UNBROKEN (Friends, Lovers, or Nothing Book 5)

by Jackie Chanel

  All movement in the waiting room stopped when Tahir walked in and walked straight over to Jermaine and Peaches. He waved me over. Speaking in hushed tones because we weren’t the only family in the operating room, he told us that we had to make a decision. They couldn’t remove the remaining parts of the placenta because they were attached too deeply. She’d lost almost four pints of blood and they had no other lifesaving options.

  “Do it,” Jermaine answered quickly. His wife was sobbing almost hysterically. “Do whatever you need to do to keep her alive.”

  Tahir nodded. “It won’t be much longer.”

  The four of us walked away headed in three different directions. I was completely numb. I couldn’t even think of words to say, let alone make my mouth move to say them. My mother looked up at me full of hope. All I could do was shake my head.

  I walked over to Delilah and Summer, scooped up my little girl, and headed to the elevators. Summer didn’t ask any questions. Kids are like animals. They can sense when something is wrong. Instead of talking, we got out on the fifth floor, the maternity ward, and watched Winter sleep in the nursery. Tears rolled down my face as I stared at the angelic face of my child.

  The last child I will ever have.

  Chapter 29: Break of Dawn

  OPEN YOUR EYES, I silently demanded. I was freezing from head to toe despite being covered with blankets. I moved my head to the side and my eyes roamed around the unfamiliar room. This wasn’t the same hospital room I’d been in earlier. This one was quieter without the hustle and bustle of the maternity ward. I opened and closed my hands and noticed that a needle was held in place with tape on the top of my left hand. There was a thick tube attached that was attached to a blood bag labeled O+.

  Before I even opened my eyes, I knew that Aiden was in the room. The scent of his cologne was faint but I recognized the rhythm of his breathing. My eyes were only partially open but I saw his golden blonde hair as he rested his head on his arms on the bed. I moved my hand slightly and touched his hair. The small movement felt like I was trying to wade through mud.

  “Hey,” I croaked out. My throat was sore and scratchy. My voice was hoarse.

  Aiden sat up quickly. His green eyes shimmered with tears. Sadness reflected in them. He looked like he’d been crying for hours. Aiden brushed my hair away from my face and kissed my forehead then both of my cheeks. Everything felt dry so I was glad that he avoided my lips until I could put on some Chapstick.

  “I love you,” Aiden whispered.

  “Love you too. Where’s Winter?”

  “Upstairs in the nursery. She’s fine.”

  “Am I?” I asked cautiously.

  I had a feeling that I wasn’t. Quick memories of panicked nurses, blood gushing down my legs, and doctors yelling all hit me before I had completely opened my eyes. I was alive but something terrible had happened in order for me to be here. I could feel it.

  “What? Just tell me, Aiden.”

  “Dr. Margolis gave me these.” He reached into his back pocket and pulled out some folded papers and what looked like a brochure. “I don’t understand all the details. Dr. Margolis and Tahir said that a large piece of placenta had attached to your uterus and they couldn’t stop the bleeding. You lost so much blood, Sunny. They didn’t have a choice, baby. You could have died.”

  What he wasn’t saying hurt more…scared me more than the words that were coming out of Aiden’s mouth. I knew he was trying to deliver the worst news without having to actually say the words. I caught the H-Y-S on one of the brochures before he even started explaining. However, I needed to hear the word that I couldn’t say myself. As much as it pained me to put the man that I love in that situation, I had to hear him say the word.

  “What did they do?”

  “They…” He choked up and fat tears fell from his eyes and hit the blanket. “They removed your uterus. I’m so sorry, Sunny. I’m so sorry. They had to. We couldn’t lose you.”

  Slowly, I moved my hand over my stomach. I could feel the bandages underneath my fingers. My child that I carried for thirty-five weeks was gone, upstairs being watched over by a caring staff of nurses and all of her family, I’m sure. But another part of me was gone too, one of the most important parts. The part that made me a woman.

  A lump formed in my throat. I realized that the other IV in my arm was probably Fetanyl or morphine, which is why I didn’t feel any physical pain. There was real pain though. My heart and soul felt as if they were being ripped apart.

