by Lori Foster
Honor had sensitive breasts, and if he didn’t care so much for her, he could probably easily coax her into morning sex.
But he did care, and he’d never been a man ruled by his libido.
After last night, he felt closer to her, more involved, far more protective. Seeing her like this, so sweetly vulnerable, did insane things to him.
For another half an hour he watched her sleep, until the sun finally brightened the room enough to disturb her. She didn’t ease awake. No, she came to with a jolt, her eyes flaring open, her body jerking.
“Hey,” he murmured, soothing her with a stroke, giving in to the urge to kiss her.
She cleared her throat. “Hi.” Her gaze traveled over him. “You’re awake.”
“Yes.”
“And you’re naked.”
“You, too.” He tugged the coverlet a little lower, until both breasts showed.
Pushing up to her elbows, Honor looked down at herself with surprise. “Um...”
Seeing her flushed cheeks, he asked, “Would you like coffee?”
“Yes. But I can make it,” she said as she tugged up the coverlet. “If you’ll just...” She looked at him expectantly.
He propped his head on a fist and asked, “What?” even though he knew exactly what she meant.
“I need to get up.”
He was already up, but she definitely didn’t want his lust right now. She was horrified enough by the situation, which reminded him that while Honor was open and honest about sex, she wasn’t very experienced. Two years. He still had a hard time wrapping his brain around that. “I can make coffee.”
“But—”
“It’s not a hardship.” Leaning over her, he put a warm, soft smooch on her parted lips, then tossed back the coverlet and stood.
Knowing she stared at his body, he stretched.
“You’re hard.”
So observant. Resisting a smile, he shrugged. “Yup. Happens in the morning, especially when I wake up next to a very sexy woman.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Who?” When he grinned, she shook her head and said, “I mean, besides me.” As soon as she thought about that she clarified, “Not that I think I’m sexy—”
Jason pulled on his boxers. “You’re the sexiest, and no one before you matters right now.” Let her take that however she wanted.
“Give me two minutes in the bathroom,” he said, “then take whatever time you need. I’ll be in the kitchen.”
She took fifteen minutes. When she finally showed herself, she’d brushed her hair, was dressed in pajama pants and a big T-shirt and looked to be in an agony of embarrassment.
Jason, who’d since retrieved his shorts, pulled out a chair for her. As she sat he put a cup of coffee in front of her.
In a too careful, too precise way, she placed her cell phone on the table.
Thinking of her grandfather and the responsibilities she’d taken on, he figured she’d always had that phone on hand. Along the way, someone should have spelled her, given her an extended break—if not a whole vacation, at least a weekend.
Or hell, a day.
Watching her, feeling her uneasiness, he said, “I already put in a little cream and sugar.”
Avoiding his gaze, she used both hands and lifted the cup to sip. “Good. Thank you.”
He could guess at the reason she looked so tortured, but he wasn’t quite sure how to make her feel better. Pulling out his own chair, he sat. “I’m glad you called last night.”
A cautious smile came and went on her soft mouth. “Me, too.”
At least she admitted that much. “I’d like to stay again tonight.”
Her gaze flashed to his.
Screw it, he thought, and set aside his coffee to take her hand. “You’re rightfully sad. Any caring person would be. When my mother died, I thought I’d die right along with her. When Meg died, Colt looked like someone had ripped his world away. You’re allowed to feel, honey. It’s expected and it doesn’t make you weak.”
She looked down at the table. “What we did...what I wanted you to do to make me feel better—”
“What?” Damn it, he didn’t want her to feel bad about it. “You feel guilty?”
Biting her lip, she nodded. “And a little ashamed.”
Well, fuck. That almost pissed him off, especially since the night had seemed very special to him. Guilt and shame had no place in it.
“We all cope in whatever way works best for us.” It wasn’t the same, but... “When my mom died, I drove like a maniac down an old road, pedal to the floor, sort of daring fate to take me.”
