In Love (The Knights of Mayhem Book 5)

by Brook Greene

  “What is it, honey?” My mother asks, laying her hand on the arm holding the papers.

  “It’s the divorce papers, and they’re signed.” I turn them to her, completely speechless over what I’m actually holding in my hand. I feel the color drain from of my face.

  She furrows her brows at me. “For real?” She jerks them from me and begins to read aloud the legal jargon.

  I lay back on my bed and listen to the words she says, not believing what I’m hearing. When she’s done, I pop back up. “They sound legit, don’t you think?”

  “They do, honey, but it’s Jake. I would at least go to the DA and ask his opinion.” She hands them back to me and pats my leg. “If you get up now, we can be there by one.”

  Elated as I am, my mother’s right. This could just be a perfect hoax orchestrated by Jake to make me ease up and let my guard down, again.

  I’m ready in record time and on my way to town, having left my mother behind. This is something I have to do alone, and she doesn’t need to be exposed to Jake’s twisted, sick sense of humor if that’s what all this is.

  ~~~~~~

  I walk through the metal detector and retrieve my pocketbook on the other side, along with the envelope, and head for the DA I’d called earlier.

  I walk into his office and his receptionist greets me. “Hello. Can I help you?” She’s young, and has a bright smile.

  “Yes, I’m Tessa Lennox. I’m here to see DA Murray.” I come to a stop in front of her desk.

  Her eyes grow wide at the sound of my name and she scrambles to her feet. “Yes, ma’am, wait right here.” She uses her index finger to stop me as she hurries off down a hall.

  She returns with an older gentleman following behind her with a soft smile on his face. He holds his hand out to me. “Ms. Kelly.” I shake his hand, but I’m a little confused with his reception. Jake had always told me his father knew people, just like he did, and this man’s overeager greeting has me wondering if I’m walking into a trap.

  He walks into an office and steps to the side, waiting for me to enter, then closes the door behind me. “Have a seat.” He points to a posh leather chair sitting across from his desk.

  He settles himself behind the big oak desk, resting his forearms and lacing his fingers together. “So, did you bring them?” he asks right out of the gate. “I’m prepared to push them through as soon as possible. Judge Watts is waiting for me to call.”

  My head is spinning, and the creepy monkey of doubt is swinging through my head. “Um…” I start, smiling at him. I lay the envelope on my lap, covering it with my hands. “I’ve been trying to get this taken care of for almost a year now. Why is it that all of a sudden, after Jake visited me last week,” I point to my face, knowing if he knows Jake and his father, this will be shared information, “making it a point to let me know I could never leave him, is this being handled so swiftly now?”

  He looks at me and smiles. “Sign the papers, Ms. Kelly. I promise you it’s in your best interest,” he informs me, but there’s no menace in his tone or words.

  I feel the flush of anger rise up my throat and heat my face. I’m done with men telling me what to do. “Not until you answer my questions.” I pound my finger on the hard wood to make my point.

  He sighs and stands, holding out his hand. “Come with me.”

  I glare up at him, not moving from my chair. He laughs and crosses his arms over his broad chest, leaning against his desk to look down at me. “I’m a friend, Tessa, and someone you’re very important to is a good friend of mine.” He leans into my space. “Enough to know what’s happened to you, and not just this. It pisses me off.” He offers me his hand again. “So, if you don’t mind, come with me, please.”

  ~~~~~~

  I walk out of the judge’s office vindicated from the chains of a marriage I should’ve never entered into to begin with, and indebted to a man who’d hidden parts of himself from me.

  I tuck the papers, signed and sealed, into my purse, tucking it securely onto my shoulder. My heels click on the marble and the sound echoes off the emptiness of the foyer of the courthouse.

  “Tessa.” A woman calls my name from behind me, so I turn to see a warm smiling face, Claire.

  “Hey.” I hold my arms out to her, embracing her as she does me. “It’s so good to see you.”

  She backs away, giving me a once-over. “You too.” She tries to cover her shock, but I can hear it in her voice. She sees, even though I’d caked on the makeup. She takes my hand and leads me over to a bench. “So when are you coming back to work?”

