by Lila Rose
The blame was on me for him screwin’ up so many women. The knowledge fuckin’ burned.
Frank shook his head in answer.
“Good. End it.”
Once out the door, we walked down the hall and stairs before I looked to Dodge and asked, “Can we make sure he follows through?”
I’ll set up cameras. Beast signed.
Dodge nodded. “I’ll get some brothers on what fucked-up Frank did in the woods behind here. Make sure it doesn’t happen again and help those women who want it. And we’ll watch Frank closely to see who he communicates with. See if we can find out who this client is. I just don’t understand something. Why didn’t you kill him? He was gonna take your girl and hand her over to some sick fuck.”
“Whoever this client is will want retaliation for taking down one of his guys. He’ll realise we ain’t an easy target, so our best bet for him to get what he wants was to leave Frank alive so he can take it out on that old man.”
“Well, shit. You do have a brain,” Billy joked, at least I fuckin’ hoped it was one.
After raising my middle finger in his face, we made our way into the kitchen, where I found my mum in tears. She sat at the table with Dive standing beside her, his hand on her shoulder. She must’a heard us coming because she stood once we entered. With her hand clasped to her chest, regret shone in her eyes.
“I’m sorry—”
“Mum, don’t. It ain’t your fault.”
“I let you leave and stay away because I wanted to protect you from his world.”
“Now all you gotta do is worry about you. Want you outta his life, Ma. Can you do that for me?”
“Yes,” she whispered. “I’ve missed out on so much from your life because of him, but I won’t anymore…. That is if you’ll want me in your life?”
Taking the steps I needed, I was in front of her and pullin’ her in my arms. “I shouldn’ta left you either. You’ve always been a part of my life, but I just didn’t tell you. Sorry for not reachin’ out.” Her arms came around my waist. “What you gonna do?”
“Leave him. Something I should have done a long time ago but didn’t have the strength to do it. Not until now.”
Nodding, I shifted her back to meet her sad eyes. “I’ll have some brothers stay while you pack, but I gotta get outta this place.”
“I understand.”
Fuck me. I was the biggest dick to have left my life behind and let Mum stay with poison.
“Don’t,” she muttered. “Don’t blame yourself. I was weak, but no longer.”
“We’ll talk soon, yeah?”
She offered me a shaky smile. “I would like that, and to meet my grandchild.”
“Done.” Leanin’ in, I kissed her cheek and looked to Pick and Billy. “Can—”
“We got this, brother.”
With a chin lift, I said, “Thanks. Take one of their cars. Fill it with what she needs and get her to a hotel.”
“On it.”
Glancing to my mum, I said, “See you soon.”
“I look forward to it.”
Spinning, I walked from the room with Beast, Dodge, and Dive. As soon as we got outside, I took a lungful of air, my hands clasping at the back of my head.
“You good, brother?” Dive asked.
“Thought I’d left that life behind. Realised I shouldn’t have for her sake.”
“She’s strong, even if she said she was weak. I don’t think any of Frank’s shit touched her. Loved her enough to keep it hidden from her.”
“She’s a lot younger than him. Still got time to be happy. Truly happy,” Dodge said.
“Yeah.” I nodded, dropping my arms to my sides.
“You need sleep, brother. Beast will take you back. Mena will have Nevaeh for the day, rest easy.”
“No—”
“Brother. Fuckin’ lotta shit to absorb. Let it sink, deal, and then come get your girl.” Dive knocked his fist into my arm.
The offer was great, one I wanted to take, but I needed to have my girl back. See she was safe. A tap on my arm had me turned to Beast.
Got to board up her window. Organise some more security on the house and bars to the windows. Let’s get the house set before we bring her back.
Shit, he was right.
Sighing, I nodded, and after thanking my brothers, I started for Beast’s car.
Beast
He was exhausted and even after we got home, he didn’t rest. He straightened Nevaeh’s room and then boarded up her window while I put in cameras outside. Hell, maybe every brother should have cameras at their homes, not just the compound. Never knew what in the hell could happen, and prevention was better than anything. Somethin’ I’d suggest at the next church. I already had a security system, but I hadn’t activated it because I’d still been awake at the time of the attack.
Christ. What a night.
It was early hours before I stumbled in the front door, with Vin at my side, to find Knife coming outta Nevaeh’s room with a bag of rubbish, probably the broken glass. His expression pinched with thoughts he shouldn’t be havin’. I knew they’d be about his arse of a father, and his mum. Regret would be front and centre, and he’d also be pissed at himself for wantin’ to live a life of his own without his family’s shit draggin’ him under.
I knew the feelin’.
My dad was the dick, and my mum the one who put up with him because she thought she loved him. When I’d left, she’d picked him over havin’ anything to do with me. Exactly like Mrs Conger. Only I wasn’t sure Knife saw it like that—his mum choosing the evil over her own child. He was blaming himself for leavin’ her. Maybe one day he’d see it. Then again, I didn’t really want him to.
He’d be better off having his mum in his life now than never having her at all.
If she came through with what she promised, leavin’ her husband and gettin’ back in Knife’s life, then I’d leave it be, but if she didn’t, I’d want Knife to see he wasn’t to blame.
