A Traitor's Touch

by Helen Dickson

  ‘Where?’

  ‘At Prestonpans to the east—near the coast. The main bulk of the Highland army occupy the surrounding hills.’

  ‘Does that mean you won’t be going to Perth?’

  ‘Yes. I must leave to join up with the men from Barradine. They are here in Edinburgh. I must ride with them to Charles Stuart—whom duty and honour call me to follow—while wishing there were some way I could pervert his cause that I am sworn to uphold.’

  ‘Such gallant foolishness could get you killed,’ Henrietta whispered, but she knew that she could not turn him from the course he had decided on.

  ‘I know that, but I will not turn back—I cannot,’ he added quietly. ‘I have come too far. I have no choice but to help Charles Stuart win. And to that end, as many men and arms as can possibly be summoned at Barradine will be summoned to the cause.’

  Henrietta shivered beneath the steely glint in his eyes. Setting her mouth in a stubborn line and holding her arms across her breasts, she turned her profile to him with her nose lifted in the air. ‘Even though you might fail and your life and property will be forfeit to the Crown?’

  ‘I have taken care of that. I have conveyed the estate to my brother Edward. The property will be held in trust and administered by my mother and her brother, who has proved his loyalty to King George on numerous occasions. The document is signed by me and witnessed. It is dated the first of March, 1745, before Charles Stuart launched his rebellion in Scotland and made me a traitor to the Crown.’

  ‘I congratulate you on your foresight, but should you not be killed in battle, you will be rightly branded a traitor to the king and sought, and when you are caught you will be led straight to the gallows.’

  ‘I know all that.’

  ‘And—and so you should,’ she chided.

  Hearing the catch in her voice and seeing that her eyes brimmed bright with tears, Simon caught her shoulder and turned her to face him. A strange look of reluctant sadness showed through the otherwise determined mien he always assumed.

  Unable to bear the thought of him dying, Henrietta swallowed down the lump that suddenly rose in her throat. ‘God willing there will be no battle, and if there is you will come through unscathed.’

  Chafing over his difficulty to forge ahead into the bare facts of their predicament and thereby strip Henrietta of all hope of him accompanying her to Perth, he looked away and combed his fingers through his hair in frustration. Tentatively he approached the subject. ‘Believe me when I tell you that my intentions were to see you taken to Perth and then to secure you an escort to take you to the safety of your uncle.’

  ‘An escort to take me?’ Henrietta grasped hold of his words, and when she spoke her tone was thick with emotion. ‘You should not have made plans for me. I make my own way, Simon. I thought that was understood.’ Her voice betrayed her crumbling composure. ‘I have stressed time and again that I will not become embroiled in what is happening. I have my own problems to sort out without taking on Charles Stuart. But what will happen? Will you win the day?’

  ‘This time, maybe. Though my provisions were to see you safely away by now, it cannot be done, for the threat from the English is too great. ’Tis a long and dangerous trek to Inverness for a woman alone at the best of times. Now, in the violent, self-seeking climate of the times, it would not be wise. I can neither take you to your uncle nor allow you to take yourself. There are enough raw Highlanders about to give a virtuous maid cause to worry.’

  ‘But by all intents and purposes I am a youth. Are you saying my disguise can be seen through?’

  ‘Not at all, but you make a bonny lad, Henrietta, and will stir the basest inclinations of some. You must be sensible and stay here until I return.’

  Henrietta stared at him in wonder, beginning to understand that he was afraid for her and was strangely ashamed that events had not worked out to allow for her to leave. ‘Is this the thing that eats at you, my staying, or the battle?’

  ‘I thought I had planned well enough to see you safely on your way by now,’ he confessed in a hushed whisper. ‘It pains me much to know that I’ve failed you.’

  Henrietta stared at him in disbelief. ‘Failed me? How can you say that? Without you I would not have come so far. I stand much in awe of what you have done for me. And what of Charles Stuart? You were not to know that his army was gathering at Prestonpans. There was nothing you could do.’

  ‘Yes, there was. I should have left you at Barradine—under lock and key if necessary.’