  “I’m sorry,” I wept.

  “Baby, don’t say that,” Aiden replied through his own tears. “None of this was your fault. You did everything right. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it. I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

  “I want my baby,” I cried softly. “I just want to see her.”

  But I was in recovery so there was no way I could go up to the maternity ward and hold my newborn baby. That was the worst part.

  When Tahir and the anesthesiologist were confident that I was out of the woods, they moved to the ICU and kept me heavily medicated on the strongest pain medication available because the pain in between doses was unbearable. I’d just delivered a baby and had emergency surgery all within twenty-four hours. I was actually glad that I was asleep for most of the time I was in the ICU. Sleeping allowed me not to think about the hysterectomy.

  During the brief moments I was awake, Mama and Dina Facetimed Aiden and me from the nursery so I could see Winter. She’s such an adorable and beautiful baby. She’s got my coloring and my eyes. Mama says she looked just like did when I was a baby. She’s so precious.

  Winter is here and she’s healthy. I want to believe that’s all that matters but I can’t. Every time her face showed up on Aiden’s phone, the thought that she’s the last child I’ll ever carry and she’s not a boy hit me harder than the time before. Aiden really wants a son and I will never be able to give him one. No drug can alleviate that pain.

  ***

  I was moved from the ICU to the maternity ward after three long days. I was glad because now I had twenty-four hour access to my newborn baby for the remainder of my hospital stay.

  When I woke up this morning, the smell of fresh flowers assaulted me. Overnight, my plain private room had been transformed into a flower garden. I was still heavily medicated and immediately thought I was dreaming as my vision was pummeled with bursts of pink—so much pink— that I had to close my eyes and open them again. Pink flowers, pink balloons, giant pink teddy bears. It looked like a bomb had gone off in a cotton candy factory. There were more pastel colors in here than in the Easter department at Target.

  I didn’t have to look very far to discover the culprits behind this explosion of pastel pink. Aiden and Summer walked into the room carrying another bouquet of pink, yellow, and baby blue flowers and balloons. My mom was already clearing a space on a table for the vase she was holding.

  “What did you do?” I asked. Either one was free to answer.

  Aiden’s boyish grin was guilty as hell, so guilty that I had to laugh. I knew it.

  “Someone forgot to send over the confidentiality agreements to the hospital and you were admitted under your real name. We don’t know who called the paparazzi but everyone knows our baby was born. I think it was even on CNN.”

  That was my mistake. I thought I had a few more weeks so I hadn’t even mentioned to my lawyer that we needed to get that paperwork over to the hospital. Dr. Margolis was discreet but obviously, the rest of the staff wasn’t.

  “Let me guess; all of this is from your fans?”

  “Not just my fans,” Aiden said. “You’re pretty famous too.”

  I looked around the room. The balloons and flowers were the only thing that felt joyous. As bad as I felt, I wasn’t prepared for how bad everyone else felt. None of them had the essence of their womanhood removed but they stayed on the verge of tears. It was annoying. Aiden and I still had issues to resolve but with my mother and his mom hardly ever le
aving my room, they would have to wait. There was no way we could discuss his walking out and everything else that plagued our relationship, not now.

  I wasn’t the only one dealing with the after effects of my…post-partum hemorrhage is what they were calling it along with placenta acreta. The medical terminology didn’t mean anything to me. The universe had stolen my ability to bear any more children with the man I’m planning on spending my life with. What a cruel bitch.

  A nurse rolled Winter’s bassinet into the room and announced that it was feeding time. Breastfeeding was impossible. The surgery and IVs made it difficult to sit up and hold her in a position so she could eat. Moreover, I didn’t want all the medication I was on entering her fragile system.

  I fed my child while Summer sat on the bed with me and watched. Aiden sat in a chair next to the bed and spent the next hour on his phone. . It was as quiet as a funeral home and I couldn’t take it, not from this group that consisted of the loudest people I know: Kat, Delilah, Aiden, Erica, Kirk, and my mama.

