by Alexie Aaron
I did, and Dave cried with me. Dr. Andrews left the room.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t fight him off. I didn’t want to die. Why do people want to kill me? I mean, I can see cussing me out from time to time, but he wanted me dead. He was dying, and yet he wouldn’t release me. Maybe now he’ll stop haunting me.” I stopped babbling. I lifted my head and looked at Dave and asked, “Why did you want to be here?”
“It’s because I care about you, Cin. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you at the opera, or at the hospital. I’m sorry I left you in the parking lot. I don’t think I can be strong enough for you.”
“Me neither.” I got off his lap. “Kyle killed me, but I fooled him and came back.”
“Yes you did. Cin, why are you wearing your I’ve been dumped clothes?”
“Because I was dumped.”
“No you weren’t. We broke up. You weren’t dumped. I was the one dumped.”
“Like hell you were. If I dumped you, I would know it. And if I dumped you, I’d be able to take this off,” I said, pulling out the necklace.
“Here, let me help you.”
I took a step back and warned him, “Stay away from the redhead. I’m dangerous.”
He started laughing. He wiped his wet face with his sleeve. “Come on, Cin, I’m not going to take your necklace from you.” I walked over, slowly tucking the necklace back in my top.
I stood there in front of him. “You have a funny look on your face. Do you want to ask me something?” I prodded.
“Cin, what does Father Michael know that will send you to hell?”
“Lord, I can’t keep a secret if my life depended on it.”
“Tell me. I need to know.”
I sighed and rolled my shoulders before I began. “When we were in Cornwall, I accidently killed a transgender person, and then her lover tossed me down the stairs and began beating my head into the floor. He was killing me. Father Michael ran in, and even though he had been recently shot, he tackled the man. They fought on the floor. I barely had anything left, but I saw that Father Michael was losing the fight. So I took these two little knives I had hidden in my bra, and I stuck them into the man under each of his arms and pulled him off Michael like he was a bale of hay. He was in pain but also hyped up on adrenaline. He stood there and grabbed a knife with each hand. I warned him not to remove them, but he didn’t listen. He bled out. I can still see it. It was like a cape of blood coming from under each arm spreading outwards on the floor.”
“So you saved Father Michael.”
“After he saved me. But he didn’t kill anyone. I killed two people. One accidently.”
“Tony knows about this, doesn’t he?”
“Yes.”
“So that’s it. I couldn’t figure out your and Michael’s bond with each other. You killed for him.”
“I wasn’t doing anything other than saving his life,” I said, pulling my tight shirt away from my body nervously. I thought a moment. “I saved him again over at Lake Okeechobee. Seems to me, I saved Tony and you too. It’s about time you bozos step up to the plate and save me for a change.”
“You got me blown up. Does that even things out?” he asked.
“No.” I gave him the Harry O’Rourke smile. All teeth and a lot of insincerity.
La fioritura
Harry drove me home. Buslowski had stayed a little while longer, but I suspected he wanted to pursue some of the leads that had come out of my hypnosis session. So I asked him to leave. I didn’t want to cry. I just wanted to relax. I had to deal with so much today that I just needed time to sort it out. I planned on taking a bubble bath while listening to music.
“Cin, when Buslowski left the office, he wasn’t really happy,” Harry said as he pulled into the driveway.
“Leave it alone, Harry,” I warned him.
“What happened after Dr. Andrews left?” he asked, putting the top up on the car.
“Were you expecting a reconciliation of sorts?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“It’s not going to happen.”
“I don’t mean to be rude, but you two need each other. Sally said that he’s been quite a bear at work the last few days.”
“Isn’t he always a bear at work?”
“No, actually, I think he’s a nice guy. It’s you and me that used to make him cranky.”
“Imagine that.”
Harry started laughing. I couldn’t help it and joined in.
“I never got my ice cream. I’m beginning to think that the ice cream was all a lie. One of many lies,” I said, frowning.
“Hey now, he’s doing his best. He’s no me.”
