No Kitten Around

by RJ Blain

  “This is really for me?”

  “You’ve earned it, and I enjoyed coercing an angel for the money to pay its maker. I told the angel she had promised only the best for Reed, and to bring out his strengths, I needed to bring out yours. Only in your light does he shine. Typical human. Perhaps one day he’ll shine without any help from you. We’re not done. There’s the matter of your katana. These two were forged together from the same metal, and they are meant to stay together. Treat them well and they will treat you well.”

  The ko-naginata’s beauty stole my breath, but it lived in the shadow of the katana. Something about the blade sang from the moment Samantha freed it from its sheath, which was decorated in the same fashion as its sister weapon. Most would view the black leather wrapping the hilt as plain, but between the gaps in the grips, the fire of opal burned in the sunlight.

  The colors and the play of light over the stones matched what I’d loved about Kennedy’s first engagement ring.

  “She has been named Evening Star, a common name for a rare blade. She is not yet quenched, so tread with caution, Kennedy Young. The sword she will become is bound to the first blood she drinks and the first life she steals. Some blades develop a mind of their own, and it would not surprise me if she becomes one of them one day. She was created to serve a purpose, and that purpose is to safeguard you—and him. Above all, she best serves raised in defense of another. But should she have to fight, she will know no mercy for the cruel deserve no mercy.”

  Kennedy leaned the ko-naginata against her car and took the katana, tilting the blade so the sun shined from the polished steel. “I feel like I’m wasted on this sword,” she confessed.

  “That’s because you’re learning. Understanding you must grow into that blade is the first step to doing it justice. You have a lot of growing into that ko-naginata, too, but you’ll find it is a more forgiving weapon.”

  I had a hard time believing the Japanese battle scythe was more forgiving than the katana, but I kept my mouth shut to keep Samantha from being tempted to quench my sword in my gut.

  “If you want to get a feel for it, do so away from anything you want intact. That sword can—and will—cut through just about anything, and it’s a jealous blade. I recommend you start taking it to work with you and introduce it to your gun. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be surprised if your gun has an accident.”

  Perhaps talking to a sword would turn me into a lunatic, but I had agreed to months of training with an elf so I might survive a meeting with a devil. “The only guns I want having accidents around Kennedy are the ones pointed at her, Evening Star. Please make those have accidents. The one she has is for when assholes with guns can’t shoot her first. She’ll totally use you for the ones dumb enough to get near her. Right, Kennedy?”

  “Sounds like a plan,” she replied. “The sword won’t break my ko-naginata, will she?”

  “Only if you love her more. The ko-naginata is far more tolerant, just care for her daily and she’ll be fine. Evening Star will need more attention. You’ll be fine.”

  “Reed?” Kennedy’s tone warned me I’d done something to earn her ire again. Between her stunned face and the brief moments I risked a glance at her eyes, I determined she was stuck between shocked and ready to pounce me. I couldn’t tell if she wanted to take me to bed or beat me for putting her in an awkward position.

  Either way, I won.

  I couldn’t stop my smile. “I’m not sorry I coerced an angel into paying for a possibly sentient sword out to save your life. I am sorry you weren’t warned first, but I have to admit, your expression is pretty magnificent.”

  “He’s smitten. Ignore him,” Samantha ordered. “Attention to me, Reed. First, I am pleased to announce the price tag of this sword was sufficient to make the angel you call Luna weep. I could hear it in her voice. She’ll have a lot of explaining to do to her Almighty, but a debt is a debt, and He would not intentionally turn one of His angels into a liar and trigger her downfall without good reason. Of course, after this, he might not prevent her from falling into a devil’s trap, but should a devil be gunning for the angel, he’ll face disappointment.”

  “What?”

