by Kate Steele
A fire started in Ethan’s belly. His eyes connected with Crewe’s mirror image. There was heat and need reflected there. Ethan could only stare as all movement between them stopped. When Crewe turned to him, Ethan met him face to face.
Crewe’s hand lifted. He reached out and brushed his fingertips over Ethan’s cheek. “I want to kiss you so badly it hurts.”
Ethan’s stomach twisted but instead of melting into Crewe’s arms like he once dreamed he would, Ethan drew back. Surprising even himself, he asked, “Why?”
Crewe blinked as though he too was surprised by Ethan’s question. He quickly recovered. “Because there’s something about you that draws me like no one else ever has.”
“But you don’t know me. Before last night we’d never even spoke to each other.”
“Haven’t you ever heard of instant attraction?”
“I’ve heard of it and I don’t trust it. Things like that seem to flare fast and burn out,” Ethan lamented softly, his voice tinged with regret. “You said you noticed me in school. Why didn’t you ever talk to me?”
“It was too soon.”
Ethan frowned. “What do you mean?”
“We were both too young, Ethan. I couldn’t offer you anything back then.”
“I would have settled for your friendship.”
“I wouldn’t have settled for that. I wanted so much more.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I wanted you then and I want you now. What I feel for you isn’t instant attraction. I’ve felt it for years. I want to get to know you. I want to spend time with you and… oh hell, I’m just going to come right out and say it. I want you in my life and in my bed.”
Stunned by Crewe’s admission, Ethan stepped back, then walked to the chairs that lined part of the wall and took the one next to his coat. His heart pounded, his chest felt tight and his stomach had tied itself into a knot. Breathing hard, he looked up to where Crewe stood watching him.
Unbidden, words tumbled out of his mouth. “I’m gay. I’ve never told anyone that. I’m telling you because Nick says you’re straight. He said I should be careful.” Ethan’s cheeks blazed but he steeled himself, forcing the words out. “I don’t want to be a fuck toy for some straight guy who’s looking for something to entertain himself until the right woman comes along.”
Crewe walked over and took the chair next to Ethan. He reached for Ethan’s hand. Ethan let it lie limply in Crewe’s. “Ethan, please look at me.” Ethan looked up into eyes filled with open sincerity. “I swear to you that’s not what this is about. It’s true I only dated girls in high school. When I went to college I experimented with men. I liked being with a man just as much if not more than a woman, but the point is I never met anyone who touched me inside. I mean really touched me.”
Ethan wanted to turn away but Crewe captured his chin, forcing him to keep their eye contact. “Do you remember that day in the library when we came face to face for the first time?” Ethan nodded. “I followed you to the library a couple of times after that,” Crewe confessed. “I couldn’t figure out why you fascinated me so much. I’d never liked another boy before. I finally talked to my parents about it.”
Ethan’s eyes went round with shock. “About me? You talked to your parents about me?”
“I did,” Crewe answered with a smile. He released Ethan’s chin with a soft brush of his fingertips. “You know what they said?” Ethan shook his head. “They said that even if we were meant to be together someday, we were both too young and I agreed with them. You were only fifteen, Ethan. I was graduating and going off to college. I couldn’t make you mine and then leave you. It wouldn’t have been right.”
“Sixteen. I was sixteen,” Ethan corrected softly.
“Sixteen then, but still too young.”
“Did your parents really say that? Weren’t they upset that you liked another boy?”
Crewe shook his head. “My parents are very sensible people. I know you’re going to like them. But what about you? You told Nick about me?”
Ethan nodded. “I didn’t really mean to say anything more than that I’d run into you and that you’d taken me home.” He shrugged. “I guess it was when I told him that you’d invited me here that he knew something was up.”
“How?”
“He asked me why I accepted your invitation. I told him I wasn’t sure why.”
“Is that the truth? You didn’t know why?”
Shaking his head, Ethan blushed and worried his bottom lip between his teeth for a moment before answering. “I knew why. I wanted to see you again. I… um… I like you. I… liked you in school.”
Crewe’s grin was wide and immediate. “God, you’re going to hate me for saying this but you’re adorable, you know that?”
“Oh, jeez,” Ethan huffed while squirming with disgust in his seat.
