Amish Christmas Joy (Mills & Boon Love Inspired) (Brides of Amish Country - Book 10)

by Davids, Patricia

  Ike took it and hung it on the pegs made to hold it. “Your daughter seems to like it here. The place she came from, it sounds like she was unhappy there.”

  Caleb picked up a brush and began to rub down the horse. “I don’t think Joy has met with much kindness in her life. Handicapped children are not always welcomed in the Englisch world. Some see them as a burden.”

  Ike stopped working and stared at Caleb. “And how do you see her?”

  Chapter Seven

  Caleb stopped brushing and looked over the animal’s back at his father. “You mean do I see Joy as a burden?”

  Ike began to wipe down the harness pieces with an oiled rag. “You bring her to us and say you intend to leave. What are we to think?”

  “I’m sure it looks like I’m trying to get rid of her. I don’t know. Maybe that is what I’m doing. I wasn’t prepared to have a child, let alone one with Joy’s special needs. I tried to manage, but the harder I tried the more difficult she became. She hid from me. She ran away. She kept trying to go back to where her grandmother lived because she thought her mother would come find her there. I lived in constant fear that she would disappear and I wouldn’t be able to find her.”

  “This fear I know well. I have lived with it for many years.”

  Shame welled up in Caleb. “I have done some things that I’m not proud of in my life, but what I did to you and mother was cruel. I’m truly sorry. I hope you can forgive me.”

  “We forgave you long ago.”

  “Danki, Father. If Joy can’t stay here with you, I don’t know what I will do.”

  “Our ways are the best ways. For us.” He patted his chest for emphasis. “They are not best for everyone. You have chosen an Englisch life. This I cannot like, but I know a man must find his own way. Until you are certain why you brought Joy to us, I cannot say that she may stay.”

  “You want to send her back into a world that is cruel and unjust to her?”

  “It breaks my heart to say this, for she is flesh of my flesh, my own granddaughter, but you are her father. She belongs with you.”

  “You sound like Leah. I can’t give Joy what she needs. She needs stability, a sense of belonging, a place where she can feel safe.”

  “What she needs, what all children need, is love. If you give her that, all else will follow.”

  Caleb started brushing Bobby again. “It’s not always that simple.”

  “Which commandment did Jesus say was the first of all?”

  “Mark 12:28–31. ‘The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.’”

  Ike smiled. “You have not forgotten all I have taught you.”

  “No, not all.”

  Ike grew solemn again. “Your brother doesn’t think I should allow you to stay here. He says you are unrepentant for the shame you brought on our family. Others in the church will agree with him.”

  “Good old Wayne. Always the upstanding one. The one that never got into trouble.” He wasn’t proud of the bitterness that seeped into his tone. Leah had said not everyone had a forgiving nature. Like her, it was something he needed to work on.

  Strange how often his thoughts turned to her and how much weight he gave to her words.

  “You once looked at your brother with admiration and love, and he looked at you the same way. What came between the two of you?”

  Caleb began putting away the grooming gear. “You know the story.”

  “I know what you both have told me. What haven’t you told me?”

  Caleb struggled with how to answer his father’s question. The barn was quiet; only the rustling of the animals in the nearby stalls broke the stillness. As much as he wanted to clear his name and mend his relationship with his father, he couldn’t do it. It wasn’t his secret to share. He had given his promise to Wayne and he wouldn’t go back on it.

  “I wish I could tell you, Daed, but it’s between Wayne and me. Can you accept that?”

  “It seems that I must,” Ike replied wearily.

  “Do you want me to take my daughter and leave? I will. I don’t want to cause trouble for you.”

  “What child doesn’t cause a father trouble? Nee, you may stay awhile longer. Your mother hopes you will stay until Christmas, at least.”

  “I won’t leave before then unless you ask me to.”

  “Goot. That will make your mother happy.”

  The two walked back to the house side by side. Ike stopped and looked up. “It will snow soon.”