  Samantha snorted, retrieving a black-wrapped bundle from the bed of her truck. “For someone so smart, you’re sometimes quite dense. Do you really think a devil would have any actual interest in you, a human? No. He only has interest in the consequences of his games with you. His target is probably one of the angels you associate with, and my bets are on the one who paid for this weapon. Her ego is worse than mine, and it’s been over a hundred years since I’ve had a chance to say that. Angels fall, their portfolios dissipate, and a new angel is born who picks up their mantle. It’s the same thing that happens to devils when they cross their maker. The devil takes the seed and makes a new, better devil out of it. Demons are different, but that’s no big deal. They die and a new demon is born. The rules of that game never change. And they won’t until the End of Days.”

  I wrinkled my nose at the thought of the world ending due to the battle between good and evil, law and chaos, and everything else that encompassed the Christian religion’s apocalypse. I still wasn’t sure why the Christian religion’s doomsday scenario trumped the others, though I expected when shit went down, everything would end and all religions and their pantheons would find some way to make a mess of Earth. “Are you trying to tell me so much happened because a devil with ambition wants to knock Luna down a few pegs?”

  “Essentially, yes.”

  I clacked my teeth. “Is there a reason I can’t kill that devil?”

  “Enjoy yourself. Trust me on this one, don’t eat devils or angels. They taste bad and would give you indigestion. I expect, if that devil’s plan is to make the angel fall to attempt to trigger the End of Days, you will be forced to kill the fallen angel first. Do not hesitate. Once fallen, an angel will attempt to regain its lost divinity. Humans all contain a hint of divinity. Innocents would be slaughtered for their essence. The being you knew will be utterly destroyed upon falling. Until the fallen angel is slain, their seed of life will remain rogue, unable to be replanted. That would, technically, unbalance the heavens and the devil’s many hells. It wouldn’t do so in a way capable of triggering the End of Days, but the imbalance would exist until the angel’s seed can be reclaimed by the Almighty.”

  My mouth dropped open. “Let me see if I understand this correctly. Luna probably wants to build me up so she can console herself having a fair fight when she kills me. I still don’t understand why she wants me dead.”

  “You’re part elf. You’re part angel. You’re part demon. You’re part human. You’re the embodiment of all things good and evil. You’re also the embodiment of law and order. But you’re also a wild card—something a little more and less than any one of these things. Had you been a different breed of elf, everything would be different.”

  “But why?”

  “Your kind lived to devour the world. That’s why. Most cultures have some form of monster who is destined to devour the world. Perhaps she thought you one of those. You did name your feline Kitten, Destroyer of Worlds.”

  “Leave Kitten, Destroyer of Worlds out of this. Also, when I go to the charity gala that damned devil insists I attend to ‘finalize negotiations’ with him, would you watch our pets?”

  “While I will watch them for you, they will go with us.”

  Had I possessed a single scrap of sense, I would’ve run for the hills. Instead, my stomach took up residence in my feet and I sighed. “You got a ticket to the gala, didn’t you?”

  “Of course. It will be my honor and pleasure to watch the world meet my student for the first time. I will keep your animals out of trouble while you two wage your war, but it is best they come. Think of it this way. No one would dare tell me I can’t bring a cat and a dog into a charity event. Elves have long memories and deeper pockets.”

  “You’re going to bribe the charity to let them in.”

  “That
does make things easier on me. The charity will be most appreciative, and no one will look twice at the number or type of animals once you show off your permit. Enough play. This is your sword, and I think you’ll find him eager for any task you give him. He’ll be a more forgiving blade than Evening Star, but I think you’ll find his determination unmatched. Like you, I expect he’ll have a sense of humor.”

  “When should we expect the swords to start giving us orders?”

  Samantha laughed. “You’ll be bones long before they learn to speak, alas. It’s a pity you mortal types are, well, mortal. In time, they’ll find their voices.”

  Truth.

  I found it humbling to own a blade whose consciousness would endure long after my death. I sat on the tailgate, took the cloth-wrapped weapon from Samantha, and unwrapped it.

