Toxic

by Debra Jupe

  She sat motionless, staring at him, unsure how to respond. He hadn’t hurt her, nor did she believe he would intentionally. But could she give herself to him right now, after such a near violent episode. Then again, his dreams weren’t his fault, and he did seem remorseful.

  She nodded nervously.

  He closed in on her, wrapping his arms around her. “Thank you,” he sighed into her hair. His mouth found hers again. His tongue pressed to slide though her teeth, touching, dancing with hers, and attempting a complete surrender. She tensed, her arms slipped across his shoulders, giving into his advance.

  After a long while of kissing, he pulled away. “We okay now?”

  Her head bobbed, her features relaxed. “Do you want to talk about your nightmare some more?”

  He gave her a lazy grin. His head lowered to find her lips again. “Later.”

  ****

  Sunlight shimmered through the window. She shook her head, trying to assimilate. What had awakened her?

  “Your phone’s ringing, Gracie.” Ethan mumbled. He rolled away, hiding his face with a pillow.

  She stretched to her nightstand to retrieve her cell, but it wasn’t there. Right. Her phone was in her purse which was still inside her truck. “Not mine, Ethan, it must be yours.”

  “Shit.” Ethan rolled off the mattress, surged to his feet, and rushed into the bathroom. He answered in a clipped tone. “McCarthy.”

  She got out of bed, put on her robe, and hurried downstairs to give him privacy. She headed into the laundry room to switch his clothes to the dryer. She would’ve preferred to stay and eavesdropped, but she didn’t want to be one of “those” women.

  While she waited, she stopped by the refrigerator for a soda, then went to her double secret stash of candy for some chocolate and emptied the supply she kept for when she was low in all her other storage places. Definitely time to make a trip to the store.

  Fifteen minutes later the candy and soda were gone. Ethan marched down the stairs, a towel around his waist. Ignoring last night’s off episode, her stomach lurched. It didn’t get much better, and she was sleeping with him.

  “I have to go,” he said as his foot slapped the bottom step.

  Shock jolted through her. “Now?”

  He nodded, not meeting her gaze. “Where are my clothes?”

  “In the dryer.”

  “I need them.”

  “They aren’t ready.”

  “Doesn’t matter.” His voice was cool and polite. Like they were almost strangers.

  A sharp sting vaulted inside her stomach as she went to retrieve his things.

  Moments later she returned. He took his almost-dry clothing without a word and hurried upstairs. Within minutes he was dressed and headed to the door. He touched the knob. What might’ve been an afterthought, he skidded to a halt and turned to her.

  “Sorry for the rush, but…I just need to go.” He pushed his fingers through his hair. “And we need to keep our little interlude between us. Are you okay with that?”

  Gracie’s insides took a nosedive. He was ashamed of being with her. Slowly, she nodded, as if she could do anything else but agree.

  “Thanks.” The relief in his expression was obvious. “Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Ms. Desoto.”

  Chapter 10

  Ethan raced away from Gracie’s house without a glance behind. His conscience wouldn’t allow him to look back. Badgered with guilt, he cerebrally kicked himself. Why didn’t he go with his first plan and cancel—no, he’d been aware of their mutual attraction the moment they met. He should have steered clear of Gracie Desoto from day one.

  His brain definitely hadn’t been involved in the thought process where she was concerned. He’d disregarded every respectable instinct to answer his primal urges, and he loathed himself for what he’d done to her.

  Massaging her small memento on his forehead, he knew the moment would come when they had to part ways. He thought he was prepared and was surprised how much he’d dreaded leaving her, and he hated doing so in such a cold manner. But it had to be done.

  The woman was now his past, and that’s where she must stay.

  The next few days would be tough. His focus from here on would be on the bigger picture and find the person who tried to kill him. Plus his damn nightmare had returned. Hopefully it was a onetime thing, but if not, he’d have that trauma to contend with again. Then there was this newest catastrophe.

  He rammed the accelerator and retrieved his cell at the same time. One press of a button and the phone automatically dialed the number.

