Fear to Tread

by Lucy Blue

  “I’m not an angel.” She leaned closer, looking at his face. “I know you.”

  “You don’t,” he insisted.” “Swear to Christ.” He screamed, clutching at the sword. “Just pull it out!”

  “You attacked me on the street.” The sword was glowing blue, soft as moonlight. “You were one of the ones who tried to kill me.”

  “No,” he insisted, tears running down his cheeks. “We didn’t mean to kill nobody, not you or your boyfriend with the sword. Just play with you a little bit, I swear.” He grabbed her wrist, tight at first, then gentling his hold. “But you and me, we’re the dead ones now, right?” He had beautiful brown eyes fringed with long, dark lashes—an innocent’s eyes. “We got to stick together.”

  She looked back at Caleb, still standing where she’d left him, arms crossed on his chest, looking like a statue in a church. The dog had raised his haunches and dropped his snout to the ground between his paws. When he saw her looking at him, he whined, digging at the grass, obviously distressed. But Caleb was just watching.

  She turned back to the man on the ground. “Say you forgive him,” she said. “Say you forgive the angel who killed you.”

  “Fuck that,” he said, his mouth twisting in a snarl.

  “Forgive him, and I’ll forgive you. Say it and mean it,” she said, standing up. “Or I’m leaving.”

  “No! Shit…” He was whimpering now. “Okay…I forgive him.”

  She put both hands on the hilt of the sword, and a shiver passed through her like swallowing a sip of ice water on the hottest summer day. “You mean it?”

  “I mean it, shit.” He gasped for breath, reaching up to take hold of her wrist again, an almost loving gesture. “Just do it.”

  “Okay then,” she said. “I forgive you.”

  The dog howled, his whole body shuddering with the effort, and Caleb looked at him as if he was waking up from a trance. “Laura,” he said, moving forward. “Laura, don’t.”

  Laura drew the sword out, shocked by how easy it was. She did it one-handed, leaving her other wrist in the suffering creature’s grip. Light poured outward from the sword, bright white now, and it shuddered in her hand. She heard a sound like rushing wind, and her heart was pounding fast. Caleb was coming toward her, running, but the ground was playing tricks again; the distance between them kept expanding. He was saying something, but she couldn’t hear him. She read his lips, “Don’t drop it!”

  The creature on the ground was crying, saying something she couldn’t hear, kissing the back of her hand. Suddenly his eyes widened, showing their whites all around. He opened his mouth to say something else, and his head split open, exploding with blood. She screamed as his whole body split down the middle like a chrysalis, falling away from something else, something horrible. It emerged from the ruined belly, sleek and wet and dark, much bigger than its host. The horned head looked up, and Laura’s scream rose another notch. She tried to run, but the thing still held her wrist, the thick fingers splitting through the dead soul’s skin like an ill-fitting glove. The face was like Caleb’s, but twisted and animal, the sensual curve of the mouth stretched wide over long, curving fangs, exposing the red, lolling tongue of a wolf.

  “Thanks, Laura,” he said, the voice thick and deep and horribly familiar. His skin was dark and scaly, a pearly bluish silver on his face and down his chest and stomach, thickening to black across his shoulders and down his arms and legs. The fingers wrapped around her wrist were tipped with glistening black talons. “Now give me the sword.” As he straightened up, he towered over her, and huge, black, leathery wings unfolded from his back. His breath fell on her face like the draft from a furnace, and with every breath he took, his black scales seemed to burn like embers, edged with blue-hot light.

  She tried to say no, but she couldn’t find her voice. Instead, she raised the sword and brought the blade down as hard as she could on the arm that held her fast.

  Caleb surged forward. Lucifer’s concentration that had held him back had been broken by Laura’s stroke. He caught the sword in one hand just as the impact of her blow knocked it from her grip, catching her in his other arm as she fell. She screamed as the demon’s black blood spattered across her face, but he couldn’t stop to see if she was hurt. “Get back!” he shouted, shoving her away from him. She stumbled, stepping on the hem of her nightgown, but she managed to scramble clear, the demon’s talons swiping the air just over her head as he turned. “Run!” Caleb ordered, his palms burning, seared to the holy sword’s hilt as he grasped it. He wasn’t worthy any more; it wasn’t his. “Run for the gate!”

