Red Hood's Revenge

by Jim C. Hines

  “I see it.” Danielle released Talia’s wrist, landing with a splash. Squishing footsteps followed.

  Talia glanced around, but most people avoided these streets, especially at midday when the heat baked the sewers, filling the back alleys with scents even fairy magic couldn’t suppress. Talia took Snow’s wrist. “You’re always saying you want to learn more about magic. Don’t you want to see how the fairies built this place?”

  “Some things I can learn from books.”

  Talia lowered Snow into the sewer. This time Danielle was able to help Snow from below, preventing any unnecessary splashing.

  Roudette was next, and then Talia grabbed the edge of the hole and swung in. Her feet kicked the far wall. She steadied herself, then dropped, legs going wide to catch the narrow walkways on either side of the sewer.

  “We need to pull the grate back into place.” Talia grimaced and stepped into the flowing muck. Her sandals sank into what felt like a muddy stream, though mud had never smelled so foul. She laced her fingers together. “Roudette?”

  Roudette put one foot in Talia’s hands and the other on her shoulder. Talia fought for balance as Roudette reached up through the hole. The grate slammed into place, showering them with grit and sand. Roudette jumped back down, splashing them all and earning a curse from Snow.

  The only light came from overhead, illuminating a thin slice of the tunnel. Dried mud and worse caked the lower part of the walls. The floor was sunken like an oversized gutter, with narrow ledges on either side. Talia stepped back onto a ledge and dipped a foot into the water, trying to rinse the worst of the slime away, but it was a losing battle.

  Snow’s choker brightened, the mirrors like tiny moons. Talia almost preferred the darkness. Patches of yellowed foam covered the water like fungus, broken only by unidentifiable lumps floating past.

  “This way,” said Talia. Within a few steps, the sounds from the surface quieted until she could hear nothing but her own breathing and the trickle of the water flowing past.

  Roudette sniffed the air. “We’re not alone down here.”

  “How can you smell anything?” Snow shuddered.

  “Sewer goblins.” Talia kept walking. “Most cities have an entire tribe. The goblins hunt rats and other vermin and keep the sewers from backing up. In exchange for this service, they get to keep whatever treasures might fall through the grates. They’re unpleasant creatures, and very territorial, but I’m told they have an artistic side. One of the merchants yesterday was selling goblin-made sculptures.”

  “Made out of what?” Snow asked.

  “You don’t want to know.”

  Danielle wrinkled her nose. “Are they dangerous?”

  “Individually, no.” Talia paused, head cocked as she tried to shut out the sounds of her companions. The sewer lines split off like tree branches grown wild, spreading out to follow every street in Jahrasima. Those splits were the most likely points for an ambush. “Even you would be more than a match for a single sewer goblin.”

  “Thanks,” Danielle said dryly.

  “The real danger comes after the fight,” Talia said. “Take a single scratch down here, and it’s likely to turn septic. If you don’t get to the sisterhood fast, you could end up losing a limb. The goblins also have the advantage of knowing these sewers better than anyone. Probably even better than the elementals who built them.”

  Talia drew a dagger. The sewers were too cramped for swords. The splash of water marked where two tunnels merged up ahead. She studied the darkness, searching for the telltale gold reflections of goblin eyes. The brighter light from Snow’s choker would help her spot them, but it would also be a beacon to the goblins.

  “Can’t we talk to them?” Danielle asked. “We’re the ones invading their homes.”

  “Exactly,” said Talia. “They believe anything in the sewers belongs to them. Including us. Fortunately, they’re cowards. They’ll attack a lone target, but an armed group should send them running. Probably.”

  Roudette readied her hammer as an animal scream filled the tunnel. The cries of sewer goblins reminded Talia a little of cats in heat. Another scream answered far behind them.

  “This place just keeps getting better,” said Snow.

  Talia hurried forward, but the goblin was gone by the time she reached the other tunnel. Fading splashes marked its retreat. Talia kept walking until she reached a square column of sunlight that marked another grate. She listened for a moment, trying to make sure she hadn’t lost her bearings. Dark stains marked the walls, random lines and smears with no meaning to anyone except the goblins who had drawn them.

