by Anna Antonia
Now that I’d given myself permission to feel, emotions rose up in me at will. My eyes watered. We had both tried the best we could with what we knew how. There was nothing to regret.
Many minutes passed before Elaine could speak. “Please forgive me, Damian. I never wanted you to find out about what I had done to your blessed mother. I lived with the shame for so long.”
I rubbed her back and then patted it. “There's nothing for me to forgive. I now understand how much you loved my father. I know you would've never done anything to truly hurt either of them. Especially if you knew what would happen to her. It was a misfortune but not your fault. I promise you I do not hold anything against you.”
I meant it with all of my heart. Elaine had carried this misery for far too long. It was past time to let it go. She deserved to be free too.
Elaine put her head back on my chest and continue to cry softly for many minutes. I was content to hold her, to finally show her the warmth a mother deserved and needed.
My heart ached with the love I felt for all of these people who had done so much to sacrifice for me and my future happiness. I could never repay them in this lifetime, but what I could do was make sure their sacrifices were not in vain.
I would love Risa for the rest of my life and I would live the life my father and mother and Elaine and even Thomas never could.
It was more than enough for the man I wanted to be.
68
RISA
Waiting for Damian to come back, I kept circling about my secret news.
There was already so much for Damian to process tonight. But the more I thought about it, the more I wanted him to know. I already loved my baby so much, even though I’d worried incessantly since I found out about her.
I had complete faith Damian would love her just as much. Was tonight the right time though?
Damian decided for me when he swept in. Though his eyes were red, his handsome face was free from strain. I didn’t think I ever saw him so peaceful.
“Risa, I have something to tell you.”
Sitting up higher in bed, I held out a hand towards him. He grasped it tightly. “What is, Damian?”
He sat down in the bedside chair and kissed my hand. “I don’t want to waste any more time, Risa. I love you so much and I want to do everything with you. I want to visit every continent, go to every city you’d ever want to visit, and just live our lives. Quiet. Peaceful. No more running away, no more kidnappings, no more lying by omission.”
My grin faded. Of course, Damian noticed it immediately.
“What’s wrong, my love?”
I blew out a steadying breath, looking for the best way to share my news and the worries I had.
“Damian, I have something very important to tell you. I wasn’t going to until I knew more, but…”
“But what?” The worry came back to his expression and I wanted to kick myself for causing it.
So I just said it.
“I’m pregnant.”
He blinked, his beautiful eyes going soft and then focusing into pinpoint awareness.
“When do you find out?”
I looked away only for Damian to gently lift my chin up. Licking my lips, I answered, “Not even a day ago.”
He sat quietly and then stated, “You knew you were carrying my child and you involved yourself in a firefight.”
“Yes.”
“You were shot twice and only by the grace of God you’re still here.”
“Yes.”
“I could’ve lost both of you.”
Oh no.
“Damian, I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad. It’s just…this was the only way. They’d never leave you alone if we hadn’t drawn them out tonight.”
He placed a finger on my lips. “No. Don’t say anything else.” Damian then looked down at our entwined fingers. “Promise me something.”
“Anything.”
“Don’t ever put yourself in danger like that again. I meant what I said tonight. I don’t want to have to live without you, Risa. You are my life.” He put his palm on my belly. “Both of you are my world. Promise me, Risa. Promise me now.”
My view of Damian sloshed about. “I promise. Are you mad at me?”
“No.” He carefully brushed a lock of hair behind my ear. “We’re going to have a child together, Risa. How could I ever be mad after hearing such wonderful news? We’re going to be parents!”
I laughed, especially when he hugged me hard before immediately releasing me with a worried “Did I hurt you?”
“No, I promise. I’m sturdy, remember?”
“I’m going to have to forget that until you’re safely delivered and have had a clear checkup.”
Blushing a bit under his smoky stare, I cleared my throat, not relishing the next bit.
“Damian, I…I don’t know how to say this, but I drank some while in Denver. I had no idea I was pregnant. Not a clue. Looking back, I should’ve known but I didn’t. I’m sorry. I had an amniocentesis done, but I…we won’t have the results back for another week or two.”
He stilled. “Did the doctor give you cause to worry?”
“No. He assured me all my bloodwork and vitals looked good. The ultrasound too. I just needed to make sure. I don’t have a high tolerance level so I never drank more than a glass or two, but…” My lip wobbled.
Damian immediately wrapped me in his strong arms. “It’s not your fault because you didn’t know. However, our child turns out, he or she will be perfect because she’s ours. I will love our son or daughter no matter what. Believe me, Risa. I love you both so much already. You’ve given me more than I ever deserved and I will worship you for the rest of my life.”
Pressed against Damian’s chest, I let out tears of relief. I didn’t know how badly I needed to hear those words until he gave them to me.
“I love you so much, Damian. Forever and always.”
He placed a finger beneath my chin and tipped it up. His beautiful eyes were as serene.
“Once I tried to lock you in a cage of my choosing, Risa, because even then I knew I did not want to live a life without you. I want to give you all the words, Risa, you’d ever want. I promise I will do better in sharing my thoughts with you. I will become a chatterbox if need be.”
I laughed, covering my mouth with both hands while shaking my head. “I don’t want you to change, Damian. I love you as you are. Your still waters run deep and I want to swim in them.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“I am saying I want forever with you.”
My heartbeat picked up its cadence. We had circled back to the beginning.
“Forever?”
“Forever.” Damian lifted both my hands to his mouth and kissed them reverently. “I do not have a ring.”