  Henrietta would have protested, but he pressed his fingers gently against her mouth to still her arguments. She blinked at the sudden wetness in her eyes as he leaned down to press his lips to her brow. His mouth found its way to hers, and a long moment passed as he kissed her, then, raising his head he clasped her close to him, as if he would draw her into himself.

  ‘We cannot remain together now. Please understand.’ The muscles flexed in his cheeks as he fought for command. ‘I’ll come to you later. I promise. You will be here, won’t you, Henrietta?’ he asked at length, watching her intently.

  She lowered her eyes for a moment, then sighed. ‘Yes. Yes, I will be here.’

  ‘I do sorrow for our parting, Henrietta.’

  ‘So do I,’ she confessed. Weak from the turbulence of her emotions, she thought her heart would break. Holding her away from him, he stepped back. She looked at him, holding her breath for what was to come. His face was as still as his body, expressionless, except for his eyes searching hers. She felt those eyes, felt them as a physical force, as powerful as a physical force, probing deep within her.

  ‘I think it is time we reached a clear understanding about what is happening between us.’

  His words confused her. This man was everything her father had been. The dangers he posed to her senses and emotions were immense, yet the physical desire she felt for him continued to ache inside her. A small insidious voice whispered a caution, reminding her that any liaison with Simon would bring her nothing but heartbreak, but another voice was whispering something else, telling her not to let the moment pass, to catch it and hold on to it. The intensity of feeling between them was evident, but not easily understood. What she did know was that now, on the eve of a battle that could remove him from her life altogether, this might be the last time they could be together like this.

  But still she hesitated, for what she was contemplating went beyond anything she had ever contemplated before. She was more frightened than she had ever been in her life and was both appalled and ashamed that she could even consider doing such a monstrous thing. But wasn’t this what she had wanted, what she had thought about ever since he had kissed her at Barradine? All she wanted was for him to hold her like that again and to kiss her into insensibility.

  As if her need had communicated itself to Simon with his eyes fastened to her lips, he said, ‘When I kissed you just now, your lips tasted as sweet on mine as I remembered.’

  ‘It’s strange that I have come so far from home to find you.’

  His eyes searched hers for evidence of her meaning, and almost hesitantly he enquired, ‘Should I take encouragement from your statement, Henrietta?’

  Gathering together all her strength, she thrust away her fears, her anguish and all thoughts of farewell. ‘I grant you leave to think what you might,’ she murmured softly. ‘Must you leave so soon?’

  Simon looked into her eyes with frightening intensity, and a long moment passed before he frowned and shook his head. ‘It’s for the best. We both know what would happen if I stayed. I don’t want you to be hurt.’

  ‘I—I won’t be—but I will if you go.’

  Her voice trembled and she looked at him. He stood there, silent, frowning still, the frown digging a deep groove above the bridge of his nose. The air between them was charged with a new kind of tension and anticipation.
Those blue eyes studied her, darkening to almost black. Henrietta knew what he was thinking. It frightened her just a little, but she did not lower her eyes. Her silence, her level gaze, said more than words. The decision was hers, she knew that, and she knew that she should let him go, now, while there was time, while there was still a choice—but she could not do that. After tonight she might never see him again. There really wasn’t any choice. She looked at him.

  He knew.

  Chapter Six

  Henrietta was nervous now, trembling inside, longing to be safe somewhere else, longing not to know the meaning of these new emotions that held her in thrall, but her step didn’t falter as she moved towards her destiny. She was destined to love this man and knew it would be futile to try to resist. She shouldn’t love him—common sense told her this was dangerous folly, but what she felt for him was too strong, too compelling, and she refused to listen. And yet, inexperienced as she was, she felt helpless, filled with longing, filled with love, not knowing how to express it.

  Simon took a deep breath and saw what was in her eyes. Tentatively she reached out and touched his hand. His chest rose as he took another deep breath, and his mouth tightened, his eyes full of indecision. She reached up and brushed a V-shaped wave from his brow. It was heavy, like silk to the touch, the hair spilling through her fingers and tumbling back into place immediately.