  He couldn’t look back to see if she obeyed. Lucifer’s sword of iron was swinging toward his head. He parried clumsily; the holy sword that had always been like an extension of his arm and will was now fighting against him. Dropping into a roll, he struck at his opponent’s legs, slashing at his hamstrings, but it was like swinging a club. “Not quite how you pictured it, is it, brother?” Lucifer said, his voice a rasping hiss. “Fighting me at last?”

  “You’re right,” Caleb said, leaping back to his feet, his eyes locked to his opponent’s sword. “I’m very disappointed.” The iron blade went up, and he thrust his own blade forward, stabbing it deep into the demon’s hide at the crease at the top of his thigh, the most painful blow he could manage. Lucifer’s sword caught him squarely in the chest, slashing through his armor to open the flesh underneath.

  “Oo, that’s got to sting,” the demon said, barely limping as Caleb staggered to his knees, heart’s blood pouring from his breast. “What are you doing, brother? Distracting me while she escapes?” He laughed as Caleb struggled back to his feet, still clutching the holy sword. “Where do you think she can go?”

  Laura stopped halfway across the field and looked back. The gate hadn’t moved again; she knew she could reach it at a sprint if she kept going. The dog was running at her heels; when she stopped, it yipped and whined, urging her forward. But when she looked back, Caleb had fallen to his knees. The demon was looming over him, raising a heavy, jagged, black sword that burned with unholy fire. How could she just run away?

  “Laura!” She heard her name and turned back toward the gate, her heart skipping a beat. “Baby girl, come on!” Jake was standing on the other side.

  “Jake!” She ran as hard and as fast as she could, flying over the broken ground, oblivious to the jagged stones that cut her feet. She slammed headlong into the iron bars, mindless of the pain, reaching for her husband, hugging him through the gate. “Baby, I missed you so much.”

  He was kissing her, reaching through the gate to clutch at her the same way she was clinging to him. The dog was panting, trying to jump up in spite of his pitiful state. “Laura, honey, you’ve got to come through,” Jake said. “You don’t have much time.”

  She pushed at the gate, but it wouldn’t budge. The chain barely rattled. The heavy lock looked rusted shut. “I can’t.”

  “You can,” he promised. He took a step back, out of her reach. “Come on, honey, try.” Behind him was a hillside with a narrow, winding road, and halfway up she saw her mother standing with another man she didn’t recognize. She ran her hands over the lock, looking for some kind of trigger or latch.

  “I can’t,” she said, starting to cry. “There’s no way to open it.” She didn’t deserve to pass through. She deserved to be in hell.

  “Baby girl, listen to me.” Jake reached through the bars to frame her face in his hands. “Nothing is over.” He looked just the same as he always had, shaggy-haired and bearded, his clothes splattered with paint. “Nothing has been decided.”

  She looked into his eyes. So many times he had asked her to trust him, had promised her everything would be all right, and she had always believed him. And almost every time, he had been right. Every time but one. “I made you go to hell,” she said.

  “Bullshit.” He smiled, shaking his head. “You couldn’t have even if you’d wanted to. I’m the only one who could send me to hell.” He s
tepped back again. Her mother was hiding her face in the stranger’s shoulder. He was holding her tight in his arms. “And you’re the only one who can open that gate.”

  She took hold of the bars. The stranger smiled at her and nodded. Looking back into her husband’s eyes, she pushed….

  The chain broke apart, falling with a rattle to the ground. The gate swung open.

  The dog ran through, barking his painful bark. He rubbed once against Jake’s legs before shambling up the hillside. The stranger let go of her mother to meet him halfway, falling to his knees to catch the dog up in his arms.

  “Come on,” Jake said, reaching for her, but she took a step back. “Laura, honey, come on, quick.”

  “Wait.” She looked back at Caleb who was still fighting the demon. He was staggering, bleeding, obviously hurt. But he was still fighting back. “Do something for me, baby,” she said, turning back to her husband. “Hold this open for me one more minute.”

