Last-Chance Marriage Rescue
Page 10
He drank in the sight. Had it really been years since they were little more than a pound each fighting for their lives in incubators? “They’ve grown up so fast. I know every parent says that, but I just didn’t know until I lived it.”
“We have plenty to be grateful for.” She toyed with the neckline of her sweater. “There were so many days I wasn’t sure even one of them would live, much less both of them.”
“Remember when we celebrated them graduating from a feeding tube to a bottle?” Even thinking about that day made him choke up, even a decade later. Those first weeks of their life had been filled with unrelenting fear, so strong even the memory of it squeezed the air from his lungs. Thank God, those days had passed and he would never have to return to that nightmare.
“Kelsey first, while our stubborn Kacie held out a while longer.” She smiled, her eyes sheened with tears.
“I worry sometimes that Kacie’s struggles in school trace back to those early days.” He scrubbed at the back of his neck.
She touched his knee lightly. “I didn’t know you worried about that. But if it’s an issue, we’ll do whatever we need to help her.”
Her touch seared through denim.
He cleared his throat. “I try to tell myself she’s happy excelling in her own interests, but it’s clear she’s hurt by Kelsey’s academic success.”
“Life isn’t fair or evenhanded.”
He nodded, his mind jumping to the past. “I see them in my sleep, so tiny with all those tubes running from their frail preemie bodies.”
A lump formed in his throat, remembering the sterile scent of the hospital. The panic that only came from knowing something was out of your hands. How could she even think of risking that again with another pregnancy?
Lines of panic drew Nina’s lips tighter. “I never thought it would be my only experience with childhood. I always imagined we would make happy, normal memories of leaving the hospital with our healthy seven-pound newborn—”
She stopped short, looking at him in panic and blinking fast against the sheen in her eyes.
He’d never considered how his decision to not to have more children could have had deeper repercussions for her. He’d stolen yet another dream from her without even knowing it. He’d been so focused on how their shared grief then had been—and still was—so powerful, so gut-wrenching.
If he could just make her understand where he was coming from, if he could just find the right words. Douglas cupped her shoulder, squeezing lightly. “Nina, I can see that you’re upset and that’s the—”
She shrugged off his hand, her body going tense in that way he knew meant she was struggling to hold on to control. Wrought iron scraping against the floor, she stood up from her seat in a start. “I, uh, need to talk to Hollie about what pastries the girls would like with their ice cream.”
As if the girls hadn’t been choosing their own food since they could point.
Watching his wife’s blond hair gather on her sweater as she made her way toward the countertop, he couldn’t dodge the uncomfortable truth that saying no to another baby had nothing to do with money, and everything to do with protecting his heart from any more loss.
Chapter Eight
Nina struggled to resist Douglas on a regular day. But seeing her husband go all vulnerable and emotional over memories of their daughters?
That threatened to steal every bit of her resolve at a time she was more than a little raw from revisiting those early days when they didn’t know if Kacie and Kelsey would survive. Douglas had been such a rock for her then, somehow she’d missed how the experience had gutted him, too.
Lordy, he was a complex man, and he had a way of getting to her even when they were surrounded by a roomful of people in the Bone Appétit Café. Standing at Hollie’s shop counter, Nina placed bite-size apple tarts onto the white-and-gold polka-dot serving tray. She breathed in vanilla, a scent she always associated with the holidays and laughter.
If only she could bottle up that mood and dispense accordingly. Nina could see Hollie’s stamp all over the place, from the white picket fence sectioning off a play area to the mural of dogs romping through the mountains painted on the walls. She had to admire the way Hollie O’Brien had managed to blend her culinary background with her husband’s animal husbandry training. Nina had never quite managed that balancing act. She’d been so intent on helping Douglas keep his family dream alive, she’d lost sight of her own.
Being here, with the world slowing down and her senses coming back to life, the artist inside her was ravenous to be fed after so long in hibernation. She ached to capture every vibrant image around her. Why did she have to tamp down all the parts of herself that Douglas had once claimed were what made him fall for her?
Hollie leaned into Nina’s line of sight. An easy smile played on her lips as she wiped her hand on her burlap apron covered in ice cream cones with pawprint-shaped ice cream. “Your husband appears to be a really good father.”
Because he was.
Nina handed over plates for pie. “You and Jacob make a cute couple. I admire how you make it seem so easy to work together.”
Hollie poured heavy cream into an aluminum bowl. Then dumped a heap of powdered sugar before adding a splash of vanilla. “Marriages are complicated. Business is easy.”
Nina sighed as images of the Archer farm danced through her mind’s eye. The first real home she’d ever had. Even when her parents were alive, they’d moved all the time. “Successful businesses are.”
“Well, I guess that helps.” Hollie set to stirring the mixture, metal beater clinking against the bowl as whipped cream for the pie began to form. “We’ve been looking at land to expand, but sometimes I worry that if we take on more, we won’t have any time for each other.”
“How long have you been married?” Her gaze gravitated to Douglas, who was patiently herding the girls as they chose toppings to add to the ice cream.
