Never Let Me Go

by McAvoy, J. J. ;

  “Thank you, ma’am, enjoy your game,” Luella said. She sat behind the monitor and typed our names. “Alaric, you want bumpers?”

  He signed and spoke, “I’m not a baby, Mommy.”

  “What about you, Dorian?”

  “I think I can manage. All I have to do is knock the pins down with the ball, right?”

  How hard could that be?

  LUELLA

  He was horrible.

  It was almost funny how bad he was at this. Even Alaric looked away when his ball went into the gutter.

  “Maybe we should put the bumpers up,” Alaric signed for me, his expression pained.

  I pretended to crack my knuckles and neck before going to stand next to him.

  “I’m awful at this.” He smiled, totally shocked, reaching for the ball again.

  I placed a hand on his shoulders and pushed down. “You are way too stiff. Having proper posture is great, but you need to relax. Wiggle your arms.”

  He stared at me as if I were insane.

  “Like this.” I showed him and then took the ball from his hands.

  “Lulu—”

  “Wiggle, Dorian.” I kind of liked bossing him around.

  He shook his hands. “Next?”

  “No, shake it like you mean it.”

  “Daddy, like this.” Alaric wiggled like he was dancing.

  “Okay, just think about something that makes you completely relax.’’ After a few seconds, his body language changed. “That’s it.”

  “I’m thinking about something that makes me relax,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine.

  Ignoring how my heart started to race, I handed him the ball. “Just like you skip rocks over a pond, you throw.”

  “Skip rocks?”

  “You haven’t done that either?” I gasped.

  “Just joking,” he snickered at me.

  This time the ball went down the middle perfectly, giving him a strike. You would have thought he’d won the bowling championship of the world with the fist pump he did, something I was sure he learned from Alaric.

  “Mommy. you can’t make him that good. Now how do I win?” Alaric pouted.

  “What did he say? All I got was ‘do I win?’” Dorian asked.

  “Nothing,” Alaric replied.

  “That doesn’t seem like nothing.” He looked at me.

  “If you haven’t noticed, Alaric is just a tad bit competitive.”

  “Yep, he’s a Rhys-Gallagher. My family liked two things: winning and celebrating a win.”

  “Well, I’m going to beat both of you so you can appreciate defeat and learn to smile through a loss.” I lifted my bowling ball.

  “You would crush me on my birthday? You are cold, Ms. Thorne.”

  Alaric grinned. “I’m winning.”

  “For now.” I stuck my tongue out before moving forward.

  Seconds before I let go of the ball, Dorian yelled, “Watch out.”

  The ball flew into the gutter. Alaric and Dorian gave each other a high-five.

  “Really?” I crossed my arms.

  Dorian shrugged. “I can be cold too.”

  “It’s on.”

  DORIAN

  “You have no shame,” I said to her en route to our next destination.

  She bobbed her head and whistled with the music. On her shirt was the winner button she got after blowing Alaric and me out of the water.

  Alaric crossed his arms. “I want a rematch.”

  “I second that,” I added.

  “Winning isn’t everything, Alaric. I promise I’ll cheer for you either way.”

  “And what about me?” Dorian asked.

  “I will cheer for you too.”

  “Good. Where else are we going?” I stuck my hand out the window, enjoying the breeze.

  “We will be there in a few seconds. Don’t worry, you get to keep your shoes on this time.”

  If we ever went again, I was buying my own pair to wear. She giggled like she knew what I was thinking.

  “Here we are.” She parked.

  “The aquarium?”

  “I remembered the fish tank in the penthouse.”

  “Will there be sharks and alligators?” Alaric excitedly signed before taking off his seat belt.

  “Yep, and you can even touch the alligators.”

  Luella got the tickets while Alaric pulled my hand impatiently.

  Inside, the majority of the light came from the tanks that lined the walls. The first thing we saw were baby seals. Alaric put his face up against the glass, and a seal came up to his face. He giggled, waving at them. I stared at the small school of rainbow fish swimming past my face.

