Accepted & Rebuilt (Shattered Duet Book 2)

by Bry Ann

  Cut notices immediately.

  I’m on my fiftieth rep, coming down from the exercise, when a granola bar is all but shoved in my face.

  “Eat. I don’t want you passing out.”

  “Um, okay. Sorry, I just… my dad,” I whisper. “I haven’t been hungry.”

  He nods at that. “I get it, but I won’t train you if it’s going to hurt you.”

  I open the bar and silently eat half of it. I pause for a moment. “This bar is dense,” I tell him. “It’s all nuts and seeds.”

  “Okay, save the other half for after.”

  Feeling relieved, since I’ve never been good at training on a full stomach, I set the other half of the bar on the counter.

  “You mentioned last time we trained that you wanted to train your mind more than your body.”

  “Yes?” I say tentatively, eyebrows tightening. I want that more than anything. All the trouble I’ve gotten in in my life has been from lack of intuition and mental toughness.

  “That’s what we’re gonna work on today.”

  “How it that possible?”

  He smirks a little. “It’s possible.”

  “O… kay.”

  “Can you trust me a bit for this session?”

  Cut watches my body language more than listening to the words coming out of my mouth.

  Smart man.

  “Yes.” I trust him as much as I can.

  “Good. Let’s get started.”

  From there, we do. He trains me to be mentally tougher through planks that make me want to quit far before my body is ready to. He helps transform my freeze response to fight or flight by coming behind me for fake attacks and showing me ways to fight and get away. We run through various exercises, over and over again. Learning by repetition and hard work.

  I’m dead by the time we’re done.

  Collapsed on the floor, breathing heavily.

  As insistent as I once was that I only have a couple sessions in self-defense, I’m now kind of sad this is over. Will I ever see Cut again?

  It doesn’t matter.

  As much as I only wanted a couple sessions, Cut was the one who truly insisted on it. He wouldn’t train me more than twice.

  And this is two.

  I roll up onto my side, push to a seated position, and let my arms dangle off my knees.

  “Thank you for everything. Really. I didn’t think I’d like this at all. Nix made me do it, but, um, this has been very empowering for me. I haven’t done anything for myself, really. To help myself, ya know?”

  I twist my fingers together in my lap. I don’t know why I’m telling him this.

  “I just don’t want to go back to the bad place in my mind. But…” I’m not making any sense to him. He doesn't know me or what I’ve been through.

  Yet I keep going.

  “But this is something I did something for me. So I’m not as messed up, and I’m-I’m proud of myself. I have you to thank for that. Thank you for agreeing to do this and for getting me to trust you. That’s pretty hard to do, but you really went above and beyond what you ever had to do for me.”

  My cheeks flame. I don’t know why I just said all that.

  Cut stares at me intensely for a long moment before dropping to his haunches in front of me.

  “It’s been my pleasure.”

  He’s so intense. I can’t look at him. “Uh… yeah. I’m sure,” I mutter sarcastically.

  “I don’t say shit I don’t mean.”

  I completely believe that. I give him a courteous nod. He stands and I follow, still fidgeting.

  There’s a super long, awkward silence, before Cut lets out a deep grumble-sigh.

  “I’ll give Nix my card. If you want to keep training or sporadically do this, go ahead and call me.”

  My eyes widen. “But… you said only two?”

  “Yeah,” he sighs. “I did.”

  “But this is the second.” Duh.

  “I like you. Don’t have the heart to turn you away.”

  I smile at that a little. He’s such a big man with angry red scars, but he’s literally such a teddy bear.

  “Thank you.”

  “Yeah. I have to go. Maria wants us to go out with Rose and Sven to boost Rose’s morale.”

  My eyebrows raise. He doesn’t seem like the “going out”, double date type.

  “I’m not excited,” he says flatly. “But she insisted.”

  I smile a little. “You’re so nice.”

  “You met Maria briefly. When you get to know her, you’ll see she can be demanding.”

  “I gathered that a bit.”

  He nods, but his eyes are bright and crinkled around the corners.

