Rocker Boy

by Wendy Knight

  "I feel invincible. Like I could do anything. I'm going to run for president. No! I'm going to be Batman!" Harli giggled and bounced in a circle.

  They made it through the meet and greets and backstage passes. He signed skin he didn't want to, he took pictures and was groped by women he didn't know. Guys drooled over Harli, and he had to keep his fists hidden behind his back half the time.

  But it was worth it, to see her so alive. So happy. Like she'd shaken the darkness that had been hiding her for so long. She was out in the light now.

  And free.

  After parties with JoAnn Lee were nothing like after parties with Shattered Assassin. It ended at two, and then the country queen went to bed.

  Minutes later, Levi heard a knock on his door. Harli stood in the hall, still bouncing, eyes still shining. "I can't sleep."

  He smiled. "I figured." Opening the door wider, he ushered her inside.

  "Are you tired? Do you need to go to bed? You have a concert tonight. Another concert. Holy crap, I can't even imagine doing that again." She was talking about eight hundred miles an hour and so damn adorable it was killing him.

  "You were born to be on that stage, Harli," he said, handing her a bottled water. "I've never seen you so at home."

  Her eyes closed dreamily. "It was amazing." She sank onto the couch and her eyes popped open again. "You didn't answer me. Do you need to go to bed? I can… read. Or something."

  By the way she couldn't sit still, he'd guess that reading probably wasn't the best option, no matter how much she loved books. Levi grabbed his own water and settled down next to her. "I'm not tired." I don't want to waste the last few hours I have with you.

  Who knows when you'll run again.

  She was quiet, daydreaming, by the looks of it. He watched her face, trying to read her thoughts and memorize her features. "You are so beautiful," he said without meaning to.

  Her eyes shot open and she stared at him. He waited. Waited for her excuse to run. Waited for her to shut him down. Braced himself for it as best he could, cursing his own stupidity.

  "Thank you," she said with a small smile. "You are too."

  Desperate to diffuse the tension he'd just dragged in, he said, "Guys are not beautiful, Harli. They're handsome. Or sexy. I think the word you're looking for is—"

  "Hotter than hell?" A wicked little smile played around her mouth.

  "Well, yeah. That works."

  Her smile practically lit up the room.

  She's not running.

  Okay. He'd dodged one catastrophe. What else could he do to keep her here?

  "Tell me about your song."

  "Ah." She nodded, gnawing on her lip as she leaned back against the arm of the couch, her bare feet burrowed under the back of his knee. "It's gorgeous, Levi. At least, in my head it is. But I can't get it out. It's driving me crazy!"

  Yeah. Jace told me.

  But he didn't say that. One of his wiser moves of the night, really. "Can you play it for me? What you have?"

  Most people, if he asked them to play a song they'd only partially written, would laugh at him. But this was Harli Lee. She could play anything.

  "Yeah. I mean, I can play what I have. You sure you don't mind helping me?"

  Mind? You're the reason I breathe, Sunshine.

  "Nope. Show me this masterpiece, Harli." He pushed himself off the couch and went in search of his guitar. No one touched his guitar but him.

  And her, because she'd taught him to play it.

  He handed it over, and Harli took it reverently, the way she held all instruments. Like they were beloved pets and not lifeless plastic and wood and strings. Settling against the couch, she strummed a couple of chords and nodded to herself. "Ready?" she asked, but he wasn't sure whether she was talking to him, or to herself.

  Her fingers slowly slid over the strings, picking out the melody. Her foot tapped against the floor, and she hummed softly. It was haunting, the music she brought to life. It filled his soul with a beautiful pain, pulling him through a story with no words, only stark emotion.

  And then it ended. He shook himself out of his reverie, blinking, unsure when he'd even closed his eyes. "Holy shit, Harli."

  She grinned, but it died into a frustrated grimace. "That's where I'm stuck. I can see the next few notes, but there's… there's like a wall between me and them."

  He nodded, replaying the song over through his head. He could feel her eyes on him, memorizing him like he had her just a few minutes ago, and he wanted to ask her if that music was for him. If she'd felt him when she'd written it.

