Metal Boxes

by Alan Black

  “Grandpa sounds like a smart man.”

  “Well, honestly we listen to Grandpa because Grandma would kick our tails if we didn’t, but that is a whole different family issue. Anyway, my question is: what is an F.N.G? You said it was someone you train?”

  “The N.G. is the New Guy,” Allie smiled.

  Stone nodded. “Okay, new guy, the trainee. I get it. But what does the F stand…oh…never mind. I understand.”

  “The F.N.G. is the guy who is so new he is liable to do something stupid to get himself and everyone around him killed,” Allie replied with a laugh.

  “I guess that would be me,” Stone laughed with her. “You know Allie, normally by now I would be dragging myself into bed to catch up on sleep before tonight’s watch, but I have enjoyed myself enough that I am wide awake. Honestly, thank you for letting me join you. This has been the best time I have had since I joined the navy.”

  “This is your best time?!” Allie looked shocked. “Oh hell no! You’ve got to have been in service for eleven, maybe fourteen months and this little thing is the best? New orders, Mister Midshipman Stone. You are comin’ with me to a marine soirée. You can’t drink with the big boys. No, I know by law you are old enough to drink because you enlisted in the navy, but you can’t drink today because you have to go stand third watch in ten hours or so. Believe me, stayin’ sober is much to be preferred over a regimen of detox just before an eight hour work shift.”

  Stone really wanted to go. He would have followed Allie anywhere, but he asked, “Are you sure? I mean, will a navy midshipman showing up at a marine function be welcome?”

  Allie reached across the table and grabbed his hand. “Stone, you are going as my guest, as my escort, as my date. No one will even question who you are beyond that.” She gave his hand a squeeze and let it go. “However, since you are the ‘man who eats marines for breakfast’ you are a celebrity of sorts. I imagine even Lieutenant Heller will want to buy you drinks.”

  Stone stood again. “Lieutenant Vedrian, although you have ordered me to go, I must decline the order. I will go because I want to go and for no other reason.”

  Allie stood and led him out of the room. She said to him over her shoulder, “You have had a strange military career so far if you think orders are only good if you don’t like them.”

  Allie led Stone to the elevators, where they shot down the central tower going deep into marine country. It was a part of the ship Stone had been told to avoid. It was not exactly off limits, like the bridge or the engine rooms. It was just that he had been told marines did not like navy.

  Stone did not see any evidence he was unwelcome. Most of the enlisted ranks in the corridors simply plastered themselves against the bulkheads to give them room to pass. Most of the enlisted also spoke to them, pleasantly, friendly and apparently doing so because they wanted to speak, not because regulations required them to do so.

  Allie was giving Stone a running commentary on the Ol’ Toothless’ marine country. He was surprised to learn this deck was a mixture of officer quarters and enlisted barracks. He was more surprised Allie expected it to be that way.

  She said, “Look, the enlisted grunts need to have access to their officers and the other way around. Each man has to trust who leads him. Each leader has to trust those in his command will follow where he leads. Anything less is unacceptable in a combat unit. Where did you grow up, Stone?”

  Stone hesitated. He was not ashamed of where he grew up. It just was not as glamorous as he would have liked. He wanted to impress Allie, to show her that he was not just a freighter’s kid.

  Allie turned to him. “Come on, Stone. I know you grew up on stations and ships. You are a freighter’s kid, right? Growing up between star ports and spending more time in jump space than in open air?”

  Stone nodded. “Yes, sir. I was born to a couple on a freighter. We moved to another one with my grandparents. I don’t think I breathed open air until I was thirteen. It was not a very exciting life.”

  “Not exciting! Are you kiddin’ me? You grew up traveling among the stars. You saw alien races, visited strange cultures on far off planets. You ate…well, weird stuff. I would have traded you for my life in a heartbeat.”

  “Really? I lived my life and it doesn’t sound all that exciting.”

  “I grew up in a small farm town on such a dull planet that excitement was going down to the ag-hall to watch the lumpers load potatoes.”

  “You grew up on a potato farm?”

