After cleaning up, I went to look for Dominick. The house was quiet. I was standing in front of the window in the kitchen, which overlooked the yard. To my surprise there was Dominick and my dad out on the lawn talking. I walked to the door, so I could join them. When I opened the door, they were shaking hands. A tear fell onto my cheek. The sight of them making peace hit me really hard. I didn’t expect this day to ever come. I knew there was so much tension between them, but I’m glad that both of them could put their differences aside and find some solid ground and mutual respect for one another. These babies were truly my little miracles.
They turned and saw me in the doorway. They looked at each other and then at me. Dominick walked over first.
“We’re okay.”He smiled and pinched my chin.
“Thank you. I know that wasn’t easy for either of you.”
“It was easier than you think. When it comes to you,we’ll do whatever it takes.”
I smiled at him and then turned to my dad who was now by my side.
“Thank you, Dad.”I was genuine.
“Sweetie, you know I’ll always want what’s best for you. Even though I have to admit I wasn’t happy with your choice in the beginning, or how you two got together. You are the happiest I’ve ever seen you, Rain. For that I am grateful to Dominick.”My dad was truly sincere.
We said goodnight to each other and headed off to bed. The day and night couldn’t have ended on a better note.
****
CHAPTER ELEVEN
GHOSTS OF THE PAST
Tuesday seemed like a busy day for everyone, but me. Raven and my dad took the opportunity to check on some of their clients. Anna and Joseph went with Mema and Antonio to pay a visit to some mutual friends. Neither couple had been aware each of them had some of the same friends here in Italy. Dominick went with Marcelo to Naples on the quest to find his real parents.
I decided to sleep in because I wasn’t feeling too well today. Maybe it was the pregnancy or maybe it was all of the excitement from the trip. Tommy was already up and on the phone with the caterers. They confirmed that could move the date and the food we chose would still be fine for the new venue, perfect.
After cleaning up, I showered and decided to go in search of the past. I went up to the third floor of our house. For all intensive purposes that floor was a glorified attic. It could really be used as a beautiful bedroom suite and sitting room if renovated, but it was neglected all of these years and only used for storage. It needed a great deal of work. Maybe now that the babies are on their way, it’s something I needed to think about. We definitely could use the additional space when visiting. I’ll bring the idea up to Dominick when he gets home.
I had brought up a blanket from downstairs because the floors were dusty. I laid it out next to the old trunk and sat down to begin my investigation. I opened the trunk and started to go through the old photos. There were of me and my mom, some of Raven, my dad, even Tommy and his family. My mom always appeared sad, lost. You would think she was the one that was stuck in the house instead of me. Well, maybe in a way she was. She was stuck with me, but that was by her own choice and her own insecurities. It took it’s toll on her from her appearance in the photos.
There were so many pictures in the trunk. She seemed to have saved them all. I found a beautiful silk scarf that I don’t recall my mother ever wearing. It was stunning. The silk glowed with crimson colored roses. It would have been amazing with my mother’s coloring. She had black hair and china doll skin. She reminded me of Elizabeth Taylor. I proceeded to pull the scarf out of the truck, but it was stuck on something. I tugged a little harder and the material released a small pocket door that I had never noticed when I first discovered the trunk. I carefully removed the scarf and reach inside the open where the secret door fell away from the inside of the trunk.
To my surprise there were packet of letters wrapped in a similar scarf. This one was orange with white roses and black trim. I was just about to untie the knot and check out the papers when Tommy called out to me.
“Rain, are you up there?”He asked.
“Yeah, I’m here. Come on up so I can show you what I found.”I answered back.
Tommy appeared in the doorway and surveyed the room.
“Man ,this place really needs to be cleaned up.”He said as he joined me on the floor.
“I know, but it’s such a great big room. So much can be done with it.”I said as I looked around.
“What’s that in your hand, baby?”He tilted his chin towards the packet of letters.
“I’m not sure. I pulled on this scarf and it released a small secret door. This is what I found inside.”I said, as I held up the wrapped envelopes.
“Are you going to open them?”
“Are you kidding? Of course,I’m going to open them. There may be some information I need to help Dominick.”I smiled at him.
“What makes you say that?”Tommy was confused.
“Well my mom knew Mr. Kane prior to her marrying my dad and Mr. Kane said that he had been in love with my mom, but when she married my dad he kept out of her way and said nothing. You can’t tell me that these letters don’t tell any of that in their pages.”
“What if they don’t?
“Then they don’t and I’m right back where I started, hoping Dominick and Marcelo will come up with the answers Dominick needs.”
“Well, what are you waiting for? Let’s have a look.”He smiled at me.
I smiled back at him and untied the scarf which held the hidden letters. I was nervous, but needed to know what they said. When I started to read the first one my face went stone cold. Tommy noticed my reaction.
“Rain, what’s wrong?”He asked cautiously.
I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I grew angrier by the second. I knew my mother was controlling, but not in a million years would I have believed she was a monster.