  If I were to judge the weapon from its sheath, my blade loitered among the lowest of the low. The sheath existed for one purpose: function. A dark stone decorated the blades pommel. “What is this stone?” I touched it, marveling at its smoothness and wondering how it remained affixed to the rest of the hilt.

  “It’s a diamond. When you quench the blade, it will gain its true color. That is elven magic at work. Everything you are, everything you have been, and everything you will be will color the stone. The sword will understand your heart better than even you, and when the deed is done, so will the diamond.”

  “It looks like it will fall off,” I admitted.

  “It can. Cup it in your hand and pull. Don’t worry, you won’t break it. It’s best if it gets to know you.”

  While puzzled, I obeyed. The stone popped off and landed in my palm, and its warmth startled me even more than the faint gleam in its center. I rolled it between my hands, and its smooth surface glinted in the sunlight. “This counts as one of the stranger things I’ve done in my life.”

  “I find that somewhat sad and rather amusing. Have you forgotten you rescued a cat and named her Kitten, Destroyer of Worlds?”

  “That’s what cats do. They take over worlds so they can destroy them at their leisure. If they weren’t more interested in taking naps and enslaving innocent humans like me, they’d probably do it.”

  “You have more problems than I can help you with.”

  “Did it really take you half a year to figure that out?” I stared at the hilt and then at the stone. “How do I put it back?”

  “Think of it like a very strong magnet that’ll only deactivate when you use it.”

  “Only me?”

  “Only you. Did you think those ambushes were because I enjoy seeing you naked? No, Reed. The times you didn’t bolt upright, I was attuning the stone to you. In good news, you got harder and harder to catch asleep.”

  “Kennedy,” I complained.

  “Don’t you Kennedy me! Most of the time, I had no idea she’d snuck into bed with us, either. The first time she did it, she held a dagger to my throat and told me to keep quiet. I learned to just let the psychotic elf do what she wants.”

  “I was hoping he’d wake up, notice, and snap like a little twig while I was attuning the stone to him. The stone would’ve noticed his determination to protect you and acted accordingly. I think it still figured it out, though. I had a difficult time coaxing him into letting you go long enough to start the attuning process.”

  “This entire conversation is confusing me,” I admitted.

  “You’re just not sure what to think about having an ancient woman crawling into your bed without you knowing about it so you can be magically bound to a rock.”

  As I had a feeling I wasn’t equipped or ready for the conversation to continue any further, I placed the orb to the sword, and it snapped back into place with a click. “So, Kennedy should sleep near Evening Star, and I should probably tuck this under my pillow. Is that where we’re standing right now?”

  “I love it when the humans figure things out on their own. Unsheathe your blade and stop your whining. I swear, you’re worse than a child today.”

  I did as told. Like Kennedy’s weapons, a faint rippling in the metal patterned the blade, and while the same length as the one I’d used with Kennedy, it was lighter than I expected. “I see you used the same trick on me with the weight.”

  “Not exactly. This one has been forged in a unique way. Don’t ask where I got the diamond; some secrets are best left undisturbed. I will tell you this much: he is relieved to see the sun and be wielded by someone with integrity. The metal is an alloy created from a meteorite and forged in the hottest fires hell has to offer, a perfect pairing for a mixed breed like yourself. To round things out, we even borrowed a few human techniques to go into the elven craftsmanship. This weapon will serve you well, and it’ll serve your children well, and it’ll serve their children well, too. When it comes to a sword, I’m not often wrong, but I think this one will see this world to the end of its days, a true pride of my people—and yours, for all you’re an echo of what they once were.”

  When I’d made a bargain with an angel, I hadn’t thought it would come with the weight of expectations, but as far as Samantha’s hopes for me went, they were far better than Luna’s.

  She wanted me to win.

  “What is his name?”

