Love's Grip

by Nika Michelle

  “What you tryin’a say? I need my hair done?”

  “No,” he laughed. “I love your curls, but I’d love to see your hair straight.”

  “Promise me that you won’t go after Rae tonight, and I’ll get it straightened.”

  Pistol sighed. “I’m just gonna get a car, get some info, and then I’ll be back. Okay?”

  “Promise.”

  “I promise.”

  That pacified me for the moment, so I leaned over and kissed his lips before grabbing the money. Neither of us brought up my rant from the night before or the moment when he laid his head on my breasts. It was just clear to us both that we had no control over what we were feeling for each other. I was having a hard time with it, but I was willing to take a chance on Pistol. My heart was constantly proving that I really had no choice.

  *

  Something had told me not to go the hair salon that I always went to, to get my hair done, but I didn’t want anybody other than Tonia to do my hair. That bitch knew exactly how to stretch out my naturally curly ringlets so that my hair flowed down my back. Not only that, but she was actually cool. We’d hung out plenty of times in the past, but I couldn’t really call her a friend. The catch was, she did Kevia’s hair too.

  I was so glad that my bruises were finally clearing up, and with the help of the makeup Pistol had bought for me, I was able to cover up what was left of them. Tonia didn’t even notice them when I walked in.

  “Hey, girl! Where the hell have you been?” she squealed as she hugged me tightly.

  I winced, because my body was still a little sore. “I’ve been around. Workin’ and tryin’a maintain. What you been up to?” I kept a smile on my face, because I wasn’t one to let folks all up in my business.

  I may have been through hell and back, but I was thankful that I didn’t look like what I’d been through. Despite the marks and bruises, I was still a beautiful being. Rae had tried to break me and beat me down, but he hadn’t succeeded. As long as I had life in me, I was capable of changing my circumstances. I was determined to move on and not let my past keep affecting me.

  “You already know.” She smiled. “Same thing. Work and takin’ care of those twins of mine. They’re gettin’ so damn grown.”

  Tonia had seven-year-old twin daughters, Faith and Hope. They were so cute but were mature way beyond their years. I think that was because she worked so much and left them with her fifteen-year-old sister. Teenagers these days were probably the worst people to choose to babysit. With social media and all the temptations out there, kids exposed to them couldn’t help but do what they were influenced to do.

  “Stop. The twins are adorable, and they’re so smart.”

  Tonia beamed proudly. “You’re right. What you tryin’a get done today?”

  “Girl, I want you to straighten this shit.”

  She popped some gum loudly as she nodded. The salon was packed, so the sound of house music playing and chatter was the norm. “Okay. You need a deep-conditioning treatment too and your ends clipped. You’re slippin’, honey.” Tonia shook her head at me.

  She was right, but she just didn’t know what I had been going through. I played it off. “Like I said, girl, I been working and shit.”

  “I feel you, but I think it’s that nigga you been fuckin’ wit’ that’s takin’ up all your time. What’s his name … ?”

  “I ain’t wit’ him no more.”

  “Oh, dang, okay.”

  The silence between us was awkward as she led me to the shampoo bowls in the back. I knew that getting my hair done was a bad idea. All I could do was hope that Tonia would get me in and out, and that there would be no more talk about my ex. When Tonia shampooed me and massaged my scalp, I felt so relaxed. I even drifted off to sleep for a few minutes.

  “C’mon, boo. You gotta get under the dryer. I got your conditioner in.” Tonia’s voice made me open my eyes.

  “Okay,” I said just as I spotted Kevia at the front of the salon.

  Damn, I knew I should’ve taken my ass to the Dominican salon I went to when Tonia wasn’t available. If that bitch Kevia spotted me, there was going to be some shit. See, I wasn’t scared or nothing, but I didn’t want any drama. I knew that she was still holding a grudge about me pulling that gun out on her. What did she expect, though? She’d betrayed me.

  “You good?” Tonia asked as she pulled the dryer’s hood down over my head.

  I nodded. “Mmm-hmm. I’m straight.”

  It was whatever. If that bitch spotted me, there was just going to be some shit going down.

  Chapter 14

  Pistol

  “Nigga, you won’t believe what the fuck I just heard while I was waitin’ for your ass to come out,” Mike said before I could even sit down good in the passenger seat of his car.