“We can pick one out together later.”
“We are not in front of the Eiffel Tower.”
“If we went to France, I’d rather be at your estate.”
“I don’t have a speech prepared.”
“Words are overrated.”
He smiled, soft and so full of love my heart wanted to burst.
“You are my forever, Risa Kelly. There has not, nor will there ever be another woman above you. I love you with all of my heart. It belongs to you more than it ever belonged to me. After all the trouble I’ve brought you, all the tears you’ve cried, all the love you’ve given, do you think you can find it in your heart to keep mine?”
What else would I ever want to say except for this?
“Yes, Damian. Always.”
Happily ever after belonged to these two lovers who’d overcome so much…
69
DAMIAN
My life was complete. Risa and I married five months before. Her father wasn’t quite on board with our whirlwind courtship, much less the fact I’d impregnated his daughter before marriage.
Risa’s mother was far more forgiving.
We got married in her family’s church. Elaine and Thomas w
ere in attendance as was Leon and Gretchen. Marriage was on the horizon for those two within the year.
I’d never been happier than when I saw Risa coming down the aisle in her frothy white dress. Then I realized I was never happier than when the priest announced us as “Mr. and Mrs. Damian Konstantinov Black-Price.”
And now I knew I this was the happiest moment of my life.
Risa was about to give birth and my world was about to expand by a million.
The man who never believed he could let go of control and be satisfied was now about to have zero control. I could only wait while Risa heralded the next generation of our family.
I simply couldn’t wait.
70
RISA
Our daughter was about to be born and I couldn’t wait to meet her.
Damian was all I could ever ask for in the delivery room. He encouraged me, telling me how strong I was, how incredibly lucky we were to be welcoming our baby into the world. Every time I thought I couldn’t stand the pain one second more, he was there to wipe my brow, to feed me ice chips, hold my hand, or just tell me how much he loved me.
Eventually that wasn't enough.
I needed Damian to hold me, to provide stability in a world full of pain. While I could not lay over his lap, I was able to lean against him as he sat behind me. I dug my fingers into his thighs, hard. I held onto him much like I would when he disciplined me all those delicious times before.
In some ways, it was much the same.
Damian spanking me was a wonderful way to get all my feelings out. This pain, this constant unending pain, that felt like it was going to rip me apart from the inside out, was also going to let forth something into the world.
Just when I didn't think I could take another second, the doctor announced that he could see the crown. I had suffered in agony for hours but it all fell away as the excitement hit my veins.
“She’s almost here! Did you hear that, Damian? She’s almost here!”
“I know, my love. Just hold on a little bit longer.”
Damian took hold of my hands, our fingers threading tightly together. I leveraged against him, pushing with all my might.
And then it happened.
I felt the pain and then the quickening as my child left my body. She was here.
“Congratulations! It’s a girl!”
The doctor announced what I already knew, had known from the very first ultrasound. Damian and I had daughter. A beautiful, squalling, red-faced little angel.
I wept and laughed at the same time. Damian proudly cut the cord. His eyes shone unashamedly with tears when they took her away. The doctors and nurses quickly cleaned up our little girl, wrapping her up securely in a blanket before putting a little knit cap on her tiny head.
And then she was in my arms. I couldn't look away from our little miracle. She has survived so much already. She was perfect. She was ours.
I couldn’t hardly wait to show her off to my parents and Damian’s, all keeping vigil in the waiting room just right outside the door. And I would. Later.
Now was for us.
Me, Damian, and Marisol.
Damian’s arms closed around mine, allowing him to hold our baby at the same time.
“Risa, you humble me.”
It was only four words but the words were perfect. They told me not only did Damian have my heart and I his, but this little scrap of a person now held onto both of ours tightly.
“Thank you for Marisol.” He kissed the side of my sweaty temple. “I love you.”
Sitting there in the delivery room, hair messy, sweaty, and tangled, without a drop of makeup, my lips chapped, and my hospital gown hanging off one shoulder, I never felt more beautiful in my life.
The expression in Damian’s eyes, the love I felt in his arms, the expression of that love laying in my arms, all of that was what I’d been searching for my whole life and never even knew it until I met this wonderful, beautiful, imperfect man.
I thought of all the people who would come after us. All of them would scatter across the earth like the stars across the sky, too many to count. All of them would be because we fell in love.
We were forever. The sun and the moon. Heaven and hell. The stars in the sky.
Damian and Risa. Always and forever.
MORE ANNA ANTONIA
Mad, Bad, & Dangerous to Love Series
Mad for You
First Night (A Mad for You Short)
First Lines (A Mad for You Short)
Bad for You
Dangerous for You
All to Love You
My Love Series
My Love Forgive
My Love Break
My Love Regret
My Love Protect
My Love Forever
Billionaire Grooms, Unexpected Brides
As I Hide: Adrian #1
As I Hide: Adrian #2
As I Hide: Adrian #3
Adrian (Complete Novel)
Marcus’s Mercy (A Dark Romance)
Marcus’s Mercy #1
Marcus’s Mercy #2
Marcus’s Mercy #3
Marcus’s Mercy (Complete Novel)
Collection
Under His Hand
Loved by the Billionaire
ABOUT ANNA ANTONIA
Anna is a lover of all things dark and passionate. Living in the Southeastern United States, she enjoys antiquing, DIY thrift store finds, sedate hiking along trails, and spending time with her family and menagerie of pets. Being the only girl in a household full of men makes it hard to always be a lady, but she gives it a good old college try.
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