  His sweet, crooked smile broke her heart. “One more minute.” He grabbed the gate, and she heard a hiss, like touching a hot iron. “Don’t make me come in there after you,” he said, barely wincing.

  “Don’t you dare!”

  “Then hurry up.”

  Caleb felt the change as soon as the gate swung open. A rush of sweeter air filled his lungs. He had been wrong. Laura was safe. Without looking back, he sheathed the holy sword that no longer obeyed him and grabbed hold of Lucifer’s sword arm with his bare hands. With nothing left to lose, he snarled the words of pain and destruction he had been taught but forbidden to utter, soft but lethal enough to freeze the demon’s arm in holy fire. Lucifer roared with pain and fury as Caleb wrenched the iron sword from his grip.

  “Yes!” the demon crowed. He gnashed his teeth like a maddened beast, lunging for Caleb’s throat. Caleb fell back, the two of them rolling end over end, Caleb slashing at the creature’s hide with the sword, the demon tearing him apart with fangs and claws. The sword of hell felt natural in his hands; it wanted him to wield it.

  “She’s free,” Caleb said, driving the jagged blade deep into the demon’s belly. “You’ve lost her.”

  “Who wants her?” the demon said, gasping and laughing at once. “Oh, that’s right. You do.” He swiped at Caleb’s shoulder with his talons, opening the flesh to the bone. “Take heart,” he said, his tongue lapping at the jet of angel’s blood before he shoved Caleb face first to the ground. “She hasn’t left you yet.”

  Caleb climbed back to his knees, still clutching the sword. He risked a look back and saw Laura running toward him. “Laura, no!” Her nightgown had shrunk to her own size, and the haunted look was gone from her eyes. But her feet were still bare and bleeding; her face was still splattered with blood.

  Lucifer punched him in the jaw, knocking him backwards. “Let her come if she wants,” he said, bent over, holding his slashed gut with one hand. “You’ll need something down here to play with.”

  Caleb heaved himself up from the ground, swinging the cursed sword in a wide arc over his head. He slashed across the demon’s throat, a spray of burning blood bathing them both. “Laura, go back!” he ordered, advancing as the demon fell.

  “Will you destroy me, brother?” Lucifer rasped, his forked tail snaking restlessly, digging deep ruts in the dirt. “Will you take my place in hell?”

  “Caleb!” Laura was shouting behind him. “Come with me! The gate is open, but we have to go now!”

  “They will only cast you out again,” Lucifer said. “Rule or serve in hell, my brother.” His burning eyes looked almost human, the eyes of the angel he had loved. “You will never have this choice again.”

  “Caleb, please!” Looking back, he saw Laura was sobbing, tears for him streaming down her face. “Come on!”

  He raised the iron sword, and the demon smiled. “The words to send me to oblivion,” he said. “Don’t forget the words.”

  Caleb brought the blade down silently, plunging it through the demon’s gut, not his heart, pinning him tight to the ground.

  “No!” Lucifer screamed, writhing in fury. Caleb let go of the sword and turned his back on him.

  “Caleb, look out!” Laura shouted. The demon’s tail whipped out, slashing down the angel’s back, barely missing slicing off his wings. Caleb roared with pain, and Laura started to run toward him again.

  “No!” he said, waving her off as he staggered but kept moving. “Go; I’m right behind you.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two—The Road

  As soon as Laura passed through the gateway, Jake scooped her up in his arms, sweeping her off her feet. Giving Caleb the briefest of smiles, he carried her up the hill toward the others. She draped her arms around his neck and lay her head down on his shoulder without looking back, looking utterly exhausted and utterly content. This was what she had wanted all along, and it was something Caleb couldn’t give.

  Taking a deep, shuddering breath, braced to be flung backward into the darkest pit of hell, Caleb walked through the gate.

  He heard it swing shut behind him with a long, slow scream of rusted metal. Turning around, he found the gate, the fence, and everything beyond it had disappeared. He was standing on a road that wound down the hillside into a wooded valley. Laura’s vision of hell was gone.

  Laura didn’t even see it happen. She rubbed her cheek against the soft flannel of Jake’s shirt, her arms still draped around his neck. “I love you,” she said softly in his ear.