  She dragged her hand away, in the course of which she heightened a multitude of sensations that had already been stimulated in Simon when he had lightly kissed her. The hot blood had surged through him with all the swift and fiery intensity at the very instant his lips made contact with hers, making him achingly aware of his ravaging desire. Now, a moment after her hand was removed from his forehead, the ravenous flames still pulsed with excruciating vigour through his loins. With every fibre of his being, he was acutely aware of the elusive fragrance of Henrietta filling his head, that same fragrance which he breathed with intoxicating pleasure every time he was near her.

  Her soft bosom drew his sweeping perusal, and when he finally lifted his gaze to meet hers, he found himself staring into widened eyes filled with need. That simple act proved his undoing. Whatever noble intentions he had meant to manifest in her presence, no matter how scant they might have been, were hacked asunder as his male instincts rose up. He was a man famished for want of a woman and his hungering eyes devoured the delicious sights as if he contemplated his first meal after a lengthy fast.

  He hesitated a moment longer, then his eyes filled with tenderness, and Henrietta knew he was feeling as she did, fight it though he might. With a sudden move he slid an arm about her narrow waist and pulled her close. The faltering limits of his will were sorely strained. He knew well enough what her scantily clad form was doing to him. Yet for the life of him, he could not abandon the tantalising situation he now found himself in.

  His boldness knew no bounds as he spread a hand over the curve of her buttock and pressed her hips tightly against his loins and sought her lips. His heart was hammering so hard that Henrietta seemed to feel it beating in her own breast. She felt the shuddering of his whole body and she knew that his desires had grown beyond his power to master them.

  A knowledge only confirmed when, lifting his head briefly from the lips which he had been crushing under her own, he whispered softly, ‘A man cannot always control how his body responds to a beautiful woman. Being with you arouses longings I’ve struggled hard to suppress for a long time. I’m a man, Henrietta, subject to all the feelings and flaws of my gender. As a man I greatly enjoy having you near me. You’re soft and alluring and you graced my home like a delicate, fragrant flower that bestirs the senses. I do desire you as a woman and yet I would never force you or knowingly hurt you.’

  A soft, quavering sigh passed Henrietta’s lips. ‘I do not want us to part,’ she admitted diffidently. ‘I have the same feelings as you.’

  ‘Then don’t be ashamed of them. They are honest feelings and all part of being human. My love, I entreat you not to...’

  She placed a finger to his lips, stopping his words. ‘Don’t say it. I know there is no future for us together and I do not know what you expect from me, but this may be our only chance.’

  Losing the battle, Simon reached a hand beneath her chin, lifting her face as his own lowered. His kiss was gentle and loving, but as it lingered, their emotions turned on a different path. A slow warming began to spread through their minds and bodies, and all thoughts of Charles Stuart and what was to come were swept away as Simon lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed. He drew in a ragged breath. It was a momentous task for him to hold her naked form in his arms and remain tender and patient when his hunger for her had brought him to the brink of starvation.

  ‘Teach me how to make love to you, Simon,’ she whispered. ‘Let me know what is so pleasurable to a man. For this one night I want to be your lover, replacing all thoughts of any other you might have once cherished.’ What she was doing suddenly halted her, her breath stopping for barely a pause as she raised her gaze to the slight, questioning curve that traced the handsome lips.

  ‘Are you not afraid?’ he asked.

  Thoughtful for a moment, in the soft light Henrietta considered the question. She saw the desire gleam darkly in his eyes—she shivered. It was her first time. Never before had she wanted to do this, to make love to a man. She was so ignorant—she did not want him to despise her timidity. It was the rivulets of excitement that pulsed through her body as she stared at him that brought a soft, challenging glow to her eyes. ‘Not afraid. Curious, perhaps.’

  ‘I will be gentle,’ he said, drawing her close.

  With a beguiling smile she placed her lips softly on his, sliding both hands slowly over the wide chest, marvelling as she caressed the rugged firmness of the muscular expanse.

