by Taryn Steele
“Oh, don’t I know it. What are you doing down here anyway?”
“Jameson is coming over so I thought I’d wait down here for him and visit with you.” As if on cue, Jameson pulls into the driveway. He gets out of his car and starts walking toward us in the garage. He makes it about ten feet and his cell phone starts ringing. He pauses a moment, looks at it to see whose calling and answers it. He sees me looking at him, so he holds up his pointer finger at me to tell me to hang on a moment.
About five minutes later I see him trotting back towards us in the garage. I kind of tilt my head giving him the ‘what was that call all about look.’ He stares at me and as he rolls his eyes he says “It was my mother.”
“Didn’t you just leave your place?” I ask.
“Yup.”
“Was there an emergency?” I wonder.
“Nope. She called because she wanted to know where I was because she went grocery shopping and had a few too many bags and wanted help.” He tells us.
It’s beginning to get to the point that every time I hear about this woman, my nerves are on edge and my frustration level rises. “You’re kidding me, right? The woman who brags about being independent and not needing anyone’s help called you to help her with a couple of grocery bags? So I guess that kind of gives me a look in to how well your talk with her went.”
“Let’s just say I had to take aspirin before I left. And I told her I was coming here, so I don’t know why she pretended to not know where I was. Whatever.” He shrugs it off and turns to my dad.
“Mr. Nowal, how’s it going sir?”
“Not bad, Jameson. Looks like you could use a beer. They’re in the fridge right over there. Help yourself.”
“Absolutely. Thank you.” Jameson replies.
I follow him over to the refrigerator that my dad always keeps fully stocked with his favorite Busch beer. “Did you find my ring?” The strained look in his eyes has me worried.
“I did,” he says, putting his hand in right jean pocket taking it out and handing it to me.
“Oh, thank God!” I exclaim. “Where was it?”
“Yeah, about that. When I looked all around and couldn’t find it I took a break. I was putting away laundry and found it in my mother’s dresser drawer. When I asked her about it she said you must have put it there trying to set her up.”
I am shocked. I am speechless. I’m standing there like a statue with my mouth dropped open. It feels like my jaw is at my knees. “Are you fucking kidding me right now with this shit?”
Jameson takes my hands in his but I pull away. “Hillary, I don’t believe you are trying to set up my mother but I don’t know why she would take your ring and hide it either. I was just chalking it up to a weird fucking freak thing.”
“Jameson, I don’t know what to think anymore. This is really starting to upset me more and more. Your mom clearly has it out for me for some reason I don’t know how much longer I can put up with it because I think part of you is in denial.”
With his hands on his hips he drops his head and lets out an incredibly long breath. Slightly shaking his head he looks back up to me. “I am in denial. You’re right. I just want to go one night without having to think about it. Is that okay?” He looks so hurt. I can’t deny him his simple request.
“Get your asses over here, drama club,” my dad shouts breaking the tension. We can’t help but laugh.
The three of us all pulled up five gallon buckets to sit on, because my dad never had chairs down there. It was the garage. He and my mom parked their cars in there. When my dad had a project to work on he pulled his vehicle out in to the driveway. We sat in the garage with my dad for about an hour just “shootin the shit” as my dad would say when we could hear my mom making her way down the stairs.
“Well hello my future son-in-law. I was wondering when you were going to come upstairs and say hello but I see that probably isn’t going to happen.”
“Hi. I’m sorry. We got wrapped up in some conversations. I was going to come up eventually to say hello.”
“I’m just giving you a hard time. I was actually going to ask if you two were staying here or going out. I was going to offer to buy pizza if you wanted to stay.” She tells us.
I look at Jameson and just shrug my shoulders, letting him know I’m cool either way. He does the same and we tell her sure. My dad is not one to show emotion but I could see the smile on his face when we said we’d stay. I know I’m not home a lot lately and I know he’s enjoying this time with Jameson and I in the garage. I’m enjoying it too.
