Courtin' Jayd

by L. Divine

  “What are you doing when you braid, girl? Should I be scared?” she says, holding her head in her hands. I smack her in the back of the head with a towel before draping her neck with it. What could I possibly do to someone while braiding his or her head?

  “A whole lot if you master that skill,” my mom says, invading our conversation. “You know Netta’s got skills like Mama does when it comes to braiding hair. That’s why they work so well together, even if they are nosy and controlling.”

  Mom, not now. I’m doing Shawntrese’s hair, I think back. Shawntrese is now talking about the videos on the television. But while my mom’s in my head, I can’t concentrate on much else.

  “Oh girl, please. You can walk and chew bubble gum at the same time,” my mom says, not leaving me alone. “You need to study that part of your lessons tonight before you get too deep into doing other people’s heads. You think Rah’s girl is crazy for caring about you braiding his head but I know you know better.”

  “How did you know about that?” I ask, skillfully responding to Shawntrese’s inquiries while simultaneously twisting up her hair. My mom’s right: I can do two things at once.

  “Don’t worry about all that. Take my advice Jayd. There are many things to consider before taking on this line of work, being a young priestess such as yourself. There’s power in everything you do, especially this. You need to perform cleansings on your client and yourself before and after you do their hair and all kinds of other things you need to learn about. It’s all in the book and Netta can help you apply it practically.”

  “Yeah, if she gives me the job. Mama doesn’t seem to want me to have it.”

  “Well, Mama has her reasons but it’s an unavoidable part of your path. Williams women were doing hair before we came to this country and got the last name Williams,” my mom says. “I feel like our ancestors who did hair on the plantation and that isn’t a good feeling. You and Mama got the gift of our other ancestors who felt the power in it. I say embrace it, just be careful. Haters come in all walks of life. And make sure you don’t leave hair all over my dining room.”

  “Jayd, are you listening to me?” Shawntrese says, looking at me through the mirror. My mom leaves me to contemplate her words and finish my job. I have a lot of work to do tonight, which is perfect. All I feel like doing is curling up on the couch and chilling. I’ll send Rah a quick text to let him know he won’t be seeing me at the session this evening. I’ve got to focus on my lineage if I’m going to help anyone out, including myself.

  “Yeah girl, I hear you,” I say, wiping the aloe vera gel mixture I make especially for natural hairstyles like this one off my hands and onto her towel. “Let me send this message while I’m thinking about it and then I’m all yours.” I grab my cell from the table and locate Rah’s last message, hitting reply.

  I’ve got a lot of studying to do, Rah. I’ll check you in the morning. Peace.

  “So like I was saying, do you think Beyoncé’s prettier with short hair or long hair?” Shawntrese says, eyeing her transition in the video on BET. “I like the weave but she’s rocking it cut too.”

  “I like the lyrics. She’s singing my feelings right now,” I say as I sing along to “Me, Myself and I” while Shawntrese joins in. Rah responds to my message instantly. I don’t want to go back and forth with him all day but I do want to know how he’s feeling. I’ve already got gel on my hands so my client will have to help me out.

  “Can you check my phone please?” I ask Shawntrese, who gladly grabs the buzzing cell off the table.

  “It says, ‘You can’t avoid me forever. I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon to take you home. I love you girl.’ You’ve got this boy sprung, girl. Are you sure you’re still a virgin?”

  “Yes, and as crazy as these girls and boys are out here, I’m staying this way for a long, long time.” It’s bad enough the mental games get us into our fair share of drama, but the physical ramifications of messing with the wrong person are also too much for me to deal with. I’d hate to be in Mickey’s, Tania’s, and Sandy’s shoes right now. All of their problems have one element in common: getting caught up because they had sex with the wrong dude. I’m staying on this side of that rope for as long as I can.

  9

  Let It Burn

  “Let it burn, let it burn, let it burn.”