  “What, man?” I tried not to show any sign that I’d been shot the night before, but that shit was still painful.

  “One of the niggas that was in that BMW when you killed G is named Rae and shit. His baby mama got killed last night by some nigga. She’d noticed that somebody was lurking outside her house, and she was paranoid ’cause of what had happened to G. That ho went outside buckin’, ’cause they found her in the yard, wit’ a strap beside her body and shit. That’s crazy as fuck,” he explained.

  Damn. So I’d killed his girl. Daisha was right. She did ride for that nigga, and she’d died for him too. Fuck. Well, at least nobody had connected G’s murder to us. Of course, at that point, nobody knew that I’d shot that bitch, either.

  “Uh, damn. Wish they’d killed that nigga instead.” Fuck!

  “Shit. Damn right, man. That nigga Rae is reckless wit’ his mouth and shit. Ain’t no tellin’ who was gunnin’ for his ass.”

  “So, who told you ’bout that shit? I mean, it ain’t like you run wit’ G’s niggas or nothing.”

  Mike glanced at me and then lit a cigarette. He cracked his car window because he knew that I hated the way that shit smelled. “Man, you know how the streets be. Shit gets around. One of my li’l shawties told me.”

  I nodded and then changed the subject. “Where’s Dank?”

  Damn, I had to rethink my strategy for getting to that nigga Rae. Now that his son’s mom was dead, he’d be caught up in his feelings, trying to avenge her murder. Maybe I’d catch his bitch ass slipping.

  “That’s nigga’s at the trap, handlin’ business. We gettin’ off that shit from that lick fast, man. Shit. Ain’t nothin’ like straight profit.”

  “How’s your li’l one, man?”

  I was concerned about my little cousin and how she was adjusting after what had happened to her. Mike was going on like that shit hadn’t even happened. What did his baby mama have to say about that nigga G? None of that shit had even come up.

  “Oh, she’s a’ight, considerin’ what she been through and shit. Her mama’s all torn up ’bout that nigga, but she’ll get over him, just like she got over me.”

  “Hmm. You right ’bout that, yo. I just hope li’l cuz can get over it.”

  Mike didn’t say anything as he nodded his head to some incomprehensible shit that was playing on the radio. It sounded like that nigga Future. I liked trap music because I could relate to that lifestyle, but half of those niggas who rapped weren’t really spitting no real shit.

  Mike spoke up after the song on the radio ended. “So, what happened to your whip, man? I saw your windows all busted out and shit. Another one of the bitches you fuckin’ done snapped?”

  “Oh, nah, man. I was in an accident last night.”

  “Damn, my nigga. What happened, yo? Glad you good.”

  “Yeah, I’m straight. Some mu’fucka crashed right into the back of me on I-twenty, my nigga. I wanted to stop and shoot that fool, but I kept going and shit.”

  “That’s fucked up, man. It’s all good. My nigga Charlie gon’ take care of you. I ain’t like that old Chevy, anyway. You need some hot shit.”

  “Nah, man. That’s the last thing I need.”
I didn’t want to call any unnecessary attention to myself.

  “Yeah, I forgot. You a nigga who like to stay under the radar. Me, on the other hand, I’m a flashy-ass nigga.” He let out an arrogant cackle as he pulled into the car lot.

  An hour later I drove off the lot with another old-school box Chevy, with Mike’s car in my rearview mirror. This one was indigo blue instead of black. Mike had shaken his head at me when his boy passed me the keys.

  “I’m a simple man,” I’d said with a smile.

  I loved old-school rides. That was my shit. On the way to the car lot, Mike had convinced me to roll to his spot for a few. Dank had just left the trap and wanted to cook on Mike’s grill, smoke something, and have a few drinks. It was cool with me since Daisha was out getting dolled up. Earlier, I’d tried to call and check up on her, but she wasn’t answering. I’d sent her a text telling her to let me know when she was on her way to the crib.

  I arrived at Mike’s place while he was parking in his driveway, and I pulled up behind him and got out.

  “Damn, nigga. You usually have some pussy on deck, but I ain’t heard you talkin’ ’bout no bitches lately,” Mike said when we walked up the driveway of his two-story brick house.