Her hand gripped his. “Jason.”
“But I’m still here—and thank God I didn’t end up hurting anyone else. It was a stupid, thoughtless thing to do.”
She watched him with worry.
“I didn’t hurt anyone with my driving, but I also jumped in the sack with half a dozen different girls.”
Her eyes widened.
Realizing what she thought, he shook his head. “One at a time, Honor.”
“Oh.”
“Night after night. It wasn’t nice of me, because the girls liked me and I knew I wasn’t interested.” He hated to admit it, but for Honor, he did. “I used them. In comparison, you taking a little comfort from a person who cares for you doesn’t seem like such a bad idea to me.”
He waited, hoping she’d admit she cared...but she didn’t.
As if fighting off emotion, Honor’s face pinched, then she pushed back her chair—and surprised him by climbing into his lap.
Hell yeah. Loving the feel of her gentle weight, her implicit trust, Jason cradled her to his heart. “Please don’t ever feel guilty or ashamed for being with me.”
She nodded, swallowed loudly and squeezed him tighter.
That made up his mind for him. “I’m sleeping here again tonight. Thought you should know that.”
She made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a choking sob.
He rocked her, kissed her ear, her shoulder and hugged her tighter.
A few minutes later, a tentative tap sounded on the front door. Honor’s head snapped up so fast she almost head-butted him.
“Take it easy.”
Big eyes stared at him. “Whoever it is will know you stayed the night!”
“So?” She wasn’t a prude, so why did she care? “We’re adults, honey. We can do whatever we want.” He bit her shoulder and whispered, “I want to do you.”
Around a nervous laugh, Honor pressed him back. “People will assume things if they know you stayed over.”
“They’ll assume we had sex.”
She glanced toward the front door worriedly. “I don’t mean that.”
Ah. So she was again concerned about him getting pressured? “They’ll also assume you’re off the market, rightfully so.”
Her gaze shot back to his again. At this rate she’d give herself whiplash. “We’re exclusive?”
“Far as I’m concerned, we are.” He gave her a quick kiss. “I hope like hell you’re not planning to see anyone else.”
“I’m not,” she said fast.
Jason started to say the same, but she was already scrambling away, smoothing her hair—and looking guilty again.
Biting back his frustration, he followed her to the front door. When she opened it, they found Hogan and Colt both standing there, and they had the dog—which immediately yanked away from Colt and lurched in, dragging his leash behind him.
Half laughing, Honor got out of his way as Diesel made a beeline for her couch, jumped up on it, circled twice and dropped with a doggy huff. Resting his head on his paws, he looked at her with big chocolate eyes.
Blank-faced, Colt stared at the dog. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting him to do that.”
“He’s fast,” Honor said.
“Nathan had him at the station for a while and he got used to hanging out on their old beat-up couch, and now he sleeps on my bed with me, so—” Colt wedged in, too, going after Diesel.
>
“He’s fine,” Honor rushed to say. “Looks like he made himself comfortable, that’s all.” She strode over to the dog and sat beside him.
To her obvious consternation, Diesel crawled up and over her lap, draping himself across her legs, licking her face and thumping his tail. Since the dog was nearly as big as her, it was a sight to see.
They all made to reach for the dog, but stopped when Honor laughed, hugged him and started scratching his ears.
Grinning, Colt said, “Guess he likes you.”
“Guess so.”
Yeah, Jason thought, a dog wasn’t a bad idea at all. Though Diesel didn’t seem aggressive enough to be much protection, he owed Nathan for thinking of it. Already Honor seemed more relaxed just by petting him.
She glanced up. “You guys are here to see Jason?”
Hogan smiled at her. “Actually I wanted to see if you’d join us this weekend for the mud volleyball tournament.”
Her brows lifted. “Mud volleyball?”
Hogan scrunched onto the couch next to her, toward the butt end of the stretched-out dog. “We play on a field back by the creek. Jason roped me into it when I first came here. Told me it’d be fun.”
