Reckless Heart

by Barbara McMahon

  Her head nodded.

  She opened her eyes. She had to get to sleep if she was to get up early enough to prepare breakfast. With a sigh, she turned off the computer. Two days and not a single new word written. She might have underestimated how much time it would take to finish the book.

  Molly felt as if her head had barely touched the pillow when loud, rapid knocking on her door woke her from a deep sleep. Sitting upright in surprise, she realized dawn was still a half hour away.

  “Molly, dammit, wake up!” Josh pounded on her door and called her name. Was there a fire?

  She scrambled from the bed and ran to the door, flinging it open. Blinking in the bright hall light, she peered up at him.

  “What’s wrong?”

  He slowly lowered his still-raised hand as he took in her appearance. Her hair, tousled and disheveled from sleeping, swirled around her face like a soft brown cloud. A sleep crease from her sheet slashed across her cheek. Her eyes were half closed against the light. And she wore a pale blue, skimpy satiny sleep shirt that draped over her, hugging her curves and valleys.

  Josh felt a burst of desire unexpected and hard. He stepped closer, skimming the back of his fingers down her flushed, warm cheek.

  “Is there a fire?” she asked, shaking her head to come awake.

  “No fire.”

  His gaze traveled down to her pink polished toes. Her legs were bare, tanned, shapely. The sleep shirt, stopping at the midpoint of her thighs, almost fell off one shoulder.

  “Josh?” Molly took in his attire. He wore only a terry robe. At least she thought that was all he wore. She could see his bronzed chest in the deep vee of the short robe; his muscular legs were bare. Why was he here? Why had he banged on her door like there was an emergency?

  He leaned over and kissed her. Startled, Molly slipped her hands up to his shoulders to keep her balance. Then it seemed logical to encircle his neck, thread her fingers through his damp hair. His face was clean-shaven, no scratchy beard against her skin.

  Wait. Damp hair, shaved?

  Somewhere it registered that he'd already had his shower and probably wore nothing beneath his robe.

  As she wore nothing beneath her shirt.

  “Molly.” He pulled back, breathing hard. “Where are my clothes?”

  “What?”

  She snapped open her eyes and stared at him. “What do you mean, where are your clothes? In your—oh no!”

  Whirling, she raced down the stairs and into the kitchen, flicking on the lights as she made her way through the house heading for the laundry room. Oh no, oh no oh no, she chanted, flinging up the lid to the washer. There in damp array sat his jeans and dark shirts. The pile of colored shirts were still on the floor next to the washer. Whites piled next to them.

  She'd forgotten to put the jeans in the dryer yesterday! On the floor before the washer sat the other loads of clothes, all waiting to be washed.

  “Damn!” Josh had followed her and stood in the doorway, his gaze immediately recognizing the situation.

  “I can dry them right away.” She pulled the heavy damp denims from the washer and stuffed them into the dryer.

  “Denim takes forever to dry.”

  “Nonsense, they’ll be dry by the time you finish breakfast,” she said, crossing her fingers as she hit the On button. Putting soap into the washer, she scooped up another load and started that, as well.

  “If you think I’m going to breakfast dressed like this, you’re crazy,” he said.

  She looked at him and her heart melted. Her knees grew weak again and she held on to the washer like a lifeline.

  He looked like he just got up from bed. His hair was mussed from her own hands. His eyes glittered at her and in the uncertain light, it looked like he wanted her. Which just proved her imagination worked even first thing in the morning.

  She pushed away.

  “I’m sorry. I guess I was so caught up in cleaning, I forgot to change the loads. I’ll make sure they are all done today.”

  “Can you keep your mind on it?” he asked with an edge in his tone.

  “Yes.”

  He had a right to be angry. It took less than twenty seconds to load the dryer and push the button. Why hadn’t she thought once about the clothes after she'd gathered them from his room?

  Maybe that kiss had had something to do with forgetting everything.

  It would have been so easy if she’d put the clothes in to dry before going to bed.

