Promise of Paradise

by Rosemary Hammond

  A sudden surge of pure rage filled Jessica’s entire being. A brilliant red haze flashed behind her eyes, blinding her, radiating through her, and before she could even think what she was doing, her arm swept back, the flat of her hand aimed directly at Luke’s smug face with all her might.

  But before the intended blow could connect, he had reached out to grab her by the arm, forcing it behind her back. She was so angry by now, beside herself with burning mindless fury she didn’t even feel the pain.

  “And you!” she lashed out, her voice throbbing with fury. “Who do you think you are to pass judgment on me! You, with your redheads, your unmitigated arrogance. You have no right to accuse me of anything. You’ve been trying to hustle me into bed practically from the moment we met. That’s all any woman means to you, another trophy, one more notch on your belt.” She stamped her foot. “All this time you’ve been playing me along, pretending to be Mr. Nice Guy, when all you ever wanted...”

  But before she could get another word out, he’d pulled her roughly to him and his mouth came down hard on hers in a grinding, punishing, open-mouthed kiss.

  She struggled against him, beating her fists on a chest that felt made of solid steel, even kicking at his shins with her bare feet.

  Then, suddenly, she simply let go, went limp in his arms, all the fight drained out of her by the sensations his mouth was arousing in her, insidiously, against her will, but irresistible. Her mind seemed to go blank, and with a little muffled cry, she sank against the long lean body.

  An intense heat began to build inside her, and her heart was thudding heavily in her chest. She couldn’t think, could scarcely breathe. She was filled with a sense of certainty that this was exactly where she belonged, that whatever happened now was somehow destined, inevitable, and had been from the beginning.

  She raised her arms up around his neck, eagerly returning his kiss, joyfully opening her lips to receive his thrusting tongue, raking her fingers through the crisp dark hair.

  His hands were moving frantically over her bare back now, and the slight roughness as they slid over her skin only heightened her desire. She’d never felt like this before in the arms of any man, had hardly known such feelings existed. It was her first experience with naked passion and she abandoned herself to it with her whole heart and soul.

  He tore his mouth away from hers and moved it to her ear. “Oh, God, Jessica, darling,” he breathed, his voice throbbing with emotion. “You’ll never know how long I’ve wanted to hold you like this.” He raised his head and gazed down into her eyes. “I’m crazy about you, you know that don’t you?”

  All she could do was nod mutely, drowning in those emerald eyes, gleaming with desire in the light of the brightening moon. His hands were on her shoulders now, kneading gently. She waited, breathless, ready to give him anything he wanted from her, and when one hand slid with excruciating slowness from her shoulder to the base of her neck, lingering there for a moment, then dropping to cover her breast, she shuddered and closed her eyes.

  Then, his palms sliding over her skin, he reached for the straps of her top and pulled them down slowly over her shoulders. The sensation of the cooling evening air on her suddenly bare skin made her shiver a little, and as though in response, he covered her breasts with his hands.

  “You’re so beautiful, darling,” he murmured, his eyes sweeping over her. “Just as I imagined you’d be.”

  Slowly they sank down upon the sand. The tide had turned and as the water lapped around them, still warm from the heat of the day, he made love to her as she’d never experienced it before, worshipping her body with his hands and mouth, until finally they were joined together, one being.

  Later, they went to his room to shower and dress to go back to town for dinner. Love had given Jessica a ravening appetite. She felt absolutely no regret, and not even a twinge of shame at what had happened on the-beach. With Luke she had experienced a joy in lovemaking she’d never even dreamed of with Paul, her only other lover. Out there on the beach she had abandoned herself completely to him, shamelessly, in total self-giving surrender.

  It was as though her fury, when she’d tried to strike him, unleashed a flood of buried passion from somewhere deep within her, and emotions long dammed up had come rushing to the surface, overwhelming her with their intensity.