  My shoulders slump. Just another way that Matthew had taken control and fixed things for me. “I really don’t know, Claire. I might try to find something different somewhere else.”

  She forcefully takes my hand back. “No. You have a job waiting for you here.”

  I smile politely at her, knowing now is not the time to get into how I’m done excepting things from men who lie to me. But I had, over and over again, accepted the things Matthew has done for me, because in the end, they’d all been in my best interest, and things I’d so wanted. Does that make me selfish? No, I think it makes me a woman who’s learned to look out for herself and use people the way she has been used.

  She looks down at her watch. “Anyway, I’ve got to get back, but call me Monday and we’ll get the paperwork started for you to come back to work. Held your desk and everything.” She gives me kisses on both cheeks before she rushes off down the hall to the door I’d entered a little over a week ago for my first day of work.

  I turn for the door and walk out into the bright July sunshine. I shield my eyes, looking out over the busy town square, and they stop when I spot him standing by the fountain, waiting for me. I swallow the lump in my throat and summon up the courage I need to live the life I want. I walk down the steps as he starts for me.

  He stops right in my face. “Do you see this?” he yells at me, pointing to his busted-up face, which isn’t something I’m used to seeing Jake sport. “He did this. This was the cost of your fucking divorce.” At one time, Jake had been so good looking to me, then his ugliness broke through, ruining any expectations I had for us.

  I right my shoulders and actually smirk at the fucking asshole. “Hurts, doesn’t it?” For the first time in a long time, I’m not afraid of him. I have my freedom, and anything he does in public with the whole town watching I’m sure will be prosecutable. Not even his father can protect him. My beatings are public knowledge now, the pictures documented and filed, right along with the divorce papers.

  “You’ll pay, bitch, and so will he. Someday,” he sneers, but I don’t shy away. We stand there, suspended, the dark threat hanging between us, but the fear I should feel isn’t there. I just glare at him, and he takes a step back from me, spitting at my feet. He turns and walks to his truck and squeals the tires as he heads out of town.

  It’s over. It’s fucking over for me and him, no more Mr. and Mrs. Only him, and Tessa Kelly, a new woman who’s finally won her freedom.

  ~~~~~~

  Two weeks later…..

  Tessa

  I hadn’t been back to the clubhouse since the day my divorce had been granted, and even then, I’d just sat in my car watching it, but never seeing him. My mother chastised me for not calling and at least thanking him properly, but I couldn’t. The sound of his voice would break me all over again.

  So now I sit at my desk, pen in hand, wondering what to write in the generic thank you card I’d plan to send him. Distance is what I’d wanted, and that’s exactly what he’d given me. The wonder of what he’s doing is never far from my mind.

  “Are you still fussing over that damned card?” Claire asks from her desk.

  I sigh, sitting back in my chair, throwing the pen I hold onto my desk. “How do you say ‘sorry I was a bitch, but thank you for everything you’ve done for me’ without actually saying it?” I sit back up and rest my elbows on the desk, cradling my head in my hands.

 
“You don’t. Not in a card, anyway.” Her thick southern accent makes me smile, and I wonder if that’s how I sound to other people when I talk. She swivels around in her chair to face me. “What you do is, you go to that clubhouse, find him, and…” She looks around to see if anybody else is around or listening. When she finds the room empty, she turns back to me with a devilish smile on her lips. “You find a room and fuck that fine piece of man meat.” She raises her hand and slaps her knee. “And that will do it. No words need to be spoken, except for the ones telling him your coming.” I widen my eyes at her language then laugh because hers is infectious.

  We get our giggles under control, and I fumble with the card again, fighting back the tears that burn the back of my eyes.

  “Now, now, sugar, don’t go and start crying.” I feel Claire pat my leg. “Listen to an old woman.” I push my fingers into my eyes to stop them from turning on the waterworks before looking at her. “Sweetheart, you two are just lost in the dark, that’s all. The light will come on and there you’ll both be.” She smiles at me, confident in the words she’s just left me with. She turns around and goes back to work.

  In the afternoon, we say our goodbyes and I head home, turning right at the red light instead of left where I know he is. Where my mind tells me is not where I need to be, but it forgot to get my heart’s vote on that decision.

  I figured out real quick that I needed to get back to work, to occupy my mind with something other than worrying about what Matthew was doing. It had helped a little, but it hadn’t completely erased the fear that he’d moved on, making me a distant memory.

  The deep rumble of pipes from a motorcycle comes up behind me at the light, and my heart actually skips a beat. But when I look back, it isn’t him. It is, however, a rather large man in aviators. He’s shirtless, but his big muscular torso is covered with a black leather vest like Matthew’s, his thick black hair covered with a half helmet. He revs the engine and my eyes dart forward to see the light has changed. I gas my car and go under the lights, watching the bike turn from behind me.

  It can’t be possible that in the short time Matthew and I’d spent together, I could be so hung up on him. After all, I’m the one who called it off. But I had, and with each passing day, it seems I fall harder.

  The heart isn’t a rational organ like the brain. It just knows what it wants, and mine wants nothing more than to be near him and have him love me the way I’m starting to realize I love him.

  In the time we’ve been apart, each day I feel like a bigger fool than I had the day before, for the reasons we’re no longer together. My actions, or better yet, my reaction being the cause. That’s the main reason why I’ve fought everything in me to go to him, other reasons not withstanding.

  I pull off to the side of the road and put my car in park. Thanks to Matthew, it runs like a brand new one. I scoff. My whole fucking life runs like a new one because of what Matthew has done for me. I owe him so much more than a thank you and an apology written in a generic card, but all I have to give him is my heart. A cheap, useless organ that can be broken just as easily as a delicate glass vase.

  I wipe the tears from my cheeks as I pull back onto the road and head home.

