by Cali MacKay
“I don’t see how that’s any of your concern.” He’d already wiped his hands clean of me, so why the hell was he here?
“It is my concern when you’ve put a target on your back, and there’s a good chance you’re going to get yourself killed.” As if coming to his senses, he let go of me and took a step back, running a rough hand through his hair. Clearly, nothing had changed since the day he walked away. “One of Munroe’s men paid me a visit.”
Shit. “What did he want?”
The kindness was still there in his eyes, as was the undeniable heat between us. “He wanted to make it clear that Munroe didn’t have anything to do with your father’s death.”
“What? That doesn’t make any sense.” My father had stolen money from Munroe, so why the hell would anyone else have gone after him? “He has to be lying about that, Locke. If he wasn’t behind it, then why the hell did he hire you in the first place?”
“Em… Munroe wasn’t the only one your father cheated out of money, and the others aren’t happy to hear that you’re sniffing around, looking for answers and wanting revenge.” His words were like a punch to the gut, as it became clear that I hadn’t been careful enough with my investigating. “You’re playing a dangerous game, Em—one that you’ll likely lose. And trust me when I tell you, they did not have to give me a heads-up. You’re going to get yourself killed.”
I mulled over the information Locke just gave me about my dad—which made it clear that I truly didn’t know who my father had been or the life my father was living. What the hell had he been thinking?
As if stealing from Munroe hadn’t been bad enough—my dad had stolen from others too. He must have had one hell of a problem…or maybe he’d been trying to cover his tracks by replacing the money he’d taken from one account by stealing from another, with the hope that he’d somehow make it back before anyone noticed.
Except that obviously never happened, since he was now dead.
“Well, I appreciate your concern, but I’m no longer your problem.” I tried to stay as formal as possible, knowing just how easy it would be to give in to him and the attraction that clearly still existed between us, even if he hated me for lying to him. Not that I could really blame him. “Was there anything else?”
Locke let out a ragged breath, looking at me like he could read my every thought. “Revenge won’t bring them back, Em.”
“Don’t you think I don’t know that? But…the more I think about it, the more I’m convinced that someone simply killed my family—and my dad had little to do with actually pulling the trigger. I just don’t know how I’m supposed to let that go without knowing the truth.” It’s not like I hadn’t tried. But…I needed to figure out what happened so I could move past it. I wanted to start my new life with a clean slate…without this part of my life haunting me. Therapy was barely taking the edge off my anger and heartache, and wouldn’t do me any good until I had the answers I was looking for.
“For fuck’s sake…didn’t you learn your lesson? No good can come of this.”
He looked ready to shake some sense into me—for all the good it’d do. ’Cause he was right…after losing Locke, I should know better than to continue pursuing this—except that now, I had nothing to lose.
“Why do you even care?” He’d made it clear that things were over between us, since there was no way he could trust me after what I did. So why the hell was he here?
“Em…I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to you.” He looked as frustrated as I felt, though the hardness in his eyes from six weeks ago had softened just enough to give my stupid heart hope.
“You’re not supposed to say anything, because you’re not supposed to be here. Hell… If I hadn’t been away at college when my dad decided to murder the rest of my family, I wouldn’t be here either.” I hated that tears stung my eyes, but it only made me more determined not to let them fall, stealing myself against the heartache that would inevitably come if I tried to pursue anything with Locke. “Please…just go. I appreciate the warning, but I’m no longer your concern, and frankly, I never should have been to begin with.” After all, I wouldn’t have even been on his radar if I hadn’t forced my way into his life with my scheming and lies.
“I hate to tell you, but I’m not going anywhere until this gets sorted.” He shrugged out of his jacket and tossed it on the back of the sofa before wandering into the kitchen and pulling open the fridge door as if he lived here, as I rolled my eyes at him. “Can I get you anything?”
“For fuck’s sake, just go, Locke. I don’t need your help, and I don’t need you reminding me of everything I’ve lost. I do a good enough job of that all on my own.” Which was probably why I couldn’t just let go of what happened to my family. I knew it was stupid and dangerous, but I wanted answers. I wanted to know exactly what happened that night, even if it ended up putting a bull’s-eye on my back. But my loss wasn’t logical, and I was still hurting, especially when coupled with losing Locke.
“You need to let go of the past before it completely ruins you, Em. You should try to start fresh—even if it means selling this place and moving on.” Locke reached out and gave my hand a squeeze as I looked down, my tears finally escaping and slipping down my cheeks. “I hate seeing you like this.”
“Well, if you’d just leave like I asked, then it wouldn’t be an issue—and I’m not selling this house.” I knew I was being a jerk and pushing him away when he was trying to be nice, but having him here…having him so close…it only reminded me that I’d fucked things up between us.
As for selling the house, this was all I had left of my family. It was the home I’d grown up in…the home that held all my memories. Birthdays, Christmases…and if I sold it, I worried that all my memories would eventually fade away and I’d have nothing left of my family. Besides…where the hell would I go?
