Forbidden Paths

by Belden, P. J.

  Even as I nod my head yes, I can’t stop the tears or the panic that consumes me. The possibility I may be reliving one of the worst moments in my life.

  “Okay, Ms. Harper. Can you lie on the bed and pull your shirt up?”

  She proceeds again to do another ultrasound. Again, she’s not talking to us, but focusing on the screen before her. My heart rate has not slowed in the slightest. Currently I have a vice grip on Logan’s hand. Occasionally, he’ll kiss my head and whisper something, but I’m freaking out too much to know exactly what he says.

  “Wow,” Logan breathes staring at the screen. “That’s my baby,” he looks down at me with a smile so big it looks to almost split his face and shimmering eyes, “our baby.”

  Even through my panic, I couldn’t help but smile. The joy in his eyes and on his face was enough to break through the panic. Suddenly the sound of a rapidly beating heart fills the silence. A tear trickles down his cheek. It’s all becoming real for him. He’s a dad and he can see it now. It’s no longer just words. Logan finally has the visual.

  After a few more moments, she’s setting down everything as she finally starts to speak. “The reason I was coming here today is because we’ve gotten some results back from the scan I did when you first arrived here as well as blood results. Now it will be a few days before I get the results back from this scan, so I can’t speak certainly on the matter. However, I will tell you this to put you at a bit of ease. You are having twins,” she smiles as she stands up. “Congratulations. I have your cell phone, Mr. James. I’ll call as soon as I have something.”

  “Th-thank you,” he stutters through his answer.

  She left without another word. I turn and look at Logan who seems to be frozen in spot.

  “Loga-” I start to say.

  His lips cut off what I was going to say and he’s kissing me harder than he’s kissed me in a while. Before I know what’s happening, he’s stripping our clothes off and we are making love. It was tender, sweet, loving, and I was lost immediately. All my fears of this being too much for him were gone.

  The feeling of him sliding in and out of me, murmuring how much he loves me calms me completely. He completes me. In a way I’ll never have anywhere else. Logan was my forever.

  # # #

  Logan

  Calling out Faith’s name as we fall over the edge together, I’ve never felt this happy before. I’m going to be a father. A father of twins. You’d think I’d be freaking out, but I’m not. I’m over the moon excited.

  Lying next to Faith, I gently brush the hair out of her face. She smiles lazily up at me. This is her at her most beautiful, I think. Sated, happy, relaxed, with her messed up hair and flushed face, is a breathtaking sight to behold.

  “Have I told you how much I love you lately?”

  She blushes, shaking her head side to side with a smirk and a wink. “But I could never hear it enough.”

  “And I could never tell you enough. Faith, you are my world and you always have been. I’d jump through fire for you if it’d bring a smile to your face. There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for you.”

  “It’s the same for me. I’m so sor…”

  Placing a quick kiss to her lips, I cut her off. “Don’t. We aren’t thinking of the past remember?”

  She nods her head and cuddles into my side. Stroking her hair, she falls asleep in no time. Twins. I smile. I’m going to have twins. It’s like God was giving us back what we lost. It was this thought that had me climbing carefully from the bed and dressing.

  As I stand there looking down at the beautiful woman fast asleep that holds the only key to my heart, I know she’s going to be so pissed at me for what I’m about to do, but I can’t sit back and let her handle it. Especially not now.

  Kissing her one last time on her forehead, I leave the room to search for my brothers. Did I have a plan? Not really, but I was going to fake my way through it the best I can. Only thing stopping me right now was my brothers. If I’m going to get off this island without Faith finding out, I need their help.

  Levi was sitting at the counter with his hands in his hair. He looked broken. Leif said he was blaming himself for what happened to Faith.

  “Levi?”

  His head snaps up and he looks at me with wide eyes. “Man I’m so sorry. I’m so freaking sorry. We were playing and I didn’t think…”

  “She’s fine. The babies are fine. I got to see them on the portable ultrasound machine. I can’t believe it. I’m going to be a dad. What did I ever do so right to be rewarded with Faith and our kids?”