  ~~~~~~

  Matt

  I stood to the side of the garage and watched her sit in her car, just down the way from the compound that day. I couldn’t go to the courthouse, but damned it was hard not to. I wanted to see her face when she found out she’d been granted her divorce, but I needed it to be about her and not something else I’d stepped in to make happen.

  I’ve never wanted a woman so fucking bad in my life, the way I want Tessa, and my friend Jack isn’t helping me find my way out of this hole I’ve dug for myself. So I watch her from afar. I’ve not talked or heard from her in the past eleven days. I do know she started back to work on Monday, and Claire keeps me up-to-date. Shitty, I know, but she’s become my obsession. I can’t let a day go by without hearing some little thing about her.

  I sit at the bar in the clubhouse, and for the first time in a long time, we’re having an adult night. By no means has not having Tessa around derailed my duties being a father to my little man, but tonight we are all kid-free. Thanks to Ima and Hugh, two brave souls that have taken all three of them on for the night.

  “Shots!” Piper screams, jerking me back from my thoughts of Tessa.

  “What the fuck is it with you and shots, woman? It’s a marathon, not a damned sprint,” I say to her as I slide off the stool, and retrieve myself another beer.

  “I like ‘em,” she says, as she pours us all one, her eyes a crazy blue tonight. Three of us with kids has cut down on our parties around the clubhouse, so when we get the chance, Piper takes it as a balls-to-the-wall, binge-drinking contest.

  “I’ll have a beer,” Leo says, as he sits down beside me, looking more tired than usual.

  We tap the necks of our bottles, and I nod to him. “You’re looking a little bit the worse for wear, brother.”

  “Gia’s teething.” He takes a drink. “She’s either shittin’ or screamin’.” He shakes his head. “Just like a woman, not being able to make her mind up.”

  “It ain’t just with the females, I remember when Jax was cutting teeth. I’m not sure which is better, that stuff or getting bit by the sharpest-ass little teeth on the planet every ten seconds.”

  Cowboy comes up next to us. “You don’t remember Caden doing that shit? I have a permanent scar on my left calf where she thought I was a chew toy. Couldn’t wear shorts around her for like a year.” He absentmindedly rubs his left leg. Leo gives Cowboy a look. “Oh, that’s right, you scared the shit out her.” He looks around Leo to me. “She wouldn’t have a damned thing to do with him.”