  “Shit, nigga, bitches are the last thing on my mind since that shit happened wit’ Niya. I’m ’bout gettin’ them dollars.”

  “I feel you,” Mike said as he pulled out his key to unlock the front door.

  We stepped inside and then headed straight to the sliding-glass door that led out to the patio. Dank had already fired up the grill and was about to throw some steaks on that bitch. My mouth watered just thinking about it.

  “’Sup, Dank?” I greeted him.

  He looked up at me with a Bud Light in his hand. “Sup, cuzzo? You want a beer?”

  “Hell yeah,” I replied.

  He reached in a cooler, grabbed a beer, and passed it to me. “The bitches are on the way,” Dank announced.

  “Oh, hell yeah,” Mike said with a smile.

  I wasn’t really in the mood to be surrounded by chickenheads. One thing I knew about my cousins was that they liked the same type of bitches I had once been into. Those ratchet-ass broads who didn’t know the first thing about being domestic, had no ambition, worshipped the Kardashians and Beyoncé, loved to post pictures on Instagram, were saving up for butt shots, and constantly twerked for attention.

  For some reason, that shit had been appealing to me at first. Maybe that was because I hadn’t wanted to commit. My attraction to that type of woman had only been my way of avoiding something serious. If I’d always gone after women like Daisha, I probably would’ve fallen in love a long time ago.

  “Is that ho Rain comin’?” Mike asked Dank.

  “Hell yeah. She wanna fuck you bad as hell, Pistol. That’s all that ho talk about.” Dank laughed as he put the top of the grill down.

  “Who the fuck is Rain?” I asked. That name wasn’t familiar to me.

  “That ho that was tryin’a fuck you the first night you came over here. You remember that ho, nigga. She’s a redbone with a short Halle Berry cut and shit. Her ass is fat as hell, but shawty’s breath be funky than a mu’fucka.” Mike laughed and lit up another stinky-ass cigarette.

  I remembered exactly who they were talking about. It needed to rain in that bitch’s mouth, because it smelled like she’d sucked several dicks right before licking several assholes. The bitch was fine, but that shit only got a bitch so far when she couldn’t even breathe around a nigga. That ho needed to stop breathing all together, and when I fucked with a chick, I needed her to be alive and well.

  “I wish you’d quit them mu’fuckas, and I ain’t tryin’a fuck that yuck-mouth, dragon-breath bitch. Y’all can go on wit’ that shit. I ain’t impressed by that ho’s fat ass. That shit’s just more funk to add to her breath. You know if she don’t brush her teeth, she don’t wash her ass.”

  Dank and Mike fell out in a fit of laughter.

  “You one funny-ass nigga. Shit, I’d bend that thick bitch over and push her guts through her mouth,” Mike stated.

  “Shit, I’d fuck that bitch and hold my fuckin’ breath. She can suck a dick. That’s why her mouth smell like that. That ho be lettin’ niggas bust in her mouth twenty-four-seven,” Dank added for good measure.

  “Well, if she sucked your dick, that explains her stankin’-ass mouth,” I joked.

  Mike pounded me up, while Dank pretended to be mad.

  “Good one, my nigga,” Mike said.

  “That’s fucked up, cuz,” Dank asserted.

  “You know I’m fuckin’ wit’ you,” I said. I had to smooth it over since that nigga was cooking. “I just want my steak before that broad gets here. I don’t want her breathin’ over my food.”

  We all laughed again as I rolled up a much-needed blunt full of that strong-ass gas.

  Two hours later, there was a bunch of people over at Mike’s house, enjoying the free food, alcohol, and weed. The niggas were hooting and hollering, enjoying the sight of half-naked bitches who were glad to flaunt and pop it for a so-called real nigga. Me, though, I wasn’t impressed. Instead, I was wondering why the hell Daisha still wasn’t answering her damn phone.

  “Damn. Why you bein’ all antisocial and shit?” That chick Rain was all up in my face once again as I sat in a chair on the patio.

  I was trying my best not to cuss her out, but she was fucking annoying me. That ho had been trying to get me to talk to her ever since she arrived, but I had been ignoring the hell out of her ass. Why didn’t she get the damn point?

  “I ain’t antisocial, yo. I just don’t wanna socialize wit’ you. You been in here this whole time rubbin’ your ass on every nigga in this room. What the fuck you think we got to talk about?” I stood up and pulled out my cell phone to call Daisha again.