  Caleb saw only clear blue sky. “Are your bones telling you that?”

  “Nee, I heard the forecast on the radio at the feed store yesterday.”

  Chuckling, Caleb shook his head. “I’ve forgotten how much of the outside world actually seeps into this community.”

  “As long as we do not seek the things of the outside world for ourselves but keep Gott at the front of our lives, there is little harm in listening to the radio once in a while.”

  “Especially when the Cleveland Indians are playing. How did they do this year?” His father, like a lot of Amish, loved baseball and followed local as well as national teams in the newspaper.

  “Not as well as some, but there is always next year. Hope Springs had a wunderbaar girls’ softball team this year. Those Miller twins can sure hit a ball. They went all the way to the state championships, but they didn’t win. Reminded me of the time you and Wayne played for that team over by Berlin. You boys were goot. You made it to the state tournament, too.”

  “And we didn’t win, either, but we had a great pitcher. Roman Weaver should have gone on to play pro ball. Is he still working with his daed at the sawmill?”

  “Nee, Roman’s arm was crushed when a car hit his buggy. He is slowly getting better, but he has taken over his uncle’s printing business.”

  By this time, they had reached the house. Caleb held the door open for his father to go in. His mother was already at the stove getting started on supper. Joy knelt on a chair in front of the sink, washing the dishes they had brought home from lunch. She grinned at him. “Look, Daed, I’m helping.”

  “So you are.” He’d never seen anyone so excited to be washing plates.

  “Nana never let me wash dishes ’cause Jake said I was too clumsy. I only dropped one glass and broke it so far. Mammi didn’t even get mad. She broke one, too.”

  “Did she?” Ike looked to his wife for an explanation.

  Maggie shrugged. “I told her it could happen to anyone and not to fret. Then it happened to me. We are keeping score. The one with the fewest broken dishes at the end of the year wins.”

  Ike huffed. “I reckon I’ll be buying new plates before spring.”

  Maggie grinned. “A new set for Christmas would be nice. These are old and chipped. What were you two talking about?”

  She was still hopeful that Caleb would change his mind and stay. He read it in her eyes.

  Ike gave a slight shake of his head. She turned back to the stove, but her shoulders drooped ever so slightly.

  “I was telling Caleb about Roman Weaver’s accident.”

  Maggie stirred a pot of stew. “He sure surprised us all when he married Joann Yoder last month. I thought she would stay a spinster forever. Would you like some kaffi, Ike?”

  He shook his head. “Maybe later. I think I’ll read the Good Book for a while.”

  Joy slid off her chair. “I’m finished.”

  Ike looked over her work. “You’ve done a fine job. Would you like me to read you a story from the Bible?”

  “I guess, since there isn’t any TV.”

  Caleb slapped his palm over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud. His father scowled at him but extended his hand to Joy. “I will read you a st
ory about a great flood and how Gott saved Noah and all the animals.”

  As his father and Joy left the kitchen, Caleb said, “I’ll take a cup of coffee if you have it ready.”

  “Help yourself.”

  He fetched a mug from the cupboard and filled it from the pot simmering on the back of the stove. “Speaking of spinsters, I’m amazed that Leah never married.”

  He wasn’t sure he should broach the subject, but his mother was in a position to know Leah pretty well.

  “It wasn’t from a lack of suitors. There were plenty of young fellows who wanted to walk out with her, but she never took to anyone after...”

  “After Wayne married Rhonda.”

  “Ja.”

  “She must have loved him a lot.” Was it any wonder she hadn’t forgiven Caleb for his part in wrecking her dreams of a home and a family of her own?

  His mother turned to him. “All things happen for a reason, Caleb.”

  “I can’t imagine the reason for so many messed-up lives.” All because of him.

  “Nor could I, but look into the other room. What do you see?”

  He glanced over and saw his father in his favorite chair with Joy parked on his knee, listening intently as he read to her. “I see a little girl who is opening up, becoming the happy child I knew she could be.”