  She should have remembered!

  “You’ll excuse me for wondering. How could you forget something so simple?” he asked.

  “I just did, okay? It won’t happen again.”

  “I’m putting my money on that it will happen again. Molly, you’re one strange woman. You go off into your own little world so far the house could burn down around you and I don’t think you’d notice.”

  “So this housekeeper might be the one that just wandered away in her mind?” she joked, trying to ease the tension that shimmered between them.

  “No, sweetheart, this one might be the one I fire,” he said slowly.

  “Please don’t, Josh. I’ll do better, I promise. It’s just my way of coping.”

  “Coping with what?”

  “My dad. He...nothing I did ever pleases him. He wants me to be accomplished like my mother. She left him when I was little. Left us both. So I don't even have a role model. He’s a hard man, expects perfection. So I’d imagine I did things his way. That he liked what I did.”

  Loved me, she wanted to say, but stopped short before revealing that.

  “And imagined a lot of other things to make life more bearable?” he asked with pinpoint accuracy.

  She nodded. “But things are different here. I’m doing a good job. I know I’ve messed up a little—”

  He laughed. “You’ve messed up more than anyone I’ve ever known. I’d hate to see your definition of messing up a lot!”

  “But I’m getting better. I know now to fix tons of food. I won’t put sugar in the potatoes again. I’ll use the timer so I don’t burn things. I’ve already cleaned the living room and hall. And I’ll finish up the rest of the house before you know it.”

  “You're here temporarily, Molly. I told you that from the first, so don’t get settled in too much.”

  “I know.”

  Once she sold her book, it wouldn’t matter. She could live wherever she wanted. And write full time.

  Still, it hurt just a little that he kept reminding her the assignment was only temporary.

  “I’ll be in the office. Bring my breakfast there,” he said. Glancing down the length of her, he met her eyes. “And I suggest you change before starting breakfast or you’ll have a dozen cowboys over you like flies on honey.”

  “Only a dozen?” she asked provocatively. Was he immune to her? Even after kissing her? Or was it because he’d kissed her and found her lacking?

  He reached out and rubbed the pad of his thumb gently over her lower lip. “I think Jack’s immune, too old. And a couple of the men have girlfriends. That leaves the rest of us.”

  She trembled at his touch, at his words. He’d included himself in the group of cowboys. It warmed her heart like nothing ever had.

  “What a kind man you are,” she said.

  “Kind?”

  “To say such a nice thing. I’ve never had anyone hint I could be some kind of femme fatale.”

  Josh groaned and pulled her into his arms. “What do you think these kisses have been about?” he asked as his mouth closed over hers again.

  She drove him crazy. As provocative as hell and she didn’t even have the slightest clue. As innocent as a babe, which enchanted him and confused him. He didn’t want to feel anything for her. He wanted her gone.

  But not just yet. His tongue tasted her sweetness, his chest savored the feel of her soft breasts pressed against him. His arms cherished the rounded body that so trustingly leaned into him. If he weren’t careful, he’d want more from her t
han anyone had ever given, including Jeannie.

  At the thought of his former fiancée, Josh’s ardor dimmed.

  He raised his head.

  Molly opened her eyes and stared up at him, the wonder clearly evident. He felt ten feet tall and wary as hell.

  “Change your clothes,” he said.

  Releasing her, he tightened the belt on his robe and headed for the office. He wasn’t about to fall for some starry-eyed romantic. He had his priorities, the ranch first and everything else a distant second.

  Time he called the employment agency again and hurry them up on the replacement housekeeper.

  Molly prepared breakfast in a daze. She couldn’t believe Josh had kissed her this morning—twice. She didn’t understand it.

  She felt as if she were in over her head. She hated to disappoint him, but she’d reached the limit of her experience. She hadn’t a clue how to progress. Even if he wanted to progress.

  And by the way he pulled away, she doubted it.