  “Oh, gods no. That would have been unbearable. My mother was a clergy at a small community church. She also did sewing and laundry to make ends meet. But, we didn’t grow potatoes. Every farm in two hundred kilometers grew potatoes though. I can’t stand potatoes anymore, not in any form. But, I can tell you, I would have swapped places with you growing up and paid you to boot. In fact, I used to watch vids about independent freighters and dream I was a part of their family…crap! Adventures in space! That is why I joined the marines. Hey, did you ever watch those vids?”

  “Um, not really, Mom wasn’t big on watching vids. Dad thought it was a waste of time, you know?”

  “Yeah, you know my favorite was ‘The Stone Freight Company’. It was supposed to be based on a true family and…” She stopped and looked at him.

  Stone decided it was time to change the subject. “Okay Allie. What has how I grew up got to do with allowing officers and enlisted access to each other?”

  Allie shook her head. “It is the same thing on freight ships. You have to lead people, and to lead them, they must trust you, right?”

  Stone nodded. “Yes, but on a commercial vehicle the crew is there because they want to be. They can quit anytime they want and leave the ship at any port. They can get paid and move on.”

  Allie said, “Yeah, just like the guest staring roles on the vids ‘The Stone Freight Company’.” She looked at him to see his reaction.

  Stone kept his face clear of reaction. He ignored the probe into his family life. “I can see that with civilians. But this is the military. We have to follow orders, right? The enlisted must follow orders or go to the brig.”

  Allie reached across and laid her arm across his shoulders. “That, my young midshipman, is an attitude that keeps young marine second lieutenants from living long enough to get promoted to first lieutenant. Think about it, who would you rather have follow you, a group of guys who are there because they have to be there or a team of men who are following you because they trust you to make the best decisions for their lives?” She squeezed his shoulder and let him go.

  Stone missed the warmth across his shoulders even though the air in the corridor was more than comfortable.

  “Is that attitude why all of you seem to be jammed in here together?” He asked.

  Allie laughed, “I am permanent party on the Ol’ Toothless. I have a room on the deck below that I split with another marine. All of the permanent staff has semi-private rooms. Major Numos is the highest ranking permanent staff; he gets a private room as does the highest ranking transient marine. Everybody else is crammed in wherever we can put them. The enlisted are generally in barracks of a hundred or so. Why?”

  Stone was shocked. “I am probably the lowest ranking naval officer on this ship. I have a private room. It isn’t big, but I don’t have to share with anyone. This ship is big enough that we should have plenty of available rooms for all of the marines.”

  Allie smiled, “Thank you for the thought. If you ever make admiral then you can change things around here. But until then, most of these marines are just cargo. The navy picks them up here and drops them off there. There isn’t anything fancy or special about it. Major Numos, myself, Lieutenants Hammermill and Heller are permanent staff, but we are just cargo handlers.”

  “But-”

  “Don’t sweat it, Stone. No one wants marines to get too comfortable anyway. That’s why we are goin’ to work on your math. How many marines can the navy fit in the smallest possible space? Oops, it is p
arty time. Here we are. You just stick close for a bit.”

  Before Stone and Allie were two meters into the room a wild whoop split the air around the already ear splitting noise of the room. A swirling mass of muscles wrapped in a hideously garish, flowered shirt swept Stone off his feet. He was held in the air as if he were a hard won sports trophy.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Stone heard Allie shout, “Hammer, put my boyfriend down.”

  As soon as his feet hit the deck, he saw Lieutenant Hammermill grinning at him.

  Stone came to attention and said, “Sir, it is good to see you again.”

  Hammermill grinned bigger and leaned in, his breath wrapping Stone in strong, alcoholic vapor, “Stuff it, Stone. Damn it, Heller is going to go ape-shit when he hears you’re here. He has taken so much flack for you backing him down that he is about to bust his buttons.”

  Stone turned to Allie, “Lieutenant Vedrian, I don’t want to be the cause of any disturbance, perhaps I should excuse myself?”

  Allie cocked her head in a strange sideways tilt and asked, “Afraid of Hell-bent?”

  “Oh yes!” Stone grinned at her. “I would have to be insane if I wasn’t afraid. I have met Lieutenant Heller once, remember? He is twice my size and unless he has changed in the last few months, he has more muscle than brains.”