  “Brother, you are…” He cuts off and shakes his head. “Babies? Did you say babies?”

  My smile widens as I nod my head. “We’re having twins.” Even I could hear the pride and happiness in my voice.

  “Wow,” he breathes, shaking his head some more.

  “Listen, I need to talk to you guys. There’s something I need your help with.”

  “Lanny’s outside in the pool. I’ll send him out to collect the other two.”

  Levi stands and quickly heads outside to talk to Lanny. I make a grocery list while I’m at it. When I head back, I’m going to send Beau back out here with food supplies.

  Twins… Man nothing in the world can bring me down right now.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Logan

  “But that’s why I need all of your help. No I don’t have a plan and sure it sounds stupid as hell to do this, but I can’t let my children be born with this cloud hanging over our family. Please don’t argue with me on this.”

  Levi is pacing at this point and Leif is looking pretty pissed himself. They were acting like they were the older sibling here.

  “Look, I’m not here asking for permission. I’m here asking you to help protect your future nieces or nephews.”

  They all stare at me as if I’ve lost my mind. Maybe I have. This was completely crazy, but the fucker knows where I live. There’s no way I’m going to be bring my children home and have something to happen to them or Faith. Honestly, I’d die for them if that’s what it took to keep them safe.

  “Using your kids as leverage is not cool man,” Leif says.

  “I’m not trying to use them as leverage. I’m trying to get you guys to see that this fucker, this sick, twisted, psycho knows where my house is, knows where Faith and I will live and soon our kids. I can’t take them there. The only way to handle this is to deal with it. We can’t live here forever.”

  Running my hands through my hair for the millionth time since I started talking to them all. How can I make them see? How can I get them on board?

  Sighing, “I understand your concerns here, but I’m not the one you need to be concerned with. It should be Faith who’s carrying my kids, your family. Please. I have to do this, but I can’t do it without your help.”

  My brothers look back and forth between each other. They were almost having a silent conversation between the four of them. This was a hard decision to ask of them to do this, but it was the only solution I had. Finally, Levi stands up and walks over to me.

  “Okay, listen. This is the only way I’ll agree to this. Do you understand?”

  “Fine whatever.”

  I’d agree to anything at this point.

  “We’ll keep Faith safe here and try to keep her busy so she don’t realize you’re off trying to play hero.”

  I start to thank him, but he cuts me off.

  “But! You will take two of my bodyguards and notify the police of what is going on.”

  “Now wait a second,” I start.

  Levi crosses his arms across his chest and gives me a stern look. “It’s these terms or nothing. After all, you’re asking us to lie to Faith.”

  Involuntary, I step back from the impact of the realization from what I am asking them to do. God, I’m lying to Faith. Shaking my head, no I had to do this.

  “Okay,” I reluctantly agree. “I’ll agree to your terms. I’m not sure how I’m going to pull this
off, but fine. Who’s going with me?”

  “Give me a few minutes to call and see if I can get the guys in on such short notice.” Levi walks off as he gets on the phone.

  Bracing myself on the counter, I try to calm my nerves. This is not how I pictured things would go when I would picture finding Faith again…

  Tired from a long’s day work, I head out of the house to go restock my fridge. The boys were all home for a week and now I’m literally left with nothing but maybe barely a drink of milk and a stray grape. All I’d like to do right now is flop on my sofa and watch some meaningless dribble on the television while I drift off to sleep.

  But thanks to my bottomless pit brothers, instead I’m headed out to the store to buy more food. I swear while they were here, I was at the store what seemed like daily. It hasn’t been that long since Landon left home, but somehow in that short amount of time I’ve forgotten how much they can freaking eat.