  “Alright!” I shouted at the small group of people in my room speaking in hushed tones as if speaking louder than a whisper would bother me. “Y’all are getting on my nerves for real! You don’t have to walk on eggshells around me or handle me with kid gloves. Let’s just talk about it, okay?”

  Mama and Kat each looked at me with sad eyes. “We just want you to be okay, Sunny. After the pain fades and the incision heals, what’s going to happen then? That’s what we’re worried about.”

  “What’s going to happen is that Aiden and I are going to get married. That’s what happens next. Yeah, it’s a hundred percent fucked up but I’m not going to allow this fucked up situation to be my only thought each and every day. I’m not going to let this consume me. Why should I? We have a brand new baby. I may not be able to get pregnant again, but do you know me at all? In case every single one of you forgot, I didn’t want to get pregnant the first time. Maybe two kids are enough for me. Y’all are moping around here acting like I’m dying. I’m pissed but I’m already a mother. They can’t take that from me.”

  “True,” Erica nodded. “And after how not fun these last eight months have been, maybe not being able to do it again is sort of a blessing.”

  “I wouldn’t go as far as saying that,” I chuckled. “But I did talk to my doctor. I still have ovaries. I can freeze my eggs.” I looked at Aiden. “He’s still fertile and we’re rich. We can get a surrogate. Hell, we can do what Kimye did and make sure we have a boy. We have options. It’s taken four days of intense conversations with doctors and therapists and my fiancé to get to this place where I’m actually okay. This isn’t happening to y’all so please get to that same place quicker.”

  “She read y’all,” Kirk said with a snap of his fingers. “To the moon and back, honey.”

  Everyone in the room started laughing. I looked down at my daughter. It even looked like she was trying to crack a smile. That’s what I needed to hear, that’s the energy I needed surrounding me. I’m not going to mourn the loss of any future pregnancies. I’m going to celebrate our present, and that’s me, Aiden, Winter, and Summer.

  Chapter 30: Back to Life

  BRINGING WINTER HOME five weeks earlier than we expected was a gift and a curse. We weren’t as prepared as we should have been. She didn’t have a nursery in my house so we had to bring her home to Sunny’s which I did not want to do. I had five weeks of events and shows that had to be canceled or reschedule because Sunny was still recovering from her surgery and I had to be at home to take care of her and the kids.

  Sunny was recovering well. She only had to stay in the hospital for a week before she was deemed physically and mentally ready to be released. She stayed in good spirits. I was a little anxious about that. She’d had major surgery and was now unable to have children. Surely, the other shoe was going to drop at any minute. There was no way she was as okay with what happened as she pretended to be.

  Although it hasn’t come up again, I’m still planning our move to Atlanta. I haven’t given up on the idea of leaving LA and I think Sunny should be onboard by now, especially after what happened last week when we were bringing Sunny and the baby home.

  We had security with us because it was a madhouse outside of the hospital. Ortiz was pushing Sunny in her wheelchair and I had Winter in her carrier. The Range Rover was only about ten feet from the hospital doors but it took five minutes to get through the throng of paparazzi yelling and snapping pictures. I had a blanket over Winter’s carrier for obvious reasons. We didn’t want our week old baby plastered all over Instagram and Twitter.

  As we were pushing through the people who rudely wouldn’t let us pass in peace, I saw a hand reach for the blanket covering Winter’s carrier. I didn’t even think about it. I just swung at the person reaching for my child. The camera fell from the photographer’s hand and hit the ground. I heard something break but I didn’t care.

  “I will fuck you up if you ever try to touch my kid!” I screamed and brought my foot down on the already cracked camera. “Don’t fuck with me, bitch!”

  “A.T., get in the car, man!” J.R. tried to coax me into the Range Rover but I was so mad that I wanted to hand Sunny the baby and rip that fucker’s head off.

  By the time we made it to Sunny’s and got her and Winter settled in, the video of the altercation was already up on multiple sites and people are still talking about it a week later.

  When I woke up this morning, I had an urgent message from Paulie that he needed to see me in his office, which meant I was in trouble.