  “Dad.” Alaric yanked on my arm.

  “Huh?”

  He pointed to a dome for us to stick our head into. We stood inside it, and it was like we were underwater, this time looking from above at the seals as they swam.

  “That one is weird. What is it?” He pointed.

  “A jellyfish.” I didn’t know the sign for that. “And it’s not weird, just different.”

  “Jelly-fish.” He signed for me. “Like SpongeBob? But they are pink.”

  I really had no idea how to break it to him that SpongeBob was not a good source of aquatic information.

  “There are some that are pink too,” I answered. He wrapped his arms around my neck, resting his head on my shoulder.

  My heart felt heavy in that moment, and I knew I truly loved him, no matter what. He was mine.

  “Can we go see the alligators now?”

  “Alligators?” I remembered the sign from their conversation near the car. “Where is that?”

  When we stepped out of the underwater viewing dome, Luella took a picture of us.

  “We weren’t ready.” Alaric tried to adjust.

  “I know, that’s why I took it. Candid shots are the best.”

  “Candid?” Alaric looked at me.

  “Pictures you don’t know are being taken.”

  “Then when do you know to smile?”

  Lulu translated, but I followed along much better now.

  “The trick is to always be smiling,” she said before taking another photo.

  “Can we see the alligators now or do you need more photos?” I asked her.

  “Can’t I do both?” She beamed, and she was cute.

  Forcing myself to look around, I saw the line for the exhibition. Luckily, there were not that many people waiting, and Alaric rushed over the moment he saw a woman in cargo shorts holding up a baby alligator.

  “You guys go on without me,” Lulu said. When I turned back, she was waiting at the entrance staring at the reptiles, completely terrified.

  “Are you scared?”

  “No,” she lied.

  “Then why are you standing here?”

  “I wanted to get a few pictures of the fish.”

  “We can come back.” I took her hand, pulling her in.

  She jumped back when she saw the snake exhibit, her face bunched up in disgust. “Dorian—”

  I laughed. “Come on, you’re safe.”

  “Mommy, look.” Alaric came over holding a spider in his hands, and I took a few steps back, shivering in disgust.

  “Yeah, I’m feeling really safe,” she muttered.

  “Can we keep him?”

  “No,” Luella and I both said quickly.

  He pouted and left.

  “I can’t believe you’re afraid of spiders.” She shook her head at me.

  “There’s a snake behind you.”

  She jumped, grabbing on to me. “Get it away!”

  When I laughed, she glared but still held on to me.

  “You watch out for the spiders, and I got the snakes, deal?”

  She stuck out her hand. “I like the way you think, Mr. Rhys-Gallagher.”

  “I am a genius,” I said, shaking it.

  Rolling her eyes, she followed Alaric. The minute she pulled away, my arm felt cold.

  “Your wife dropped th
is.” One of the workers handed me her camera. How did she not even notice?

  “Thank you.” The moment I took it from her, I realized I didn’t try to correct her, it hadn’t crossed my mind to.

  It felt wrong to claim her, especially after everything she had been through, but in a way, she felt like mine too.

  You’re in deep, Dorian.

  But I didn’t care.

  LUELLA

  I had one more place I wanted to take him, but Alaric was exhausted, so I drove us back to the house. When I parked, Dorian got out, lifting Alaric with him as he went, and it was then I noticed Finnick pull up behind me in the Mercedes.

  “Were you with us all day?” I asked when he stepped out.

  “Yes, ma’am, from the bowling alley to the aquarium and your lunch.”

  I’d totally forgotten about him. I reminded him, “Luella or Lulu is fine.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” He smiled at me, and I gave up.

  “Please relax, we aren’t going anywhere else. I feel like I dragged you around all day, and you had no fun.”

  “Honestly, ma’am, you have no reason to worry about me.”