  By mid morning, Molly had a grocery list that didn’t end. She could have called it in like she'd done the previous one. But she wanted some time away from the ranch, and to get to know the store better, see what other things she might wish to buy for meals.

  She headed for the yard, wondering who would teach her how to drive one of the pickup trucks or if she needed anyone. Josh had said he would, but she didn’t want to be confined in the cab of a truck with him. Her mind kicked into overdrive anytime she came near him. How could she concentrate on driving techniques if she wondered every second whether he’d kiss her again?

  The only truck available was the big blue and white one nosed up against the barn. She crossed the yard and opened the door. The keys were in the ignition. Climbing up into the cab, she slammed the door and took stock. How hard would it be? A bit different from a car, he’d said. But everything looked the same. She adjusted the seat. Josh or Lance must have driven it last, the seat was so far back. Fiddling with the mirror, she took a deep breath and started the engine.

  No one came to see who had started the truck. In fact, she hadn’t seen hide nor hair of anyone since Josh passed through the house sometime after breakfast, fully dressed in his dry clothes. Which reminded her, she hadn’t put that second wash load in the dryer. Slowly she reversed the truck until she stopped by the back door. Putting it into park, she dashed inside to pull the dry clothes from the dryer and pile them on top, throw the clothes in the dryer, start the last wash load.

  In only moments she turned onto the highway that led to Cheyenne, pleased she had managed on her own and forgotten nothing. Her confidence soared.

  By the end of the week, Molly felt much more secure in her position. She'd mastered shopping, meal planning, and even cooking. Only once during the week had she burned anything and she had hidden the evidence before the men discovered it. Though a couple of them sniffed the air suspiciously.

  The house shone. She’d cleaned everything from top to bottom, including Josh’s bedroom. Laundry still proved a challenge to remember to put wet clothes in the dryer, but she made it a habit to wander into the laundry room just after mealtime.

  But her book had suffered. Too tired at night to do anything but fall into bed, she hadn't written anything.

  Determined to get busy on the novel, she hurried through her chores Friday morning, giving the house a lick and a promise. Since everything had been cleaned in the last couple of days, there was little to do. She made a huge pot of stew, set it on the stove to simmer slowly, and wiped up after lunch.

  The afternoon loomed free and she planned to take full advantage of it.

  For the first time since she arrived, she wanted to go outside and discover what she could about the ranch.

  Strolling to the barn, Molly avidly took in everything her eyes spotted. The few horses in the corral dozed in the early afternoon sun, one back leg bent, resting on the tip of a hoof, heads lowered, eyes closed.

  The blue and white pickup she’d driven to the store was parked nose in by the gray barn. She smiled as she remembered how proud she’d felt the other day when she reached home without mishap. And the long assessing look Josh had given her when he found out she’d taken the truck and done enough shopping to last a couple of weeks.

  The wide double doors of the barn stood open and the cavernous interior looked dark and mysterious compared to the bright sunshine. The scent of hay and horses mingled in the breeze. It was hushed, no voices murmured in the background. Most of the men were out on the range somewhere. Doing tallies, she remembered. Only four had been in for lunch.

  She paused in the doorway to let her eyes adjust to the dimmer light. The hayloft ran the length of the barn on both sides, open in the middle. Bales of hay stacked up five high lined the walls. Loose hay drifted over the edge when the breeze gusted. The stalls were empty. The door to the tack room stood open and Molly headed for it.

  Jack leaned back in a chair, rubbing saddle soap into a set of reins. He glanced up when she stepped inside.

  “Hi. I’m taking a walk,” Molly said brightly.

  “Howdy. Set a spell. Finally wanting out of the house?”

  “Yes. I’ve caught up on all the work that needs doing right away. I thought I’d find out more about the ranch.”

  “Any questions, ask away.”

  Molly glanced around. Jack had the only chair and she wouldn’t ask him to give it up. She took a blanket from a hook on the wall and folded it on the floor, sinking down so she could watch Jack work as he talked.