PIZZA, BEER AND TWO MOVIES later everyone is yawning. I ask Jameson if he wants to crash here. He starts laughing and making jokes about the two of us sleeping in my twin bed with springs trying to push through the material. I can’t blame him for not wanting to stay. My bed is small and painful for me too, but I don’t want him to leave just yet either because we still hadn’t had a chance yet to talk about his conversation with his mom.
After some minor debate and Jameson remembering his mom is leaving the apartment early tomorrow morning for some farmers market trip with his grandparents a couple of hours away I agree to sleep over. I put some clothes in an overnight bag, we say our goodbyes to my parents and we leave.
I notice Jameson looking at his cell phone a lot during our drive back to his apartment. Curiosity finally gets the better of me so I speak up. “Okay, I can’t take it anymore. Why do you keep looking at your phone? Are you expecting a call or what?” He lets out a huge sigh.
“I wasn’t going to say anything but after multiple threats from Lily, if I don’t I guess now is as good a time as any.”
“Threats? Lily? What the hell is going on?” I say in a panicked tone.
“A couple of weeks ago Pam called me and asked me to meet her for coffee and I did. She asked me to give her another chance and get back together with her.” He admits.
“Oh. She doesn’t know about me?” I ask.
“No. She knows about you, and that we’re engaged.”
“And she still did this?” I’m shocked.
“Yes, she did.”
“And you said…?” I ask waiting for more information while speedily tapping my feet feeling anxiety creeping up in all crevices of my body.
“I told her I was happily engaged to you and we were looking for a house together.”
“And Bevan and Lily knew about this?”
“Yes. I didn’t know what to do at first. My mom said go meet Pam. Bevan and Lily said no. I didn’t think it would do any harm.”
“Wait a minute. Your mom said to go meet Pam? Hmph, why am I not surprised?” Now I’m really pissed. “I suddenly have the urge to go back home, Jameson.” I tell him. “I can’t think straight right now and if I go back to your apartment and see your mom sitting there I will probably start screaming and yelling at her.” I’m becoming extremely figidity in the car. My feet are tapping. My hands are tapping and touching everything. I can’t pace back and forth like I want to unless I jump out of a moving car on the highway. There’s no point in asking him to pull over because he knows me. He knows I’ll get out and start walking back towards home no matter how far away I am.
“No!” He shouts. “I’m not taking you back home. We are going to talk about this. Our exit is coming up and we will pull in to the nearest parking lot and talk about this but I will not let you run on me again, Hillary.”
I sit in the car in silence and stare out the window. I can feel the tears rushing, my chest tightening with anxiety. What’s going to happen to us now? Will Pam continue to be a problem? If she knows about me and our engagement and still tries to convince Jameson to come back to her what else will she attempt to do? I know why Bevan didn’t say anything to me. He’s Jameson’s best friend but Lily, she’s supposed to be mine. How could she keep this from me?
A few minutes later Jameson pulls in to a parking lot, puts the car in park and shuts it off. He takes a deep breath and turns towards me. My hands are sweaty. I
can’t stop cracking my knuckles to try to relieve the tension I’m feeling.
“Hillary, listen to me carefully. I love you. From the moment I saw you at Dawn’s I literally lost my balance over your beauty. Pam and I are over. I honestly did not know what she wanted to meet with me about. I didn’t think it would do any harm.” He shrugs. “I was wrong in not telling you about it right away but I didn’t know how to approach it. She is not a danger to us. I told her to lose my number and not contact me again. Lily gave me a deadline on when to tell you, otherwise she was going to, so don’t be mad at her for not telling you right away.” He stops as if to give me an opportunity to respond, but I don’t say anything.
“My mother,” he goes on, “well… she’s a different story and you know that too. My talk with her today was all over the place. I told her how it wasn’t fair of her to give us guilt trips for not inviting her out with us when we go out with our friends, and she needed to make new friends her own age.” He sighs.
