Forbidden Paths

by Belden, P. J.

  I didn’t care what this was going to cost me. The fact that he still threw around the word like it meant something pisses me off. I meant nothing to him. Never have I ever meant anything to any of them. NEVER!

  His hand smacks me hard across my face. My head whips to the side, but I refuse to let him see me cry, see that this hurt. Whipping my head back up to glare at him, he gets right in my face.

  “Maybe if you weren’t such a fucking bitch you wouldn’t have it so hard,” he hisses quietly.

  “Maybe if you gave a rat’s ass about someone else other than yourself, you’d see that you are no fucking father. You are an asshole that will be dealt what he’s deserved and I pray that I’m there to see it. Or even better, that I’m the one to give it to you.”

  Turning, I storm up the stairs with my father screaming and ranting behind me. Hurrying down the hall to my room, I slam the door in his face. Beau had always told me that sometimes you have to stand your ground.

  It’s very hard to do that when the ground always seems to meet your face when you do stand up to it. Throwing my purse on my bed, I dig under my pillow and grab out Logan’s picture. It was a picture of us, actually. We were sitting down by the river. I was between his legs with his arms wrapped around me. My head was tilted back looking up at him as he looks down at me. Our noses were touching and you could see the love in his smile.

  Tears fill my eyes. He was my heart. He was my everything. One day, I’ll be free of everything and hopefully it’s not too late to try and win him back. In life, I always set goals for myself. This was my end goal. Disgust my family to leave me the fuck alone and I am able to hopefully win the love of my life back.

  The problem is I worry that I may disgust him too. It was just a bridge I’d have to cross when I got there.

  My phone vibrates in my purse. Pulling it out, I see I have a text from Lia.

  Lia: Those guys loved you. They’ve already called wanting to schedule another go.

  Me: Really?

  Lia: Yeah, that’s awesome. I have a feeling we’re going to make a killing on you.

  Sighing, that’s what I was afraid of. I think it would have been an easier pill to swallow if no one requested me.

  Me: Yay…

  I wonder if she’ll get my sarcasm there.

  Lia: This is what you wanted, remember? Being in high demand means you will make more and possibly get out from under your parents.

  Yeah, it was, she’s right. But it was also more of a chance that Logan will be so disgusted in me that he won’t want me back. That would make all this pointless.

  Me: I know it is, but I worry that this is going to backfire on me and not get me what I’m really doing this for.

  Lia: And what is that?

  Me: Logan…

  Lia: Oh honey. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll get you your man. I promise.

  Me: Someone once told me not to make promises they can’t keep…

  Lia: Guess it’s a good thing I plan on keeping this one. Sweetie, you two deserve to be together. I’ll make sure it happens.

  Me: I love you. Oh, I went off on my male parental unit.

  Lia: Shit! You make sure you text me every so often, so I know you’re okay. You up for going out tomorrow?

  Me: Going out, or another ‘appointment’?

  Lia: You know me too well. Another appointment.

  Me: Sure, tell me where.

  Sometimes I wonder if this was the smartest decision I’ve made. In the end, it’s my only decision. Looking around my room, I sigh. If I cared about being here, I might have made an effort to do something with my room. Instead the walls are empty. The only furniture in the room is my four poster bed with a canopy, dresser, desk and chair, bookshelf, two side tables with lamps, an alarm clock and stereo system.

  The walls were white and my linens purple. The floor was hardwood while the ceiling was the textured shit. At night, when I can’t sleep, I imagine picking each spec of texture off there with a pair of damn tweezers.

  Lying back on my bed, I sigh.

  Lord please let me find my happily ever after with Logan. Please.

  # # #

  I’m standing outside of Ruckers Financial staring up at the very tall building. This was my appointment for the day. Checking my instructions again before entering.

  Go to Ruckers Financial. Ask to speak to Jim. Tell them you’re there for the internship position. Your name is Valarie Schultz.