  “At least they’re running away,” said Danielle.

  “Maybe.” Sewer goblins could move through the muck without a sound. The only reason to raise such a racket was to lure their prey after them. “Or else they’re running to fetch reinforcements.”

  The mansion was only a short distance away, but movement was slower in the cramped tunnels. The stones of the ledges were slick and occasionally loose. One gave way beneath Talia’s foot, splashing into the water. Without her gifts, she could have easily broken an ankle.

  “Stay in the middle of the tunnel,” Talia said, splashing forward. She wouldn’t put it past the goblins to have loosened certain stones deliberately as traps. She paused at another junction, hesitating only a moment before choosing the upstream tunnel. The water flowed more strongly here, meaning she was getting closer to the raikh’s personal reservoir.

  Roudette’s hammer scraped the wall as she turned. “More of them coming up behind us. This place is worse than the Fairy Queen’s labyrinth.”

  The water was higher here but also cleaner, the smell of human waste less overpowering. Sewer goblins continued to cry out, the sounds echoing all around them. More importantly, their screams blocked out the more subtle noises of their fellow goblins sneaking up the tunnels.

  “Should we remind them we’re armed?” Snow asked. “Someone once told me that should be enough to send them running.”

  “There are more than I remember.” Talia peeked around another bend in the tunnel. “They’ve never been this bold before.”

  Roudette turned around and roared, the sound so unexpected Talia nearly planted a knife in her throat. It was enough to scare the goblins into silence.

  “Don’t do that again.” Talia pressed herself against the wall. Up ahead, she heard a faint dripping sound, almost like rain. “The whole point of taking the sewers was to sneak in. The goblins are bad enough, but their cries shouldn’t draw much attention. They shout and fuss every time they find something larger than a rat. But if anyone hears you, we’ll find ourselves climbing right into a group of Rajil’s guards.”

  She turned right, and the flow grew strong enough to wash most of the filth from her sandals. Beams of light from overhead marked another sewage grate, this one carved like a sun with nine wavy beams. That sun meant they had crossed beneath the wall and were within the boundaries of the raikh’s home. “We’re close.”

  The goblins still hadn’t made a sound. Either Roudette had cowed them into silence, or else they had finished moving into position for their ambush. A sprinkling sound like a light rain came from directly ahead. That would be the reservoir.

  Talia crept forward. The tunnel grew tighter, the ceiling lowering until she had to crouch. The archway into the reservoir was little more than a window, with water flowing into the tunnel as though pouring over a miniature waterfall. Roudette and her cape would be a tight fit.

  Talia reached back to snag Snow, dragging her to the archway until her choker’s light shone into the reservoir. Beyond was a wide, round cavern, filled with water. Were Talia to float on her back, she would be able to touch the cave roof without straightening her arm. Water dripped from thousands of tiny stalactites, like stone icicles covering the roof. There was no way to guess how far down the water went, though most of the reservoirs were at least twice as deep as the average home.

  As she watched, a
single goblin floated into view on the far side of the archway, clutching what might charitably be called a raft. Bits of wood and cloth were all snarled together, floating just well enough to keep the goblin’s head above water as he clung to it. Talia made out a pale, wrinkled face with oversized pointed ears. Gold eyes glinted in the light.

  “Where are the rest?” Snow asked.

  Talia pointed, indicating the areas to either side of the window. One goblin to lure them in, while the rest waited in ambush.

  Danielle readied her sword, holding it like a short staff. One hand gripped the hilt; the other clutched the blade a short distance from the tip. The enchanted glass wouldn’t harm her, but using her sword that way should allow her to defend herself here in the cramped tunnels. Talia nodded her approval.

  “We should find another way,” said Danielle. “I don’t want to fight if we don’t have to.”

  Roudette merely grunted, but her expression made it clear what she thought of such an attitude.

  The raft bobbed as the goblin shifted position. One skinny arm drew back. Talia shoved Danielle to the side as the goblin skimmed a flat stone along the surface of the water. The stone bounced twice and shot past, clattering against the wall.

