I press my cheek to her bony shoulder and whisper, 'I'm so proud of you!'

  'Don't – I'll cry!' Sasha laughs.

  'God – imagine staying at Marilyn's Beach House!' My mind leaps ahead.

  ‘Everyone!' The others have returned and Helen reconvenes the meeting before I can get too carried away. 'Do you have a verdict?'

  All eyes are on Elise. She knows she holds the casting vote and she's milking it for all it's worth.

  'Well?'

  I cross my fingers, Sasha gnaws a nail, Zoë scrunches her eyes closed. Nothing. Elliot nudges Elise into making a response. She makes a big show of crumpling her brow like she's in pain then concedes, 'All right …' with a look of supreme martyrdom.

  We all charge across the room and pile on top of her in a noisy, boisterous hug. Not a scene I visualized happening in this lifetime.

  'That's wonderful,' Alex claps his hands together. 'I just have to go back to base and confirm the arrangements and then we can meet again at about 4pm.'

  'Is that when you'll tell us where we're going?' Zoë asks.

  'That's right,' Alex confirms.

  'Oh my god!' Zoë bounces with glee.

  'Well, enjoy your afternoon. I know Helen has got something special planned…’

  'Am I okay in this?' I nudge Helen and tug at yesterday's travelling outfit 'Only my suitcase hasn't arrived yet.’

  She gives me a sympathetic smile. 'Don't worry, where we're going you won't need clothes.'

  As she marches ahead towards the door, the rest of us exchange concerned looks. No clothes? Oh god! Not only is Helen part of a cult – turns out it's a nudist cult!

  Elliot leans close and whispers: 'Gives a whole new meaning to the term "Moonies", doesn't it?’

  Chapter 10

  ‘You can go naked if you prefer,' Helen chuckles when Elliot tells her what we were expecting. 'I just meant you didn't need any of your clothes: we supply every thing here.'

  We're at La Jolla Shores. About to brave the waves. In wetsuits. I feel somewhat daunted.

  'Helen, are you sure about this?' I ask, kneading the dense black foam.

  'Yes, yes – put it on. I've worked out the sizes, they should be a good fit.'

  Zoë's already in hers, zipper straining over her cleavage like she's doing a rubber fetish shoot for Playboy, Sasha is sleek Catwoman, Elise is refusing to join in and Elliot is falling about laughing at himself – 'I look like the stick of licorice in a Sherbet Dib-dab!'

  In actual fact he looks divine. His tousled hair and lean physique suits the surfer look. He's even got the right stance. I remember him saying he used to go to Newquay as a kid, before he got pale and into computers.

  With a helpful hoik from Helen I manage to squirm into mine. It feels tight and restrictive yet bendy and pliant. Strange. Part of me wants to claw it off, but as I begin to calm down from the effort of getting it on, I adjust to the sensation of having a second coarser skin and reach out to shake Elliot's hand, 'Hi, Licorice Man? I'm Lara – the Human Tire!'

  Elise is not amused. 'I don't know why we couldn't just stay by the hotel pool.'

  ‘There's no better cure for jet lag than surfing,' Helen insists. 'You'll feel

  totally revitalized after, I promise.'

  'She's right,' Elliot agrees. 'In fact I think I'm going to brave it in my shorts – I want to feel the water on my skin …'

  I experience a flutter of lust as I watch him peel himself free of the wetsuit – it's all a bit slo-mo after-shave ad for my delicate sensibilities.

  'What color rash guard do you want?' Helen nudges me, emptying a bag of stretchy surf T-shirts on the sand. 'You're supposed to wear them under your wetsuit but if you put them on top I'll be able to keep track of you.'

  Zoë nabs the pink, Sasha green, Elliot blue, Helen opts for yellow and hands me the red. Red for emergency. Red for STOP!

  ‘Helen, I don't know if I can,' I bleat, noticing a surfer lose his footing and get whisked into a foamy froth out at sea. It's all too easy for me to imagine the pounding-drumming-glugging pressure as he claws his way up to the surface, gasping for air.

  'You can stay with me:' Elise offers. 'I'm not going in.'

  Suddenly I'm hurdling the waves like a Baywatch babe. What's a little light drowning compared to death by Elise?

  'Okay,' Helen commands our attention. 'Before we get in the water there's some basic stuff you should know. I could tell you myself but instead I want you to meet the woman who taught me and totally upgraded my life – Isabelle Tihanyi, she's co-owner of—‘

  ‘The California Club?' Zoë jumps in.

  'Actually no, she's the woman who started Surf Divas – the world's first surf school for women.’

  'Um, Helen.' Elliot tugs at her elbow with a wry look. 'There's something I've been meaning to tell you… ‘

  ‘That's fine,' Helen assures him. They make allowances – Guys on the Side, they call it. Besides, you're so pretty all we need is pop a couple of clams in your suit,' she teases, grabbing his pecs.

  'Get off!' he laughs, batting her away.

  'She's over in the parking lot so I'm just going to help her with her gear, back in a mo.'

  'Helen!' I call after her.

  'What?' She turns back.

  ‘Are we allowed to tell each other our wishes yet?'

  Helen grins broadly. 'I was wondering when you'd get to that. Go ahead – you've made your commitment. Spill!'

  We huddle up.

  Zoë jumps straight in with her wish: 'I want to swap lives with a Hollywood actress!'

  No surprises th
ere. Not sure how The California Club can pull that one off without kidnapping some Oscar contender, but it's a good wish with high glamour potential. Nicely played.

  Zoë tags Sasha.

  'I want to find the one place in California where looks don't count! Oh, it makes me sound so vain!' Sasha cringes.

  'No, it doesn't,' we assure her, not envying her wish. She could easily end up in Death Valley with a load of sun-parched skulls, or maybe trampling grapes in the Napa Valley. Hmmm, all that aromatic wine, maybe not such a bad option.

  'Elliot?' I prompt.

  'Get me to a theme park!'

  ‘Reassuringly predictable.’

  'I don't really know how they're going to string that out into a week-long activity,' he frowns. 'I'll just end up with massive osteopath bills from all jiggering rollercoaster rides and probably get done for stalking Cinderella.’

  'Were those your exact words?' Elise checks the small print. ‘Get me to a theme park?’

  'More or less. I did say something about it being the biggest theme park, because I had Magic Mountain in mind, but really I'd be just as happy with Universal Studios.'

  'What was your wish?' Zoë asks Elise.

  'I don't want to talk about it.'

  'Don't be silly, you can tell us.'

  'Look it's bad enough I have to do it without dwelling on it ahead of time.'

  Sounds intriguing. And unpleasant. Jolly good.

  'Lara?'

  'I can't remember my exact wording,' I lie. 'I just said I wanted to hang out with you guys.'

  'Awww, you old softie!' Zoë pulls me into a hug. 'What a waste of a wish!'

  'So basically, there's no mystery with what Zoë and I are going to get – she's doing the movie star bit, I'm doing rollercoasters,' Elliot summarizes. 'Sasha – who knows? But it won't be LA, that's for sure.' He turns to me. 'Lara, I don't really see how your togetherness thing is going to work if we're all whizzing in different directions.'

  ‘That's true,' Sasha looks concerned.

  'And Elise—‘

  ‘Don't!' she warns.

  'You may as well—'

  'Aloha!'

  We turn to find ourselves greeted by Helen's mentor – a voluptuous nut-brown surfer woman wearing a red sarong and straw cowboy hat that’s creating a lattice effect of light and shade on her smiling face. 'I'm stoked to meet you all!'