  “Okay, I can talk now,” he growled when his connection picked up. “What the fuck happened?”

  “Exactly what I told you. I got the word, and I called you right away.” The other end paused. “The boss tried to get in touch with you too, but you weren’t available. Where the hell did you disappear to?”

  “Busy.”

  “I bet.”

  “My private life isn’t open for discussion. We’ve got more important things to talk about anyway.”

  “You’re right. Just be forewarned. She’s is super ticked over your,” his cohort hesitated to do a throat clear. “Unavailability.”

  “No one’s business. I made no promises to anyone; therefore, I maintain exclusive rights on my free time.”

  The last thing he needed was someone making more demands of him, especially her. He worked twenty-four seven, and he made sure he took advantage of the few off moments of his own he had. She and all of them could go to hell if they had any problems with his attitude. He’d tell them to their face, too. Right now he was tired, mad, and he didn’t care who he pissed off.

  “I’m not going to argue, except to suggest you might want to consider lowering your profile.”

  “My visibility is already minimal,” Ethan said. “Or minutest as it can be, given my situation.”

  “You’re still too obvious. You can tell me to fuck off, but here’s a word of advice. Make yourself undetectable. It’ll keep you safe, and ensure your new lady friend stays out of harm’s way.”

  “No new lady anything. We had a weekend and that’s all. We’re done. Finished. You know I don’t get too involved. Her safety isn’t an issue.”

  “Just making sure nothing’s changed.”

  Ethan bounced the foot on the brake pedal as an amber stoplight switched to red. His truck screeched to a halt. Frustrated, his eyes seesawed from one side to the other, glaring at the empty crossroad in front of him. Fingers drummed the top of the steering wheel. “Has the news been made public?”

  “Not yet. Only a matter of time, though. Prepare for the worst once the word gets out. Every local media outlet will blast the story along with their spin, no doubt.”

  “No doubt.” Ethan repeated. “God, this is a major fuck-up.”

  The signal went to green. Ethan punched the gas; the vehicle roared forward.

  Tires squealed against the pavement.

  “No shit. All our efforts shot to hell. Everything’s at risk now. We need to regroup. Back to square one.” A long silence stretched between them. “We’ve been summoned to a meeting later this evening.”

  “Got it.” He rolled into his secluded drive, skillfully guiding his truck around the snaky bends until he pulled into the driveway. He killed the engine.

  “What time is the meeting?”

  “Seven-thirty. You plan to show, right?”

  “Count on it.”

  ****

  Betty swung her chair away from her computer screen and eyed Gracie as she strolled into her office Monday morning.

  “Hey Betty.” Gracie did her best to project a feign calm. After the weekend, Ethan’s dream, and the abrupt way she’d been left, she didn’t want to give away the anxiety twisting through her.

  Betty would nag her to death if she had a clue.

  “Any messages I need to attend to?”

  “I printed the Griffin contracts for you to sign so I can scan them and email back.” Betty r
eached into a basket and retrieved a folder filled with a stack of papers and handed them to Gracie. “A humdinger of a weekend, huh?”

  “I’ll say. With a huge day ahead.” Gracie opened the file and thumbed through the pages. “A busy week for that matter.”

  “I wasn’t referring to business.”

  Gracie’s face reddened. Her chin dipped to stare at the paperwork. The typed words blurred together. “What exactly are you referring to?”

  Betty’s gaze bored into her. “Don’t play dumb with me, missy.”

  Gracie raised her head. “Betty, I have no idea what you’re getting at.” She hurried toward her office, hoping to end this conversation before it began. “I should get to work.”

  “Sex, girl. I’m talking about sex.”

  Gracie stopped. The folder slipped through her fingers and plopped to the floor. Sheets floated and scattered across the tiles.

  “It’s written all over you.” A broad smile extended over Betty’s face. “You got lucky this weekend, didn’t you? More than once, from the looks of you.” She reached for her steaming cup and blew before she tasted a tiny sip. “’Bout time too, that’s all I got to say.”