Crewe laughed but quickly sobered. “Since we’ve established the fact that I like you and you like me, do you think I could kiss you now?”
“I guess.”
“You’re not sure?”
“It’s just that I’ve never…” Ethan’s foot and leg began to bounce with nervous tension.
“You’ve never kissed another guy?”
“No.”
“Does that mean you’ve never?”
“No,” Ethan hurriedly interrupted.
“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll make it good for you. I promise.”
Ethan looked up sharply, his rising temper bringing fire to his eyes. “Got much of an ego?”
Crewe’s eyes widened, a smile tugging at his lips. “You know, I thought you were shy and quiet but you’re a little spitfire, aren’t you?”
“Don’t call me little.”
“Ethan, are you deliberately trying to pick a fight with me?”
“Not that I know of.”
“Good, because like it or not I’m going to kiss you now.” Crewe stopped. “Um, that didn’t come out right. Damn it! Would you just please kiss me. I’m dying here.”
The desperation in Crewe’s voice brought a smile to Ethan’s lips. Unexpected amusement tempered his unease and he leaned forward, wanting, needing the contact now as much as Crewe. Crewe leaned in and their lips met, lightly, tentatively. The kiss slowly deepened and Crewe groaned. Ethan felt the vibration from that softly urgent sound all the way to his toes. His head spun and he reached out, hands landing on Crewe’s biceps.
Muscles flexed under his hands and arms slid around him, pulling him close, lifting him until, with a gasp, he landed in Crewe’s lap. As natural as breathing, Ethan’s arms wound around Crewe’s neck. Crewe lightly painted Ethan’s lips with his tongue, urging them open, sliding inside when Ethan answered his unspoken request.
Eyes closed, Ethan sank into the sensations being fed to him by Crewe. His self-imposed darkness was filled with the warmth that built between their bodies. Heat that magnified and released scent. Ethan breathed in Crewe’s masculine musk, the aroma fueling his awakening desire. Crewe’s lips were soft, his taste unique and exciting. Learning quickly, Ethan let his tongue play with Crewe’s, moaning at the dizzying intimacy of the act. Arms around Crewe’s neck, the fingers of one hand roved over his muscular shoulders while the others played with the soft hair at Crewe’s nape.
Ethan’s body resonated with every sound. His breath and Crewe’s. Crewe’s low growls and his own needful whimpers. He pushed himself tighter against Crewe, craving the closeness, needing the connection. The feel of Crewe’s cock, hard against his hip was electrifying. His own had filled and desperately demanded attention. Lost in this dark, sensual world of their creation, Ethan became desire personified. He was ready to remain lost forever.
It was only Crewe breaking the kiss that brought him back. “Oh God, Ethan, fuck! Baby, I wasn’t going to push you but come home with me. Please?”
Pulling himself from the nearly overwhelming sensual stupor, Ethan managed to nod.
Crewe set his forehead to Ethan’s. “Much
as I want to, I’m not going to kiss you again. Yet. I’m afraid I’ll never get you home and I don’t want to make love to you on a rubber mat. Not to mention I don’t keep supplies here.”
“Supplies?” Ethan murmured softly before licking his swollen lips.
“Lube and condoms.” Crewe swept his thumb over the moisture that coated Ethan’s lower lip. “You have the most kissable, suckable lips I’ve ever seen.”
“Don’t suck on them. I’ll look like a trout.”
Crewe chuckled. “I got news for you, they’re already swelling a little, but they’re absolutely edible.”
“I hate them.”
“Why?”
Ethan ducked his head. “You heard that kid in the mini-mart. He said I had a pretty mouth.”
Crewe hugged him close. “You know, there are guys who’d kill to look like you. You’ve got this whole ‘pouty-lipped, fine boned, model slim and cute as hell’ thing going on.”
“I don’t like it, Crewe. All it’s ever gotten me is picked on.”
“Oh, baby. Those people were assholes. You know their type, insecure with no self-esteem. They have to make somebody else feel bad to make them feel better about themselves. It’s not right and it’s not fair and you didn’t deserve that, but you’re not gonna worry about that anymore. I’m gonna turn you into the karate kid and the next guy who picks on you, you can dump on his ass.”
“I thought you said this stuff wasn’t about aggression, only defense.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t like the idea of anyone picking on you.”
