Bitter Ashes (Bitter Ashes Book 1)

by Sara C. Roethle

  “I've been dreaming about having you chained to a wall,” he said melodiously as I struggled against him. “It looks like my dreams are about to come true.”

  Sophie turned worried eyes to me as she backed herself toward the vines. I realized what she was going to do as the first tear crept slowly down her face.

  “I'm sorry, Maddy,” she said softly before turning her sad eyes to James.

  “I'd stop you,” he began, “but what I'm going to do to your brother will cause you so much more pain than knives and fire ever could.”

  I started struggling again as Sophie lowered herself into the vines. She met my eyes until the vines reached her face and pulled her down into the swirling mass.

  I continued struggling as James pulled me back away from the only route of escape. “You can't kill me,” I grunted as James' squeezed me tight enough to cut off my air supply. “Estus needs me.”

  James laughed. “Accidents happen,” he said happily as he forced me back down the hallway. “An accident happened with the last executioner, and we found a new one just fine.”

  My mind raced at his admission. “So he wasn't a traitor then?” I breathed.

  James laughed. “He couldn't figure out how to find the charm. I had hoped to inspire him, but I might have gone too far.”

  “So you knew?” I gasped. “You've known what Estus was looking for since the beginning?”

  We had reached the door with its melted lock just as Alaric came into view. His chest and neck were a bloody mess. I could feel every single cut on his body as he stood there in front of us. Alaric sneered his unnaturally elongated teeth at James. I had only seen his teeth look like that one other time, and that was right after he'd bitten a man's throat out. Even as injured as he was, he still planned on a fight.

  James let me go so that he could face down Alaric. “You better not have hurt Stella,” he commented.

  Alaric glared at James defiantly, then spit blood onto the ground. Whether it was his own blood, or someone else's, I wasn't sure. “You'll have to get through me to find out.”

  James took one step forward.

  “That, will not be necessary,” Estus said as he came into view behind Alaric.

  Alaric closed in and repositioned himself in front of me, ignoring the threat of James for the greater threat of Estus.

  Estus cocked his head to one side, making his loose gray hair stream over his shoulders and dark colored robes like silk.

  “Truly Alaric,” he said calmly, “you could have at least tried to keep your sister here.”

  Alaric got down on one knee and bowed his head. “I was preoccupied,” he apologized, “but at least you still have your executioner.”

  I looked from Estus to Alaric in confusion. Just a moment before he had been ready to fight James, and now that Estus was here, he was just handing me over? I stared down at Alaric, willing him to look up and meet my eyes, but he just kneeled there as a small pool of blood formed underneath him.

  “Take her to a cell,” Estus ordered.

  James looked just as shocked as I felt. “He was helping them,” he stated, pointing at Alaric's still form. “I should be bringing him to a cell.”

  Estus looked directly at me when he said, “Alaric was working on my orders. Madeline is the only prisoner here.”

  James growled and grabbed me again, shoving me forward harder than he needed to. Alaric kept his head bowed as Estus approached him, then we turned a corner and I could no longer see the true traitor in my life.

  Chapter Twelve

  My bones ached from the cold as I slowly lifted myself to a seated position. I had no idea how long I'd been left alone in the dark, but judging by the pain in my stomach, I'd say at least 24 hours. The side I'd been lying on slowly regained feeling as I looked groggily around for any sign of where I was.

  I reached forward blindly until my hands met with cool metal. I snaked my grip around the bars as everything came crashing back. Sophie and Maya, James, Estus . . . and Alaric. He had betrayed me, and now I was in the same dungeon we had rescued Maya from. Poetic justice at its best.

  With nothing to comfort me in the pure darkness, I resorted to curling up in a corner with my back pressed against the wall. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut. The darkness was much worse than the hunger or cold. I laid there for what felt like hours. Every time I tried to open my eyes, I would panic from lack of bearings. Realistically I knew I was in a cell by myself, but when you can't even see an inch in front of your nose, you constantly feel like you're about to run into something.