“We’ve been together for over two decades.” She leaned back against the counter, her eyes taking on a faraway look. “I was only sixteen when he walked into my daddy’s ice cream parlor. He placed his order and asked me out all in one breath.”
“That’s fast.”
“Oh, I said no.” Hollie winked. “And continued to say no when he came to the shop faithfully once a week to repeat the invitation.”
“How long did you hold out?”
“Four months and three weeks.” Hollie grabbed an extra spoon and swiped a bit of the whipped cream, offering a sample to Nina.
“That’s sure a long time. He never gave up?” Nina licked the spoon—and oh my God, that was the most divine whipped cream ever. Her taste buds cried out in bliss.
“Nope. He wasn’t pushy, either. Just charmingly persistent.” She toyed with the end of her braid. “Each week he would tell me a little something about himself and ask me something about myself. But it wasn’t the things he told me that won me over. It was seeing the way he treated other people when he thought I wasn’t looking.”
Nina couldn’t help but smile.
Hollie spooned dollops of cream on top of the slices of pie. “Like holding the door open for a gentleman with a cane. Tipping big to the waitress who needed it the most. Picking up a teddy bear off the floor to pass to an overwhelmed mom, and then shaking it to entertain the kid while the mother finished her milkshake in peace.”
“He sounds like a good man.” And she knew from stories from the kids in her foster home that good people weren’t just a given in life.
Hollie’s face lit with a faraway look full of the first blush of love. “I can still remember what he bought on that very first day—a double scoop of chocolate in a waffle cone. He’s always had a sweet tooth.”
“How romantic that now you have your own ice cream parlor.” A job she clearly loved.
“Well, it wasn’t totally smooth sailing
. He questioned my sanity when I said half the clientele would be animals.”
“Smart business having the clients buy food to feed the ranch animals.”
“The animals certainly gave the plan their blessing. They all gather round on pumpkin pup ice cream day.” She swept off her apron and replaced it with a clean one. “So how did you and your man meet?”
Her man? Was he? Not for much longer.
“I was in college studying photography.” So excited to be building a future for herself, determined never again to be dependent on anyone for anything. “During my wildlife photography class, we made a trip out to a local farm. They’d agreed to give us a tour of the spread and in return we would share our pictures with them. Day one, he led the tour, and I was hooked on photographing the outdoors. I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life.”
“You’ve been so generous in sharing your talent taking photos the past few days. I’d love to see some photos from your portfolio.”
“Thanks, but it’s woefully outdated. Kids. Life. Not that I regret them in any way. They are my most amazing accomplishment.”
Hollie’s eyebrows pinched together as she glanced at the kids, a smile flickering across her face, if not her eyes. “They’re certainly two of the most enthusiastic young guests we’ve ever had. What’s on your agenda for this evening?”
“The girls chose the drive-in movie.”
Hollie elbowed her lightly. “With luck, your daughters will drift off to sleep so you and your husband are free to make out.”
Nina’s eyes went wide and her stomach fell to her feet. It was just a drive-in, she reassured herself. Nothing had to happen. She could always say no.
So why was she already trying to figure out the best place to buy condoms?
* * *
Sitting in the back of his truck under the stars, Douglas stretched his legs on the quilt, his wife beside him for movie night. And what a shame there would be no necking. After their argument about birth control, it was clear he had more work to do in charming her before taking her to bed.
So he tamped down the need throbbing through his veins and focused on the moment, glad to be outside now that the rain had passed. A family-friendly movie about a dog’s trek to reunite with her owner was splashed across the makeshift screen—the side of a mountain with stone chiseled flat. Their daughters sat on the tailgate, legs swinging as they finished off the last of their popcorn.
The movie was entertaining, but he would much rather keep his eyes on his wife. Her hair was loose tonight, lifting ever so slightly in the wind. She made even jeans and a sweatshirt look like runway fashion with her knee-high leather boots and big gold hoop earrings. She was even more beautiful than the day they’d met.
They had traveled a lot of heartache since then.
Kacie held up her empty popcorn bucket. “Hey, can Kelsey and I get more snacks?”
Kelsey shifted onto her knees to face them. “Please? The stand is just over there.” She pointed to the flatbed trailer behind a tractor to the left of the movie “screen.”
“They’ve got hot cocoa with marshmallows,” Kacie added, “and those big fat pretzels with cheese.”
Nodding, Nina untangled a strand of hair from her earring. “Sure, just be sure to stay where we can see you.”
Their cheers echoing after them, they hopped off the back of the truck and darted past the van beside them, waving to the injured firefighter before sprinting off.
Douglas braced a hand on the truck bed, his palm flat just behind her, close enough that his arm was almost around her, but not so much to spook her. “The return of drive-in movies—at least something good came out of the pandemic.”
She tipped her face toward him, her long lashes sweeping upward, the moonlight sparkling in her eyes. “This place certainly has a way of making the most of the simple pleasures in life. A real back-to-basics approach.”