“You’re starting to sound like Nick and Dustin.”
“I’m flattered to be put in the same class as those two. They’re good men, both of them for watching out for you. That’s what family’s about. It’s too bad it doesn’t work out that way for everyone. I always think it’s such a waste when siblings or siblings and parents don’t get along.”
“Yeah, I’ve been lucky in that department.”
Crewe sighed and stood, setting Ethan on his feet. “Yes, you have and now I’m the one who’s getting lucky. Lucky to be with you. You ready to go? I’ll follow you home so you can drop off your car. We can go to my house from there.” Crewe reseated himself and put his shoes on.
“You could just go home and wait for me. I could walk over if you tell me the house number.”
Crewe snorted. “I’m not letting you walk five blocks at night in the freezing cold. Now get your shoes on, mister.”
“Are you always this impatient?”
Crewe rose from his chair. “It’s not just impatience, I want you safe. Other than that, where you and a bed are concerned? Yes, I’m impatient. But don’t worry. When I get you in bed I’m going to be patience incarnate.” Crewe leaned down to whisper in Ethan’s ear. “You’re gonna beg me to let you come.”
“Oh, fuck. Don’t do that,” Ethan breathed. He managed to slip his shoes on and shrug into his coat.
“Why?”
“‘Cause my knees almost folded.”
“Mmm, now that’s what I like to hear. Come on.”
Chapter Four
With a hand on Ethan’s back, Crewe guided him to the front door, shutting out most of the lights and locking the door behind them. Ethan went to his car, hyperaware of Crewe’s gaze on him. He unlocked his car, slid behind the wheel and started it up. Seeing that Crewe was in his truck and had it started, Ethan put his car in gear, cranked up the heat and headed out. The lights of Crewe’s truck flashed in his review mirror.
Oh, fuck. What am I doing? Should I be doing this? I’m twenty-five. Why shouldn’t I be doing this? Son of a bitch. Why do I have to be a virgin? Oh, fuck. What if I suck at it? A nervous chuckled popped from between Ethan’s lips. Suck at it. Oh God, what if he wants me to suck him? Oh God! What if he sucks me? Oh fuck!
By the time they arrived at Ethan’s house and he’d parked the car in the garage, he was a nervous wreck. Walking to Crewe’s truck felt like taking the final walk that ended in front of a firing squad. His knees felt weak and his hand was shaking as he reached for the truck handle. Climbing in, he gave Crewe a fleeting, weak smile before facing forward and fumbling with his seatbelt.
Crewe’s hand landed on his thigh, making him jump. “Relax,” Crewe admonished softly. “It’s gonna be all right. I promise.”
Ethan gave him a jerky nod. Crewe shook his head, giving Ethan a reassuring smile before steering the truck back out on the street. They were at Crewe’s house in no time. Just before Crewe eased the truck into the garage, Ethan had enough time to see that the house was a large, white clapboard with a wide front porch. He gave the lowering garage door an almost longing glance as Crewe hurried him out of the truck and ushered him into the kitchen.
Crewe took his coat off and laid it over a chair, then held out his hand for Ethan’s. “As you can see, this is the kitchen. I was going to give you a tour of the house, but at this point I think that would be just cruel.”
Taking his coat off, Ethan gave him a puzzled frown as he handed it over. “What do you mean?”
“It means the tension rolling off you is so thick I could cut it with a knife,” Crewe teased. “Let’s go upstairs. The only tour you’re getting for now is what’s on the direct route to my bedroom.”
Crewe took Ethan’s hand and pulled him along. Ethan wasn’t sure whether to laugh at Crewe’s gentle gibe, be pissed at it or just continue to be freaked out. He settled for freaked out.
With his hand captured by Crewe’s and his stomach doing jumping jacks, he had little choice but to follow. Along the way he caught a fleeting glimpse of the living room, the stairs, and a darkened hallway before Crewe pulled him into his bedroom and shut the door behind them.
Releasing Ethan’s hand, Crewe crossed to a low dresser and turned on a small lamp. The light was dim, giving the room an intimate glow, an impression amplified by the closed door and the large bed that so prominently loomed in Ethan’s sight. Ethan’s breath began to speed, his lungs laboring to catch up with the increasing rhythm of his heart. When Crewe turned and slowly prowled across the room to him, Ethan forgot to breathe.