Jason grinned. “You enjoyed yourself.”
“I ended up covered in mud from head to toe.” Hogan’s expression held a wealth of significance. “But it did give me something else to focus on for a while.”
“As I recall,” Jason said, “he focused on complaining.”
“Only because my son abandoned me and sided up with Jason and Violet.”
“Violet?” Honor asked. “From the diner?”
Hogan nodded. “If you’ve met her, you know what a competitor she is.”
Puzzled, Honor lifted her shoulders. “I didn’t realize.”
“She’s really good,” Colt said. “And yeah, she’s mean about winning.”
“The three of them dominated, so even though the others on their team weren’t that great, they still skunked my group,” Hogan admitted.
“We get together a lot during the warmer weather,” Jason explained. “From spring to fall, there’s one activity or another. You should join us, Honor. You’ll like it.”
“I suck at sports.”
“Wear a bikini top like Violet,” Colt suggested with an impish grin. “It’ll distract everyone enough that no one will notice if you can actually play or not.”
Jason put him in a headlock and knuckled his head. “You’re too young to be distracted.”
“Yeah, right.” He snorted as he freed himself. “A woman in a bikini? I’ve been noticing that since I was ten.”
They all laughed—and that’s when Jason noticed the dog had gone still and alert. “Hey, boy.” He walked over, let Diesel sniff his hand, then slowly pet him. “We were just playing.”
Expression watchful, Diesel looked at him, at Colt, then up at Honor.
Full of compassion, she reassured the dog, “It’s okay, I promise.”
And with that, Diesel dropped his head and closed his eyes to doze.
Interesting. They’d have to remember that the dog was, in fact, attuned to trouble. Had he seen abuse? Maybe suffered it?
Jason hated that thought, but he knew everyone else wondered the same thing.
Hogan picked up the conversation again. “I know you’ve got your hands full right now, but I’m thinking by this weekend you need to get around friends.”
“I don’t have any friends here.”
Pretending affront, Hogan asked, “What am I?”
“And me?” Colt added.
“Sullivan and Nathan will be there, too, and Violet.” All in all, Jason thought it was a terrific idea. “We can ask Lexie to join us. What do you think?”
Tempting her, Hogan said, “I’ll be cooking ribs, and I don’t mind saying they’ll be the best ribs you’ve ever tasted, guaranteed. My ribs alone are worth joining us, but the others will have corn on the cob and salad and too many desserts to count.”
“We tie a rope from one of the trees along the bank and swing out into the creek to wash off the mud,” Colt told her. “It’s fun, I promise.”
With an expression close to wonder, she looked around the room at each of them. “I could come along and help cook.”
“And play mud volleyball.”
“And swing out to the creek.”
Jason laughed at the way his family twisted her arm. “You may as well say yes, honey. They can be relentless.”
Keeping her attention on the dog, Honor said, “Relentless in a very nice way.”
After glancing at Jason, Hogan let her off the hook—for now. “Promise me you’ll think about it. Because seriously, Honor, the ribs are worth it.”
“I’ll think about it, thank you.”
Jason saw the discomfort Hogan and Colt felt. Because Honor acted so stiff, almost formal, they weren’t sure if they were intruding. Sometimes he wasn’t sure, either.
“I’ll work on her later.” Because one way or another, he’d be close by in case she needed him. Also determined to help her accept their friendship, he added, “Since you’re both already here, why don’t I pour more coffee? We can sit on the porch.”
Honor looked surprised, but not displeased by the idea. “I don’t have any seats yet.”
“Stairs work,” Colt told her, and headed out.
Hogan went with him.
Honor remained on the couch with Diesel. Sitting beside her, Jason used two fingers to bring her face around to his. “What arrangements have been made?”
She looked away. Voice steady and rehearsed, she went through the details, naming the funeral home and grave site, both outside the neighborhood but still fairly close.