“They’re innovative, that’s for sure. My hat’s off to them for figuring out a way for their business to survive in a world that’s changing so much, so fast.” He wished he’d been able to do the same.
“Thank you for hanging in there with the soap making earlier.”
“It was important to you, which made it important to me.”
“I could tell it made you uncomfortable, talking about feelings with a bunch of strangers.”
The rose scent that the couple beside them had chosen for their soap reminded him of his mother. Before he knew it, he was talking to the whole group about the sound of her voice as she sang him to sleep, something he hadn’t even remembered until then.
“I wish I could blame it on being a guy, but I’m afraid it’s much deeper in my DNA. Tyler, on the other hand, was always able to label whatever he was feeling.” His brother could have led the whole soap-making class, spilling heart-tugging secrets left and right.
“Yes, he had a gift for that. Somehow that made it easier to process whatever emotions I was dealing with. I wasn’t the only one in the room weighted down by something. I wasn’t alone.”
He hated that he hadn’t been enough for her. That in many ways he still wasn’t. “Tyler was there for me.”
“And you were there for him.”
“There to see him die.” The words tasted bitter on his tongue.
“You know you did more than that.” She touched a hand to his leg lightly, her gentle hand warm through well-worn denim. “You made it possible for him to live out the last days of his life on the farm he loved.”
“With you and the girls there to make him smile.” His world would be so very barren without them. “I’m sorry you had to sacrifice so much for me.”
“Douglas,” she said softly, sliding her hand away. “We’re going to have to talk to the kids soon.”
“I know.”
From lowered lashes, awash in movie glow and starlight, she looked at him, a gaze that pierced to his core. “Do you? I feel like you’re delaying because it’s going to be hard.” Compassion shone from her eyes, no sign of judgment, nothing to spur a fight that would have given him an excuse to walk away.
He had no choice but to answer her or distract her. “Or maybe I don’t think we should have the conversation at all.”
Forget about keeping his distance.
He sealed his mouth to hers.
* * *
Douglas tasted like popcorn and lost dreams. Passion and broken promises.
He tasted like her husband.
So much so, it made it hard to acknowledge the embers of anger that crackled inside her over his incendiary comment about forgoing a conversation with the girls about divorcing. As if she wanted to have the talk? She hated that they’d come to this. Grieved over all they’d lost.
And after having given up so many dreams, she deserved this simple kiss, one that couldn’t go anywhere since they weren’t alone out here under the stars at the makeshift drive-in. Kissing. One of the married kinds of kisses that were their right to indulge in as a couple. Whatever he had to offer and everything she had to give. This wasn’t a time for thinking. Just feeling. Experiencing. Reveling in the warmth pulsing through her.
She’d missed him, missed what they shared. Their desire for each other had never been in question. She didn’t want to consider what it would be like to live without him, without this. Or how she would resist him at all the million times their paths would cross in the future.
Or what it would be like to see him with another woman someday.
The thought iced her, freezing out desire. She pulled back, palms pressing against his strong, chiseled chest. The feel of his muscles threated to draw her into the moment again. But she kept her resolve strong and inched across the truck bed. “I should go check to see what’s keeping the girls.”
He stared at her for moment, his eyes assessing, before he stopped her with a hand on her arm. “No ne
ed. I’ll go.”
She didn’t bother arguing. As long as she got her space. “Fine. Thank you.”
Dragging in a ragged breath, she fought to keep her face neutral. Memories and feelings had been loosed by the press of his lips. Promises of what life could be if there had been another path.
He didn’t even glance back as he jumped from the vehicle, his boots puffing dust as he landed. He made fast tracks past the firefighter couple on his way toward the girls, their blond ponytails just visible in the crowd around the refreshments area.
Restless, she inched forward to sit on the tailgate, watching him stride away, long legs eating up the distance between him and their daughters. Lord have mercy, he had a fine butt, just the right kind to fill out his jeans and make her hands ache to tuck inside his back pockets.
A cleared throat drew her attention back. Jolting, she searched...and found the injured firefighter staring up at her from where he sat on his blanket, his wheelchair beside him. His companion nowhere in sight. “How are you and your family enjoying your stay?”
She slid off the tailgate and leaned against the bumper. Dried leaves and the sweet scent of chocolate carried on a breeze that brought goose bumps to her skin, a phantom touch making her long for Douglas. “The place certainly lives up to its reputation. Are you and your wife having a good time?”
He shook his head. “She’s actually my fiancée.”
“Oh, well, congratulations.”
“Thanks, but not for much longer.” He reached for his water bottle, only to come up short. A curse hissed low. “Could you pass me that, please?”
“Of course.” She scooped up the metal cylinder with a fire department logo blazoned on the side. “Here you go.”
“Thanks. I hate asking, but such is life.”
Remembering how Tyler hated for people to loom over him, she sat on the ground, cross-legged so that they were eye-to-eye. “It’s no trouble, truly. Is there something else I can get for you?”
“A new life?” He shook his head fast. “Forget I said that. I came here hoping to find a way to finally make her understand we’re over. Maybe you can help me with that.”