  When she was dressed she stood at the bathroom door watching him shave. He had on a pair of dark trousers, the belt undone, his upper body bare, lean and hard, the muscles of his strong arms and back working as he scraped the razor over his face.

  Unable to resist all that naked tanned flesh, she moved up silently behind him, put her arms around his waist and pressed her lips on the center of his back. When her hands began to snake over his stomach and stop, hovering, at the loose waistband of his trousers, she could feel his muscles rippling under her touch.

  He sucked in his breath and stood stock still, catching her eye in the mirror. “Better watch it, lady,” he growled.

  “Oh?” she said, cocking an eyebrow at him and continuing her exploration.

  Slowly he wiped the remaining lather off his face and turned to her, half-shaven. “Now look what you’ve done,” he murmured, reaching out for her. He pressed his mouth in her hair, his breath coming warm and soft in her ear. “Have I created a monster?”

  She drew her head back and laughed up at him. “Could be. Are you sorry?”

  “Not on your life,” he replied with feeling, and began backing her with slow steps in the direction of the bed.

  The next several weeks were the happiest of Jessica’s life. Her days at work were filled with thoughts of Luke, her nights with his compelling presence. Although they tried to be discreet and keep their affair a secret, they couldn’t help running into people they knew when they were together.

  There was also no way to hide the glow that suffused her whole being. By then it really didn’t matter. They were together, they were in love, and she assumed it was a permanent condition. That’s the way things were done in her circle.

  She had noticed, however, that Millie was behaving oddly, rather distant and aloof, and giving her strange looks from time to time. But whenever Jessica caught her eye, she’d just smile briefly and look away.

  She missed the pleasant relationship she had developed with Millie during the time she’d worked there, the closest thing to a friend she had in Florida, and worried that she might have offended her in some way.

  One afternoon, when the luncheon rush had pretty well subsided, she decided to just come right out and ask her. Millie was on her way to the kitchen and as she passed by the cashier’s desk, Jessica called out to her.

  “Millie. How about a quick cup of coffee?”

  Millie darted her a quick sideways glance. “I don’t really have time right now,” she said, and kept on going.

  “Please!” Jessica called after her.

  Millie turned around, gazed thoughtfully at her for a moment or two, then nodded abruptly. “All right. Just a quick one.”

  Jessica poured out two cups and carried them over to a table by the window, and they sat down. Millie sipped her coffee and stared out the window, drumming her fingers on the table, as though anxious to get away.

  Jessica hardly knew how to start. Finally she cleared her throat and just plunged in. “Millie, is something wrong?”

  “wrong?”

  “I mean, with your children, or something.”

  “No, nothing’s wrong,” she mumbled.

  “Well, then, have I done something to offend you?”

  Millie turned her head sharply and gave Jessica her first direct look in days. “Of course not. What ever gave you that idea?”

  Jessica shrugged. “Well, you’ve been going out of your way to avoid me for several days now, and I have to wonder why. You were always so kind, so friendly, before, that...”

  Millie sighed heavily and raised a hand, stopping her. “I’m sorry. I guess I didn’t realize I was being so obvious.” She frowned d
own at her cup for a moment, then raised her eyes again. “You want it straight?”

  “As straight as you can give it to me,” Jessica assured her, and braced herself.

  “Well, I know it’s none of my business.” She smiled. “But that’s what they all say when they stick their foot into someone else’s affairs. Anyway,” she went on in a careful, sober tone, “I hear you’ve been seen around with Luke Fury.”

  Jessica stiffened immediately. “Yes,” she replied shortly. “What of it?”

  “See!” Millie exclaimed, spreading her hands wide. “I’ve already made you mad.”

  Jessica sighed. “You’re right, of course. I did ask for it, didn’t I? All right, go on. I’m listening.”

  “I like you, kid,” Millie said in a low voice. “You’ve worked hard, when you really didn’t have to, minded your own business, kept the customers happy. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.” She shook her head. “Believe me, I can see the attraction. He’s a hard man to resist. But you’ll get your heart broken in the end if you count on him for anything.”