“Celeste insisted that the wake should be a little longer because Granddad had so many friends and business acquaintances. Neil agreed that Granddad would want that. So the wake starts Wednesday, and we’ll...we’ll bury him Friday.”
It was asking a lot to want her to join in on the fun the very next day—but he’d ask anyway. “Do you think your grandfather would want you to be so sad?”
She shook her head hard. “No. It always bothered him.”
Meaning she’d been sad a lot? Outside, they heard Colt laugh at something Hogan said.
Wistful, Honor looked toward the door.
“They mean well.”
“It’s pretty wonderful, actually. Having neighbors visit, just...chatting.”
Was that part of what she’d imagined when buying her own home? So many things were unfamiliar to her because of her upbringing and unnatural relatives. What others took for granted seemed to be gifts to Honor, and damn it, he wanted to give her everything.
Putting a hand on the dog’s back, he asked, “What do you have planned today?”
“I have to run into the salon for a few hours.”
That surprised him. “Seriously? They didn’t give you any time off?”
“They offered me all the time I needed. But I have two regular clients with very special events coming up. One an engagement party, and another an important business trip. No one else has done their hair for years, and I don’t want to disappoint them.”
Unbelievable.
Honor shrugged. “Besides, I like to stay busy.” She wrinkled her nose. “But I don’t need to be anywhere for a few more hours at least.”
He stood, took Diesel’s leash and patted his thigh to get the dog moving, then took Honor’s hand and pulled her to her feet. “Outside with you, then. Visit. Relax. I’ll be out with the coffee in a minute.”
She glanced at the door with longing before giving in with a smile. “There’s a tray on top of the fridge.” She hesitated, stared up at him, and surprised him by going on tiptoe to give him a quick, soft kiss. “Thank you, Jason. For everything.”
He wondered if her gratitude covered the sex. With Honor, he just never knew.
* * *
As usual, Honor insisted on going it alone. At this point, Lexie knew she was bei
ng a pest by calling, and offering, and worrying—not that Honor would ever say so.
In so many ways, Honor was like a sister, except that she so often got stubborn and refused to let Lexie help.
Knowing that Jason had been able to get closer to Honor both pleased Lexie and...damn it, it made her a little envious.
She wanted Honor happy, and as she’d told her, a sexy hunk could brighten any girl’s day. But she wanted to be there for Honor, too.
And instead it felt like she’d been replaced.
Dumb. She would not complicate Honor’s life more with petty jealousy.
Instead she decided she needed her own sexy hunk to give her a different focus. Never mind that Sullivan hadn’t called, and that the last time she’d seen him, he made it clear he wasn’t interested in a repeat.
Tough titty for him, because she wasn’t done. And regardless of what he claimed to want, the way he’d kissed her...well, she thought she might have a chance of swaying him.
A very good chance, in fact.
Refusing to warn him, she mustered up her courage and, after calling to find out the details, showed up at his MMA school. The same pleasant, older woman she’d spoken to on the phone greeted her at a big front desk separated from the gym by floor-to-ceiling glass. Just beyond, she could see Sullivan talking to two kids while others of all ages jogged around the perimeter of the gym floor.
“You said adults could join this class?”
The receptionist smiled at her. “Some days are specific to age groups, but not tonight. It just happens that the oldest is only fifteen. If you’d like to come back for the adults-only—”
“No, it’s fine.” If she left now, she’d let her cowardice get the better of her and she might never return. “I like kids.” At least if she totally blew it, she wouldn’t have any adults witnessing her embarrassment.
“They’re warming up right now. If you want to give me your information and make your first payment, I can introduce you to Mr. Dean and you can join them.”
Heart beating too fast, Lexie had a difficult time pulling her attention off Sullivan. He stood barefoot, dressed in loose white pants with a white tunic tied at the waist. So gorgeous.
At least she’d dressed correctly, given what the kids wore—meaning T-shirts and shorts. Granted, hers were a little more stylish, and fit her body to perfection, but the idea was the same: comfort.