  A noise somewhere down the long hall that ended in my cell startled me back into full awareness. My eyes snapped open before I could stop them, only this time I wasn't assaulted by the oppressive darkness. The light at the end of the hall crept closer, and a sliver of hope made my heart race.

  That hope sank to the pit of my stomach when I saw who was approaching. James eyed me thoughtfully with his cold, pale eyes as he came to stand in front of me. His eyes reminded me of the eyes of a corpse . . . cold, dead, and unfeeling. Not liking the feeling of him looking down on me while I huddled in my corner, I forced myself to my feet.

  He eyed me for a few more silent moments, as if he'd memorize the pitiful sight of me, then he smirked. “I just don't see it,” he said softly as he shook his head.

  “See-” I rasped, then took a moment to wet my throat. “See what?” The words felt foreign on my tongue after the prolonged silence of my imprisonment. Emotions that I'd been avoiding came flooding into reality, now that I had a target for them.

  “Why Estus won't let me kill you,” he stated bluntly as he pushed his golden hair out of his face.

  His hair was that annoying length where it's almost long enough to tuck behind the ears, but not quite, so it always just fell forward instead. His hair and faintly tan skin gave the image of someone who spent a lot of time hiking, or doing other outdoor activities, yet looks can be deceiving. James' favorite activities were reserved for dark rooms, behind locked doors.

  I leaned back against the wall with my hips slightly jutted forward in an aggressive stance. I'd only done it because I was ready to lose my feet, but James didn't need to know that. When in doubt, try to look tough.

  “What do you want?” I asked coolly, ignoring his insult.

  James put his free hand on one of the bars of my cell so he could lean forward and leer at me. “Just because Estus won't let me kill you, doesn't mean I can't harm you. I wanted to see you so that I could picture clearly what I'm going to do to you.”

  I glared at him in response. The idea of being left to James' tender mercies made me want to scream. I'd seen what he liked to do to his victims. I doubted I would come out of the ordeal mentally or physically intact.

  “It must have hurt when Alaric let me carry you off,” he said suddenly.

  I knew he was just trying to get a reaction out of me, but I couldn't help the hurt expression that crossed my face. It had hurt, but even more than that, it had been humiliating. I never should have trusted Alaric, and I was paying for that mistake ten-fold.

  I corrected my expression to one of extreme distaste and grumbled, “Fuck off.”

  James lifted his hands in a mock expression of fear. “Oooh, the little girl has some teeth after all.”

  I staggered closer to where James was leaning and pushed my face against the cool steel, inches from where his hand gripped the bar. “Come closer and I'll show you my teeth,” I taunted.

  James laughed at me, but he pushed away from the bars instead of leaning closer. “All in due time, darlin'. All in due time.”

  With a final laugh he walked back down the hall, taking the light with him. I slumped back into my corner, feeling utterly defeated. Sophie had abandoned me, Alaric had betrayed me, and the only person who cared enough to visit my cell was a deranged sadist. I had heard that things start to go downhill when you neared thirty, but this was just ridiculous.

  The darkness eased again sometime later
as someone I didn't know came into view with a torch. The woman slid a hunk of bread and a single, small cup of water through the bars of my cell, then silently walked away.

  As I devoured the bread so fast that I almost choked, I thought of what the food delivery might mean. Estus obviously wanted me alive, at least for the time being. He still needed an executioner to find his stupid charm, though I'd be damned if I was going to find it for him. He'd kill me as soon as I did. After I died, there would be no one to release my spirit, so some part of me would be stuck in my dismembered corpse forever.

  The thought almost made the bread come back up, but I forced it back down with a gulp of water. By this point, I was pretty sure that Estus kept many hearts in the same place he'd shown me the heart of the last executioner. I would not be surprised if there was a drawer reserved in that room for me. There probably was one for Sophie too, if she ever came back. Alaric's heart was safe, if he even had one.