I looked over at Harry and smiled. “Thank God for that.”
Harry grinned.
“Come on, help an old lady out of the car. I think I overdid it the last couple of days.”
Harry was quick to my side, and he helped me into the house. Before leaving, he even ran the bath for me.
I sat on the edge of the bed for a moment, looking at Kyle who stood there in the room. “Go away, Kyle. Find someone else to haunt. I’m done.”
He looked back at me and faded away.
~
Harry drove through the countryside. We had the top up because today the humidity was extreme. I had researched the prison and saw that I could bring a few items in with me. I brought two bottles of sixteen-year-old, single malt Lagavulin whiskey. One was for Tom, and the other was a bribe so I could give it to Tom.
The prison consisted of a dorm-like building and a few cottages at the edge of a lush garden. Some prison. I wondered if the rest of us peasants rated this kind of treatment. I doubted it. I probably would be someone’s bitch somewhere, or perhaps I would have a bitch? Either way, bitch was a definite card I would be playing if I were incarcerated.
I hadn’t heard from Dave, not that he and I had anything further to say to each other. I didn’t want him to come with us to interview Tom. The less I had to deal with him, the better.
Last night had been a good one. I had a Kyle-free night. But this morning, he stood behind me while I was primping in the mirror. I knew he was just in my mind, but damn, it wasn’t helping my sanity having him standing there dressed in his tuxedo with that horrible tie hanging loose around his neck.
I looked at my neck. The contusions had disappeared along with the ivy tattoo. My feeling the ivy tighten before the opera, was that a premonition? All I knew was that I was going to have to earn some money, because soon I would have to be paying my own shrink bills.
“You’re pretty quiet,” Harry said.
“I was thinking about finances.”
“That usually makes you quite boisterous.” He imitated my voice, “‘Harry, why do you buy such expensive hair products!’ ‘Harry, do we really need a lawn service!’”
“You’re pretty good at mimicking me. Maybe you could do sex calls on the side. ‘Hello, this is Cin. Wanna sin with me tonight? Call 555…’”
“Honestly, your voice isn’t that sexy.”
“It’s not the voice. It’s how you use it. Speaking of, how’s the gun, and have you figured out how to fire it yet?”
“I’m getting reasonably proficient. Sally is teaching me. We think you should carry one.”
“Nope, I would shoot myself in the foot. Besides, I’m not a gun fan. It’s alright for law enforcement and the military, but there are too many loons out there.”
“Speaking of loons…”
“I’m still seeing Kyle,” I said, sinking in my seat.
“I think it’s a guilty conscience.”
“Guilty? He killed me,” I growled.
“Calm down. I think a part of you wants to catch his killer, but the damaged part of you can't seem to let you use that brilliant mind of yours in order to do it.”
“Well, Dr. Freud,” I said acidly. “I’m here today on the Eldora Capella case. Why? Because you and I know damn well, my assault, Kyle’s death, and Eldora’s disappearance are somehow connected.
”
Harry smiled. I think he wanted to rile me up. Harry didn’t like meek Cin. He liked ball-busting Fin-Lathen.
Tom was waiting for us in the air-conditioned comfort of the conjugal condo. This was where, for a nominal fee, Tom could have privacy with us. I think I would have been leered at if Harry hadn’t come along. We looked more like his family than a romantic encounter.
As soon as the escort guard left, Tom ran over and picked me up as if I were a child. I was surprised but touched. He held me tight, promising that he would make all the badness go away. He set me down and reached a hand out and shook Harry’s. With the other hand, he firmly held on to mine. I have to admit, I’m still touched by his caring, considering I was one of the people who got him in this situation in the first place.
Harry set the bottle of Lagavulin down on the table. He pulled out a chair. I sat next to Tom on the couch. For a moment, none of us spoke.
“I’m sorry you’re here,” I said. “I tried to convince them you had no idea what was happening, but you had already confessed.”