  "It's… it's us," she said quietly, dropping her gaze to her hands when he looked at her.

  Picking his words very carefully, he said, "Then this is where it starts to pick up."

  "Really?" she asked, barely a whisper.

  "I sure as hell hope so, Sunshine."

  She opened her mouth to say something, but suddenly sat up, shaking her head. "Oh!"

  She whirled the guitar back into place, completely immersed, and he watched her create her magic. Her fingers flew over the guitar, first trying one note, and then another and another, until she started growling. "I hear it. I just can't—"

  He reached over and took the guitar. "How about this one?" He couldn't automatically play everything he heard like she could. But he knew well enough how to create sound. He played the note stuck in his head, thrilled beyond belief when her entire face lit up.

  "That's it!" she shrieked. He laughed as she pulled the guitar back and played through the last bit again. Only this time, she kept going, the song picking up, swirling out of the desperate melody into a lighter, happier, more beautiful harmony.

  He spent the next hour watching her scribble it down onto the hotel notebook, staying out of the way because when she got like this, there was no interrupting her. It was a work of genius, he knew, and one day she would be known as one of the greatest composers in their time. Maybe in all time.

  And he got to watch her work.

  Finally, she set the notebook down, beaming at it like it was a newborn baby. "Done. Wow. Sorry." She blinked at him, coming out of her music-induced trance. "I didn't mean to—"

  He shook his head. "Don't apologize," he said softly.

  She blushed, ducking her head.

  "Can I ask you something?" he asked. Her shoulders tensed and she nodded cautiously. "Your song. It's about us?"

  Again, the cautious nod.

  "So the end… it was happier, right? What does that mean, Harli?" He was positive he would never get tired of the way her name rolled off his tongue.

  "It means that eventually, we'll find peace. In whatever form that may be."

  And he had no idea how to respond to that.

  His phone started singing — the good morning song from Babes in Arms. "Shit."

  "Time to get up?" she asked, smirking. Trying to raise one eyebrow, but failing. Failing adorably.

  "My plane leaves in an hour. I have to get ready to go."

  Her face fell, the light dying from her smile. "Oh. I forgot you had to go so early."

  He sighed, running a hand through his hair as he stood up. "I need to pack."

  Please don't leave yet. Please don't leave yet.

  "Do you want help?" she asked, eyes wide and vulnerable. Like she somehow thought he would ever turn down that offer.

  "Yes, please." He pulled her to her feet as his phone buzzed. Keeping one hand holding hers, he grabbed at the annoying sound with his other. "Yeah?"

  "Your car is here, Mr. Vasi."

  He pursed his lips. "I'll be right down."

  Her eyes opened wider.

  He hung up and stole her other hand — the one he'd relinquished. "I have another question."

  She was breathing quickly, her cheeks stained pink as she watched him. "Okay."

  "Is it possible… at all possible," he asked softly, tugging her closer to him. He'd waited all day for a chance like this, and if he was leaving, he was taking that chan
ce now. "—that your song is happy at the end because we're together again?"

  There. He'd said it. He'd thrown his heart right into the fire and prayed that she didn't watch it burn.

  Her eyes dipped to his mouth and she bit her lip. "Yes, Levi. It's possible."

  Pulling her against him, he dipped his head, taking her lips with his. He wanted to be slow and gentle, but the second he touched her, he lost all control. He thrust his tongue into her mouth and she met him, sucking gently, so gently, and it drove him absolutely crazy. She rose up on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck, molding herself against him so he could feel every soft, perfect curve.

  "Holy hell, Sunshine," he groaned against her mouth, laying her back against the couch, shifting so she was pinned beneath him.

  She left his mouth and kissed along his jawline to his ear, nibbling with her teeth, her hands sliding up the back of his t-shirt so her fingers could dig into the skin. He claimed her mouth again, biting her bottom lip as she moaned.

  Harli tugged his shirt over his head, and he relinquished her mouth only long enough to free himself from the collar. She threw it away and her fingers danced up his back and then back down, to the waistband of his jeans.