  He squeezed her tighter, “I love you, too.” He kissed her softly on the mouth. “We need to hurry, though. Your mama wants to see you.”

  Caleb saw the Judge standing at the crest of the hill. He was smiling. The dog who had followed Laura out of the dark lands was sitting on his haunches beside him, and his wounds were healed. An older woman who must have been Laura’s mother was running down the hill to meet Laura and Jake, and she gathered them both in a hug.

  The dog barked once and ran to meet Caleb, wagging his tail. As he reached the little group of human souls, Laura’s mother turned to him and smiled. “You did great,” she said. She was lovely with long, snow-white hair and eyes just like Laura’s.

  He smiled back. “Thanks.” Just above them, another figure had joined the Judge, this one shining with light—Michael had come.

  “Go ahead,” Laura’s mother urged. “It will be all right.” Laura was still wrapped in her husband’s arms, her face hidden against his shoulder as he whispered something in her ear. Her mother saw Caleb watching, and her smile turned sad with understanding. “Angel, they’re waiting.”

  Laura barely heard her mother speaking; she was listening to Jake. “You can’t keep thinking the whole fucking world is up to you to fix,” he was saying, holding her fiercely tight. “Promise me you’ll quit blaming yourself for everything.”

  “I’ll try,” she said. “I promise.” She would promise him anything as long as he didn’t let go. “I finished your painting.”

  “Good.” He kissed her forehead. “I know I scared you half to death the night I tried to fix it. But I had to try.” He drew back to look down into her eyes. “I saw your angel coming.” He caressed her cheek, and she hiccupped, both of them laughing through tears. “I knew he was going to show up.”

  Laura hugged him tight. Looking over his shoulder, she saw Caleb reach the crest of the hill. The stranger she’d seen with Mama was still there, and another man was standing beside him—no, another angel. He came forward to meet Caleb and caught him in a hug.

  As soon as Michael embraced him, Caleb felt his legs turn weak, all his wounds attacking him at once. The Judge caught him, too, and the two of them lowered him gently to the ground.

  “I’m sorry,” Caleb said. He couldn’t look the Judge in the eye, so he looked at Michael instead. His commander was smiling.

  “You chose to fall,” the Judge said. “I’ve been there.” He laid a hand on Caleb’s head, and warmth spread through him; he could feel himself healing, body and heart.

  Down th
e hillside, Laura let go of Jake for a moment to hug her mother. “Mama, I’m so sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean it.”

  “Hush now, silly girl,” her mama said, squeezing her tight. She still smelled like white soap and rosewater perfume. “Of course you didn’t.”

  “I always knew you were telling the truth,” Laura said. “I never thought you were crazy.”

  “You think I didn’t know that?” her mother said. “Poor little girl, thinking for the whole wide world.” Laura laughed through a sob, and her mother hugged her tighter. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, my baby,” she said. “The world’s not so hard as you think.”

  The stranger called down to her mother. “Rowena, it’s time.” Caleb was sitting on the ground, but he seemed to be okay. The other angel was smiling.

  “I have to go now,” her mama said. She framed Laura’s face in her hands. “Oh, I could just eat you up.” She kissed her on both cheeks. “You take care, honey. I’ll be seeing you again.”

  “Bye, Mama.” She watched her mother climb the hill and take the stranger’s hand, then the two of them disappeared over the hill together.

  “She’s fine,” Jake promised. “She’s happy now she knows you’re safe.”

  As the Judge disappeared in the distance with Laura’s mother, headed for the plains of Light, Caleb climbed to his feet. “Laura committed suicide,” he said.

  “She did,” Michael said. “The Word is a complicated thing—even you and I don’t know all the rules.” He grinned. “Good thing for you, too.”

  “I killed a mortal,” Caleb said.

  “You didn’t know he was a mortal,” Michael answered. “And your friend saved him as he much as he could be saved. He’ll get another chance, I think.”

  “So that’s it?” Caleb said. “Not that I’m complaining, but shouldn’t I be punished?”

  “You have to go back to the earthly plane without your sword knowing what you know now. Human pain, human hunger.” He looked past Caleb to where Laura stood with her husband. “Human love. Isn’t that punishment enough?”