  Taking a deep breath, I open the doors and walk inside the building. In front of me sat a large desk with the word Information in big letters across the front. Walking up to the desk, I smile sweetly at the man behind it.

  “What can I do for you?”

  “I’m here to speak with Jim for the internship position.”

  “Name?”

  “Valarie Schultz.”

  He types in something on his computer. Asks for my appointment slip and ID. Then looks up at me.

  “Take the elevator to the thirteenth floor. Exit fourth door on the left. You’ll find Mrs. Hollis at a desk. Repeat the information to her.”

  Following his instructions, I’m soon speaking to a very beautiful woman. She’s checking the computer and smiles as she tells me to have a seat.

  Walking over to one of the chairs, I look around the office space and wonder why they have such a big waiting area. Certainly there can’t be that much traffic in here. Standing, I walk over to look out the floor to ceiling windows.

  The bustling Indianapolis showcased below. It wasn’t high enough that my fear of heights went into overdrive, but it did make me nervous. Stepping back slightly, I look at the sky dancing in color as the sun began to set. Off in the distance you can just barely make out the track where the Indie 500 is held.

  When I say barely, I mean you have to know it’s there to know what you’re looking at. I’m standing about five miles from the track. With such a built up area between here and there, it seems so much further.

  My house is about three hours away from here. So when Lia told me where I was going today, I threw a fit. It was a very long drive for a fuck. Lia assured me it will be worth it. We’ll see.

  “Miss Schultz?”

  After a few second delay, forgetting that I was Miss Schultz, I turn and face the woman with a kind smile.

  “Yes,” I say.

  “He’s ready for you now.”

  “Okay, thank you.”

  “Last door at the end of the hall. You can’t miss it.”

  “Thank you,” I smile kindly and head in the direction she told me.

  Knocking on the door, I hear a deep bark of come in. Opening the door, I walk into an oversized office. Why do people need offices this big? When there was more empty space than furniture they could totally size down, in my opinion.

  “Miss Schultz, please close the door,” the man behind the desk says huskily.

  Turning, I do as he asks. Turning back around, he starts walking toward me. Immediately, I have to work to hide a cringe. He’s got to be at least in his fifties. His hair was barely there in a spot on the top of his head, and a little belly that pressed against his dress shirt.

  Yet again, I’m asking myself why I’m doing this.

  “You are even prettier than was described. Undress, now.”

  Setting my jacket on the chair next to me, I start to unbutton my shirt. Lia had given me strict instructions to not wear panties or a bra to meet him. So, as I pulled my shirt off, letting it fall from my shoulders, Jim was greeted with my double D breasts right away.

  He wasted no time either. His mouth and hands were on them the minute they were exposed. Lia told me that even if I’m not into it, which I’m definitely not, I need to pretend I am. So I toss my head back and make a low fake moan.

  His hands move down and lower the zipper of my skirt and it’s soon falling to my feet.

  “Undress me now,” he mumbles around my breast. “Don’t take it all off, but just get it out of the way. I want to feel your han
ds on me.”

  Ick! I didn’t want to feel your body on my hands.

  Pulling his shirt from his slacks, I unbuttoned his shirt revealing just what I thought would be found underneath, hairy flab. This is my twentieth appointment in the past two months. So far, this one is really going to take a lot to get through.

  He moans as I run my hands over his chest. Moving his hand down to the apex of my thigh, his finger pushes inside of me immediately. There was no work up, not trying to get me wet, he just shoves his club right into me.

  My breath hisses through my teeth.

  “Yes, baby, let daddy Jim hear how good I’m making you feel,” he moans.

  Yeah, that’s exactly how he’s making me feel… NOT!

  Pulling his belt open, I unsnap his button and lower the zipper down.

  “Yes, that’s it. Massage me, baby.”

  I resist the urge to shudder as I reach into his pants and pull out his dick. It was small, but I’ll give it to him, he was damn thick. Slowly, I stroke it with my hand. He continues to suckle at my breasts and push his finger in and out of my pussy.