  —USHER

  After Shawntrese leaves, I clean up the dining room and start dinner while watching this old white man on PBS talk about following certain laws to attract goodness in life. He makes it sound like a guaranteed formula that will work for anyone. If life were that easy people wouldn’t need to come to Mama for help. Jeremy called again but I didn’t answer—again. I don’t know what else to say to him. The bottom line is that even though it hurts like hell, no matter how much we want to be more than friends, we can’t. And the sooner we both realize it, the better off we’ll both be.

  My mom left her spirit notebook out for me to look at. I thought she’d never let me see it again after I gave it back to her a couple of weeks ago. I got one tiny chocolate stain on the back cover and she freaked out. For someone who doesn’t care much about her lessons from Mama, she sure is protective of that book.

  My mom has notes of a tea that she used on an ex-boyfriend that kept his other broads away from him. I think I should look this up tomorrow when I get back to Mama’s. But the notes my mom has here are pretty good too. As much drama as Rah’s had lately, I’m sure he’ll want to take a sip of this tea. I’ll make it for him tomorrow when he takes me home. Until then, I’m going to chill and enjoy my time alone, a treat I very rarely get.

  Rah felt really bad about me having to deal with Trish and Sandy the night before and decided to give me a ride to Mama’s today and I’m glad. I studied the concoction in my mom’s journal and it doesn’t seem hard to make. It says that when they come too close to his scent they’ll be repelled. Sounds good to me. Now I just have to get him to be in agreement with me and we’re good to go.

  “Jayd, are you sure your grandmother doesn’t mind us being back here?” Rah says as we walk into the spirit room behind a possessive Lexi, who’s sniffing him down. Recognizing his smell, she retreats to the corner for a late afternoon nap so we can get to work. Hopefully we’ll be in and out before Mama gets home.

  “You know Mama has a soft spot for you,” I say, directing him to put my bags under the table and sit down on one of the wooden stools. “Besides, she’s not back here so it’s all good.” I just want to make Rah his tea and get out of here before she finds out what I’m up to. Even if Rah has given me permission to help him, I don’t think Mama wants me helping anyone else until I get myself together first. But part of my getting together is getting Rah together, though somehow I don’t think Mama would see it my way.

  “So what are you making me? Is it going to taste good?” he asks, watching me look through the large book on the table. I turn to the back to a section entitled “Tinctures and Teas.” I thumb through the pages and find a recipe similar to the one in my mom’s notebook. I copied down her notes into mine to compare the ingredients on each list.

  “Yes, I think it is. And it’s a tea to help you not smell irresistible to anyone but me.” I take the antique teapot off the tiny stove and fill it up in the sink. The recipe is pretty basic except for one special herb I’ve never used before. “Can you look in the cabinet and hand me a coffee mug?”

  “Sure thing, Queen Jayd,” he says, smiling at me as he reaches into the cabinet behind his head. The door almost hits him in the face when he opens it due to the tight space. Whenever someone other than Mama and myself are in here, the room feels smaller than usual.

  “Thank you.” I take the mug from Rah and place the tiny round tea infuser inside. According to the directions, I’m supposed to stuff the ingredients into the infuser and pour the boiling water over it. If I want to be resistant to the effects I have to take a sip too. For both our sakes, I hope it tastes better than it sounds. “Now for the fun part
.”

  “I don’t like the way you said that,” he says, watching me closely. “You’re not still mad at me are you?”

  “That’s a good question to ask someone who’s about to feed you. But no, I’m not mad at the fact that you can’t handle your business like a man.” Rah looks sad as my words hit the air and I realize I’ve hurt his feelings. “You’re in my prayers.” I reach across the table to squeeze his cheeks, but he only looks slightly amused.

  “Yeah, I just hope they’re good prayers.” I know he’s only joking but it stings a little for him to think that I would wish harm on anyone, especially him. Ever since my trying to help Misty blew up in my face, everyone’s been acting a little distant in their own way, including Rah. I know they can’t help it. My friends need time to adjust to learning about my heritage, but Rah has always known what’s up with me.

  “What do you mean by that?” I ask, gathering teaspoons of ingredients from the various glass canisters lining the shelves. Everything’s in alphabetical order, making it easy to locate the tools I need for the “Bitter Bwoy Brew” I’m making.