  “There is no other way,” Talia said, dodging a second stone. This one struck Roudette on the shoulder, though her cape seemed to absorb the blow. Roudette flexed her arm and bared her teeth.

  The goblin hooted, sounding more like an animal than an intelligent creature. As if this were a signal, the rest soon picked up the cry, until the laughter of a hundred goblins filled the sewers.

  Talia wiped her face with the back of her hand. She glanced back down the tunnel, wondering how many goblins lurked behind in the darkness, waiting to flank them.

  Danielle appeared to be thinking the same thing. “We can fight our way back through one of the tunnels until we reach another sewer grate. Maybe then—”

  Talia pushed past Danielle, using her knife to deflect another stone. The impact jarred her wrist and chipped the edge of her blade. This one had come from behind. “Snow, give me one of your mirrors. Danielle, take the others into that side tunnel. Kill anything you find, then have Snow extinguish her light. I’ll lead the rest of the goblins away. That should clear the reservoir. Once they follow, get up through the well and wait for me. If I don’t return by—”

  “No.” All three women spoke at once, but to Talia’s surprise, it was Roudette who was loudest. Roudette used her hammer to block another stone. She grinned. “If they wish to fight, who are we to argue? Goblins are cowards. Slaughter a handful, and the rest will flee.”

  Talia nodded. To Danielle, she said, “Roudette and I will go in first. If something happens, you and Snow get inside. The well will be capped, so you’ll need to break through.” She lowered her voice. “No matter what else happens, promise me you’ll get Faziya out of there.”

  “Of course,” said Danielle.

  “Thank you.”

  Snow stared at her. “You care for her, don’t you?” Her voice was strangely soft, almost childlike.

  Talia couldn’t meet her eyes. “Just be ready.” She glanced at Roudette, who raised her hammer. But before they could charge into the reservoir, Snow touched their shoulders, pulling them away.

  “Would you mind guarding my back?” Snow moved toward the archway.

  “What are you doing?” asked Danielle.

  “These two barbarians did pretty well against that hunter last night.” Snow smiled. “I think it’s time to remind them what a sorceress can do.”

  CHAPTER 13

  SNOW STRETCHED A HAND INTO THE water spilling through the archway. It was cool and clean, carrying the tiniest hint of residual magic from the various enchantments that kept the wells and sewers flowing.

  “This is wasting time,” Roudette said.

  Snow shook her head. “You’re as bad as Talia. No subtlety at all. It’s all fighting and stabbing and killing. Where’s the artistry in that?”

  “I’ll show you some time.”

  Snow did her best to concentrate. Her pulse pounded in her skull, a precursor of the pain to come if she pushed too hard.

  Fog rose from her fingers where the water passed over her skin. Tiny crystals of ice formed around her fingertips. At first the ice broke and washed away, but soon the crystals grew larger, touching the stones of the wall and spreading upward.

  Goose bumps raced along Snow’s arm. The rest of her body was sweating. Siphoning the heat from so much water could kill her if she wasn’t careful.

  “Goblins aren’t known for their patience, Snow,” Talia said.

  “Then you and they have something in common.” Snow pressed her other hand to the water, pouring more magic into her spell and using her mirrors to try to dissipate some of the excess heat. The ice crept upward, creating a dam across the archway. The trickling of the water died. She flinched as another rock cracked against the wall. “Would you mind?”

  Talia crouched, searching the water with one hand until she found one of the rocks. She sent it hurtling back down the tunnel. A goblin squealed in the darkness.

  Perspiration dripped from Snow’s forehead, tickling her cheeks as it fell. The ice cracked and refroze as it spread into the reservoir. The sound reminded her of damp firewood popping in the flames. Goblin howls changed to cries of shock, and Snow smiled.

  The mice in her pouch chose that moment to squirm and struggle, making Snow jump. “Quiet in there,” she said.

  The crackling grew louder. The ice had reached the goblin’s raft now, freezing it into place. The goblin’s eyes widened. He reached out to scratch the ice with his claws. With a frightened squeal, he pulled himself onto the ice and tried to crawl away. He kept yanking his hands up as the cold tried to freeze his wet body to the surface.