  Of course food shopping is not the only thing I’ll have to do. Cleaning. I’m damn sure that while I was sweating my balls off at work, they’ve left my house trashed. Don’t get me wrong, they help me, but when it comes to leaving… They leave everything and fly out of the house like a bat out of hell. What can I say, they’re boys.

  Pulling into the parking lot of Jespie’s Supermarket, I groan as my body complains from the movement. Just as I shut the door, my keys fell from my hand to the ground. Cursing under my breath, I bend down and grab my keys. Standing I turn around and run right into someone.

  “Shit! I’m so sorry,” I apologize quickly. “I didn’t see…” I trail off as I see the very vision that has haunted my dreams for so long. “Faith?”

  She looks up then and freezes. Her eyes widen, just staring at me. “L-l-logan?”

  “How, uh, how are you?” I ask after a moment of staring in shock to see her after so long.

  “I’ve, um, okay,” she stutters.

  “Well, nice seeing you,” I force out after the last moment we spent together flashes through my head.

  Her eyes close as she nods her head. Forcing myself to walk past her and toward the store doors, I try to put her out of my mind. She broke my heart when she walked away from me that day. I was willing to lay my world at her feet, but she didn’t care enough to fight for me, for us. There’s no way I’m going to give her a second chance to do it again. Yet, even as I think this, I find myself turning around and running back out to the parking lot.

  Just across the way, I see her. Yelling her name, I run after her. After the fourth time of screaming her name, she turns around. As I get closer to her, I see tear streaks down her face. Unable to stop myself, the minute I get near her, I claim her lips with mine in a fierce kiss.

  Her hands fist in my shirt as a moan escapes her mouth…

  Leif breaks into my daydream about how I’d envisioned seeing Faith again.

  “I’m in full agreement that you need to get this psycho off your backs, but are you sure this is a good idea?”

  “Honestly? No, I’m not. But it’s all I have to go with. This needs to be behind us. We can’t hide for the rest of our lives. Faith has done enough of that. She deserves to not have to look over her shoulder all the damn time. I’ll do whatever I have to in order to give that to her.”

  Squeezing my shoulder, Leif says quietly, “So will we.”

  After what seems like forever, but was only minutes, Levi walks back into the room. “Okay Tack and Sonny will meet you at the house and pretend as if they are stopping by to catch up with their old high school friend. Before they even get to your house, they’re going to call the police and go over their plan, so you’ll have that option. Now, here’s the possible semi problem that Tack brought to my attention.”

  “What’s that,” I ask confused.

  “None of us know who this guy is and what he’s into. Do you have a name?”

  “Tony, uh, Tony D’luca, I believe.”

  Lucas shoots to his feet. “What!”

  We all turn in his direction, shocked by his outburst. “What? Do you know who he is?”

  “Yeah we all do,” he says in a tone that indicates that insinuates that we should all know who he is.

  All of us look at each other and shrug as Luke storms out of the room doing God knows what before re-entering moments later. Setting his laptop down on the counter, several clicks and types later, he spins the computer around for the rest of us to see.

  “Do you remember him now?”

  We all look at the computer screen and start scrolling through a website on this man. With each picture, each article only fuels my anger more. This man had his hands on my woman. I’m pissed.

  Suddenly, Levi curses loudly. “Son of a bitch!”

  “What?” I ask unable to take my eyes away from the computer.

  “This is the fucker that trashed that job site that Dad was working on a week before the accident.”

  Time froze. My blood chilled immediately. I remember my dad coming home pissed beyond pissed. That whole week, his whole team had to work almost double their normal hours to try and make up for what was trashed. We never found out why it was trashed, but a security guard identified him to the police. However, at the end of the week, we lost our dad. Suddenly, who trashed that site didn’t matter anymore. We just lost our second parent so close together.

  Life was a whirlwind after that and I pushed that out of my mind. My focus flipped to where it needed to be, to take care of my brothers. Now turning and looking back at the man that has hurt the love of my life and took my father from me, the chill left my body as my blood began to boil.

