A Girl Called Hope

by A Girl Called Hope (retail) (epub)

  A month after her devastating meeting with the solicitor, she sat down and worked out her accounts. She had been very busy but it wasn’t enough. Without delving into Freddy’s twenty pounds it would be difficult to pay the coming month’s bills. And she still hadn’t paid back Stella’s loan. She had to look for something else. There were moments when she felt a real anger towards Ralph’s mother. Marjorie seemed unaware of the implications of his death, or determinedly refused to face them. But the moments of rage quickly faded with the thought that always followed: if she hadn’t insisted on Ralph leaving his mother’s house he might still be alive.

  She woke one morning to a strange noise. It sounded as though a tap had been left on, but there was no possibility of that. She would have heard it before this. An investigation quickly revealed that the bathroom was flooded and the running water she could hear was bubbling up through the floorboards and running down the stairs.

  She ran to the phone box at the end of the lane, with Davy still in his pyjamas and a dressing gown covered by a coat, and called a plumber. The man promised to be there within half an hour. ‘Have you turned off the water?’ he asked and when Hope said she didn’t know how, he said. ‘I’ll be there as fast as I can.’

  On the way back to the house she stopped and called on Kitty and Bob. Bob came immediately and found the stop cock and the sudden cessation of noise was such a relief she whispered when she thanked him.

  The plumber quickly discovered the source of the trouble and replaced a pipe and joint that had been carelessly fitted. The resulting mess was hers to deal with. The stair carpet of which she had been so proud ruined. She pulled it free of its brass rods and threw it outside. Whether it would be possible to reuse it was very much in doubt. Then there was the cost of the plumber.

  Thoughts of Marjorie’s satisfaction saved her from prolonged melancholy. It would have to be replaced, the insurance might help; as for the rest, well, somehow she would earn it.

  In Stella’s window she saw a job vacancy at the Ship and Compass. It was for a cleaner and she knew that, unpleasant or not, if she could take Davy with her she would do it. Just until the plumber was paid and the stairs had some sort of cover on them. The landlady, Betty Connors, was doubtful, but was persuaded to take her on for a temporary period until she found someone else. Knowing Freddy, and fearing the wrath of Marjorie, she hoped no one would see the young woman doing such menial work.

  The previous cleaner had been far from enthusiastic and Hope found that the wooden floor in one bar and the slates in the other were in need of serious attention. This was not work she would look for again, but she knew that whatever she did she needed people to know that she did a good job, so she worked at the floors until every last stain was gone, finishing the wooden boards by scrubbing them with water to which she added bleach, and the result was very pleasing. Betty rewarded her with a bonus and the plumber got his money as soon as the bill was presented.

  For two weeks she went every morning to clean the two bars, and although the smoky, beer-scented atmosphere was not an ideal place for Davy, she was determined to do it for six weeks so she would have a little money behind her. Money was security and that was something she desperately needed.

  One morning as she was washing the last corner of the entrance steps a shadow loomed over her, and she looked up to see a man she didn’t know. He stood threateningly close, his feet not far from her wet and red hands holding the scrubbing brush. She sat back on her heels to see him better. ‘I’m sorry but we aren’t open until twelve o’clock,’ she said politely.

  ‘What on earth are you doing? Trying to humiliate your parents-in-law even further? Driving your husband to suicide, and now this? This show of poor little hard-done-by widow?’

  She jumped up, pushing a hand ineffectually through her untidy hair. She was hot and her flushed cheeks gave a glow to her eyes in which anger flared. ‘Who are you?’ she demanded. ‘How dare you insult me!’

  ‘I’m Ralph’s friend Matthew Charles, and I’ve just heard of his cruel and lonely death.’

  ‘Then you must also know that the reason I’m here isn’t to shame his mother but to feed myself and his son. He left us without a penny.’

  ‘That isn’t what I heard.’

  ‘It’s the truth. Now please leave, I want to finish the work I’m paid for.’

  ‘Is everything all right, Hope?’ the landlady asked from inside the door.

  ‘Yes, of course,’ Hope replied, pushing the man roughly off the step and fastidiously scrubbing the spot on which he had stood.