  “Ja. Gott sends such special children to a family for a special reason. He sent her to you. He has a reason. I, for one, am very, very grateful for His gift. You should be, too. Now, I must get some plums from the cellar. Your father loves to have plums for dessert on Sunday night.” She opened the door at the back of the kitchen and took a lamp with her as she went downstairs.

  Caleb sipped his coffee as he listened to the story his father was reading. He hadn’t thought of Joy as a gift. He’d only seen the problems she presented. He was guilty of seeing her disability and not her abilities as surly as the people who’d made him angry when they looked away from her or called her retarded.

  No more. From now on, he would focus on the positive things his daughter brought to him.

  Coming here was meant to benefit Joy. It turned out that he was also reaping the benefits of his parents’ wisdom and faith. He had let an important part of himself wither away when he shut God out of his life.

  A special child given for a special reason. Maybe his mother was right. Without Joy, he might never have come back to his family and to God.

  He took his coffee into the living room and sat on the sofa next to his father and Joy. He listened to his father read the Bible and watched a whole new world open up for his child.

  * * *

  “I want to see the puppies. Pickles is missing me, I know she is. You don’t want her to be unhappy, do you?”

  Joy had been bugging Caleb for the past three days to visit Leah. He was running out of excuses. They were sitting on the back step, shelling black walnuts for his mother. She intended to bake black walnut cookies for an upcoming cookie exchange. The snow that had fallen on Sunday night was melting in the bright sunshine. His mother was doing her laundry at the propane-powered wringer washer on the back porch.

  He cracked another shell and handed it to Joy to pick out the nut meat. “Honey, Leah may not be home.”

  “Call her and see.”

  “I can’t call her. She doesn’t have a phone. The Amish don’t use telephones in their homes.”

  “That’s just silly.”

  “It may seem silly to you, but it is not silly to Leah, or to grandpa and grandma. You can write her a letter and ask if you may come visit Pickles. In a few days you will have your answer.”

  “But I don’t want to wait a few days. I want to see Pickles today.”

  “Not today. I’m sorry. I will help you write your letter.” He was learning to be firm with her. She hadn’t had a meltdown since the one when they arrived in Hope Springs, but he knew it wouldn’t take much to trigger another.

  His mother came through the screen door with a basket of laundry in her arms. “Why the long face on such a beautiful day, Joy?”

  “Daddy says I can’t go see my puppy, and I’m sad.”

  Maggie looked to Caleb for an explanation. “Leah showed Joy her puppies the first day we came to town. She allowed Joy to name one. Since then, this kid has been bugging me to take her back to see them again.”

  “There’s no reason you can’t go visit Leah this evening.”

  A rush of eagerness filled Caleb at the thought of seeing Leah again. He was being foolish, but he couldn’t help it. There was something special about her. It was more than the way she treated Joy. It was something he couldn’t define. Simply being in her company made him happy. Did she feel the same way? Would she miss him when he was gone?

  “Joy, can you help me hang the clothes on the line so they will dry?” his mother asked.

  “Sure, but why don’t you just put them in the dryer?”

  Caleb put aside his hammer and followed them to the clothesline. Maggie set her basket down and raised her hands to the sky. “This is my clothes dryer. The good Lord has given me sunshine today. My clothes will be dry enough in no time. Didn’t your Nana have a clothesline?”

  “We took our things to the Laundromat.”

  “I think you will see that this way is better. The clothes will smell so nice and fresh. Can you help me pin these pants to the line?”

  Joy stretched her arms above her head. “I can’t reach it.”

  Caleb wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her to the proper height. “Now can you get it?”

  Joy giggled. “I’m as tall as you are.”

  “And almost as heavy. Get to pinning.”

  His arms were starting to ache by the time they were finished, but seeing his mother and his daughter working happily together was worth the discomfort.