  I quickly tried to turn my thoughts away from Sophie and Alaric, but the bitter feeling of betrayal flooded in regardless. I had helped Sophie free Maya, and the two of them left me to rot. I should have never trusted Sophie or Alaric. I shouldn't have trusted anyone. To the Vaettir, I was a tool, and nothing more.

  I couldn't help but feel like everything that had happened was punishment for being what I was. I could trash talk the other Vaettir as much as I wanted, but it was my curse to take life. It was my curse that had gotten me into this position. It seemed so much worse than having telekinesis or turning part feline from time to time.

  I couldn't blame the humans who were frightened of us centuries ago, forcing the Vaettir to go into hiding. In hiding was where we deserved to be. It was where I deserved to be. Still, if I had the opportunity, I would go live amongst the humans again, even if it endangered them. Call me selfish all you want. You'd be right.

  I was startled as another light came into view. I had already been fed, and James had already taunted me, so there was no reason for anyone else to visit me.

  My heart pattered nervously, hoping in spite of myself that this new visitor would be Alaric. He would come and tell me that it had been an elaborate ruse. He had been on my side all along, but couldn't let Estus know. I would be freed at once and we would run away together.

  I was overwhelmed by a sinking feeling in my gut as Sivi came into view. The pale, fairy-like creature swayed toward my cell, though her feet didn't make a sound. Her violet eyes and translucent hair were illuminated by a small, hovering light in the palm of her hand. I wasn't even surprised by the free-floating ball of light. I'd seen things more astounding from the other Vaettir ten times over.

  Sivi cocked her head as she observed me. “I told you not to trust them,” she chided. “You could have been free.”

  “Lack of foresight is a real bitch,” I grumbled. “What do you want?”

  “I want the charm,” she said simply. “I will free you in return.”

  “What would you do with it?” I asked, actually considering the offer.

  The charm would give one of the Vaettir the power to rule over all of the clans. Sivi probably wouldn't make a good leader, but I'd take her over Estus any day of the week.

  “I would put us back where we belong,” she answered. “We are guardians of nature. To live in this cage is blasphemy.”

  The cage she was referring to was the Salr, and she was right. It was supposed to be for emergencies only. If the Vaettir were attacked, they could retreat and be protected. They had retreated all right, but they never left again as intended.

  “And what of those who would resist?” I pressed. “Many of the Vaettir enjoy their relatively new existence.”

  Sivi shrugged and made it clear by her expression that I was boring her. “They will die. Those who choose this life are abominations. This is not what we're meant to be.”

  I rose to my feet and walked toward the bars of my cell. At 5'9”, I towered over Sivi, and I felt a little better looking down at the tiny woman rather than looking up at her.

  “What about the humans?” I asked. “The world is not how it used to be.”

  Sivi spat on the ground in disgust. “The Vaettir are far greater in number now. We will not be hunted as we were in the past. Humans will grovel at our feet and beg forgiveness for what they have done.”

  “And that is our natural place?” I asked skeptically. “Nature guardians who rule over humanity?”

  “The humans have destroyed what we were created to protect,” she said almost sadly, then her face contorted back to anger as she added, “and they will pay.”

  I shook my head. “I don't think I'll be helping you.”

  Sivi pressed her face close to mine and sneered so that I could see her tiny, pointed teeth. “You would rather rot here than be free?” she snarled. “You're a fool.”

  I shrugged. “At least this way, I'll be the only one to die.”

  Sivi let out an ugly laugh. “An executioner that values life, how precious. You're as twisted as the rest of them.”

  I didn't really like being lumped in with the rest of them, since they had only brought me grief, but I kept quiet. I was more concerned with the fate of humans than I was with the fate of the Vaettir. Plus, I was beginning to believe that the Vaettir really were all evil. I didn't particularly want to help any of them. If I was going to die a gruesome, torturous death, I might as well do it with a bit of dignity.