  “I’m sure I’ll be seeing you around. Take care of yourself.”

  “I will,” I whisper.

  “And girl?” he calls, looking over his shoulder on the way out.

  “Yeah?”

  “Your dad, it’s not your fault. Not one bit.”

  Then he’s gone and my emotions are torn in twenty different directions.

  “You think this is okay? I’m sure they have a cook and stuff. This is a reader’s favorite recipe, spiced tempeh over garlic-tahini-coated barley.”

  Nix is chuckling. “Adam won’t care. Lacey and Rose will be so in love with you, they won’t notice the food. You could have microwaved broccoli for all they’re gonna care.”

  The idea of putting that little thought into guests in our home has my eyes widening.

  He laughs harder, coming over and wrapping his arms around me. “It’s funny. In so many ways, you are so unlike your parents, but in others…” He smirks. “The princess title becomes very fitting.”

  I swat at his head. “Asshole. I don’t act like a princess!”

  “Do you see our house? Our lovely, masculine home. It’s ruined.”

  I look around, seeing the plates adorning the counters, the soft classical music playing in the background, and the movies I have stuffed away.

  He’s being dramatic.

  I smirk and walk over to him, making sure my hips sway side to side. He doesn’t miss it. I see the way his eyes home in on the motion, darkening. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and press my hips against his.

  “Sage…” he groans.

  “You’re lucky, Nixon, that I let you keep it masculine 99.9% of the time.” I graze my finger along the top of his basketball shorts, feeling him grow hard against me. “Not many princesses would do that.”

  “So lucky,” he whispers, nipping at my ear.

  “Good,” I cut in, pulling away, leaving him there, turned on and confused. “Think twice before you insult me next time.”

  I turn away, grinning.

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck?”

  Nix’s arms wrap around me from behind. I burst out laughing.

  “You can’t leave me hanging like that.”

  I shriek when he pulls me right off the ground and charges to our room.

  “Nix,” I laugh. “They’re gonna be here any minute. It will kind of ruin all my planning if I look like I’ve just been fucked.”

  I swat his back.

  “Set me down.”

  He sets me down. Even joking, it’s sort of not funny to me not to be heard when it comes to sex.

  He’s staring at me right now with the most pouty expression that I can’t help but laugh. I lace my fingers through his and drag him to the bedroom. When we get there, I gently push him down on the bed so he’s sitting. I kneel between his spread thighs.

  “Sage,” Nix almost whimpers.

  Damn. I guess with my dad and my guilt and my swirling thoughts, we really haven’t had sex in a while.

  “I’ll take care of you.”

  “Your guests. You don’t have to. I-I was kidding.”

  I almost laugh when I slide my hand down the front of his pants. He’s hard as hell.

  “Kidding?”

  I start to massage his balls. He actually does whimper this time, but gi
ves me a lazy smirk.

  He’s so hot.

  I chuckle and grab the edge of his pants. He lifts his hips so I can slide them off him and down to his ankles. I drag his boxers down with them.

  His cock is there, throbbing in front of me.

  I slide my hand down it once before gently licking the tip, then taking him in my mouth. He groans and slides his fingers through my hair.

  “Fuckkk, Sage!” he hisses when I deep throat him. If one good thing came from my past, it’s that I know how to please the man I truly love.

  I smile and lick him up and down once. I slowly massage his balls, feeling his hands tighten in my hair so the pull in my scalp is nearly painful. He’s turning me on and I didn’t want that. We have guests coming over. This is crazy!

  I can’t help it, though. His deep, guttural noises as I take him deep in my throat, the pain in my scalp, the way he desires me, is all making my panties grow damp. I don’t even realize my hips are undulating against the floor until Nix yanks my head back and looks at me with dark eyes.

  “Touch yourself,” he commands.

  “I…”

  He raises his eyebrows and pulls me back against him. He’s. So. Hot.