  “Nothing, girl. Don’t go getting all sensitive on me now. You know I’m just joking, right?” The teapot whistles loudly and I turn it off. Mama’s yellow sunflower oven mitt fits my hand perfectly, allowing me to pick up the hot pot and pour the boiling water over the concoction. The steam overwhelms my face, almost burning me, but it still feels good. I hope the brew is as potent as it smells. After waiting for the drink to cool, it’s finally ready.

  “Here, have some tea.” I take a sip with my teaspoon before passing the bitter elixir to Rah. He takes the warm mug and hesitates slightly before drinking it down in three swift gulps. Now that’s true faith in me. I know he trusts me but sometimes I wonder how much.

  “Good boy. Now you’ll be all better,” I say, patting Rah’s hand like Mama does me. He scrunches up his face like he’s in some serious pain. I guess the bitter herbs are finally reaching his taste buds. From the looks of it, the aftertaste must be worse than actually drinking the strong tea.

  “What the hell was in that shit? That was awful,” he says, grabbing a paper towel from the roll on the table and wiping his mouth. If he were at home he’d probably try and scrub his tongue with it. He glares at me as I laugh at his reaction while cleaning up my mess. The sun is beginning to set and we both need to get ready for our school week. I’m glad we only have three days of school with Thanksgiving—or misgiving holiday as Mama calls it—this Thursday. It makes the time more palatable.

  “It has to be bitter to work. It did smell kind of raunchy though.” I squeeze more Palmolive onto the yellow sponge as I continue my cleaning. “I’ll make you something sweet to make up for it next weekend, promise.” Rah rises from the kitchen table and puts the towel down on the counter beside the sink. He steps behind me as I wash the dishes, putting his arms around my waist. He could never smell bad to me; I don’t care what kind of potion he takes. I hope the same isn’t true for Trish and Sandy.

  “You’re all the sweet I need,” he says, kissing the side of my neck and sending shivers down my belly. Rah gets a rise out of me like no other dude ever has. Jeremy’s the closest but even he had his limitations. I could stay wrapped up in Rah’s arms indefinitely. “Thank you for helping me, Jayd, for real.”

  “You’re welcome.” I pick up another towel hanging from the rack above the sink and dry my hands. “Okay, that’s enough touching. I’ve got to get inside and you need to get going. The rats come out at night, remember.” I turn around to face Rah, still enclosed in his tight grip. He kisses me soft and slow at first, tasting every bit of the tea remnants lingering on my lips. I give into the moment, wrapping my arms around his neck and allowing him to pull me in closer to him. I know I’m going to suffer more hurt with Rah but I can’t help my strong feelings for him. I just hope I’ll be able to always keep us safe from the haters.

  After Rah leaves, I join Mama in the kitchen and catch up with her about our weekends. She apparently got home a few minutes ago and had a taste for something sweet. And I’m glad she did because she’s making my favorite dessert.

  “Honey cakes have been in our family for generations, Jayd. Even your mother can make these well,” she says as she mixes the golden batter counterclockwise in the large glass bowl.

  “Yeah, when she has to,” I say, adding vanilla to the mix. The smell hits my nose, instantly making me hungry for a taste. I swirl my index finger in the batter and take a scoop to sample.

  “Jayd, what have I told you about putting your finger in my food, girl?” Mama says, tapping me on the hand with the wooden spoon and unintentionally rewarding me with more to taste.

  “Mmm, thank you.” I lick the rest of the batter off my fingers before washing them in the sink. “These cakes are going to be good.”

  “Yes, they are. So how was your weekend?” she asks as she drops spoonfuls of her sweet creation onto the cookie sheet covered in parchment paper. They’re the size of cookies and as soft as cakes after they bake.

  “It was cool. I made some money and that’s always good,” I say, sitting down across from her at the kitchen table. Mama’s still dressed and looks ready to peel off her long day.