  After a moment, he pulls away and looks me up and down. “Over my desk, now.”

  “Condom or no fun,” I state matter of factly.

  He nods, pulls a condom on and I lean over his desk.

  “Oh fuck, this is just how I envisioned it.”

  He grabs my hips, pushes my legs a little further apart and slams into me. I cry out in pain, but of course he takes it as pleasure. He grips my hips tighter as he continues to fuck me hard and fast.

  “Cum for me baby,” he moans has he reaches around to play with my clit.

  I fake yet another orgasm with yet another man that wasn’t the man I love with all my heart and soul. With each appointment a bigger piece of me chips off and falls to the ground to never be found again.

  “Fuck, yeah,” he moans loudly as he slams into me forcing the desk to slide forward.

  Soon his sweaty nasty body is pressed down on top of me.

  I think I’m going to throw up…

  Pressing several tender kisses across my back, he pulls out of me and begins righting his clothing. I can’t help but rush to do the same. The faster I get out of here the better. The tears were burning the backs of my eyes and I wanted to get out of here before this Jim character saw me.

  “That was amazing Valarie. You must come again.”

  The irony that I haven’t cum at all doesn’t get lost on me, but of course that’s not what he meant.

  “You’ll have to make an appointment, sweetie.”

  I smoothed my hair down, adjusted my coat and I was finally back to the same way I looked when I walked in.

  “Oh, I will be. Now on your way out, will you tell my wife to come here.”

  “Um, who’s your wife?”

  The fucker had a wife!

  “You should have spoken to her when you came in.”

  Oh my God! This guy was a grade A asshole.

  “Sure,” I force out and now I feel like the whore that I am. No amount of justifying myself for this will make this guilt go away. I just helped a man cheat on his wife who was only down the hall.

  Turning, I left the room and go back out the way I came in. Mrs. Hollis smiles at me. I politely tell her that her husband wants her and she wishes me luck and scurries off. Once in my car, I pull out my phone and text Lia

  Me: I’m never doing this guy again. He was fucking married!

  Throwing the phone in the seat next to me, I let the tears fall.

  “What have I become?” I sob as I start my car and head back home.

  Chapter Five

  Logan

  It’s been two months since I’ve seen Faith. It doesn’t seem to be getting any easier. Every day is a struggle to not run back over there to her house and beg her father to let her be with me. Every day, I have to convince myself all over again that it would hurt her more than help her.

  Whatever was going on over there, she wants me no part of.

  The hardest part was reminding myself that I don’t have the right to protect her. She wasn’t mine any longer. It didn’t matter if she held my heart or not, she wasn’t mine.

  “James!”

  I turn my head to see the second shift supervisor walking on site. “Hey, Lee. How’s things going?”

  Joey Lee has been one of my top men since I really took over this construction company. Nothing that has been handed our way has not been conquered between the two of us. He was older than me, but didn’t have that attitude that most of the men here seem to have about working for a younger guy.

  “Just checking in before you leave.”

  “The shipment has been delayed on the timber, but the company is promising it by tomorrow with extras. It’ll work out fine because some of the guys noticed some inconsistencies in the walls on levels B and C. That will need to be addressed immediately.”

  “I’ll make sure that we at least have a projection sheet of what we can do to fix it by the end of my shift. I’ve got the electrician coming today, correct?”

  “Yes, and the plumbing, but because of the issues we are having they are going to find it hard to complete their jobs. At least get them to do the assessment for now.”

  “Sounds good boss. Go on and get home. You look exhausted. All these extra shifts and hours you’ve been pulling is catching up to you,” he says, concerned.

  “Thanks. I’ve got to get my brothers to their practices, but eventually I’ll do that thing you call sleep,” I joke.

  “I think it’s amazing what you’ve done for your brothers.”