“My point is you, Hillary Nowal. You are all I want. You are like no woman I have ever met in my life. You make me open my eyes to thoughts I didn’t realize were there. I fell in love with you because of all of those things you never knew you were doing. While you have been trying to free yourself of your past, you’ve been helping me somehow to become a better person. Somehow you make me powerful and powerless at the same time. You aren’t just the one for me. You’re the only one for me.”
Holy shit!
“Worthless!”
July 1, 2002
IT’S BEEN THREE WEEKS since our talk in the car and I can see a difference. Marcie has changed her attitude towards me a little bit. Jameson and I have learned to ignore it and suck it up until we find our own place.
Yesterday my mother surprised me with news that my brother moved out in to a rental house with some friends and she bought me a brand new queen size mattress and box spring. So not only do I get a bigger bedroom but a brand new bed. She must really like Jameson because she has never condoned a guy sleeping over, let alone in a bed with me. Even when she was calling me a whore when I was fifteen years old. I think I’m in the Twilight Zone.
It’s a rainy Saturday, so today Jameson and I are going to take a trip to find some new sheets, pillowcases and a comforter for my new bed. We’re excited too, because it’s one less thing we have to buy for our new house when we finally find one. We also talked about picking up things for our future home when we see them on sale, like a coffee pot or a toaster. I think it’s pretty smart of us, actually.
Since our one-year dating anniversary is coming up, we decided that after going out for a nice dinner, we would make a gift-register for our wedding, as we’re having fun picking up items here and there for our future home. My mom’s friend and co-worker Jane suggested it, mentioning she would like to get us something for our house for Christmas. She’s been awesome. She’s been doing the same thing for us when she goes shopping except it’s for the things we don’t think about like toothpaste, peroxide, and laundry detergent.
Normally, I’m the impatient one in our relationship, but lately it’s been Jameson with buying a house. Marcie is grating on his nerves. We’ve been saving a lot of time by doing research of houses online.
I overheard Marcie on the phone talking to her sister about wanting to buy a house. I rolled my eyes and laughed to myself. She has never owned a home and has never once mentioned wanting to until we started talking about it. I am fine with it. I want her to find a house first so we can go in the opposite direction. If we get our house first, I am scared to death she will intentionally look in our neighborhood to be close to Jameson. I know it’s not nice to say but it’s the truth. If I’m moving over forty miles away from my family and my job for him and the company discount, I shouldn’t have to live a quarter of a mile away from his mom who refuses to cut the umbilical cord.
AFTER A LONG DAY OF SHOPPING, being in and out of the rain, driving back home to put the sheets and comforter on the new bed we are whooped. I’m excited for us to sleep in our new bed together.
It doesn’t take long for that excitement to end though. Jameson’s phone is ringing and I can tell by the expression on his face its Marcie. He takes a few steps away from me but I can hear him say “I told you I was spending the night at Hillary’s.”
What could possibly be the problem this time?
He lets out a frustrated growl, closes his phone shut and tosses it on my bed.
“She has a migraine and is out of cigarettes. She doesn’t want to drive to the store because the migraine has caused some blurry vision.”
“And that is your problem forty miles away how?” I say sarcastically. “What the hell Jameson? Why is she always trying to pull you away from here when you visit?”
“She’s not always pulling me away from here.”
“Last time you drove down here she called you to help her carry groceries because she didn’t want to make two trips to the car.” I remind him.
“Okay, how about this. You come back with me, spend the night and then next weekend Friday and Saturday night we stay here?” He suggests.
I ponder that for a moment wondering how I can convince myself to agree, if he can agree to make sure Marcie knows and doesn’t not call him a million times all weekend for bullshit reasons. I have to think fast.
“On one condition. You have to tell your mom we are going away or something like that so she is not blowing up your phone with ridiculous reasons to lure you back home ruining our infrequent time together.”
“Deal. Thank you for doing this.”
