Dodger

by Dan Gallagher

9

  SNAKEPIT IS BOOMING AS WE hustle our way through the crowd. Paiger gets carded by the muscle bound jerk at the door but as soon as he recognizes her he apologizes and lets her in. He blocks me, though.

  “ID, fella.”

  I smile my winning grin. “What, you don't recognize me? I'm the Dodger.”

  He slants his eyes. Recognize. “Oh, yeah. Come on in.”

  It's not glorious enough of a place to require a muscle bound jerk at the door but they have one anyway, two in fact. It's packed as usual, even more so since Silly Goose is playing, and we can barely see over the people in front of us let alone get to the bar. I take the lead and play fullback for the petite Paiger, who hooks her arm in mine so's not to get lost in the wake. The crowd spits us out at the service well and we nestle up to a few punk rock chicks. They ignore us and commence talking about the lead singer's cock.

  And then... there she is.

  Kara.

  I see her first, and the wave pool that has become my emotional threshold gets turned on full blast. Everything comes rushing back, all the joy, all the pain, all of it, and I think I'm going to pass out until I hear the sweet voice in the back of my head.

  “Jim... it's okay.”

  Paiger. Her hand is on my shoulder. Her other hand is signaling Kara.

  She finally turns her head and sees us.

  Here we go.

  There's shock and surprise in her smile as she approaches. Maybe even more shock and surprise when Paiger runs her tongue around my ear. Even I'm taken aback and squeal in delight.

  “All right, hey bartender,” Paiger says. “A rum and coke for me and a Stella for this fine piece of ass right here.”

  She grabs my ass just to send home the fact that my ass is in fact the ass in question. I smile at Kara, who's still trying to process the no doubt bewildering exchange we're having this minute.

  “Hi, Kara.”

  She smiles. “Hi, Jim. Wow, you, uh... look good.”

  “Thanks, you too.”

  She goes to get the drinks. Paiger whispers in my ear, “She's already jealous. Let's sell this.” I concur and face her, brush the hair from her ear and whisper nonsense back. She laughs and runs her hand down my arm. The touch alone feels so amazing I almost don't realize Kara's standing there with our drinks. I look over, still buzzing from the tongue in my ear.

  “Oh, thanks.”

  “Sure.” Paiger starts looking around the bar, hand still on my ass. Kara leans in.

  “It's good to see you, Jim. Did you know I worked here?”

  I sip. “No, actually. Paige here is a big fan of the Goose, so lo and behold, here we are. I'm sorry, I should introduce you.”

  Paiger turns, right on cue. “Hi, I'm Paige!”

  Kara extends her hand. “Kara.”

  “Nice to meet you.”

  They shake, Paiger with vigor, Kara with weakness. She's already on the ropes. Paiger kisses me on the cheek and darts off into the crowd. I watch her go, then turn and meet Kara's gaze. It's dripping with complete love. She turns like she didn't want me to see it but I sure as hell did and there's no turning back.

  “So this is a cushy gig, huh?”

  “Oh, yeah. They trained me behind the bar as soon as I started.”

  “That's right, they didn't want to let you bartend at the other place, did they?”

  “No. Sexist pigs.”

  “In my experience I've always preferred the services of an attractive young lady behind the bar.”

  “Well you're a dude, Jim.”

  “That I am.”

  “So how'd you meet Paige? She's... really pretty.”

  “We met at one of my shows.”

  “Cool. You're still in the band? What are you guys called again?”

  “Glass Cabin.”

  “Right. You guys are good.”

  “We broke up.”

  “Oh.”

  “Long story.”

  “I'll bet.”

  “How about you? When did you move back?”

  “About four months ago. Saved up a big wad of cash babysitting and living at home for a year and a half, then realized I was so bored that I didn't know what to do with myself.”

  “You missed Chicago.”

  “Yeah. A lot. And, you know... everyone's here.”

  “Ah, yes. The Contingent.”

  “Yes, the Contingent.”

  “Peer pressure never fails. Whatever became of Rock-A-Bye Baby?”

  “Oh.” She laughs. “Well, I'm still working on it.”

  I smile. “You should finish it.”

  “I know, I should.”

  There's a pause as the band starts their sound check. Paiger emerges from the crowd with an empty glass and a smile.

  “All right! They sound great. Hey Karen, can I get another?”

  Kara just kind of looks at her, but Paiger turns right back around without missing a beat. The music is too loud for me to say or hear anything now so I just shrug. Kara smiles halfheartedly and goes to make the drink.

  I turn to Paiger.

  “Laying it on a little thick, aren't we?”

  She just smiles. “I don't do anything half assed, Jim. If you're going to be my pretend boyfriend, you better get used to it.”

  And with that she jams her tongue down my throat. No tongue has been there in awhile and it feels so good I almost faint and/or orgasm.

  It's a short but thorough kiss and when we break I just sway in the breeze, savoring the flavor. Green apple lip balm and rum, tasty.

  Then I realize Kara is standing right next to us. We turn.

  And the look on her face is priceless.

  “It's nine dollars for everything, guys.”