“Rain, what does it say?”Tommy’s voice pulled me from the words on the page.
I stared up at him, as if I was punched in the stomach. The anger grew deeper inside my body.
“Rain, what is it baby?”
“That bitch never wanted us.”My eyes stung.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“It’s all here in the first letter to Mr. Kane. She said that she got pregnant to make him jealous. To make him see what he missed out on. That she never wanted to be saddled with a child, let alone twins.”
“Rain, there must be some mistake. Your mom took very good care of you. I will agree with you that her parenting skills left a lot to be desired, but she loved you.”
“No! Tommy! She loved Mr. Kane and she married my dad to make him jealous.”I yelled.
“Rain, you said yourself that your mom accepted your dad’s proposal first. If she loved Vincent, why didn’t she just turn your dad down?”
“She stated here in the letter that she was hoping by accepting my dad’s proposal of marriage, Vincent would stop working so hard at his empire and pay more attention to her. You see, Tommy; it was always about her and her needs and what she wanted and what she couldn’t have. That bitch never loved us. We were fucking pawns. Innocent children that she gave birth to and used over and over again.”I let out a strong breath that I had been holding in.
I picked up another letter that was clearly from Mr. Kane. I was nervous about what I would discover, but there was no point in stopping now.
“What’s it say?”Tommy asked in a soft tone, so not rattle me anymore than I already was.
“It says that he won’t leave Elise for my mom. That Elise and he were trying to work on their marriage and bring up Dominick in a stable home. He tells her that she needs to stop living in the past and move forward. He also states that she should leave Italy with me and join my dad and Raven in Manhattan, that he will not leave his family for her and he will not ruin his friendship or the business with my dad, over the past.”
“When was that written, Rain?”
“Th
e date puts me and Raven at the age of 5. Dominick would have been about 10. That was just around the time that Mr. Kane found out Dominick was adopted. The time when Mr. and Mrs. Kane’s marriage exploded.”I looked at Tommy.
“Are you thinking what I thinking, baby?”I knew exactly what he was asking.
“Yeah, I bet my mother had something to do with Mr. Kane finding out about that adoption. I’m not sure how and he never stated how he found out. Just that he discovered it and then he left Elise and Dominick.”
“Shit.”
“There’s one way we can find out.”I said.
“How?”
“Let’s go through my mother’s letters and she what else Cella’s been hiding.”
Tommy grabbed my hand.“Are you sure you want to do this, Rain? You’re already angry and you’re not supposed to get upset under any circumstances.”
“Tommy, I need to know what went on back then. I’m definitely upset, but I can’t stop now.”
“Okay, Rain. Just promise me you’ll stop before it becomes too much. Please, Rain. Promise me.”Tommy pleaded with me.
“I promise, Tommy. Now let’s see what other little secrets mommy has been hiding in here.”My voice was dripping with sarcasm.
Tommy just nodded. He didn’t know what to say at this point.
Tommy and I both went through the letters. None of them proved my mother had anything to do with her discovering the adoption at all. Or telling Mr. Kane about it. She seemed like she wanted Mr. Kane to feel as miserable as she felt. She was so jealous of what Elise Kane had. She had the option to be with him, but chose my dad instead. Actually, she must have had feelings for him and probably had been with him prior to my dad.
It seemed like she wanted him to suffer or maybe she wanted him to leave his family for her. Why not just marry him from the beginning? Why go to his best friend and new business partner? Why create a life she didn’t want? She had the chance to marry Mr. Kane before she ever got involved with my dad. It’s not like she was pregnant with Raven and me. That came years later. I can’t guess what went on and I really don’t care about my mother’s feelings of loss at this point. She made her life and mine, for that matter, what it was and I can’t go back and change that. I lived under her control, but she never showed the side of her that regretted having us.
This was so unbelievable to me. Yet, it was right there in black and white. In my mother’s own words and in her own handwriting. One thing I couldn’t understand was how she got her letters back. If she mailed them to Mr. Kane, how was it that they were all here in her trunk? I didn’t have to go far to answer my own question. The envelopes had a stamp on them. They said return to sender in Italian. I’m not sure if they were opened by Mr. Kane or they were reopened by my mother once she got them back.
What I did know was that I felt so sick inside. I never really knew my mother after all. Much in the same way Dominick never knew Elise or Vincent. I was grateful that my dad loved me and that he was here for me even now. I was happy to know that my children would grow up with him. I wondered if he knew what went on. He wasn’t a stupid man, but then again he was always a very proud man and I don’t see that he would have put up with the shit that my mother had been up to. Especially, when he had found out about what she had been doing all of those years ago.
Then again she kept him working in New York and she was here every time Mr. Kane arrived in Italy, whether on business or pleasure, so maybe that long distance allowed her to live the way she wanted without him finding out. Another thing I’m curious about, was why Mr. Kane would help me in the later years to take care of my mom. He visited frequently and there never seemed to be an ill will feeling between them. Maybe the fact that she was ill was enough for him to take pity on her and let the past stay in the past.