  I let my hand slide down my flowy tank top and into my panties. I whimper against his cock and start to grind harder. Nix’s hips start to push forward, pushing him deeper inside me. Sensing he’s close, I force my hands away from my core and start to massage his thighs, next to his dick. He groans, loud and deep, before his release floods my mouth. I pull away and smile a little as I swallow him.

  “Lie back.”

  I definitely don’t argue. I quickly throw my skirt and panties off and lie back against the bed, legs spread, right there.

  Nix immediately gets between my legs and brings me to cum the same way I did him. I bite the side of my hand to hold back my screams.

  When we’re both taken care of and breathing heavily, Nix pulls me into his arms and holds me.

  Always.

  He always does that. He doesn’t let my mind go anywhere but here.

  “Let’s get cleaned up,” he says gently.

  I kiss his cheek and get up. He’s chuckling as he gets himself together first, because he’s faster, and then goes back out to the living room. I take a few moments to look myself in the mirror. I shouldn’t throw up anymore. I have to be healthy. For this. For him.

  I throw water on my face, apply my blush, and do some things to fix my now-shoulder-length hair. Signs of the ragged cut have all but vanished.

  Bzzzz. Bzzzz.

  “They’re here!” I scream.

  My heart starts to hammer.

  What if Nix’s sister doesn’t like me? What if I have a panic attack? I can’t move.

  “Sage.” Nix comes up behind me and kisses my temples. “You’ve planned for this for days. They can’t wait to meet you. This is literally years in the making.”

  He laces his fingers through mine and pulls me gently out of the room.

  “But Adam saw me—”

  “Adam has seen worse. Promise. He’s not judging you.”

  Once I’m in the living room, I freeze. Nix lets me go and heads for the door. He gives me one look before swinging the door open.

  I wanna hide.

  Where’s Pamela?

  Three people stand there. I recognize Adam. He looks the same. Powerful. Clothed in Armani. Looking very much like the mafia boss I’ve been told he is. The other, I know, is Rose. I can tell from her pictures. She’s pretty tall, very thin, beautiful blonde hair and clear blue eyes. She’s stunning. Intimidatingly so.

  Then I make my way to the third person. She’s fidgeting pretty badly, dressed in an oversized, black, zip-up hoodie, baggy black skinny jeans, and Converse. Her hair is dirty blonde and slightly tangled. Her eyes catch my attention the most, though. They are a steel grey and intense.

  This is Lacey. I know immediately.

  Thankfully, Nix covers for me and my inability to speak.

  “Sis.”

  He wraps his arms around Rose first. She hugs him extra tight. They share a moment together. One I know is for Aaron’s death. When they pull away, he squeezes her shoulders. Then, Nix turns to Lacey.

  “Hey, kid.”

  “Hi.” Her voice is quiet and restrained.

  “Come on in, yeah?”

  She rushes in a little hurriedly. Adam immediately follows her. When she’s closer, I catch the bump in her jacket. Oh, yeah, she was pregnant. She had a baby recently.

  Lastly, Nix shakes Adam’s hand as Rose enters the house. Her eyes lock on me first. She heads right on over. Even though I talked to her on the phone quite recently, I feel the need to run away and let Nix talk to his people. These are his people. Not mine.

  “Hi, Sage,” Rose says gently. “Your house looks so amazing. I love the music.”

  “Thanks,” I murmur.

  She smiles. “Nix tells me you have a blog.”

  I nod. “Yeah, it’s just a vegan recipe blog. That’s all.”

  “That’s all? Are you kidding me? I bet that’s a lot more work than it looks. Not to mention, that’s awesome that you’re so healthy. You could give me some tips.”

  “I’d love for you to come home vegan, Rose. Sven would love that,” Adam calls over with a glint in his eye.

  Rose smirks and turns back to me. “Yeah, you really have to make me vegan. Sven would literally die. I can’t imagine if I started making him tofu and veggies for dinner.”

  She snorts.

  “Nix was pretty bad when we met. Literally, his pantry was atrocious,” I say quietly.

  Nix winks at me, making my cheeks heat. Rose’s smile widens at that.