Tom turned to me and looked into my eyes. “I think I knew that they were into something illegal, but I pushed it away. To think that they had a full drug operation, on the verge of selling to kids at the concerts, horrifies me. I was trying to live with my abusive wife at the time. Not that that is any excuse,” he explained.
“What are you going to do when you get out?” I asked.
“I don’t know.”
“You can live with us,” Harry offered. “Cin’s place isn’t large, but it has two free bedrooms right now. Soon a pool house.”
Tom looked over at me for confirmation.
“Sure, why not. Just warn me if you’re having Manny over. I don’t need another embarrassing song written about me.”
“Funny you should say that…”
“Don’t tell me, not today,” I begged.
Tom smiled. “I would love to take you up on your offer, but, Cin, I think you need a little distance from all the trouble I bring with me.”
“Think about it, and let us know,” I told him. “I think it would be fun to have you around.”
“Before we get sidetracked, I’d like to tell you why I called you. I saw the pictures of you two in the papers, and I was worried about Kyle. He has a bad reputation. Lots of rumors about his bullying since he was fifteen. As an agent, I wouldn’t handle him. I think his agent is Horace Muller. Anyway, I thought you looked so beautiful in the pictures, so I maliciously sent a copy to Sidney. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Actually, yes. I don’t need him getting out and finishing me off,” I said, worried. I thought about the thin handsome man I had given my post-divorce virtue to. It would have been better to have considered Sidney Stonebridge a concert hookup, but that’s not the way my heart works. I fell for him hook, line and sinker.
The night of the concert, he was just checking off a bucket list item and, later, setting me up to take the fall for the murder of Elijah’s ex-wife. There was no room for me in his murderous heart.
“Cin. I think part of him loved you. But he was in so deep that he couldn’t acknowledge it.”
I frowned and looked down.
“I’m sorry. Too soon?”
“Yes,” Harry said. “Cin’s not doing too well at the moment.”
“Of course, I’m sorry. When I read what had happened at the opening night party, I could have killed myself for not contacting you sooner. You see, I know Eldora Capella.”
“Knew Eldora,” I corrected.
“No, Cin, know. She’s alive and well and living in Europe. I personally flew her there.”
“You’re going to have to explain that,” I said.
“I will, but all of us are going to need a drink first. Harry, I believe there are glasses in the cupboard.”
Tom rose and picked up a clear plastic bag which held several newspapers. I hadn’t seen the write-ups about the opening night yet. I didn’t want to. Harry assured me that he had, and he had corrected the reporters personally about being referred to as the jilted lover. Tom drew out the picture of Kyle on his knees kissing my hand, handing it to me with a photocopy of a black and white newspaper photo of Marco D’Amore doing the same thing to Eldora Capella. She was wearing the same style of dress. I couldn’t see the ivy tattoo, but I knew it was there. She was onstage holding a bouquet of roses.
“This was during the curtain call of Carmen. A very young Marco had vaulted onto the stage and proposed to Eldora, and she had accepted him.”
“I don’t understand. Did Kyle do this to be funny?” Harry asked.
“No, he didn’t propose to me. Just kissed my hand,” I told them.
“Then he was prompted to do this. Perhaps for publicity?” Tom ventured.
“There was a proposition in his eyes, but it wasn’t marital,” I said softly. “After he escorted me off the stage, he beat me.”
Tom’s face fell. His fists clenched.
“Tell him, Cin,” Harry encouraged.
“He grabbed my alto clarinet and escorted me off the stage. I would not have gone with him, but I was worried about my instrument. He walked me into a deserted hallway. He looked mad. I wanted to stop his tantrum, so I told him that I thought the piece of music went well. He looked at me with the coldest eyes I have ever seen. He said he had seen my lover out in the audience. I thought that Dave had shown up, but he was talking about Harry.”
“Why would Harry make him so mad?”