  Since Jess was here with Sunny, Summer, and the baby, I could leave. I reminded her that no matter what she said, Sunny wasn’t allowed to walk any further than the bathroom, nor was she allowed to pick up anything heavier than our six-pound baby. Then I left.

  Getting out of that madhouse actually felt good even though I know exactly why my lawyer wanted to meet at his office. I just hoped it was only Paulie. I was not in the mood to deal with Roxy and Tracy too.

  My phone started to ring when I was about ten minutes away from Paulie’s office. It was my mother. She’d been staying at my house while Sunny’s house was full of her relatives.

  “Hey, Ma,” I answered. She was just the person I needed to speak to. I needed a favor.

  “Hello. How are my grandchildren?”

  “Fine. You know you can go over to the house anytime you want.”

  “I know. I don’t want to bother you and Sunny though. She’s still healing and everything.”

  “That doesn’t seem to keep anyone else from popping up any time they want. People have been through that house all week. Believe me; Sunny’s cool with it. I need a favor though.”

  “What?”

  “Can you get my sisters and meet me at Cut in about an hour? It’s in the Beverly Wilshire. There’s something I need to run by you all.”

  “Sure. We were getting together for lunch anyway.”

  I whipped my car into a parking space on the street right in front of Holmes, Sutter, and Holmes and walked inside. I’m not the firm’s most famous client nor am I even close to being its richest. That’s why they were okay with handing me over to their most junior associate. It’s nice for them to say that they rep Aiden Tyler, but Aiden Tyler doesn’t bring them a ton of billable hours either. They don’t like that.

  I headed straight to Paulie’s office. His assistant, Mel, made a big show of fixing her skirt and low-cut blouse as she escorted me into Paulie’s office. I just reminded her to feed the meter and if my Maserati got towed, she’d probably lose her job.

  I sat down in one of the overstuffed leather chairs at his desk. “What’s up?”

  “The photographer is going to be a problem.”

  “Fuck that douche! He tried to touch my kid. How much does he want?”

  “According to his lawyer, he wants his camera replaced and half a million in pain and suffering.”

  “He can suck half a million dicks and buy his own fucking
camera!” I was pissed. “You saw the video, right? I didn’t touch him.”

  “You touched a piece of equipment that he uses to provide for his family. Then you stomped on it and threatened him,” came a voice from behind me.

  Standing in the doorway was Paulie’s boss, Corwin Holmes, the senior partner in the entertainment division. As far as lawyers go, Corwin is fine. He doesn’t give Paulie a lot of shit when it comes to me. Even so, lawyer or not, I don’t care what the photographer said. He’s not getting a dime from me.

  “He’s going to sue you.”

  “I don’t care. People try to sue me all the time.”

  “Where was your manager when this happened?” Corwin asked.

  “I’m a grown man. I don’t need Roxy with me all the time. I had security with me.”

  “Have you considered that you need to travel with more than two security guards?”

  I glanced at Paulie. This guy couldn’t be serious. Traveling with the two I have is already two too many. I shook my head.

  “No, and I’m not. Listen fellas, if he sues, he sues. Handle it. The asshole tried to touch my kid. Tracy is already spinning this thing so I look like a hero. I was just a dad protecting his baby, and now the rest of them know not to mess with me and my kids anymore. And,” I said to Paulie. “Don’t do any of that Kanye settlement and apologizing shit. I’m not ever apologizing to him and he’s not getting my money. Matter of fact, counselor, I want him to publicly apologize to me and Sunny for putting our newborn in danger or we’re pressing charges. Make it happen.”

  I could tell that my best friend was on my side but he still glanced at his boss to see if my counter offer was acceptable. I didn’t bother turning around. I might write the check to Holmes, Sutter, and Holmes, but Paulie is my lawyer. I listen to my friend, not some suit who doesn’t even know my manager’s name.

  “Mr. Tyler,” Corwin began, “I don’t think that’s the best route to take here. This is LA. Even though they’re shit-eating vultures, the paparazzi out here win lawsuits. They’re invasive and scheming, but they are also the reason people care about celebrities. We have to tread light with them.”