  Hammermill laughed and staggered slightly. “The navy’s got you there, Vedrian. If anything, Hellion has grown more muscles.”

  Stone leaned forward into Hammermill and placed a hand on the marine's chest. Hammermill looked down at the hand with a puzzled expression on his face. Stone shoved as hard as he could and send the drunken marine backwards onto the deck.

  Stone grinned at Allie again. “Still, if Heller is in no better shape than the Hammer I might get away with only a month or so in the infirmary. We can look at it like a vacation from warehouse three-whiskey.” He stretched a hand out to Hammermill to help the man up.

  Hammermill looked at the hand as if confused about what it was doing and why he was on the deck.

  “Let me help you up,” Stone said. “You must have tripped over your own big feet, marine.”

  Hammermill grabbed the hand and grinned up at Stone. “It happens to me and my big feet all the time.” The marine leered at Allie and said, “You know what they say about men with big feet, don’t you?”

  Stone laughed, “Yeah, they have to wear big shoes.”

  Hammermill pulled on Stone’s hand trying to lever himself to his feet. All he accomplished was to pull Stone off his feet. Stone landed on top of Hammermill’s chest.

  “Hammer, you are heavy,” Stone said. “How much do you weigh?”

  “With or without a load of beer?” Hammermill laughed.

  Both men looked to see another marine drop to the deck next to them. The man pounded the deck next to Hammermill three times and shouted. “Pin. Ladies and gentlemen, the Hammer pinned in the first round by the challenger, the wiry and ferocious Midshipman…” the man leaned into the two and checked Stone’s nametag on his uniform, “…Stone. Wait! Is this the infamous Midshipman Stone who beat Heller into submission? Oh, man. I gotta buy you a drink.”

  Allie picked Stone up by the back of his shirt and lifted him bodily to his feet. She dusted him off and dropped an arm possessively over his shoulder. “Not now, marine. Stone is with me, so his first one is on me.”

  “You got it, Vedrian,” the man nodded. He poked Stone in the chest. “But, I owe you one, boy. Don’t you dare leave this party without hunting me down, got it?”

  “Aye, aye, sir,” Stone nodded smiling.

  Hammermill scrambled to his feet mumbling about having to find Heller.

  “Don’t worry about Lieutenant Heller,” Allie said.

  “I am not really worried,” Stone replied with a nod, “I just didn’t want to be the cause of an incident that would break the decorum of the going away ceremony, but I guess it’s not that kind of party.”

  Allie laughed. “No. It’s not that kind of party at all. Let’s get you to the bar.”

  “I am still not drinking, am I?” Stone asked as he allowed himself to be led through the crowd.

  “Nope. I just need a safe place to park you for a minute or two.” She pointed to an empty stool between two women, both as massive as Vedrian. “Park it between these two refugees from a New Vegas brothel.”

  Both women looked at Allie and scratched on their faces with a raised middle finger. One of the women looked at Stone and back at Allie. She shook her head.

  “Slumming with the navy, Vedrian? I heard you would sleep with any swinging meat.”

  Allie laughed. “You’re just jealous. This is Midshipman Stone. He’s the man who took out LT Hell on Lazzaroni Station a few months back. And you must have missed it, but he just pinned the Hammer in a wrestling match not two minutes ago over by the door.”

  Allie turned and called over the bartender. The man came over shaking his head.

  “I can’t serve either one of you, Lieutenant. I got orders from Major Numos.”

  Allie nodded. “I know the Major says no marine is to be served in uniform, Gunny. I am going to go change out of this monkey suit and into civvies.” She dropped her voice so the bartender had to lean in to hear. Stone was sure even the two ladies on either side of him could not hear her. “But, you can serve Midshipman Stone, because all he is going to drink is cola. And that is an order, too. Cola, got me?”

  “I got it, Lieutenant. Cola,” the gunny nodded in reply.

  “If anyone asks why you are serving drinks to someone in uniform you can tell them he is navy, not marines, so the orders don’t apply,” Allie said. “And put his cola in a cocktail glass with funny fruit and frilly umbrellas. Call it anything you want, no matter what someone orders for him, give him a cola.”