  “You mean, you can tell?” Gracie remained still as a statue, gazing at Betty, disbelievingly. “No you can’t. You’re guessing.”

  “I’m a widow, Gracie. For a long time I grieved the loss of my husband and my marriage, same as you. I know the look. You’re glowing like a beacon in a dense fog. So who’s the lucky guy? The luscious Ethan, I hope?”

  Gracie hurried into her office to the small fridge for a soda. She would need a double dose of sugar to get through this. She kept talking, knowing Betty would follow. “I’d rather not discuss my private life, Betty.” She was also aware her secretary wouldn’t let this go. She only hoped she’d keep her “discovery” to herself and not blab everything to anyone, especially her mother.

  “Suit yourself.” Betty almost huffed, standing in the doorway. “I understand.”

  “I’m sure.”

  “I do. Not many people are aware of this, but I’ve had a gentleman in my life for some time. I keep what happens between the sheets confidential.”

  Gracie’s lips twisted. This big secret didn’t transform into shocking news.

  Everyone in town was aware of Betty and her man’s lengthy affair. She stayed quiet and let Betty believe her relationship remained hush-hush.

  “I always had a healthy sexual appetite and like you I didn’t have a physical outlet for a long while.”

  “Oh my.” Gracie preferred not to talk about her mother’s best friend’s carnal relationship, and yet— “And because of this, this common ground, you can tell I had sex?”

  “You’re radiant, sweetie. I wish that ex of yours could see how much you glow. He’d be dumping that youngster and begging you to come back.” She chuckled. “In which your reply would be to tell him to go to hell.”

  “Not a good idea.” Gracie laughed too. “I’d rather our next encounter happen when I’m in love with a man.” She cerebrally retracted the statement. It would be awesome to run into Stewart while together with Ethan. She’d even fantasized the scenario as they ate at the restaurant Saturday. Taller, much better shape, and younger than her ex. Though she’d yet to meet his fiancée, but she bet she’d win in the good looks department.

  “I wouldn’t be surprised if you aren’t in love. Or at least telling yourself you are.”

  “I’m not in anything, Betty.” She sat her drink down and walked past her secretary to her strewn pages. She kneeled to pick them up. “This was a onetime thing.” A quiet, between them, single occurrence, per Ethan. She shoved the papers into the folder and stood, raising one leg then the other to dust off her knees. “I don’t plan on seeing him again.”

  “If you say so.”

  “I do.” She strolled back into her office. She stopped and turned to Betty. “Why would you think I can’t have just a sexual relationship? I’m single, and woman like me engage in physical activities without emotional ties.”

  “It’s not into your make up. You being alone isn’t by choice.” Betty adjusted her glasses. “Some women are programmed for carefree behavior. You’re not. You’re an all or nothing kind of woman.”

  “Maybe I was.” Gracie rushed inside her office. “I think after this weekend I can do causal, at least this once.”

  Or not. Her knees gave way to sink into her chair. Betty was right. She wasn’t an emotionless person. When she accepted Ethan’s proposition, she thought she could handle physical and leave the sentiments behind. Truthfully, she couldn’t. She liked Ethan, although she didn’t know him. An understatement for sure. She’d like to understand his nightmare better and fathom his odd departure. The fact he’d asked her to keep quiet about their weekend nearly devastated her, though she hadn’t planned on telling anyone but Krystal.

  Still, instincts told her he was a good guy. But even good guys are able to have sex without feelings. For a few hours, she’d hoped they’d defy the odds and their chance hookup would evolve into something more. But that was before the callous way he’d left her. Any hopes of a growing relationship after had died a bitter death.

  ****

  Gracie did her best to ignore her weekend activities and concentrated on locating supplies for a new client she’d just secured. The process took her most of the morning and a better part of the afternoon.

  Finally, curiosity got the best of her. She fired up her computer and typed Ethan’s name in the search engine. Many Ethan McCarthy’s popped up, but none was the man she’d been intimate with over the weekend.