  I went inside, where Russell stood waiting. I handed him the key to the truck and my camera. “Thank you again.”

  “No problem at all.” I walked toward the stairs. “And ma’am?”

  “Yes? And I said you could call me Lulu.”

  He looked at me kindly, shaking his head. “I’m not sure I can, especially when you felt very much like the lady of the house today. I’m glad to see you with your head held high.”

  Before I could respond, he was already walking away.

  The lady of the house? Like Mrs. Rhys-Gallagher?

  I tried not to think about it. Instead, I quietly went up the stairs so as to not wake Alaric. In his room, Dorian took off Alaric’s shoes and socks, then tucked him in. He even gently took off his hearing aid since he knew Alaric hated sleeping with it. I had done it so many times, it was almost surreal watching another person take care of him.

  I moved to close the bedroom window and stopped to appreciate the white baby breaths in the distance. It was like a carpet of white in the backyard. Even in the darkness, they looked stunning.

  “Lulu?” Dorian whispered, coming up beside me. “What’s wrong?”

  “Your garden is beautiful. But why baby breaths?”

  He was silent for a long time before gently brushing his hand over mine on the windowsill.

  “They were my mother’s favorite. It’s getting cold, let’s go.” He led me out into the hall. “He had a lot of fun today.”

  “I’m glad, but I hope you did too. I know it wasn’t much but—”

  “The only thing that could possibly make the day better is this.” He kissed me.

  When his lips touched mine, I wrapped my arms around his neck, and his snaked around my waist, holding me tightly. When he bit my bottom lip, I moaned, opening my lips for him. His tongue entered my mouth and we backed up until my back was pressed against the wall. His hands slipped up my sides to cup my breasts, squeezing them through my shirt.

  “I don’t want to stop,” he said.

  “Neither do I.” I really, really didn’t want to.

  His eyes met mine. “Just one more kiss.”

  This time, I couldn’t keep from grabbing onto his hair. He squeezed my ass and pressed against me. I could feel how hard he was, how badly he wanted this. Wanted me.

  “This was a mistake.” He pulled away. “Kissing you only makes me want you more. I want you in ways I can’t even begin to describe. I want to know everything about you, and at the same time explore every inch of your body with my tongue.”

  “Show me, don’t tell me,” I said softly, kissing him. He grinned and lifted me over his shoulder. “Dorian!” I laughed.

  “Goodnight, sir,” Russell called from downstairs.

  Oh my God!

  “Good night!” Dorian called back, and I smacked his back, covering my face, unable to stop laughing. All of a sudden, I felt my back hit the padding of the bed, and he was over me.

  “Are you blushing, Ms. Thorne?”

  “No,” I lied, putting my arms around his neck.

  “Liar.” The grin on his face grew as he kissed me again. His tongue entered my mouth, electrifying all of me. Pulling at his shirt, he broke away just so I could remove it for him while his hands started pulling off my pants. One by one, in between kisses, we stripped the clothes off each other until we were both naked, our skin pressed against each other.

  He kissed the sides of my face tenderly, before kissing down my neck, down to my breast, kissing them both before moving down the rest of my stomach. His kisses were soft, so sweet, they sent a shiver up my spine. When he kissed between my thighs, I couldn’t help but gasp, my body rising off the bed. He didn’t stop there. I felt his lips on my legs, he even kissed my feet.

  “Dorian...” I whispered, but I sat up, and I wasn’t sure why.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked above me.

  I could only shake my head and reach up to pull him down for another kiss. How could I explain when I wasn’t even sure why I was like this either? As his arms wrapped around me, my heart ached, everything felt hazy, like the sweetest of dreams.

  Oh no.

  “Shit,” I whispered, which was completely unromantic.

  “What?”

  I stared up at him, my mouth slightly opened, my heart racing, and just told him the truth. “I think I’m falling in love first. You’d think I’d be a little bit more guarded by now.”