  Since the moment her deception had been uncovered Simon had never ceased to be amazed and fascinated by the enticing blend of innocence and boldness he had seen in the woman he now held in his arms. Each trait was wonderfully intriguing and he was never more aware of his infatuation than at this present moment, when they were about to enter the world of intimacy. Warmed and intrigued by her and accepting her touch and the warming heat in her eyes, enjoying the moment he leisurely caressed her lips with his own, eventually abandoning them for the tantalising fullness of her breasts. He caressed them with his mouth, pressing wanton kisses over their warmth.

  Henrietta’s head fell back as fires raged in the depths of her body. His hands, powerful and devilish, ran down her sides, down her legs, inciting fires in her. She moaned aloud as his hands caressed her firm breasts, tweaking the proudly jutting nipples, then proceeded with agonising slowness, to explore her body. Down past her flat stomach his hands roamed, down to the juncture of her slender legs. A pulsing heat began to throb in her loins, spreading upwards and outwards as his deft hands sought the centre of her passion.

  Fires that she had never known existed, had never before felt, flamed within her body. She thrust out her breasts to luxuriate in the hot, flicking strokes of his tongue. Her breath was wont to catch in ecstatic gasps, interrupting the quickening, shallow rhythm. She felt consumed by a pleasure that threatened to melt every fibre of her body. Never in her wildest imaginings had she guessed the height to which a lover’s touch could send her.

  Simon rolled her onto her back, leaning over her, at the same time settling her beneath him. His mouth blended with hers as his hands continued to move leisurely over her body. The sensations aroused with his kisses and the touch of his hands on her body, combined with the subtle pressure of his maleness, set Henrietta’s heart beating to a new, frantic rhythm that suffused her with an expanding warmth. A strange frenzy seized her and she cried out in fear and surprise as his manhood made its first foray against her virginity. But the pain of penetration was but a brief discomfort that she forced back as she became aware of a d
riving need to appease an insatiable hunger.

  Simon touched her lips, drinking in the glory of her, his hands cupping her buttocks, bringing her closer as he began to move. Amazement etched her flushed face as he met her stroke for stroke with vigour and the budding, blossoming pleasure in Henrietta’s loins intensified and swept her on with the promise of still greater heights to reach.

  More passion erupted within Henrietta and she arched her back to meet Simon. Their bodies, slick with sweat, adhered one to the other, and for a lingering moment, a perfect moment, she thought, a moment without end, they were one. Flinging her head back, she let him love her with all her heart, mind and body. Nothing existed for her outside this man and their love. Then he growled deep in his throat as his large surge of ardour was released.

  For a moment Henrietta seemed to glide and then her world reeled out of control as a ravishing, rapturous splendour burst upon her as a myriad of scintillating flashes of ecstasy rippled over her. For ever joined as one, they remained fused by the heat of their loins, joined by the love in their hearts.

  Limp and exhausted, a long, ragged sigh slipped from Simon’s lips as he slowly withdrew and relaxed his body against her. He kissed her soft shoulder as he felt her fingers play in his hair. He was so breathless he waited a long moment before he could speak. His head rested on her breast, and he could hear her heart beating.

  ‘Henrietta—’ he began.

  Her fingers pressed against his lips and he kissed them. ‘No,’ she said softly. ‘Don’t speak.’

  He nodded, feeling the smoothness of her ivory breast under his cheek. Rolling to the side of her, he gathered her to him, holding her close, kissing her and stroking her body as if he would never let her go. As he released her lips, his eyes gleamed into hers. Though recently sated, he could feel again an awakening deep within his loins.

  ‘Is your curiosity appeased, my love?’ he murmured at length.

  Feeling the returning heat, Henrietta moved against him, deliberately arousing him as she slid her arms around his waist and breathed softly. What they had done had been so beautiful, she wanted to cry. Never had she felt so alive, so aware of the world around her. Her entire body felt charged, as though she had been struck by lightning. And when she thought of what they had done, her face flushed with pleasure. It had been glorious, this making love. So wonderful with this man.