  “You betcha, boss,” Gunny grinned. “By the end of the night, Midshipman Stone will have a reputation for being able to drink the universe’s most toxic swill and remain sober. Mister Stone, your first glass of Albiean Harmonic Six-Step is on the way.”

  “Look, Stone. I need to take a few minutes to powder my nose and change into somethin’ less uniform-like. You be okay here?” Allie asked.

  “Answer me one question first,” Stone said. “You did call me your boyfriend, didn’t you?”

  Allie looked down at the deck. “Yeah, I did. Sorry, I didn’t mean to be…” Her voice trailed off. “Dammit, I didn’t expect to ever become a cougar. Look, I know I am too old for you, but…well…dammit say something.”

  “Allie Vedrian,” Stone smiled. “My mother is fifteen years older than my father. They have had twenty good years together so far. I am not saying we are getting married and having children, but age doesn’t matter to me. Besides, you can’t be anymore than five or six years older than me.”

  “Five or six years. As if!” Allie laughed.

  Stone replied with a laugh. “Five or fifty; you are a beautiful woman and there isn’t a man worth his salt on this ship who wouldn’t give his right arm to be your boyfriend.”

  Allie put a hand on his face and leaned in to kiss him gently on the lips. “Yep. I am going to whatever hell is reserved for cougars and cradle robbers. I’ll be back soon,” She sighed.

  “And I will be waiting,” Stone smiled.

  The woman on his right poked him in the ribs to get his attention. “You really the Stone that took down Hell-on-wheels?”

  “Well, I wouldn’t call anyone a liar if they said it was me. I don’t know what you heard but I did meet Lieutenant Heller on Lazzaroni Station,” Stone said.

  “And you just pinned Hammermill in a wrestling match? Without ruffling your uniform?” The other woman asked.

  Stone said, “Well-”

  A voice bellowed in Stone’s ear. “There he am!” He spun to see Lieutenant Hammermill standing there.

  Hammermill said, “Crap. You already got a drink. What did you give him, Gunny?”

  The bartender winked at Stone. “Lieutena
nt Hammermill, that is an Albiean Harmonic Six-Step. The most lethal drink this side of the Alarii Rift. Drink one and in six steps you drop to the deck.”

  Hammermill shouted. “Get it drunk down, Mister Stone. Bring him another, Gunny. No, no, no. Gunny, bring him one of those Purple Jeezus things you make. Any man who can put me on my backside on the deck gets drinks on me. And bring one for me.”

  “Hey, Hammer. This shrimp really pin you to the deck?” The woman on Stone’s right looked at him in doubt.

  “Yep. I am embarrassed as I can be. I didn’t even see it coming. I think he did it with one hand. We were faced off and the next thing I know I am on the deck with him sitting on my chest. Must be some new martial arts or somethin’ that I ain’t never seen before.”

  “Sounds like a load of pockey hucks to me,” she sneered.

  “Like I give a crap what it sounds like to you,” Hammer sneered back. “There must a been a dozen guys around that saw it. You go ask. You go on. Scoot! You’re taking up space on my barstool anyway.”

  Hammermill gestured for Stone to move over onto the stool the woman vacated. Hammermill sat in the seat Stone had been in. He initially faced Stone, but he gave a silly grin and spun the barstool so his back was to Stone. He leaned into the woman who had been on Stone’s left.

  Stone heard him say to the woman, “Why, hello Junie, fancy meeting you here.”

  The bartender set a second glass in front of Stone. It was purple and garnished with a small wooden cross. He put an identical drink in front of Hammermill

  “What is that, Gunny?” Stone stared at the drink.

  “That is what Lieutenant Hammermill ordered for you,” Gunny answered. “I hope you aren’t particularly religious. That is my Purple Jeezus. It is purple and if you drink enough you will see Jeezus. Don’t worry; it is just like Lieutenant Vedrian ordered.”

  “Thank you, Gunny,” Stone said.

  “One small piece of advice if I may, Mister Stone?”

  “Of course, Gunny, please speak freely,” Stone said,