  “I’m going to kick his fucking ass for Dad and Joey,” I growl darkly.

  “I think I might be coming with you,” Levi growls.

  “How did you recognize him?” Landon asks.

  Luke looks down before looking at me. “The old bat kept yelling about the whole thing shaking papers around. Well, once you had decided to take over custody of us, I stole the papers. I looked through them. His picture was in there,” he shrugs.

  “Why didn’t you tell us about this sooner?” I ask as calmly as I can.

  Realizing now why that name sounded so familiar when Faith first mentioned it days ago. Anger rumbles through me fiercely as I realize exactly what she’s been up against all on her own. This man was bad, extremely bad, news.

  “After all that’s gone on, I’d forgotten all about it.”

  “This is all more the reason I need to get this guy out of her life for good,” I say after a while of silence.

  “Well, everything’s set into play. The plane is on its way here. Should be here in a few hours. The real question is how you’re going to get out of here without Faith knowing.”

  That was the big question indeed. I really didn’t like the idea of lying to her, but if it meant that she was safe and sound away from the danger, was it worth it? This could be something that pissed her off enough that she’d never trust me again. Again I’m asking myself, is it worth the risk?

  Looking my four brothers in the eyes, I square my shoulders. “I’m going to tell her I’m going to go shopping. She has to stay behind because the doctor said no flying after the belly flop incident. You guys will keep her entertained until I get back. Please don’t let her hate me,” I mumble the last sentence.

  Leif walks up and places his hand on my shoulder. “She’s going to be pissed as hell at you. If you’re going in this thinking otherwise then you’re dumber than I thought.”

  We all talk for a little while longer before I head back upstairs to spend time with Faith before I leave. As I walk in the door, I can see her on the bed still asleep. The sheet that lay across her hung on her curves, but it was one curve that holds my attention. She had a baby bump.

  Walking quietly to the bed, I gently sat down next to her. My hand rests on her belly and my heart stutters. My kids are under my hand. The sight of the bump and feeling it under my hand cemented in my heart the reason I’m doing this. I will n
ot look back.

  “Hard to believe, isn’t it?”

  “What is, baby?”

  “That one moment sadness and heartbreak was all we knew. Now, here we are with each other and starting a family. It’s all so surreal. And scary,” she whispers.

  “Why scary?”

  “I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop, you know? Things just seem too perfect right now.” She shrugs and moves to sit up.

  Moving up next to her, I pull her to my chest and cradle her there. I’m not a stupid man. There’s a good chance this could be the last time I hold her. And if it is, I’m making damn sure I cherish every second of it.

  “I’d hardly call this perfect, baby. But I know what you mean. When’s the rug going to be pulled out from under us and send us to our asses?” I say hating myself more and more because I’m the one going to pull the rug out from under her.

  We lay there not speaking, just holding each other. My heart was racing as the time nears closer for when I have to walk away from her.

  I’m protecting her. Saving her from this vile man that wants nothing more than to hurt her, she’ll see that eventually… I hope.

  What seems like no time later, there’s a soft knock at the door.

  “Yeah,” I say softly, feeling Faith’s deep breathing.

  Levi pokes his head through the door. “The plane’s here.”

  I nod my head and slowly move myself out from under Faith. She stirs.

  “Where are you going Logan?”

  “It’s my turn to go grocery shopping. I’ll be back here before you know it. Just stay here and rest.”

  She starts to rise up in the bed. “I’ll go with you. Just give me a second to get dressed.”

  “No, remember the doctor said you can’t fly right now. Just rest. I’ll be back soon,” I force out hating myself more for lying to her again.

  Fay looks up at me with her big sad eyes and my heart breaks, nearly causing me to cave and tell her everything. Almost. Cupping her face in my hands, I kiss her with all the love I feel and commit every bit of her kiss, smell, body, image to my memory.