  I closed my eyes, not able to look at him, but he just stroked the side of my head. “Believe me, Lulu, you aren’t first.”

  When he put his forehead on mine, I opened my eyes, only to see him waiting. His beautiful blue eyes looked nowhere else but at me. His hand on my hip, our lips hovering each other, he slid inside me. I gripped on to his shoulders and squeezed as I felt him fill me.

  I kissed his jaw before whispering, “Happy Birthday, Dorian.”

  “Thank you,” he said before thrusting forward. Wrapping my arms and legs around him, he made love to me.

  14

  That Four-Letter Word

  DORIAN

  Her naked body was wrapped around me as she slept. I could feel every inch of her against me. Tonight was different. We hadn’t fucked each other, not like we’d done in the past. What was it about this woman that drove me to the brink of insanity, in so many different ways? Despite the fact I was exhausted, I wanted her again. I wanted more. I wanted to make love to her. I wanted to fuck her. I wanted to watch her laugh, cook, blush. I just wanted more.

  Gently, I lifted her leg off of me and got up, covering her with the bed sheet before grabbing my boxers, and walked out the room. I just needed to think, to breathe without the smell of our time together and her body clouding my mind completely. I checked in on Alaric, and, funny enough, he slept like his mother, his leg and arm over the pillow. I couldn’t help but smile, only leaving the door open a little bit before making way downstairs. However, with each step, I couldn’t get her words out of my mind.

  “I thinking I’m falling in love first.” How could she say something so innocently? She even looked slightly embarrassed by herself. It was cute. She was cute and beautiful and sexy all at once, and each side of her tempted me. How the hell was that fair? How did she have so much control over me already?

  I wanted to hear her moan for me again. I wanted to wake her up and bury myself in her again.

  “What the hell is wrong with me?” I groaned, reaching into the fridge to get a bottle of water.

  “You really want to go there?”

  “Jesus Christ.” I jumped, the water slipping in my hands. Russell set the tray he was holding on the counter before throwing me a towel. “Thanks, why are you still up?”

  “I could ask you the same.” He lifted a fork to polish. “But I already know the answer to that.”

  “Do you now?” I sat down opposi
te him and reached for a spoon. He smacked my hands.

  “Gloves.” He threw me a pair.

  “You know you don’t have to do this, Russell. I don’t need to see my face in the silverware,” I muttered, pulling on white gloves.

  “Since when?” He snickered. “The Dorian Rhys-Gallagher I used to know was a stickler for detail. Didn’t you once fire a maid for accidentally ruining one of your suits?”

  “It was a hand-tailored William Westmacott. It cost more than she made in a year.”

  “When you found out she was a widowed mother of two, you had her hired at The Van Thorp and gave her healthcare,” he said smugly, pretending to inspect the fork but really inspecting me.

  “Not one of my finer moments.”

  “Which moment? The one where you fired her or the one where you gave her another job?”

  I kept polishing, not answering him.

  “That is one of the many things wrong with you.”

  “What does that mean?” I asked.

  “It means you don’t know which Dorian Rhys-Gallagher to be—the ruthless businessman who cares for only money and status, or the compassionate man who secretly donates a good portion of that money to dozens of charities around the world.”

  I stopped staring at my reflection in the spoon. “I need to be brutal in business, you remember what they did to my father when he got sick. Everyone was trying to steal Rhys-Gallagher National right out from under him. They came to the hospital to trick him into giving up shares and signing over his stock. Compassion is weakness.”

  “All I’ve seen in you this last week is compassion, especially with Ms. Thorne.”

  I shook my head. “That’s different. She deserves compassion.”

  “Why, because you’re in love with her?”

  “I—I don’t know what you are talking about,” I muttered, and even I didn’t seem convinced by that.

  “Are you really going to lie to me now?” He scoffed, shaking his head at me. “You sure went through a lot of effort to find her.”

  “It’s complicated, and no, I’m not nice to her because I’m attracted to her. She’s been through a lot.”