I placed the letters back in the trunk with the scarf around them. When I went to place them back in the secret compartment, I notice a letter that had not been part of the group was sticking out of the opening where I discovered the other letters. I pulled the envelope out gently, as not to tear it and placed the others back securely where I found them.
I turned the letter over and a chill ran through my bones as I read who it was addressed to. It said“To Rain, Please Forgive Me.”
It was the same handwriting as the others. It was from my mother.
Shit. Now What?
“Rain, what is it?”Tommy took the letter from my hand and read who it was addressed to.
“She wants me to forgive her, Tommy. For what? For not wanting me and Raven? For pursuing a man she could have clearly been with, but not the way she wanted, so she played games for my entire life. Maybe for not loving my dad the way she should have. Or for keeping me confined, when I was clearly healthier than she was letting on. Really, now that she’s dead she wants fucking forgiveness from me. Forget it. I didn’t even know half of this shit that went on and now that I do, I don’t think a letter will prompt any forgiveness from me.”
“Try to calm down, Rain.”He was cautious.
“Calm down? You want me to calm down? I don’t even know what I am right now. I do know one thing though. I will never forgive her for what she did to our family. My God, Tommy, she even dragged you and your family into her nightmare. You were a little boy and you were my friend. You were stuck here with me much of the time. She could have put a stop to all of this. She was a selfish bitch. I will not calm down and I will never forgive her.”I got up, slammed the lid to the trunk closed and headed downstairs to get some air.
I grabbed my jacket and stormed out of the back door with the letter in hand. I knew exactly where I needed to go. Tommy screamed after me, I told him not to worry. I just needed to clear my head. I walked to the old vineyard. A place that had always comforted me in the past. I hoped it would help me now.
When I got there I stopped in the middle of the dried out fields and looked around. It was so quiet and so familiar. There was a dead silence. It felt like everything just stopped. It felt like someone was listening. Listening to hear what I had to say. There wasn’t anyone there. Just me, the vines and that old house that I loved so much.
I looked at the envelope that held my mother’s words. Words that were going to what, comfort me? Convince me to understand the past. In my opinion that letter would only serve to piss me off further. I shoved the letter in the back pocket of my jeans and walked to the edge of the property to take in the beauty of the waters surrounding Capri below.
The sea was strong today. The waves choppy. They displayed the many whitecaps that were peaking up on the water’s surface. The breeze that crossed my body was comforting. It carried the familiar scents that reminded me of my childhood. For a moment I was okay, but then those same scents started to turn my stomach. All that I knew from my past that was good washed away in those waves, because I had discovered the letters in my mother’s trunk. Maybe I knew more and just didn’t remember. Maybe I buried deep inside, what was right in front of me for my entire life. My mother was selfish and she didn’t care. She didn’t even want children. She pretended to be the loving, overprotective mom that I had knew.
It was all an act to get her way much of the time and it worked. No one, not even my dad seemed to want to deal with her. He let her do whatever she pleased, including live in Capri with me; while he lived in New York with Raven. He may have preferred it that way as well. The less he had to deal with her the better, I suppose. Many times when they were together it was tense. They didn’t fight or even raises their voices, but it was awkward more times than not.
Why had I not noticed how bad it really was? She never hit me or yelled at me, but she was manipulative. She knew how to make me feel guilty. The answer was simple. Being a child was why I probably hadn’t noticed. I considered myself to be in a safe place with my mom. Or maybe I just felt that everyone’s parents behaved like my mom did. I convinced myself over the years that my mom was helping me keep my condition in check. More than likely it was that I had become com
placent. It was second nature to live the way I did. My home was comfortable. There wasn’t anything that I needed back then. Everything was provided for me. I had good food, a warm bed, clothes on my back, toys to play with and a childhood friend to keep my mother’s demons from affecting me.
Well, that was then and this was now. Now I did need things. I needed more answers than I did when I first opened that stupid trunk. I needed them for me as well as for Dominick. Why didn’t my mother want us? Did she ever really love us? How do you have children and not have any feelings for them? I needed to know why she wanted me to forgive her.
I took a deep breath and walked forward towards the old house. I was cold and decided it had to be slightly warmer inside. I suppose I could have returned to my family’s home, but I wasn’t ready to go back just yet. The front door had been locked for years, but the side window had a broken latch, so I did what I always had done in the past and entered the house that way. The window was covered with wooden shutters. Many homes on Capri had these shutters to protect the windows behind them. I pushed the shutters to the side to revealed the beautiful stained glass of the window that was a familiar childhood memory for me. I opened the window as I had the shutters, hopped up on the pane and climbed in. Thank goodness Dominick wasn’t here to see me or he’d would have had a fit. The thought made me laugh. He worried way too much.
Identity: …………..People aren’t always who you believe them to be (Miss Taken Identity Series Book 2) Page 16