“I’m not leaving when you’re in danger and looking to get yourself killed.” He shot me a frustrated glare, and after all I’d put him through, I couldn’t really blame him for being impatient with me. I somehow doubted he was happy to be here, dealing with me and my problems again. “You don’t know what you’re walking into, Em. ’Cause you’re right…if the rumors are to be believed, then chances are good that your father didn’t kill himself or the rest of your family. And that means whoever killed them won’t think twice about putting a bullet in your head.”
A wave of emotion hit me as his words sunk in. My father hadn’t been the one to pull the trigger…
My family had been murdered.
My heart broke for Emie as she let out a choked sob, her knees practically giving out from under her, as I pulled her into my arms and held onto her. I was sure that it must feel like she’d lost her family all over again. “I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with all of this, Em, but making yourself a target isn’t going to bring them back. You need to let it go, and we need to find a way to keep you safe.”
She pulled away enough to wipe away her tears. “I wish I could, Locke. But shouldn’t justice be served? I know my dad screwed up, but it didn’t warrant taking his life—and my mother and sister were completely innocent.”
“Em…I get that. I honestly do.” I let out a weary sigh, fighting back an onslaught of emotion. I was still so fucking angry with her, but I hated seeing her upset. And having her close…having her in my arms…I’d fucking missed her. “But no matter what happened to your family, you need to stop before they come after you. Because, I swear, I’m not exaggerating when I say that these people are dangerous, and you’ve gone and kicked the hornet’s nest.”
“I’ll manage just fine on my own. You shouldn’t be here worrying about me.” She bit her lip as I tucked a loose strand of dark hair behind her ear, my eyes wandering over her face as I did my best to ignore the way her curves pressed up against my body.
“There’s no way you can protect yourself on your own—and I do worry about you, Em.” I fucking hated this. “I meant it when I said that I had feelings for you
. That wasn’t a lie.”
“I know it wasn’t. But I managed to screw that up, and now it’s over.” She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and then pulled away from me, wrapping her arms around herself. “I don’t want to drag you into my mess of a life.”
“I can take care of myself. I don’t need you worrying about me.” At this point, she should be worrying about keeping herself safe. “I’ll put the word out that you’re under my protection, but it may already be too late for that.”
“And what about my family? What about finding the bastards who murdered them?” She sucked in a deep breath and let it out on a ragged sigh, looking to me for answers I wasn’t sure I had.
“You’ll need to leave it alone, Em. Even if you go to the cops, the rumors are just hearsay with no evidence to back up any of it, and it wouldn’t eliminate the danger you’re in.” I knew it was asking a lot of her not to pursue her family’s killers, and frankly, when I’d been put in the same situation with my father’s murder, I’d wanted revenge and justice. But her options short of dropping it were nonexistent.
“So…that’s it? I just have to be happy with knowing the truth and not being able to do anything about it?” She shook her head no, though it was clear by the look in her eyes that she knew she didn’t have much of a choice.
“I’m sorry, baby…I really am.” My anger with her was waning, though I was desperate to hold onto it like a layer of armor. Because one thing was clear—Emie was fully capable of breaking my heart…of destroying me. “Maybe you should get out of Seattle for a bit. A change of scenery may do you some good, and it might not hurt to let the dust from all this settle. You need to think about keeping yourself safe, above all.”
“And go where, Locke? I have no one who’d take me in for more than a few days, and I can’t put them in danger. And I could go to a hotel, but I don’t have the money to live there indefinitely.”
Except she did have someone…me.
“You can stay with me. Pack your bags.” It wasn’t ideal, but her options were limited and I’d never forgive myself if something happened to her. And at the very least, it’d pull Bear out of his funk.
She shook her head no. “I can’t. Not after everything I put you through.”
“Well, you can’t stay here, Em. It’s far too dangerous at the moment, and like you said, you have nowhere else to go.” I gave her hand a squeeze, trying to reassure her that everything would be okay. “We’ll find a way to make it work.”
She looked like she wanted to argue with me, but she resigned herself and quickly packed a bag. I had her follow me back to my place so she’d have her car, but as I drove back to my place, my thoughts raced and my emotions churned.
This was not going to be easy.
Needless to say, Bear was ecstatic to see her, practically knocking her to the floor as I hauled him away, though she still knelt down by his side, giving him a huge hug, holding onto him tight. Clearly, Bear saw no issues with having her stay with us. “He’s happy to have you back, Em.”
“I missed him too.” She gave him a final scratch behind the ears before standing and slipping her hands in her jean pockets, her gaze settling anywhere but on me. “I’m truly sorry, Locke. And being back here…it just reminds me of how horrible I was to you when you were nothing but sweet and kind and caring.”
“Apology accepted.” Not that it negated what happened between us, since I still didn’t feel like I could trust her when it came to anything more than simply being friends. Except that seeing her again was stirring up all sorts of emotions, and I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it all. “I’ll put word out that you’re now under the protection of me and my family. I’m not sure it’ll be enough to keep you safe, but it’s worth a shot.”
At the very least, it might buy us some time until I could figure out who was after her. And with her staying with me, at the very least, I’d be able to keep an eye on her and it’d be a hell of a lot harder for her to get herself into trouble.