  “They live in the desert,” Snow said smugly. “They’ve probably never seen ice before.”

  Panicked shouts and splashing signaled the goblins’ retreat. The one from the raft scrambled across the ice, trying to catch up with the others. His hands and legs kept sliding out from under him until he finally flipped onto his back and grabbed the ceiling to pull himself along.

  Snow broke her hands free of the ice. She couldn’t feel her fingers, and her nails had a bluish tinge. She grabbed the side of the archway, but between the frost on the stones and her own dizziness, she nearly fell. Talia caught her arms and held her steady.

  “What about the ones behind us?” Danielle asked.

  Roudette snorted. “Frightened off by the screams of their companions. Cowards, as I said.” She almost sounded disappointed.

  “Wait here.” Talia peeked through the archway. She grabbed the edges and pulled herself up. Snow could still hear two goblins screaming from within the reservoir. Those goblins’ screams grew shriller as Talia moved onto the ice.

  With Danielle’s help, Snow followed Talia into the reservoir. There she found two goblins trapped in the ice. The closer goblin had only a single arm free. His claws dug long gouges as he tried to free himself. The other was worse off. She must have grabbed the edge of the ice, trying to push it back with her bare hands. As the ice spread, it froze her hands in place, leaving only her fingers protruding like tiny wrinkled toadstools. Her hair was locked in the ice, holding her head back.

  The ice left barely enough room to crawl. Snow rolled onto her side against the wall and held her hands to her choker, using the still-warm mirrors to try to thaw her flesh.

  Danielle was next through, followed by Roudette. Roudette crawled straight toward the closest goblin, her hammer scraping along the ice.

  “No,” Danielle said. “They’re helpless.”

  “They would have killed and eaten you without a thought!”

  “We came into their home.” Danielle pushed herself between Roudette and the goblin.

  Roudette stared at her, then turned to face Talia and Snow. “Is she always like this?”

  “Pretty much,” said Talia. “You
get used to it eventually.”

  Roudette scooted to one side on her hands and knees, trying to circle past Danielle. “Those filthy creatures are of fairy blood! They—”

  “Danielle’s right,” said Talia. “Leave them. Arathean goblins are little more than animals. A bit like yourself in that regard. They’re not working for Zestan. They barely even know how to speak.”

  Snow left them to their squabbling. She flexed her hands, gritting her teeth at the resultant pain that burned through her fingers. That pain meant she probably hadn’t done any permanent damage. She crawled toward the center of the reservoir, stopping when the ice grew too thin to support her. A quick punch broke a hole through the ice, and she peered down into the water. The reservoir was surprisingly deep. The bottom shone like silver, reflecting the light from her choker.

  It was also warm. Snow plunged her hands in, gasping as the water further thawed her fingers. Once she could feel her hands again, she slid into the water and swam toward the round shadow in the ceiling that marked the bottom of what she assumed to be the raikh’s well. The magic of the reservoir swept the filth from her clothes, washing it in a single foul current toward one of the many openings in the walls. One of the sewer tunnels, no doubt.

  She wished she had more time to study the magic. Public wells meant anyone could poison the raikh’s water supply. The fairy magic not only cleansed the water, it probably purified any toxins. That would be a useful spell to learn, not to mention it would help her to understand how fairy magic worked in this land.

  She held her breath and ducked beneath the surface, rinsing her face and hair. By the time she surfaced, the others were joining her in the water, leaving the squealing goblins trapped in the ice. Talia dove deep, shooting up a moment later like a mermaid to catch the stones at the base of the well. Her feet kicked as she pulled herself higher. A short time later, Snow could hear the rattle of metal from the top of the well.

  “What’s wrong?” Danielle asked.

  Talia dropped out of the well, hitting the water with hardly a splash. She surfaced and shoved her hair back from her face. “They’ve latched it. Most people don’t bother, since the goblins aren’t strong enough to climb up. It’s probably a simple metal catch, but the lip of the well keeps me from reaching it.”