  Jessica frowned. “Are you saying he’s deceitful? A liar?”

  Millie shook her head vigorously. “No. I’m not saying that at all. I just think you’re very vulnerable where a man like Luke is concerned. I don’t know how far it’s gone between you two, but I’d be very surprised if he made you any promises, any commitment, and I’m just afraid a woman like you would expect something along those lines after things got to a certain point.” She reddened. “I’m not prying. I’m just trying to tell you that to pin Luke Fury down, you’d need a signed, sealed and notarized contract.”

  Throughout this little speech, a gnawing sensation had started up the pit of Jessica’s stomach, and with each sentence it grew more disturbing. “I see,” she said at last in a small voice. “Well, you might be right, but then you don’t really know him the way I do.”

  “That’s true,” Millie said with a wry smile. “And believe me, I would never have opened my mouth if you hadn’t forced me into it.”

  Jessica reached out and covered her friend’s hand with her own. “I know that, Millie. And I appreciate your honesty, plus the fact that you care. But I am a big girl.” She smiled crookedly. “It may not seem like it to you, but I really can take care of myself.”

  Millie rose to her feet. “Well, I’ve had my say, and now can we please forget it? I still think you’ll get burned badly...” She broke off suddenly and smiled. “But, you know, I have to admit, I can’t help envying you the experience. He’s some man.”

  She turned then walked off. When she was gone, Jessica sat there alone for a while, staring blankly out the window at the bright Florida sunshine and telling herself over and over again that Millie was wrong about Luke. She had to be.

  For the next few days she continued to see Luke as usual. Her whole world seemed to revolve around him. She was so completely and hopelessly in love with him by now that it was like an addiction she couldn’t dream of giving up.

  Still, she couldn’t quite get that conversation with Millie off her mind. It was true that Luke seemed to be totally unconcerned about the future, in fact, never even mentioned it. Before the talk with Millie, she’d been so happy just to have him in her life that it hadn’t bothered her.

  Now, however, like a worm in the core of an apple, it began to gnaw at her that he never looked beyond the next day, the next minute, even. It was the way he was, and she accepted that, but her needs had to count for something too. She had to have some kind of understanding about the future.

  There wasn’t a shadow of a doubt in her mind that he loved her. He told her often enough that he was crazy about her, even that he adored her, and he certainly proved it in a hundred different ways. But there was one word that never passed his lips, the one word she was longing to hear.

  Finally she made up her mind she’d have to raise the subject herself. They couldn’t just keep drifting on this way, as pleasant as it was. She knew he hated to be pinned down, but surely she could come up with a tactful way, one that wouldn’t alarm him.

  It was just a few days later that she saw her chance. She had cooked for him that evening, and after dinner they sat side by side on the sofa in her living room, drinking coffee and discussing what they’d each done that day.

  Finally, as she’d known he would, he reached out for her and pulled her toward him. “You know, I haven’t kissed you once today,” he said, smiling down at her and tilting her chin up to face him. “You’ve become a necessary habit, you know. I can’t even go twenty-four hours without the taste of you.”

  As his lips pressed against hers, one hand slid slowly down to cover her breast, then began to slip inside the loose opening of her blouse. For a moment she was tempted to forget her intention. He had come. to wield such tremendous power over her that she could think of nothing but his sheer physical presence dazzling her.

  Now, however, steeling herself, she put her hand on his to push it aside, then broke off the kiss and shifted her body, leaving a small distance between them.

  “Luke, I think we need to talk.”

  “Talk?” he said in a puzzled tone. “What about?”

  She gave him a direct look. “About us.”

  He grinned crookedly and reached out for her again. “What’s there to talk about?”

  “No, Luke!” she said sharply, twisting out of his grasp. “I mean it.”

  “Well, all right then,” he said, leaning back on the couch and crossing his arms over his chest. “Fire away.”