  The phone buzzed again.

  "Son of a bitch!" he yelled, tumbling off her to the floor. She sat up, eyes wide, lips swollen, cheeks flushed. Her dark waves were a tangled mess and her hand shook as she reached over to answer the phone. "Hello?" she said breathlessly. She listened silently, her eyes roving restlessly over his chest and shoulders. "I'll tell him. Thank you."

  As soon as she hung up, he grabbed her again, pulling her to the edge of the couch while he knelt in front of it. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he ran his tongue along her collarbone. "Levi," she whimpered. He sucked the tender skin in through his teeth, knowing he was going to leave a mark and not caring. Not even a little. "Levi, your car's here. You're gonna miss your plane," she panted, tipping her head back.

  His hands tangled in her silky curls as he moved down her shoulder. "I don't care."

  Someone knocked on the door. Harli's eyes flew open, meeting his gaze as he swore, and then swore again. Rising to his feet, he grabbed her hands, pulling her with him to the door, kissing her as he walked backward, her hands around his neck. "Who is it?" he growled.

  "Elizabeth."

  Harli raised her eyebrows. "Who's Elizabeth?" she whispered.

  "Damned if I know," he answered her, and then to the door, "Who the hell are you?"

  "JoAnn's assistant. She says to tell you it's time to go or you'll miss your plane, and Harli, it's time for bed."

  Harli started to giggle. Reaching around Levi, she swung the door open. Elizabeth didn't even blink at the sight of them tangled together, and Levi shirtless. "I'll be right out."

  Elizabeth didn't move, just folded her arms and waited.

  Levi sighed. "I feel like a sixteen year old kid," he muttered, finally releasing Harli. She laughed, and he realized she liked having someone tell her it was time for bed. She liked the fact that someone cared. He supposed if it made her happy, it made him happy.

  Even if it interrupted something he'd been dreaming about non-stop for the past several months.

  She threw his shirt at him, pursing her lips, eyes sparkling. Then she helped him pack, hoisting his guitar case into her arms. "Ready?"

  "There are bell hops for that, sweetheart," he drawled.

  She rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Well, I want to walk you down, so I might as well make myself useful."

  "But—but what if you get attacked on your way back? What if someone—"

  "Levi." She put a finger to his lips, effectively shushing him. "I live alone. I think I can handle a trip up in the elevator by myself.

  Chapter Twenty-two

  HARLI MADE SURE HIS GUITAR WAS safely in the car before she turned to face him. "I don't know how to say goodbye," she said quietly.

  He took her hand and tugged her into him again, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her temple. Her heart hadn't quite stopped racing from their little interlude in his room, and her hands were definitely still shaking.

  "I don't want to say goodbye," he mumbled against her hair. "When you go home, Harli, you—you're not gonna block me out again, are you? Because so help me, Sunshine, I will fly back home and—"

  She smiled, shushing him again. "I will unblock you from every aspect of my life."

  "Does that mean I get to be the friend you like to kiss again then?" He gave her his most adorable smile, the one she could never say no to.

  So she didn't. "Yes, Levi. You can be my friend that I like to kiss."

  "Mr. Vasi." Elizabeth looked pointedly toward the waiting car, and if they hadn't been so rushed, Harli would tell her how important this time with Levi was. She would tell her that he was a rock star, and Harli was just a dumb little girl, and that when he left her, she might never get him back — and that this was what she had to worry about every single time. One day, Levi would wake up and realize that she was nothing, and it would kill her. So these moments, when he loved her, when he remembered her — every single one counted.

  Levi kissed Harli again, but slowly and gently, and it reached clear down to her broken heart.

  "I love you, Harli. You know that, right? I've always loved you."

  She smiled, running her fingers across the tattoo of the sun just peeking out of his collar. It covered his heart. "I love you, too, Levi."

  Reluctantly, so slowly, he got in the car and she shut the door after him, raising one hand as it pulled away. "Elizabeth?" she asked quietly.

  "Yes, Ms. Lee?"

  "Please don't tell anyone you saw me cry."