I reached out to his arm then signed once I had his attention. You got to get some hours of shut-eye.
He nodded, but then headed straight into the living room and then into the kitchen.
Damn, was I gonna have to tie him to his bed?
Hell. That thought went right to my cock and the kiss we’d shared on the couch. Lookin’ to the couch, my dick jerked in my jeans.
Shakin’ my head, I rubbed a hand over my face. I needed some sleep.
Kiss me.
That was what he’d said.
Kiss me.
When he touched his lips to mine, I was goddamn shocked. My body had frozen, and I hadn’t realised I wasn’t dreamin’ until his tongue reached out to play.
Then it was on.
Kiss me.
Words I wished I could have heard instead of seen.
Reachin’ down, I glided my hand over Vin’s head and down his back, causin’ his tail to wag. He’d been pissed earlier when I’d left him at home. I was lucky it didn’t last, and he was happy to see me when I’d walked in the front door with Knife a few hours ago.
Two booted feet came into view. Knife stood in front of me. Time to sleep, brother. He nodded. Just a couple of hours, then you can call the guy about bars, and then go get your girl.
What are you gonna do?
See to some cameras at your dad’s place.
Thanks, Beast.
What I’d give for him to sign my real name. Jesus, another word I wished I could have heard fall from his lips, just before he kissed me, or while we were kissing. If he’d muttered it against my lips, I would have been fine with that or when I’d slowly rocked my cock…. Christ, abort thoughts. It was time to crash.
“Gonna get a shower in first,” Knife added and fucked my head up even more.
Knife stripped slowly outta his clothes in front of me. He gave me a smirk over his shoulder and slid his pants down his legs.
Blinking, I stumbled back a step, my cock hard as fuck behind my jeans.
&n
bsp; Sleep. I needed sleep.
And to maybe tug one off.
Right, you take the bathroom—or me—and I’ll grab one later. I ignored the trembling of my hands as I signed.
“Done,” he responded with a smile.
Fuck me to hell.
His smile always shot right to my cock. It wasn’t exactly the time for it when I was already so goddamn gone from my thoughts. I just knew I was leakin’ pre-cum. Knife’s eyes flashed wide.
Shit. Did I moan?
Kiss me. I urged with my mind. Only he didn’t. Instead, he smirked as if he found somethin’ funny and then walked past me and brushed his shoulder against mine. His scent stayed with me even though he kept walking down the hall. I was sure it was a record of mine with how fast I’d made it into my own room with the door shut, and while Vin stretched out on the floor, I tore off my clothes from my heated body and lay back on top of the sheets with my cock in my hand.
It wouldn’t take me long.
I was primed and ready from only thinkin’ of Knife and that kiss.
Fuck. I couldn’t stop myself even if I wanted to. I needed to come.
I stroked up and down my length. A thrill deep inside of me had my head pushing back into my pillow and a groan falling from my lips.
Images of Knife naked in the shower flashed in my mind. I’d seen enough of him topless and with his pants down in the past to know what he looked like. His strong build, his sleek tattooed skin as he pounded into a woman, where I wished it was me, and since it was my fantasy, I replaced the fuckin’ woman with myself.
He’d bend me over something, eager to get my pants down around my ankles where his hands would come down on my hips while the tip of his cock jutted out and between my arse cheeks.
Ah, fuck me. My load shot up and out the tip of my cock before I even got to the good part.
Knife
I’d just turned the water off when I heard Beast groan from his room next door. Bloody hell, he was jerkin’ off, and I knew, goddamn knew, I would be starring in his thoughts while he touched himself. I’d seen the outline of his erection in his jeans and heard the moan fall from his lips after I’d smiled.
Shit, if I’d known my smile was gonna make him pop a stiffy, I’d have to remember to smile all the time to mess with him.
Turning the shower back on, since my dick was pointing to the moon after hearing Beast groan and thinkin’ of him touching himself, something I never thought I’d get hard over, I rested my hand against the back wall and took my cock in hand. The spray of warm water slid down my body and warmed my cool skin.
An image of Beast walkin’ in on me while I jerked off, and offering to help, had my balls already tightening. Christ, I was hot for the dude and liked it more than picturing a woman.
Go fuckin’ figure.
What drew the cum from my body was an image of Beast stripping down, hopping in the shower and takin’ my cock in his mouth.
Catchin’ my breath, I opened my eyes and grinned.
Yeah, if the crap was behind me with Frank, I’d be steppin’ up my moves on Beast.
All I had to do was hope he liked them.
Chapter Seventeen
Knife
Google was not my friend. I thought I’d check out ways to impress the guy you wanted. I even typed in “to impress the gay guy you wanted,” which I was fuckin’ proud of myself for doin’. Thought it’d help me get ready to approach Beast with what I wanted.
Plain and simple. I wanted him.
At least I thought I did.
Nope, I did. It’d been a few days since the shit went down, hearing nothing from it, and it seemed life still couldn’t give me a break. We’d either been too tired to talk or busy with other shit that we missed each other at times in the house.