  His tone was pleasant enough, but she sensed an edge to it, an undertone of suspicion, as though he knew what was coming and was already marshaling his defenses against it.

  She searched her mind for a way to begin. “What is it you want out of life, Luke?” she asked finally.

  He reared his head back and frowned. “What do you mean?” He seemed genuinely bewildered by the question.

  “Surely you must have some long-range plans.”

  He shook his head. “No,” he said quite firmly. “I don’t. I learned the hard way that plans, hopes, wishes, whatever you want to call them, have a nasty way of backfiring. I gave all that up long ago. All that matters is right now.” Suddenly he grinned.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “Oh, I was just thinking about something I once read, that yesterday was a canceled check and tomorrow an unpaid bill. Only today is cash.”

  Although she could see some truth in that, it didn’t really apply to their situation. She took a deep breath and tried again.

  “You know how much I care about you,” she began slowly. “You can’t possibly doubt that.”

  “No,” he replied. “I can’t. I don’t.”

  “And I think you care for me.”

  “Of course I do. Haven’t I told you so often enough?”

  “Yes, you have, and I’ve been very happy with you, happier than I’ve ever been before. But I have the feeling we’re not going anywhere.”

  He narrowed his eyes at her. “Well, Jess,” he said equably. “Just where is it you want to go?”

  He sounded puzzled, but in her heart she had the sinking feeling that he knew quite well what she was leading up to and was deliberately avoiding it, playing dumb, making her do all the work.

  “Where do you want to go, Luke?” she asked quietly.

  “To tell you the truth, I’m perfectly happy with things just the way they are.”

  Of course, she thought bitterly. Why wouldn’t he be? The way they were drifting obviously satisfied him well enough. Yet, as she gazed at him now, the fine features set in a rather hard expression, the green eyes steady, the firm chin lifted slightly, her resolve failed her. Quite simply, she didn’t want to lose him.

  “All right,” she said at last, leaning toward him. “Let’s leave it at that then.”

  His arms came around her, and they sat there quietly for some moments, her head on his shoulder, his hands stroking her hair.

  �
��Jess,” he said at last.

  She twisted her head to smile up at him. “Yes?”

  “You know I want you to be happy, too.”

  She put a hand on his cheek and gazed into his eyes. “I am happy, Luke. You make me happy.”

  A look of relief passed over his face. His hold tightened around her, the dark head came down and his mouth claimed hers once again.

  And I am happy, she assured herself inwardly as she gave herself up to his kiss. It will work itself out in time.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  FROM that night on, Jessica sensed a subtle but unmistakable change in their relationship. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but there seemed to be a definite cooling off on Luke’s part.

  It was mostly little things. The flowers quit coming, and there were periods of two or three days when she didn’t see him or hear from him at all. He was still as ardent and tender as ever in his lovemaking, but at other times he seemed abstracted, as though his mind were a million miles away from her. Worst of all, she felt he was erecting a barrier between them and withholding the part of himself that she loved the most, his vulnerability.

  At first she tried to convince herself it was only her imagination, that even the most passionate affairs cooled off in time. Also, by now she was so afraid of losing him that the slightest sign of his withdrawal naturally would alarm her. Luke loved her, she knew he did, even though he shied away from the actual words, and she loved him. That was all that mattered. She kept reminding herself that love meant trusting unconditionally, and she could have cut out her tongue for raising the issue of their future at all.

  She should have known better. Luke was a man who had to do things in his own way, his own time and would strenuously resist being pressured into anything he wasn’t ready for. She would just have to be patient, that’s all.

  However, that was more easily said than done.

  One night, a few weeks after that conversation, they were just finishing up dinner at their favorite Vietnamese restaurant. Luke had seemed particularly preoccupied all evening. She’d been telling him a story about a heated argument she’d witnessed that day between a nurse and one of the doctors, when she suddenly noticed the glazed look in his eyes, the remote frown on his face, and she stopped in the middle of a sentence.