  SHE STAYED ANOTHER THREE days with her grandmother. They went shopping and had tea. She rode in her grandmother's tour bus to New Orleans, and they spent the entire day Monday exploring the old city. Harli was especially fond of the cemeteries. The city had a different feel than anything like Utah, or Vegas, or Arizona—the only three places she'd been before this trip. It was almost a darkness, a mystery. Like everything was haunted, just a little.

  "I bet you feel right at home here, huh, Angela?"

  "Very funny."

  But her grandmother was talking, so her internal conversation with her ghost would have to wait. "Anything fun coming up in school?"

  Harli shrugged, trying to get the camera on her phone to focus on the face of an angel statue who seemed to be crying real tears. "We have a dance this Saturday."

  "Are you going?" JoAnn asked, watching with amusement as Harli failed, again, to get the picture to turn out. JoAnn had a cell phone. It even took pictures. But she didn't know how to work it.

  "I've been asked. I don't know. I haven't really given it a lot of thought." Except to think that Levi promised to come home for Prom. And he seems to have forgotten.

  "Well. You should go. Last dance of your school career, right?"

  "Hopefully," Harli muttered, giving up on the picture. "It would be more fun if my friends were going, but they're secretly in love with each other and won't admit it, so neither of them are going."

  "You should tell them to knock it off."

  Harli grinned. "Yeah. Jace doesn't listen to me much. Maybe Levi could talk some sense into him. They seem to be good friends again."

  Levi, whom she hadn't heard from since he'd left.

  Not one word.

  But he was tired, right? And he'd had a concert. Surely, he'd just not had time to call. He hadn't forgotten her. Not already. Not after what happened last time. Not after what he'd said.

  As if reading her mind, JoAnn spoke up. "So, Levi tells me that you want to audition for Julliard." They wandered up and down the silent rows, Harli tracing names and dates with her fingertip.

  But now she paused. "He told you that?"

  JoAnn nodded. "He did. He also told me you won't do it."

  Harli looked away, gnawing on the inside of her cheek and trying her hardest not to blush. "It'
s just a stupid dream." She shrugged, which would have been way more convincing if her voice hadn't cracked.

  "Why won't you try?" JoAnn asked, and her voice didn't crack. Her eyes seemed to see right through to Harli's very soul. Harli wandered away, pausing to take a picture of a beautiful mausoleum.

  "It's just…" Harli shook her head. "It was Selicia's dream. If I go, it will just be a slap in the face, you know? She already hates me—" Realizing what she'd said, Harli snapped her mouth shut, eyes wide and grateful she had her back to JoAnn.

  "She what?" JoAnn asked flatly.

  "She hates me playing music." Yes. That was safe. Much safer than saying she hates me enough.

  "She what?" JoAnn asked, this time in bewilderment.

  Harli turned to face her, praying that JoAnn wouldn't hate her, too, for ruining Selicia's gift. "She wanted to go to Julliard. But she didn't get to audition. Because—because of me."

  JoAnn's eyebrows both shot up, and then she scowled. "That's bull."

  "Wha—what?" This was the closest Harli'd ever heard JoAnn ever come to swearing.

  "Selicia did audition for Julliard. Twice. She was denied both times. And you had nothing to do with it. She wouldn't put in the time or effort it took to prepare. She thought she was a natural talent — which she was — but natural talent still needs practice."

  Harli felt the world tip beneath her, just a bit. She had to grab onto the nearest headstone to keep from falling right off her feet. "She auditioned? And was denied?"

  "Yes. Before you were born. You had nothing to do with it."

  Harli abruptly sat down on the cobblestone path, putting a cool hand to her temple. She couldn't even count how many times Selicia had told her she'd messed up her audition because she was pregnant with Harli. And now…

  She was lying. All this time.

  "Harli?" JoAnn asked, and Harli realized it was the third or fourth time she'd said it.

  "Sorry. I'm okay. I just—I think maybe I need to eat?" She struggled to her feet, even though the world still felt sideways. "Are you hungry?"

  JoAnn ignored her question. "Are you okay?"

  Harli nodded. "Yeah. Yeah."