  “Oh my gosh, you guys are the cutest!” she whisper-screams, making my cheeks turn an even deeper shade of red. “Anyway, come meet Lacey.”

  She takes my hand and leads me over to the others. I’m pretty sure my heart rate is over 200 at this point.

  When she stops, I know I’m in front of them.

  “Hi, Sage, it’s good to see you again.”

  That’s Adam. I know he’s trying to be gentle. I know. I know I’m completely not being rational, being so overwhelmed by this. I know I’m crazy. I really know something’s wrong with me when Nix wraps an arm around me and I feel Rose staring at me sympathetically.

  But I can’t stop it.

  “Wanna go outside?” a small, husky voice cuts over all the noise in the room.

  I finally look up. A pair of grey eyes are on me, gentle and understanding, but there’s something in them I recognize. I don’t know what it is, but it’s something I haven’t seen in anybody else.

  She tilts her head and nods a little, encouraging me to listen.

  “Yes, please,” I whisper.

  Nix squeezes my hip before releasing me. I quickly run to the door. Lacey’s the one who opens it and leads us outside, though. I feel uncomfortable just walking out. She seems okay with it.

  When we get to the side of the house, we both pause.

  “It can be a lot,” she says, breaking the silence. “I know.”

  I look over at her. “I’m just not used to it. It’s been me and Nix for so long. My little circle of people. It’s been so long since I had guests like this.”

  “You did better than I would have in your position.”

  “Wanna sit?” I gesture to the concrete. She smiles a little and plops right down, crisscross. I like her already. I’m comfortable around her.

  I follow her lead.

  “So you train with Cut all the time?” I ask her.

  Her eyes light up. “Yes, every day. He really is the best. I mean, seriously. He saved my life.”

  I can’t help but smirk a little. “Yeah, I’ve only trained with him twice, but he helped me out in a real time of need. Not boxing-related,” I add.

  “You should keep training with him.” She rolls her eyes. “He’ll try to tell you he doesn’t train women, but just push him a little. He will. He’s a
softie. If, for any reason, he still doesn’t listen, we can sic Maria on him.”

  I actually feel my smile spread to my eyes at that.

  “Good thinking, but he actually already offered.”

  “Oh, do it! Best choice you’ll ever make. I’m ten times the person I was.”

  “Really? Wow, that’s high praise.”

  She shrugs. “I was a mess. What can I say?”

  “Well, you saved me from my near breakdown, so clearly I’m a mess, too.”

  “You know everyone’s been telling me we’d get along well. You’ve been this, like, mystery person.”

  “Same! Oh my gosh. All the time.”

  She smiles. “It’s ‘cause we’re both crazy.”

  I throw my head back and laugh, before smiling at her. She’s giggling a little at the ground.

  It goes quiet for a long moment.

  “Let’s go back inside and get this over with. I’ll stay by you and make sure no one gets all up in your space.”

  “I don’t want to trouble you,” I mutter.

  “No trouble. I know them all.”

  She jumps to her feet and extends a hand. I slowly take it, curling my fingers around hers. She has no trouble pulling me to my feet.

  She stares at me warmly for a moment before shaking her head and running inside with me. She doesn’t leave my side. Not once.

  I sit on a barstool, Lacey next to me, while Adam and Nix stand and Rose sits on the couch. Nix and Rose are bantering. Lacey is as quiet as me and Adam just observes, keeping his focus mainly on Lacey.

  “So, Sage, Nix tells us you like to read?” Rose asks. I admire her. No matter how weird I’ve been, she doesn’t let that influence her opinion of me. She keeps trying to reach me. Nix did tell me she worked in a treatment center. And I am a mental case. So I guess it works.

  “Yeah, I think it’s at addiction status at this point.”

  Nix snorts. “She’s not kidding.”

  “Hey!” I yell.

  He goes into a cabinet in the dining room, takes one of the author merch pillows I hid, and chucks it at my head. I laugh when it hits me. I show it to Lacey and tell her what it is. She giggles.

  “Do you keep these out when guests aren’t here?” she whispers in my ear.