  A million questions bubbled up. Some from her own curiosity, others slanted to the new idea she had for her book. Jack answered them all patiently, expanding when she requested, explaining terms to her, making sense at last to some of the conversations she’d heard at dinner.

  When a horse rode into the yard, Molly wondered if it might be Josh. She hadn’t seen him since breakfast. He’d been one of the men out doing tallies, so he hadn’t come in for lunch.

  Her hands grew damp with nerves when she thought it might be him. He'd maintained his distance since that morning he’d kissed her in the laundry room. But he hadn't had any reason to get angry with her since then.

  She’d done her job well and though he watched her during mealtime, he found no fault. While she was pleased she was beginning to measure up, she lived in hope he’d kiss her one more time before she left.

  Chapter Six

  Lance appeared in the doorway.

  “Wondered who you were talking to,” he said to Jack, then smiled at Molly, one finger tipping back his hat.

  “Just answering some questions the little lady had. Her first time on a ranch, you know,” Jack said.

  “Come with me, I’ll give you some pointers,” Lance invited.

  Molly scrambled up and rehung the blanket. “Thank you, Jack. Hope I didn’t drive you crazy with all my questions.”

  “No, pleasure to talk about ranching. So many people aren’t interested in hearing an old man ramble on.”

  “You didn’t ramble, and I found it all fascinating,” she said with a sunny smile. Following Lance into the barn, she walked beside him as he led his horse to the rear. Fastening it in cross ties, he began to unsaddle his mount.

  “Where did you go today?” she asked, taking careful note of how he did everything. The horse seemed large, but didn’t bother Lance. He easily hefted the heavy saddle, dropping it on a stand nearby and turning to grin at Molly.

  “Out to one of the areas where we’ve got a lot of cattle. We’re taking a tally of how many are on that particular bit of range, checking to make sure we’ve lost none, or none are down and hurting. Or missing.”

  “Do you do that kind of thing a lot?”

  “Enough to insure the well-being of the herd.”

  “The Rafter C seems to be a very prosperous ranch,” she commented.

  “Very. One of the top ranches in this part of the country. When Jase ran the place, he got written up in a journal as a rancher to watch.”<
br />
  “How long ago was that?”

  “A few years now. Before I came here. Jase didn’t want a foreman, did all that kind of work himself.”

  “And where was Josh?”

  “At the university. When he graduated, he started working here as foreman, I guess you’d say.”

  “Then Jase left and Josh took over?”

  “Yep. Once their sister graduated from the university, Jase took off to ride the rodeo circuit. Josh hired me a few months later.”

  “And the ranch continues to be very prosperous,” she finished, feeling a certain vicarious pride in the work Josh did. His brother might have started things in the right direction, but it was Josh’s direction now that kept the ranch prosperous.

  “Very prosperous, but why do you care? Worried about your salary?” Josh’s voice sounded behind her.

  Molly turned, startled to find him standing so close. She hadn’t heard him come in. She saw his horse standing beyond the open doors. How much had he heard? And what interpretations did he put on her questions? Obviously the wrong ones.

  “I wasn’t worried about anything, just curious,” she said, flustered.

  His hat pulled low, his jeans were tight and dusty. Molly’s heart fluttered and she longed to sit somewhere and stare at him until she had her fill. But ever conscious of Lance standing there and Josh’s unfriendly stare, she looked away.

  “Now I wonder why?” Josh glanced at Lance, back to Molly. “What are you doing out here?”

  “I’m caught up on the housework and wanted to get out for some fresh air,” she said pertly, her eyes meeting his, her gaze challenging.

  “In the barn?” His tone disbelieving.

  “Molly wanted to know more about the ranch. Jack answered some of her questions. I was going to show her around,” Lance said easily, his gaze meeting Josh’s, his stance loose and at ease.

  Ignoring his foreman, Josh stared at Molly, his eyes narrowed. “I told you I’d answer any questions you had.”

  “You weren’t here. Lance and Jack were.”

  “I’m here now.”

  “I don’t mind, boss,” Lance interjected.