  In a day where almost everyone had a virtual presence, he didn’t exist in the cyber world. She continued her research for a while, still coming up with nothing, deciding to stop when Betty poked her head in to inform that she was on her way to get them lunch.

  Gracie didn’t reveal that her appetite had disappeared, and she hadn’t eaten a bite since Saturday. She refused to hear again about the importance of regular meals for the rest of the day. And she preferred not to give away how upset she truly was over Ethan’s heartless departure. That conversation would be never ending. So, she played along and pretended she was famished.

  Thirty minutes later, the food was in front of her. She ignored the cuisine and hoped to give off the appearance she was too involved in her work to eat. With Betty’s constant checking, she was finally forced to pick up her fork.

  Her cell buzzed and gave her a sound excuse to avoid the dreaded first bite.

  Already given up on Ethan calling, she glanced at the caller ID and pressed the on button. “Hey, I’ve been meaning to call you.”

  “I’ve been waiting. I figured you were busy.”

  Krystal’s voice sounded peculiar, but Gracie chalked it up to stress from work. Whenever Mike was unhappy, he made sure his top employees were aware of his dissatisfaction and thus, they weren’t happy either.

  “I wanted to talk to you about Ethan and get your take on how to handle the situation. We had a great weekend, Krystal. I’m talking hurdle the moon sex. He spent Friday, and most of Saturday with me, and then Sunday morning, he received a phone call and abruptly left. I haven’t heard from him since. I realize our weekend was spontaneous, but…I don’t know?”

  “I don’t either, Gracie.” Krystal’s voice cracked. “I’d need more details.”

  “How about we meet for a glass of wine later in the week?”

  Gracie waited for Krystal’s response, but a long silence dragged from the other end of the line. Something was up. Krystal should be pumping her for details and suggesting they go for wine now.

  “Krystal? Are you still there?”

  “I’m here,” Krystal sobbed.

  Gracie braced herself. “Krystal, what’s wrong. Why are you crying? Did something happen between you and Charlie? If you had a fight, it’s okay. You’ll make up soon, I’m sure. We can talk about that, too.”

  “Charlie and I are fine. The nu
rsery is the problem.”

  “What happened at the nursery?”

  “We had another incident.”

  “Another incident.” Gracie took a moment to process. Someone was big into sabotaging the place lately. A new disaster had occurred.

  “It’s worse than before.”

  “How could things be as bad?” Gracie’s heart jumped into her throat and stopped. Ethan. Something had happened to him. He was hurt. “Another attempt was made on Ethan’s life. Is he okay?”

  “Not Ethan,” Krystal paused for long, sobbing breath. “Mike. He’s dead, Gracie. Somebody killed him.”

  Chapter 11

  Krystal’s words hit Gracie like a load of cement.

  “Mike is dead?”

  “Yes.”

  “How did he die?”

  “In the worst way,” Krystal sniffed. “They found him underneath a tractor. His skull was bashed, and a bullet was in his head.”

  Gracie choked on her saliva. “Oh, that’s awful.”

  “Terrible. They found him yesterday, though they hinted he might have been killed before then.” Krystal appeared to have regained her composure and spoke without emotion.

  “How long ago do they suspect?”

  “He may have died on Saturday.”

  Gracie tried to find some air. Mike was gone. This would be a huge loss to the community and for her personally. He’d maintained a hard ass, take no prisoners persona, but he’d treated her just as an employee and a customer. The man had been more than generous when she started her business, plus he’d been instrumental in sending leads, which helped her succeed. Many former employers wouldn’t lift a finger for an ex-worker, yet the man went out of his way to assist her and continued to support as her company grew.

  “A ton of detectives met us at the nursery this morning. It appeared to be a set up so they’d catch the crews by surprise for questioning.”

  Gracie wiped away a tear. “Do they think someone from the nursery murdered him?”

  “I’m sure they’re covering all the bases.”

  “It’s too late to speculate, but if he’d called in the police when the trouble started, he may still be alive.”