  “Legally, I hope?” I know Mama’s joking but she does worry about us getting caught up in the streets. The last thing I would ever do is something that’ll get me put in jail or killed. If I did, the punishment I’d suffer from Mama would be worse than death.

  “Yes, Mama. I had three hair clients and made as much in a few hours as I would have working all weekend at the restaurant.” Mama watches me tell her my news and her eyes shimmer with interest. Is she happy that I found my new hustle or listening for something else I’m not consciously saying? “Which reminds me, has Netta said anything about me working with her?”

  “I’m not so sure about that,” she says, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms over her chest. Big breasts run in our lineage, just like our other gifts. “You know it’s not an ordinary hair shop, Jayd. You can’t bring trouble to our haven.” Contrary to popular belief, I don’t like drama even if it does seem to follow me wherever I go.

  “I understand that, Mama, and that’s why I want to work there.” I’m going to plead my case until she reconsiders. “I’ve been thinking about this for a while now and I think it would be really good for my spirit studies too. Besides, this way you could keep an even closer eye on me.” Mama leans her head to one side, looking at me in disbelief.

  “Jayd, you’re good but you’re not that good,” Mama says, rising from her seat to check on the cakes. “Oh shit, didn’t you smell them burning?” she says, taking the hot sheet out of the oven. Mama’s been complaining about that stove for over a year now and Daddy still hasn’t taken care of it. Mama’s determined to buy a new one with her own money, which will take a while to save up. She charges almost nothing for her services and volunteers whenever she works outside of the house. If I could get her a new stove I would.

  “I’m sorry, Mama.” I don’t know why I’m apologizing. She was as close to the stove as I was and her nose works way better than mine. I guess she’s feeling a bit off today. Ever since my uncles had it out again and Esmeralda’s been on my case, Mama hasn’t looked well.

  “Don’t talk back to your grandmother, not even in your own head,” my mother intrudes. “She may not be able to read your mind like I can but she knows what you’re thinking, Jayd. Trust me on this one.” Mama looks up from her overbrowned treats and smiles at me.

  “Listen to your mother, Jayd. Remember she’s already been down this path with me before. And tell her she needs to get over here for a reading or else I’m coming to her house.” I know my mom doesn’t want that. The last time Mama went over to her house she did a cleansing and smudged the entire building with sage, drawing more attention from the neighbors than my mother wants.

  “Ah hell nah, she can’t come over here. Tell her I’ll see her after the holiday. I’m out. S
ee you Wednesday, baby.” I’m glad I get to go to my mom’s house for holidays. The more time I can spend away from the men in this house, the better.

  “She says after Thanksgiving,” I say standing behind Mama, ready to sample the sweets. Personally, I like my cookies a little burnt. “What did my mom mean that you can tell what I’m thinking?” I wait for her to pass me a cookie.

  “Oh Jayd, why do you ask questions you already know the answer to? Besides, I can’t tell you everything. Some things you need to learn about on your own.” Now Mama looks deeply contemplative. After a few moments of silence and Mama picking at the delicate treats, I decide to ask for one. But before I can, she instinctively passes me one and piles the rest in a stack on the warm sheet.

  “No matter how they may look, these are the bomb, Mama.” I devour the tasty treat in two bites. They’re so soft and moist they could melt in my mouth.

  “Slow down, Jayd. That’s always been one of your major problems, girl. You move too damn fast.” I look into Mama’s eyes and can tell she’s talking about way more than me and my fetish for honey cakes. “I saw Rah’s car out front when I got home. How come he didn’t come in to say hello?”

  “He had to pick up Kamal from his grandmother’s house and he was already running late.” I was hoping Mama wouldn’t pick up on that but who am I kidding? Mama picks up on everything.

  “Do you know why I burnt these cakes, Jayd?” she says as she picks through the pile of cookies and tosses out the burnt ones. There are only three dozen and she’s already thrown away seven of them. Part of me wants to take them out of the trash but I know Mama would trip on me for something like that.

  “I know, Mama. It was my fault. I should’ve smelt them burning,” I say, watching her toss more into the bin. Maybe I can get them out when she goes to her room.