  Paiger drags me into the crowd as the members of Silly Goose strap on their instruments. She insisted on a shot and that Kara join us so the three of us up ended Jame-O's. My vodka soaked stomach lining lurches as the whiskey fucks it. Go to town, you two, go to town, I love it.

  Paiger is yelling in my ear.

  “Hey, that was awesome! She's totally jealous!”

  “Oh yeah?”

  “Did you see the way she reacted when I spit some of my shot into your mouth? Come on! She's weak.”

  She's right. Kara is the jealous type. It's been heir apparent and blatantly obvious ever since that night at the bar. She so desperately wants what she can't have, even if she's had it already and just kinda tossed it aside. She's exactly like me in that regard and maybe subconsciously that's what attracts us to each other the most. We're both flaky and damaged and jealous, a match made in heaven if there ever was one.

  I look back at the bar to see if she's watching us but it's a sea of pierced heads and tattooed necks. The Goose has quite the following. They kick into their first song and it's loud, rude, aggressive and awesome. I'm in.

  Before I turn back someone's head moves and I see Kara. She sees me, our eyes lock, and the old chemistry explodes back into the atmosphere in a single second. The chills nearly paralyze me.

  I turn back.

  Quickly.

  Paiger gets me another beer and I start to get drunker. Silly Goose rocks. We get into the music and start dancing and singing and jumping around. It reminds me of when Kara and I saw Slim Pickens. If she's watching me right now, I hope that's what she's thinking about too. Recalling and reenacting our good times will spark the memories within her and bring me that much closer to my goal.

  As the band starts their encore, I go over it in my head. For all intents and purposes, the plan has worked. I've planted a seed of jealousy within Kara that will either bring her back into my arms or force her to move even further away than Iowa. I've done what I set out to do, the cool way, not the sappy clod way. I've put in an appearance, and now all I can do is wait.

  And tell Paiger everything.

  They finish the song and everyone roars in applause. Paiger is yelling right along with them but I just stand there, blinking and thinking slowly.

  What have
I done?

  There's only one direction to go with two hundred people all heading for one exit, so there's no way to get back to the bar and say bye to Kara. It's probably a good thing. I'm not going out of my way, ergo I don't look like a sniveling putz. Schnutz. Whatever. We're swept out of Snakepit like it's the Fertile fucking Crescent and spilled onto Southport Avenue with the piercings and tattoos. Paiger lights a cigarette. I do the same.

  “Okay, so what now?” she asks.

  “What what now?” I say, inhaling. “The ball's in her court. I made the casual drop in I wanted to. Anything more would scare her off.”

  “I agree. Do you think it'll work?”

  I blow a few smoke rings into the night. “Hopefully.”

  “Jim, can I ask you something?”

  “I'd be disappointed if you didn't.”

  “Why do you want her back so badly?”

  I ponder the proverbial puzzle Paiger's put upon my parameters. Please.

  “I'm not telling.”

  “No. Uh uh.” She inhales. “I just went through a ridiculous exhibition of pretending to be someone I'm not for you, for your stupid plan, so there's no way you're clamming up on me now.”

  “I said I'd tell you the story, not about what happens after.”

  She glares at me. “So it's not going to have an ending? That's bad storytelling.”

  “This is a story about the Dodger, Paiger. Not me. And once I've told you the whole thing, this is all over.”

  I start walking to the car. Her always loud shoes clack on the sidewalk behind me.

  “Okay, then finish the fucking story.”

  I turn. “Fine. But please drive me the fuck home while I do.”

  We light two more cigarettes and she plays some Joy Division as we hit Lake Shore Drive. I inhale deeply.

  “After we talked at the Pick Me Up, we kind of took a break from each other. I was happy just to salvage anything out of the relationship after the way I'd treated her and was grateful she was cool enough to be cool. I didn't want to push it. So a few weeks went by, and during that time I only saw her once, at the bar with Pete when she stormed out in that fit of jealousy.”

  “Ah. Of course.”

  “Of course is right.” Inhale. “Well, a few days after that I get a text from her asking if I want to grab coffee. Of course I say yes and of course as soon as we meet up, coffee becomes a drink. So we drink. And everything feels... new.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “Well, of course one drink became two and two became four. We caught each other up on our lives and it was nice and playful and innocent and it was like it was the first night we hung out. In other words, before I became an idiot. She looked so goddamned good. God.” I drag my smoke again but see it's extinguished. Damn. “I knew as soon as we started drinking we were doomed. We're too damn alike! You know? Paiger?”

  “I know.”

  “So we meet up with her roommate and a couple of her friends and proceed to get silly drunk, and of course we all wind up back at their place smoking pot and listening to music. And do you really think we could control ourselves? Fuck no! We're making out as soon as our hands can reach each other, even though I know she's still seeing Pete, even though she knows I know. She fucking plays Arcade Fire and She And Him and Broken Social Scene and I'm not supposed to feel seduced? That's some of the sexiest music of all time! I went for her all over again. It was fucked up.”

  “Did you have sex?”

  “I wound up crashing there but no, no we didn't. I tried though. Believe me I tried. I wanted her so bad. I... I guess I still do.”

  We pull up to my building. I unbuckle the seat belt and open the door, then turn to Paiger.

  “You coming in or what?”