“After everything I put you through…I can’t believe you’d do that for me. Why?” She chewed her bottom lip, her eyes gazing up at me in question, my body drawn to hers as if by an unseen force.
It was so fucking hard not to touch her, and I knew that if she was living here with me, I was going to have one hell of a time not giving in to what was still between us. Because the walls I’d built? They were already starting to crumble. “Like I said, I care about you, Em. It’d kill me if something happened to you. And…fuck. I’ve missed you.”
The moment the words were out of my mouth, I regretted it, even if it was nothing but the truth.
“Does that mean you’ve forgiven me for what I put you through?” She looked up at me, so hopeful that it fucking killed me.
“Forgiving you is the easy part, Em. And I do forgive you. I get why you lied to me. But…I’m sorry. The hard part is going to be learning to trust you again.” When her eyes shimmered with tears, it took all I had not to pull her into my arms. “I wish that weren’t the case, but for now…I’m afraid it is.”
She just nodded and grabbed her bag. “It’s late. I think I’m going to call it a night, if that’s okay with you.”
“Yeah, of course. You can take the room across from mine. It’s the room you stayed in when you were last here.” I grabbed her bag for her and led the way, though it was damn hard to resist the urge to drag her to my bed. No good could come of it, though it didn’t keep my body from wanting her…from remembering what it was like to have her tight body wrapped around mine.
She hesitated in the doorway of her room, looking uncertain. “Locke… When you’re feeling up for it, we should talk.”
I didn’t know what we had to say to each other at this point, but I nodded, still trying to come to terms with the fact that Emie was now back in my life—even if it was temporary.
Before heading to bed, I grabbed my phone and called Dane, needing information. If someone was after Em, I needed to know who, so I could put a stop to it before things got out of control.
I spent the night tossing and turning, like most nights as of late. Except that tonight was even worse than usual, knowing that I was back in Locke’s home and under his protection once again—except that the threat to my life was real this time around.
I’d really fucked things up. I hadn’t realized that anyone would notice me making a few phone calls and talking to a few people. But they had noticed, and now I’d managed to drag Locke back into my mess of a life.
Six a.m. I groaned and, knowing I wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep, I dragged myself into the shower, letting the hot water pound on me. I still couldn’t believe Locke was back in my life again, after six weeks of not hearing a single word from him. Though in some ways, seeing him had probably been inevitable. Now all I had to do was stay alive long enough to mend things between us.
By the time I hopped out of the shower and headed downstairs, Lock was already up and cooking breakfast. “How did you sleep, Em?”
I shrugged, not wanting to lie to him. “Unfortunately, sleep’s been elusive as of late. It sometimes helps to go for a late-night walk, but it was already too late last night.”
“Well, maybe tonight we can head for a walk. See if that helps any.” Locke served up some eggs, bacon, and toast, and slid my plate onto the breakfast bar, before pouring me a cup of coffee. “Eat up.”
“Thanks.” I forced myself to take a few bites, though my stomach churned at the smell, making me curse myself for being stupid.
Locke sat down next to me and had already devoured most of his meal, which was easily double the amount on my plate, when he noticed I wasn’t eating. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah…no…damn it.” I swore under my breath. “I’m sorry. Everything is just so messed up. And being here…it reminds me of how I screwed everything up. And now? I hate that I’m putting you through all this.”
He let out a weary sigh, shaking his head. “I get that you’re sorry about what ha
ppened between us. And I wish that I could just forget it all. But I can’t just flip a switch. It’s just going to take time, Em.”
“I know.” Except that I had a feeling time was working against me.
Locke finished up his breakfast as I managed a few more bites. But with the dishes in the sink and breakfast out of the way, he turned to me as he leaned back against the counter. “Listen…I’ve got a meeting I can’t really get out of, but I’ll only be gone for a few hours. Are you going to be okay staying here on your own? Or would you rather I drop you off at my mom’s?”
“I’m fine here on my own. I’ve got stuff I need to take care of anyway.” Like getting a pregnancy test. Not that I should be shocked. But after everything that happened, I’d done my best not to think of Locke, my heartache just too raw to deal with when he wanted nothing to do with me. And though I wasn’t ever terribly regular, things were running a bit late, even for me.
“Do not go back to your house, Em. I mean it. It’s not safe.” He grabbed my hips and pulled me to him, making my heart hammer and my breath catch.
“I won’t. You have my word. I won’t head home.” As he tightened his hold on me, my hands automatically landed on his muscular chest as I tried to slow my racing pulse.
Try as I might, I hadn’t been able to stop thinking of him—which, of course, only reminded me of how badly I’d screwed up. Yet despite our issues, there was no denying the attraction between us, the air fraught with sexual tension as I looked up at him.
My heart hammered away when he bent his head to mine and brushed his lips against mine in a kiss that held so many questions and even more uncertainties. And though I wanted to linger there in his arms and forget our reality, I knew it was pointless when it’d still be there to slap me in the face.
Somehow, I found the strength to pull away before I lost myself in his kisses. “Locke…what are we doing here?”
He let out a weary sigh, taking a step back and running his hand through his hair. “I’ve missed you, Em. And having you close…it’s fucking hard.”