Even though I keep clothes and toiletries at Jameson’s I always put together a bag of some extras just in case. So while I’m doing that Jameson is filling my parents in on our change of plans and saying goodnight.
Our drive back is kind of quiet. I’m confident Jameson can tell I’m disappointed. The entire ride he has been holding my hand and grazing his thumb over my knuckles. It’s his unspoken way of apologizing and thanking me at the same time.
When we arrive at the apartment I smile at Marcie and say hi while I kick my shoes off of go right to his bedroom. Less than five minutes later Jameson is right behind me. I change in to my pajamas and crawl underneath the covers and wait for him to do the same. He grabs the TV remote, tosses it on the bed and starts undressing.
“Want to watch a movie and cuddle?” He asks me.
“Sure. What do you want to watch?”
“Hit the guide button and let’s see what’s on.” He tells me, so I do. “Oh! Stop! Look! It’s our favorite movie, ‘Pitch Black’. Put that one.” He says jokingly.
“No friggin’ way dude. We have watched that at least ten thousand times.” I remind him.
“I’m kidding. I’m kidding. Put on whatever you want, funny, scary, romantic, maybe some porn.” He says with a devilish grin.
“Yeah, that’s not happening tonight buddy but nice try.” I declare.
July 2, 2002
Around three o’clock in the morning I feel Jameson’s hand running up and down my thigh. Although I am very sleepy the tingling sensation awakens me. He feels me move, so he knows he has awaken me and has at least part of my attention. I’m lying on my side with my back to him. He brushes my hair away from my neck and my back and starts gently kissing me all over. The bristly feeling from his goatee is tickling me in the best way ever and I can’t help but release a giggle. He wraps an arm around my waist and places it on my lower stomach just above my lady parts. He’s starting that slow tease that drives me crazy with desire. I take one of my arms and reach around to graze my nails on his ass. I tip my chin up higher so he has more access to my neck. He pulls at my hips and rolls me toward him. With his hand on my cheek he brushes his thumb across my bottom lip. The look in his slightly drunken blue eyes tell me all I need to know. He wants me here and now. He slams his lips into mine, delving his tongue hard in to my mouth. His hand is moving down from my cheek, dragging his fingertips ever so lightly dow
n my neck causing goose bumps to break out all over my body. His hand gets hungry, runs up my t-shirt and grabs for my right breast.
“Mmm.” A soft moan escapes my mouth.
Jameson takes my hands and pulls me up into a sitting position. He takes my t-shirt and pulls it over my head exposing my bare chest.
“That’s the Hillary I want to see. Now lay back down.”
He’s so gentle with me. Laying feather light kisses on my neck, on my stomach … oh crap … he’s working his way down.
He starts pulling at my pajama shorts. I silently pray to myself I smell good. Then I start to wonder if I’m the only one who does that. Do girls who have been with their guy for years and years still worry how good they smell down there?
“Oh god!” I moan out.
Jameson’s tongue snaps me out of my thought. He’s like a hungry wolf and I’m loving every minute of it. I wrap my legs around him and find myself rocking back and forth to the sensations he’s sending through my body. I need him to stop! I’m at that moment when the anticipation is so exhilarating it almost hurts. As much as I’m enjoying this I need him inside of me. I want him inside of me.
“Jameson… Stop… I need you… I... lay down. I want to ride you.”
He stands up where I can now see his rock hard erection. He didn’t have to undress, Jameson always sleeps naked. It’s me he has to wait for to undress when it comes to sex. He climbs up on to the bed and lays down just like I want him. I swing my leg over and gently slide on to his rock hard, slick cock. I bite my lower lip in elation and Jameson lets out the sexiest moan I’ve ever heard.
It brings a smile to my face knowing the pleasure I bring him to and I haven’t even gotten started yet. His hands immediately go to my hips, my hands to his chest and I start to rock back and forth. Both of us easily falling in to motion with each other. I can feel the heat start in my toes. I can tell by Jameson’s breathing he’s coming close. Yes!