  Sivi glared at me for a moment longer, then turned to go. I watched as her slender form seemed to levitate down the hallway silently. She stopped half-way down the hall and looked back over her bony shoulder at me with a malicious grin. “Remember when it comes time to choose sides, that one ruler locked you in the cell, and the other would have had you freed.”

  I fell back to the ground as she disappeared from view, regretting my decision, but knowing I could have done no different. I'd done enough harm already. I'd be damned if I was going to sacrifice countless human lives just for a chance to see the sun again. A few, maybe, but not the large scale bloodshed Sivi had in mind.

  Chapter Thirteen

  It seemed like a full day had passed before I once again saw the light of a torch. A man and a women I had never seen before removed me from my cell, and held me up by my arms as we walked down the hall, then ascended the enormous, stone stairway that led away from the dungeon. I was weak enough that I didn't argue or try to escape. I was just happy to be out of the darkness.

  The man glanced at me nervously as we walked. He looked young, with dark hair cropped close to his skull, making his blue eyes seem wider. He seemed unsure of himself. I almost thought about trying to reason with him, but then I saw the woman's face. Her lovely hazel eyes looked at me with an expression that said it all. I was the scum of the earth, a traitor, and I deserved what I had coming to me. She tossed her ginger colored hair over her shoulder as she looked away, a gesture perfected by mean girls the world over.

  I was beginning to see that Estus' power didn't only extend to telekinetic feats and a little mind reading. His real power was in the sway he held over his people. If he told them that jumping off a bridge would help their clan, I had little doubt that most of them would do it.

  The couple brought me to a bathroom I'd never been to, though it was nearly identical to the one I'd used on a regular basis before my imprisonment. They shoved me ahead of them, then shut the door behind us. The woman gestured to the bathtub.

  I glanced at the clean, white, tub, having no desire to hop in. “What's the point of bathing if James is just going to kill me?”

  The woman wrinkled her nose at me. “You stink.”

  I looked at the tub again, then back to the man and woman blocking the doorway. I could try getting past them, but I doubted Estus would send only two people to guard me if they weren't fully equipped for the task.

  Deciding that it wasn't my time to escape, I turned my back and began undressing. My black silk top was in surprisingly good shape, as were the black jeans I wore.
I did stink though. Sweating during the attempted escape with Sophie, then lying in a dungeon for several days had taken its toll.

  I slipped down into the bathtub before even filling the water, wanting to cover my nudity as soon as possible. The man and woman watched me dispassionately, not interested in my state of undress either way.

  I plugged the drain and turned on the faucet, then turned back to my prison guards. “So,” I began casually, “what lies has Estus told you about me?”

  The woman glared at me. “You are a traitor, working for Aislin. You freed a valuable prisoner, and so, have been sentenced to death.”

  I gulped. I'd known I was likely going to die, but hearing it out loud made it seem a little more real. “Is that where you're taking me once I'm clean? To be killed?”

  The woman shook her head, but kept her eyes forward. “You must be questioned first.”

  The man beside her was beginning to sweat profusely. Either he was nervous to be around a traitor, or he didn't like what was happening. Perhaps Estus' sway wasn't as complete as I'd originally thought.

  “To what end?” I pressed. “I know nothing of value.”

  When the woman didn't answer, the young man finally met my eyes. “That is not for us to know.”

  I smirked at him, though my insides were filled with sickly acid. “Your Doyen says jump, and you say how high?”

  The woman sneered at me. “Hurry up and bathe. Your very presence taints us.”

  I tsked at her and began washing myself as I mumbled, “There's no need to be insulting.”

  She gave no sign that she heard me, and instead stared straight ahead. A good little soldier.

  I finished bathing, and stepped out to dry myself off with a nearby towel. My guards both still stood directly in front of the door. The only way I might escape them was to try it after we left the bathroom, but at that point they would both have a hold on me again, and I was almost too weak to stand.