  “Oh, so you all that, huh?” She was still all up in my personal space and shit. It was clear that she was drunk and probably fucked up on some other shit, like Molly. Her body movements were all erratic and shit as she lunged at me.

  “Somebody better come get this ho ’fore I punch her in her funky-ass mouth,” I yelled.

  Next thing I knew, there was chaos. Old girl started throwing whatever she could get her hands on at me. Why was she mad because I didn’t want to fuck with her?

  “Fuck wrong wit’ you, Ma? You ain’t gotta be actin’ like that ’cause I don’t want you to suck my dick. I’m good on that,” I said firmly.

  Two chicks who must’ve been her homegirls were holding her back as she went off. “Fuck you, nigga! I would’ve turned you out, anyway! Ain’t nah bitch got shit on me!” Veins were sticking out on her neck as they led her out the front door.

  All I could do was shake my head. What the hell was wrong with the women I’d been in contact with lately? They all seemed to be losing their minds. It was time for me to go. I was high as hell, and I was nice and full. I had my ride and the information I needed. And the spot was getting even more crowded, so that was my cue to leave. I also had to find out what the hell was going on with Daisha. Had she run off again?

  “I’m ’bout to head on out,” I told Mike and Dank.

  “Word, my nigga? Damn. We got some strippers on the way. They get down and dirty too,” Mike said.

  They had no clue about Daisha and the fact that I wasn’t interested in any woman other than her. I decided to leave them in the dark about it.

  “I’m good on that. I seen enough strippers to last me a damn lifetime.”

  “Word. Well, do you, my nigga. I’m gon’ watch them bitches pussy pop, and then I’m gon’ pop some pussy!” Mike laughed and slapped me five.

  I pretended to be impressed, but I wasn’t. Fuck what he was talking about. The only thing on my mind was Daisha. Had that nigga Rae tracked her down? Maybe he thought she had something to do with his son’s mom getting murdered. That shit made my heart drop.

  “A’ight, nigga. I’m gone,” I said.

  I pounded Dank up and headed out
the front door to my car. There was a sinking feeling in my chest, and something told me that shit just wasn’t right. Something was in the air, and I had no idea what it was or what it meant. The only thing I knew was that shit couldn’t be good.

  Chapter 15

  Daisha

  Being that I wasn’t in the mood for drama, I realized that I should’ve followed my first instinct. It wasn’t the usual day that Kevia got her hair done, so I hadn’t expected to see her here. She was talking to Tonia while I sat under the hooded dryer, trying to remain incognito.

  When I saw Tonia look in my direction, with a smile on her face, I knew that incognito shit was in vain. Shit, I should’ve known better. Tonia had been doing our hair for years and knew that we were supposed to be best friends. The thing was, at that moment, I didn’t know what was going to go down. Then I thought about the fact that G was dead. I had no clue what mood Kevia would be in.

  Kevia wore a scowl as she walked in my direction. My guard went up immediately, and I was prepared for whatever. Her last words to me were, “This shit ain’t over,” so if I had to whup that ho’s ass, then so be it. It wasn’t like she had her big, bad brother G to hide behind anymore. She couldn’t whup my ass, anyway. We’d fought plenty of times over the years. That was when we were younger, though. Kevia was a little taller and a lot thicker than me. That didn’t matter, though. In my eyes, the bigger they were, the harder they’d fall.

  Kevia sat down at the empty dryer beside me. I just stared at that bitch like she’d lost her mind. What the hell was she trying to prove, anyway?

  I read her lips as she attempted to apologize. “I’m so sorry ’bout what happened, Punkin. Rae’s crazy as fuck. I know that he don’t give a fuck ’bout nobody but himself now. The nigga got mad ’cause I didn’t get you to stick around to talk to him, and slapped me in my damn face.”

  I lifted the dryer up so I could hear her better.

  She continued. “I know you put that gun to my head because you were afraid of what Rae would do. I know you wasn’t gonna shoot me. I was just mad at the time. Rae told me he was gonna kill you, but that was after he convinced me to get you to talk to him. I’m glad I ran into you. You’re my best friend, and I never meant to put my fucked-up-ass cousin before you. Please accept my apology.”