Crewe reached him and tapped him on the nose with the tip of his finger. “Breathe, Ethan. You know what your problem is?”
Eyes wide, Ethan silently shook his head.
“You think too much.”
With that revelation, Crewe took Ethan in his arms and kissed him. It was an effective ploy. Ethan’s head whirled and he was lost to everything but the sweet hunger engendered by Crewe’s kiss. The fact that his feet were moving as Crewe guided him registered in some low level of his consciousness. It wasn’t until the room spun and he landed with a soft thump on the mattress that he realized he’d been walked to the bed.
He bounced on the landing and bounced again as Crewe hit the bed next to him. Crewe sat up and pulled Ethan’s shoes off, letting them drop to the floor. Ethan heard four distinct thumps and knew Crewe had taken off his own shoes as well.
“Scoot up and over, babe. Don’t want anybody falling off the edge,” Crewe joked.
His eyes followed Ethan’s progress, the heat in them warming Ethan while sending a skitter of nervous tension down his spine. Crewe rolled to his hands and knees, and once more Ethan found himself being stalked. Crewe crawled gracefully to him and loomed over him, looking down at Ethan. His golden brown eyes shimmered softly in the low light. A slow smile curved his lips and creased the skin at the outer edges of Crewe’s eyes. Fascinated, Ethan reached up and brushed a fingertip over those small furrows.
“Hi,” Crewe breathed.
“Hi,” Ethan answered softly.
Catching Ethan’s hand in his, Crewe brought Ethan’s finger to his lips. His tongue slipped out and laved the soft pad. Ethan shivered when Crewe drew his finger between his lips and lightly sucked. His cock instantly responded, blood rushing through the thick veins while his flesh firmed and filled. Unable to help himself, Ethan softly moaned.
Crewe released his finge
r. “Someday I’m going to take you in my mouth just to feel you get hard against my tongue. It’s enough for now knowing that just this has you hard for me. You are hard for me, aren’t you?”
Cheeks heating, Ethan nodded.
“Mmm, I’m going to find out for myself soon but for right now, I want your mouth. This gorgeous, lush mouth.” Crewe traced his wet fingertip over Ethan’s mouth. “These lips have haunted my dreams for years.”
Without hesitation Crewe lowered his head, fitting his lips to Ethan’s. Automatically, Ethan wound his arms around Crewe, opening up and giving in to the kisses he was coming to crave above all else. One taste made it sinfully easy to give Crewe exactly what he wanted. Ethan reaped the rewards, his more than willing cooperation fulfilling his own needs and desires.
Though his thoughts were on hold, Ethan’s body was on automatic. Every available part of his body that was in a position to was plastered against Crewe. His thighs parted, one leg winding over Crewe’s. Using Crewe as an anchor, Ethan undulated against Crewe, rocking, his body unconsciously begging to be touched. Crewe didn’t disappoint. Never losing contact with Ethan’s lips, Crewe’s fingers plucked at and opened the buttons on Ethan’s polo shirt. Reaching down, he opened the button on Ethan’s pants and pulled the shirt free from the waistband.
The large, hot hand that slid under his shirt and glided over his body had Ethan pushing into the touch. When tactile fingertips closed over one nipple and lightly pinched he arched and cried out. Crewe swallowed the sound and kept Ethan’s mouth for a moment more before sliding down to lick at his taut, pink nipple. Ethan’s hands found Crewe’s head, fingers winding in his hair and pulling tight. He heard Crewe gasp and looked up to see tears in Crewe’s eyes.
“Ease up, babe. You’re gonna snatch me bald,” Crewe teased, his own hand reaching up to cover one of Ethan’s.
“Sorry,” Ethan panted, loosening his hold. “I’m sorry. It just feels so good.”
“I knew you’d like that. Let’s get this shirt off you.”
Crewe pushed the shirt up and Ethan raised his arms to make the doing easier. His shirt was pulled up and off. Crewe made short work of his own shirt. It joined Ethan’s on the floor. Their bare chests came together and Ethan shuddered at the contact. Soft yet wiry hair tickled his nipples, bringing them both up hard. Intrigued, Ethan slipped a hand between them, running his fingers over the short, gilded whorls of hair that covered Crewe’s chest.