  “Redemption. However cliché that may be, if the shoe fits, wear it. You’ll wear it well, and that’s all that matters. Fight well, both of you. Tomorrow, I will teach you everything you need to know about fighting angels and devils while your bodies rest and recover. Training is over. Congratulations. You survived.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  The rings Samantha had selected burned a hole in my pocket; she’d slipped them to me after bequeathing me with Redemption. I wondered about that.

  I thought the rings deserved the name as much as the sword did.

  Both rings sparkled, and as I’d hoped, they had a low profile without sacrificing the presence of gems, which caught in the light and released a cascade of rainbows. Clear stones took center stage, but they were flanked with red and gold stones. Tiny braids of silvery metal weaved around a band of gold. Something about the design led me to believe hidden meanings lurked in the patterns, but I couldn’t guess what they were.

  Like Kennedy, I believed the rings to be perfectly complicated.

  The only thing separating the marriage and engagement band was size; the wedding band nestled against the engagement band, and they were meant to be together.

  I liked to think Kennedy and I were meant to be together, too.

  I just needed to give it to her, and since the elf had left for the day, I knew I wouldn’t have any other respite before the charity event where I’d face a devil—and probably an angel, too. I regretted my inability to identify the connections between Luna and Lucavier, but I’d do what I could to protect the future I wanted.

  I waited for Samantha to leave in her truck while Kennedy and I watched.

  Kennedy’s eyes widened. “She really left.”

  “So it seems.” I worried Samantha would return to torment us and hoped the elf had gotten the right size. “Kennedy?”

  “What is it?”

  After dealing with me and my cursed sight for so long, she didn’t turn to face me although I caught her glancing out of the corner of her eye. It gave me the opening I needed. With one hand, I palmed the ring box, keeping it open so the snap wouldn’t draw her attention to it too early. With my other hand, I cupped her chin and turned her head to face me.

  I wasn’t sure which one of us was more surprised: her for looking me in the eyes, or me for seeing nothing when I looked into hers. It wasn’t the blank slate I expected, but rather the lack of desire for anything beyond what she already had.

  Kennedy clapped her hands over her eyes. “Reed!”

  “I did that on purpose, in case it wasn’t obvious.”

  She peeked between her fingers. “But what if you see something you don’t like?”

  “If I wasn’t ready to accept whatever I saw, I wouldn’t have looked.” As I�
�d already made a mess of it anyway, I took hold of her hand, pulled it down until I could dump the ring box into her palm, and closed her fingers around it. “I let an elf beat me daily to get you this.”

  Kennedy lowered her hand so she could stare at the ring box. “You cut a deal with Samantha to get me a ring?”

  Was it too late to run into the cabin and hide with my therapy cat, who was likely enjoying a nap with her canine companion? “Of the engagement variety.” I hesitated, joining her in a staring contest with a band of metals decorated with gemstones. “Samantha would’ve literally killed me if I tried to sneak off to get you a ring so I told her I’d cooperate but she had to get the ring, and she said something about hitting her to get the ring, but since I couldn’t hit her, I bit her instead, and I’m really not sure how I didn’t die, but here we are.”

  I recognized I babbled, and my face flushed.

  “You bit her because you couldn’t hit her, but you were trying to hit her because you wanted to get me an engagement ring?”

  “When phrased like that, I sound like a lunatic.”

  “You bit an elf to get me an engagement ring.”

  The first time I’d asked her to marry me, I’d opened with the big question, and my detour from the expected left me wondering if I’d made yet another mistake. “That wasn’t my smartest move. I’m still not sure how I survived.”

  “Reed, what did you see in my eyes?”

  I flinched at her question but forced myself to take a deep breath. I’d never blame her for wanting to know, and to move on, I needed to accept everything I had seen because I hadn’t seen anything at all. “I didn’t see anything. You already have everything you want.”

  Her smile robbed me of breath. “That’s right. I have everything I want. You, me, this ridiculous cabin in the woods I can’t wait to escape from, and a psychotic elf of a teacher fighting to keep you alive so we can grow old together with our equally psychotic pets.”