  ‘Another friend of dear Marjorie Murton, I presume?’ Betty Connors said loudly. ‘I remember Matthew Charles. He and Phillip were two of the most unpleasant—’ She stopped and waved as Freddy appeared.

  Freddy went into the bar but was waiting when Hope finished work. ‘Please, Hope dear. Use the money I gave you and give up on this. Concentrate on the garden and your sewing. Marjorie would be most upset if she sees you working here, and little Davy with you.’

  She refrained from shouting good, and instead said firmly, ‘I have no one to help me, Father-in-law, and I need to keep the house. I’ll do whatever I have to. I won’t let it go.’

  ‘I’m so sorry,’ he said, and she hugged him and assured him that it was only for a few weeks, until things improved. ‘I had a flood and the plumber had to be paid. I won’t get into debt while there’s a way I can earn money.’

  ‘I thought you had sewing work.’

  ‘I do, but a few weeks of this job and I’ll have a few pounds put by. I still have the afternoons for Davy and the evenings for sewing. It won’t be for ever. Although,’ she said with a sad smile, ‘sometimes is seem as though it will be. I look into a future that’s unlikely to change for the better. How can it?’

  ‘The only thing that’s predictable about life is that it’s unpredictable,’ he said with an encouraging smile. ‘Who knows what tomorrow will bring?’

  ‘Do you know a man called Matthew Charles?’ she asked him.

  ‘Phillip had a friend of that name.’

  ‘And you haven’t seen him lately?’

  ‘No, but he might have called to see Marjorie, she said something about a friend calling having heard the news. She asked him to contact Phillip and tell him to come home, but we’ve heard nothing.’

  ‘There’s no doubt that he’s seen Mother-in-law! He’s been to see me, too, criticized me rather unpleasantly. Tell him to stay away from me will you? Or I might just talk to the police about slander, and that would upset someone other than Matthew Charles,’ she said pointedly.

  ‘Give her time, Hope. She’s very distressed.’

  ‘And what about me? Am I not allowed to be upset? Losing my husband and possibly my home? Left practically penniless? Having to clean in a public house? A place I’ve never before even entered?’

  ‘I’ll have a word with Matthew, and try again to warn Marjorie about her behaviour.’

  ‘Perhaps you could remind her that Davy is her grandchild? Perhaps you could ask her what will happen to him if we are made homeless? Will I be accused of allowing that to happen too? Just to embarrass her?’

  ‘Ralph didn’t just die, he killed himself, Hope dear. It will never be all right for her.’

  ‘Nor me! I was abandoned in the most incomprehensible way. I’ve lost my husband, and instead of receiving sympathy I am accused of causing his death.’

  He walked to the bus stop with her, pushing Davy in his pushchair, and got on the bus with them. He paid their fare and gave Davy a threepenny piece to buy sweets. ‘There are no sweet coupons left until next month,’ Hope reminded him sullenly.

  ‘An ice-cream?’

  Aware of his attempts to help and how uncomfortable he felt caught between herself and his wife, while he was himself grieving, she touched his arm and thanked him. ‘I get very angry at times, but I’m grateful for your support,’ she assured him.

  Freddy didn’t go straight home. He went to see
Geoff Tanner at the hardware shop.

  ‘Did you know that Hope had a flood?’ he asked. ‘A faulty bit of plumbing in the bathroom. She’s had it fixed but she’s scrubbing floors in the Ship and Compass to pay for it.’ His anger showed. As the landlord he should have dealt with it and paid for the repair, not allowed Hope to arrange it.

  ‘I’m sorry, Mr Murton, I didn’t know. Why didn’t she come to me? As the landlord it’s my problem when something goes wrong.’

  ‘Perhaps you can go and see her.’

  ‘Of course. As soon as the shop closes.’

  When Geoff found out what had happened he insisted on paying the plumber and for the cleaning of the carpet, which was still rolled up in a shed.

  ‘Please,’ he said once everything was agreed and Hope’s savings had increased encouragingly, ‘please let me know if there are any problems. I don’t want your father-in-law telling me off, however politely he does it.’