“He wanted to date me, and I told him that I didn’t date younger men. Harry being there made me seem like a liar. He hit me as hard as…” I faltered. I could hear Dr. Andrews’s admonitions in my head about me leaving sentences unfinished and words unspoken, and I managed, “He hit me harder than Sidney did.”
Tom was visibly upset. “I didn’t know Sidney hit you.”
“He would have beat her to death if his cousin hadn’t shown up,” Harry said.
“Oh my god, I had no idea.”
“Preston covered the rising bruise and convinced me not to do anything until after the gala,” I told him quickly, so he didn’t dwell on Sidney.
“And Kyle danced with you to prove that he wasn’t capable of such an act. Your bruise was covered, and it would have been his word over yours. Diabolical,” Tom said.
“Kyle was a genius, but he wasn’t working alone,” I said. “He was too young to know about Eldora. Someone had to encourage him to do that.”
“It could have been Preston or maybe Marco,” Tom said. “Eldora didn’t want to have anything to do with either one of them after the two had a fight in her presence. I don’t believe she’s ever told either of them where she is.”
“I think Preston dressed me as Eldora to have her missing persons case re-opened. He’s trying to find her.”
“We can’t let that happen,” Tom said.
“Unfortunately, the detective in charge will find her. He’s that good, Tom.”
“Who?”
“Buslowski,” Harry filled in.
“Isn’t he implicated in Kyle’s murder?” Tom asked, looking for the article he had read.
“Yes. This makes him even more driven to find out the connection in order to clear his name. That’s kind of why we’re here,” I said.
“Kind of?” Tom questioned.
“I wanted to see you,” I admitted. “I needed to know you were alright.”
Harry looked uncomfortable and handed me a drink. “I’m going outside for some air.”
I didn’t want to put Tom on the spot. I needed Harry there to be my cooler - a person whose presence takes the sexual vibe out of the room. You see, I no longer trusted myself. I wanted Tom to make love to me.
“Whoa, O’Rourke, you’ve got the wrong idea,” I said. “I care about Tom, and I know he’s been the one pulling strings to get Alex all those front band gigs.”
Tom shook his head. “No one was supposed to know.”
“Tom, it had you written all over it,”
I said smiling. “You can’t fool me. Someone told me I was brilliant.”
Harry groaned.
“We’ll do our best not to let anyone know that Eldora Capella is alive, but, Tom, if Dave ends up in the slammer, I’m going to have to break my promise,” I said.
“I understand and agree,” Tom said.
“Can you give us any more information on these other characters?” Harry asked, handing him his list.
I let Harry and Tom work on it while I took advantage of the couch. The conversations about Kyle and Sidney had exhausted me mentally. I also had to smother the fire that was burning. I laid down and closed my eyes.
I dreamt about Kyle, no surprise there. He was standing, glaring at someone behind me. I turned around, and there stood Sidney. My heart still lurches when I think of him. Yes, I know he was evil, and yes, I know he tried to kill me, but my heart was still broken. Kyle turned again and looked in front of him. He stepped aside, and there was Dave. I tried to get to Dave, but Kyle stood between us again. I thought I would go back around and get to him another way. I turned and sidestepped around Sidney, and there stood Father Michael. It was then I knew what the dream was about. I had put Father Michael and Sidney behind me, but Kyle stood in the way of Dave and me ever really being together. “Kyle, if I find out who killed you, will you release me?” I asked. He drew me to him and said viciously in my ear, “I am the last one you’ll ever love.” He put his tie around my neck and started choking me.
“Cin, wake up!” Harry called through the fog.
I couldn’t breathe. I tried to pull Kyle’s hands off me, but they won’t budge.
I felt a sting of a light slap and opened my eyes. Tom and Harry were looking down at me.
“Oh…” I said, embarrassed. My heart was beating so hard, I was still having trouble catching my breath. I turned away from them and started to cry.
“Harry, she’s not well,” Tom said. “I didn’t recognize her when she stepped into the room. She’s thin and skittish. She reminds me of a trapped animal. Her eyes are always looking around her, looking for a place to run and hide.”