  When he put Joy’s feet on the ground, she clapped her hands together and bounced up and down. “Can we go see the puppies now? Can we?”

  His mother shook her head. “School doesn’t let out until three-thirty. Then we must give Leah time to get home. You should go at four o’clock. I have another basket to hang. Don’t run off.”

  As his mother went back up to the porch, Joy turned to him. “What time is it now, Daddy?”

  “It’s not time to go yet.”

  “Will you tell me as soon as it’s time?”

  “I will.”

  “Promise?”

  “I promise. Do you believe me?”

  She looked at him intently, then gave him a great big grin. “Ja! You always keep your promises.”

  “That’s right, I do.” No matter how painful it was to do so.

  He shook off the thought. “Here comes your grossmammi with another load. Let’s help her hang up the clothes.” He picked up Joy again.

  “Someday I’m going to be big enough to do this by myself,” she declared, struggling to place a clothespin on one end of the sheet his mother hung over the line.

  Someday she would be, and he wouldn’t be around to see it. The thought was a sobering one. He wanted to see her grow up. He wanted some part in who she became.

  So, why couldn’t he come back to visit? Now that he had faced his parents and gotten over that hump, was there really a reason he couldn’t? Just because he couldn’t live Amish didn’t mean he had to cut himself off from Joy completely. Would his parents agree to his visits? He was sure his mother would.

  Cheered by the idea, he started thinking about annual or semiannual trips home. He’d write and let his folks know he was coming so Wayne and Rhonda could avoid seeing him if that was how they wanted it. Perhaps in time, that rift could be mended, too.

  He wanted to see Joy grow up. He wanted to be a part of her life, even if it was a small part. Until now, he’d only focused on the crisis in front of him. He’d been unable to look ahead. Now that he could, coming back for visits was a great idea.

  He would tell Leah of his decision tonight. What would she think of it?

  * * *
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  Trixie’s barking alerted Leah and her friends Rebecca, Sarah and Joann to more visitors. Leah was surprised to see Caleb and Joy on her front porch when she opened the door. “Gutenowed.”

  Caleb looked ill at ease. “Good evening. I see by the buggies out here that you have company. I hope we’re not imposing.”

  “I want to see Pickles. Can I, please?” Joy bounced beside him.

  “Joy has been bugging me to let her visit the puppies again. My mother thought it would be all right if we came after you got home from school tonight.”

  Leah had mentioned tonight’s baking frolic to Maggie and Rhonda at church. Maggie must have sent Caleb today because she knew Leah would have company. It eased the awkwardness of allowing Caleb into her home. Bless Maggie for being so considerate, but why hadn’t she brought Joy?

  Joy folded her hands together. “Please, can I see Pickles? I know she’s missed me.”

  Grinning at the girl’s excitement, Leah nodded. “I think she has been missing you. Come in.”

  Caleb, his shoulders hunched against the cold, said, “I can wait out here.”

  An outsider coming to visit a maedel who lived alone could be cause for talk. He was being protective of her reputation. That surprised her. It was odd how many things about Caleb Mast had surprised her in the past few days.

  “You may come in. I’m sure you will remember most of my friends.” She stood aside as he entered. He stopped only a few feet past the doorway as he took in the women seated around her kitchen table. Joy, when she realized there were more people in the room, became shy and hid behind her father.

  Leah made the introductions. “Caleb, this is Joann Yoder, now Joann Weaver.”

  “I remember you from school.”

  “It is goot to see you again.” Joann gave him a welcoming smile.

  “Joann married Roman Weaver a few weeks ago.”

  “Congratulations. I heard about Roman’s accident. I hope he makes a full recovery. Tell him I said hello.”

  “I will.”

  “Next is Sarah Beachy. She is married to Levi Beachy. I don’t believe you have met Rebecca Troyer. She moved to Hope Springs a few years ago from Berlin. Her husband is Gideon Troyer, a cousin of Adam Troyer. This is Caleb Mast. He is Maggie’s youngest.”