  Feeling uncomfortable as I always do when people praise me on raising my brothers, I brush it off. “It’s no big thing. If I didn’t step up, who would?”

  Quickly gathering up some plans and my briefcase, I start walking toward the door.

  “It may be no big deal to you, but it could be a huge thing for them. Either way, I’m sure your dad would be real proud of you.”

  Oh yeah, did I mention that the company I’ve now taken over is the same company that my father was working for. Joey here, was very close with my dad. My dad was his supervisor and taught him everything he knows. He was still pretty young himself, but not as young as me (which I remind him of often). Dad talked about him a lot. So hearing him say that, made my heart swell with pride.

  “I hope so,” I mumble.

  “He is. Now go get some sleep. If you need anything…”

  “I know man. Thanks.”

  Heading out the door, I climb into my car. Right there on the visor was a picture of the only woman I’ll ever love. She was lying down in my arms asleep after we made love for the first time. Her hair was messed up in a sexy way. Shaking my head, I start the car and head home.

  “Landon!” I yell the minute I open the door. “Come on buddy, we’ve got to get you to wrestling practice. Lucas! Are you ready for basketball practice?”

  Hurrying up to my room, I throw my stuff on my bed and head into the bathroom. A quick shower, I slip on some regular clothes. Running back down the stairs, I quickly slip my shoes on and grab a snack from the cupboard.

  The guys are waiting on me at the door. Soon we are on our way.

  “Are you mad at us for something?” Landon asks from the backseat.

  “What?” I glance at him in the rearview mirror. “Why would you think I was mad at you?”

  “You’ve been working a lot. We never see you anymore,” he says sadly.

  My heart is breaking for my little brother. Landon is the only one out of all of them that can rip me to shreds in a single statement.

  “Buddy, I’m just trying to keep us in the black is all. Everything that we do costs money and I want to make sure we have the money to do all that.”

  “Well, I’ll quit wrestling if you want,” he meets my eyes in the mirror.

  “No, buddy. You love wrestling. I’m not letting you quit. How about we go camping this weekend? I’ll take Friday through Mo
nday off and we’ll go out and just be us for the weekend. How’s that sound?”

  His face lights up. “Yeah! Let’s go camping!”

  The rest of the drive was in silence, well as silent as I could get my brothers after announcing the impromptu camping trip.

  Soon we are pulling into the recreation center. Thankfully, both Landon and Lucas practiced here. It made it easier attending both their practices.

  Lan and Luke hurry ahead and run into their prospective areas. Bracing myself against the wall for a breath, I close my eyes.

  “Logan?”

  Opening my eyes, I find a petite blonde woman standing in front of me. “Yeah?”

  “You don’t remember me, do you?”

  “No, I’m sorry. I can’t say I do.”

  She laughs softly. “I’m Tiffany Loots,” she smiles and ran her eyes up and down my body.

  I remember her now. She was this lanky nerd in school. She’s really changed now if her breasts, curves and toned body were anything to say about it.

  “Wow, you’ve changed,” I mutter. “Sorry that was rude.” I say shaking my head.

  “No, it’s okay. I know I have. You’ve changed a lot too. What happened to you?”

  “After my dad died, I had to raise my brothers. School got in the way.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. You know, I always had a little crush on you in school,” she says shyly.

  My stomach turns. “Oh. Hey, I’m not trying to be rude here, but I’m in love with someone and really am not on the market.”

  She giggles, tossing her wavy blonde hair over her shoulder. “I’m not wanting to date, Logan. Honestly, practice will be going on for a little while. We could have some fun.”

  I cough. “You’re serious? You’re asking a guy that didn’t even recognize you to have sex with you because you had a crush on them in high school?”

  It was rude yes, but frankly it shocks me that she’s asking me this. The fact that her barely contained breasts weren’t springing my dick into action shocks me even more. To go nineteen years without sex, it didn’t faze me then. But after being with Faith, she’s all I see and now it’s not working right.