So when I was alone one night and Nevaeh was asleep, I fired up Google and searched for a few things. Some men liked an alpha male. When I looked up to see what that was, I realised both Beast and I were alpha. Hell, to me we were. Not like I was gonna drop into Dive’s and ask if he thought I was an alpha. It said some men liked a manscaped man. Again, when I searched what in the fuck that meant, I saw clean, trimmed, some shaved pubes and, fuck me, arses.
Did that mean I needed to do that?
Did Beast like a man trimmed or nothing at all down there?
I was confused as fuck and had no one to talk to.
Hell, I hadn’t ever cared if women thought I was the hairiest motherfucker before, so why was I worried and caring what Beast thought?
Shit. Did Ben trim?
Then to make matters worse, I saw some even waxed down there. Waxed. Like some women did. I didn’t want to look like a little boy when Beast went down there. I was certain it would be when not if Beast went down there. I’d gone to bed each night jerking off to fantasies of Beast and me, and they were gettin’ hotter and hotter. Shit, I was comin’ faster and faster each time, so that was another worry.
Would I blow my load before I got any action from the guy?
That’d be pitiful.
As the day went on, I kept thinking about trimming or doin’ something to make my junk look presentable. I couldn’t just dump it on a plate and offer him a bite to eat.
Or could I?
Nope, I had to go all out.
Besides, if women could do what I was about to, I totally could.
Shaking my head, I called the only person I knew who’d keep their mouth shut, who was sweet, gentle, and understanding.
“Knife,” Mena whispered, stepping closer to my side with Koda in her arms. “I’m scared.”
Groaning, I pushed the stroller with Nevaeh in it back and forward while I snapped at Mena, “Woman, do not do this shit to me. You’ll freak me out.”
“Maybe you should just go to Julian?” she suggested. I’d just told her why we’d met at the beauty place and she’d paled. The woman paled. That was not a goddamn good sign.
“No way in hell am I going to Julian. He’d probably wanna make a clay model outta my junk because it’s so awesome.”
Her eyes were wide with fear, and every time I caught sight of them, my gut would clench. She cleared her throat and asked, “Tell me again why you want to do this?”
Shrugging, I rubbed the back of my neck and muttered, “Just want to tidy up down there. Thought if women could do it, I don’t see why I can’t.”
She reached out and placed her hand on my arm. “I’m sure Beast will like it down there without doing this. You need to run, Knife. Run out of this store right now.”
Holy fuck. Now I was starting to sweat as panic set in.
A little wax couldn’t hurt.
Could it?
“Ah, who said anything about Beast?” I snorted. “Why would I do anything for him?” I scoffed. “This is for all the lady admirers. Yeah, the ladies.” I nodded.
Fuck, why would she say Beast?
It wasn’t obvious, was it?
Hell, how could it be? I didn’t go around drooling over the guy or carrying around his junk in my hand like a prized trophy.
“Mr Conger?”
My heart jumped, along with my body, at my name being called.
“Knife,” Mena whispered, “it’s not too late to back out.”
Turning my head to her, I glared. “It’s obvious you were the wrong person to come along for moral support.”
She nodded. Christ, she agreed with me. “I’ve had a bad experience, Knife.”
“You’re coming in with me.”
“What?” she yelled, then covered her mouth with her hand and shook her head. Koda laughed at her and then yelled “what?” also. “No.”
“Yes,” I gritted and grabbed her arm in one hand while I steered the stroller with the other over to the Chinese lady waiting for us.
“This is no sexual time. She can wait with children.” The lady smiled.
Why in the fuck would she think it was “sexual” time in the first place? I was about to tear my pubes from my body. Did she think
I’d want head while gettin’ it done?
Fuck me.
Mena straightened. “I’m here for moral support.” Hell, I was proud of her for standing up and taking charge.
The woman eyed us and pointed at Mena. “Your clothes stay on.”
What in the ever lovin’ fuck do people get up to while gettin’ waxed?
“Mrs Chang,” another woman called before stepping up to our side. “This isn’t like the place you used to work in. No one comes in here for anything… um, sexual.”
Mrs Chang thumped her forehead with her palm. “So sorry. I forgot not working at Blow Joe’s any longer.” Then she turned and went through the door.
The other lady turned to us. “I’m so flippin’ sorry. I was in need of a waxer, and she came in at the right time. Do you want me to mind the munchkins while you both go in there?”
“No,” I clipped.
“Yes,” Mena said. “Um, Knife. It’s not like she’ll steal them.”
“Oh, I won’t. I’ll take them into the break room right across from you both. I’ll even leave the door open so you can see them. No other appointments are scheduled right now, so no one else will be back there.”
Sighing, I nodded. We walked down the hall. The woman pointed into the right room, and I watched her take the stroller into the left room, leaving the door open like she said, and then she came back for Koda, who happily went into her arms. Guess it was good Nevaeh was asleep so she couldn’t kick up a stink. She wasn’t happy with strangers, seemed to only wanna take to me, Beast, Dive, and Mena.
Mrs Chang clapped her hands and then rubbed them together. “You get pants off.”
Glancing to Mena, I chuckled and said, “Babe, think Dive will kill me if I let you see my awesomeness?”