  I smile. “I don’t see why. He’s so fucking pleasant.”

  Eno walks behind the bar wrapping his arm around Piper’s shoulders from behind, tucking her into his chest. The rest of the girls join us at the bar, taking the shots Piper just poured. They toast each other before throwing the liquid back, each wincing as the liquor burns going down.

  Avery stumbles and begins to giggle, making Leo groan. “Shit—I kinda wanted to get laid tonight.”

  Eno moves quickly to straighten the drunk woman. When she has her footing again, Avery zeros her eyes in on him, closing one to focus. “Oh, don’t worry big boy, you’re gonna get laid.” Her words are slurred as she points her index finger at him.

  “Yeah, sexy, you’re gonna lie on my chest passed out.” Leo huffs, taking another drink from his beer as he rolls his eyes. “Trading one puking girl for another, shit.” He tosses his empty at the trash can at the end of the bar, the bottle making a loud clanking noise when it hits the others already in there.

  “Music,” Emily exclaims, once she’s got her drink down. She runs to the stereo system, turning it on. The others follow, and they begin to bicker over what to listen to.

  I feel a heavy head land on my shoulder, and turn to find the top of Avery’s head. She drunkenly wraps her arms around me. “I’m so sorry about Tessa. It’s a damned shame.” She takes in a deep breath and sighs it out. “I’ve tried to get ahold of her, but no luck. I’m worried.” This piques my interest. Taking her by the arm, I pull her to stand in front of me and look her in the eye.

  “Worried? Why?” she has me more than worried now, we’d had a tail on her the whole time she has been staying with her mother and not once have they reported back anything out of the ordinary.

  “Because you know she showed up at the ER that Tuesday morning,” she says, talking with her hands. She sways a little, making me tighten my hold on her. The great thing about a drunk Avery is, she over shares. Most of the time I don’t want to hear what she is divulging, but this has my attention. “And…” She takes in another deep breath. “She was worried about that whole broken condom thing.”

  My body tenses. “What broken condom thing?” She drifts off, and I give her a shake to bring her back. “What broken condom thing, Av
ery?”

  She gives me a slow, awkward smile. “Evidently your dick is too big—” She’s interrupted by Leo, who groans.

  “Damn, Avery, what the hell are you talking about Matt’s dick for?” I look over at him and smile, shrugging my shoulders.

  Her head snaps around to Leo, widening her eyes as she focuses on him. “His dick is too big for condoms, and Tessa said he got jizz all up inside her.” She kinda giggles, but Leo groans again.

  A sinking feeling comes over me. “What did she want from you?”

  She holds up her right hand using her index finger and thumb. “That little pill.”

  “Birth control?” If that’s the case—if she wasn’t already on it—it might’ve been too little, too late for that.

  She waves her hand like she was batting my question out of the air. “No, the other kind.”

  I turn to Leo. “What other kind of fucking pill does a girl take?” Feeling truly clueless, I never bothered to learn how women prevented pregnancy, I just always made sure I was wrapped, but it seems that didn’t even work for me.

  I watch as realization hits Leo. He sits straight on his stool, looking over at his woman. “Fuck, Avery, why didn’t you say something sooner?”

  “She asked me not to.” She holds her hands up to her sides and shrugs one of her shoulders.

  “What other kind of fucking pill is there?” I scream at the both of them.

  Leo sighs. “The morning-after pill, man.”

  A panic comes over me, and I get in Avery’s face, garnering her full attention. “Did she take it?”

  She slowly shrugs again. “I don’t know, she never came back. Told me she was, but she didn’t. That’s why I’ve been trying to get a hold of her.” She slides around me to step between Leos parted knees, where she leans back against his chest. She lets her head fall back and closes her eyes. “She needs a checkup, regardless of what she did,” she says before falling silent.

  It’s like the air has been completely sucked out of the room, and my lungs burn for the breath that was just knocked out of them. I straighten up, set my bottle on the bar, and look to Leo. He and I both sit in stunned silence, with the rest of the room still oblivious to the chaos going on inside me. I don’t know how to process this information, or what to do about it.