  Hope ran to tell Kitty what had happened and while she was there, asked, ‘Do you know anyone who’d like Davy’s pram? Davy walks well now, and I’ve the pushchair for when he’s tired. I’ll gladly give it to someone who wants it.’

  ‘Sell it,’ Kitty said. ‘Don’t give it away. For one thing it’ll be more valued if someone has to pay and for another you have to think money. You can’t give away a good pram and then go and scrub floors in the Ship and Compass. Where’s your sense, girl?’

  A young woman agreed to buy the pram but she needed it delivered. It was the greengrocer, Peter Bevan, who solved that problem. He lifted it on to the cart behind his patient horse, and with Hope and Davy sitting beside him delivered it to the other side of Cwm Derw. Davy pointed at all the vehicles on the road and the animals in the fields and Peter stopped as they approached their destination and allowed him to ride on the back of the horse. The little boy’s blue eyes were round with delight and he patted the rough coat, safely supported by Peter’s protective arms.

  When Hope offered Peter some money to pay him, he pushed it aside, holding her hand for an unnecessarily long moment, and said, ‘I should be paying you for the entertainment. I don’t think young Niblo has stopped talking for more than a few seconds and I’ve enjoyed every minute. You don’t have any more prams needing delivering, I suppose? Pity. Well, if you ever need me, just give me a call.’ He offered a hand to Davy and said, ‘Cheerio, young Dai. See you soon, eh?’

  Dai? Hope repeated as they went inside. What would Marjorie think of that!

  Marjorie came to see Hope the following day, and when she opened the door to her, holding Davy by the hand, Hope began to smile a welcome as she stood back to allow her to enter.

  ‘You are embarrassing me and Ralph’s father, and shaming Ralph’s memory.’

  ‘Because I’m working to stay clear of debts?’

  ‘Scrubbing in a public house. Wandering around the lanes on a horse and cart with a strange man. What are you thinking of?’

  ‘Staying clear of debts,’ Hope repeated calmly. ‘Will you come in? Davy has some drawings he’d like to show you.’

  ‘Leave this house. It’s too big. You must find something smaller and easier to run.’

  ‘Far away so you don’t have to see me struggle to keep us fed and clothed?’

  ‘Just go, find something less humiliating to do with your life.’

  ‘Oh no, I can’t leave here. It’s our home. Remember, Mother-in-law, if you had supported us, or if Ralph hadn’t been so cowardly, acted so – so irresponsibly, I wouldn’t be scrubbing floors, would I?’

  It was the first time she had dared to accuse Ralph aloud, and she felt both frightened and brave. She immediately regretted it. She felt only sadness as Marjorie turned and hurried back down the path to the lane. What good would it do to upset Marjorie? The poor unhappy woman had suffered enough. Tomorrow she would go to her and apologize, let her rain more of her anger and hatred on her head. She would deserve it for what she had just said.

  *

  Winter ended and the air was filled with birdsong and the occasional sound of lawnmowers being pushed up and down on sunny days. Everywhere was the scent of blossom, and the earth, freshly turned, gave out its special smell, which Hope found exciting, filled with the promise of better things. It was the month of May and the glory of the fully leafed trees made every view a picture to be admired. Whatever happened, she knew she had made the right decision by staying in Badgers Brook.

  As the days lengthened every moment was filled with sewing for the large number of weddings the coming months would bring. She was cheaper than most gown shops and her styles were individual, never seen more than once, as the designs were mostly her own. She still painted boxes and chairs and the occasional small table, and she learned to add colour to plain picture frames with sealing wax, a candle and a needle. Anything to earn a few shillings.

  Peter called often and helped transport some of the furniture on which she was asked to use her skills. He sometimes stayed for supper, occasionally bringing a rabbit stew he had prepared, which Kitty and Bob would be invited to share. Peter, Freddy and Bob spent hours in the vegetable patch, laughing and talking while keeping the weeds at bay. She knew Freddy called in to the Ship and Compass on the way home and hoped Marjorie didn’t complain at the way he chose to fill the still painful hours.

  Only Betty Connors knew that Freddy also visited the bridge from where his son had fallen to his lonely death. She sometimes went there with him after the pub closed, leaving the pot man to clean the bar. They stood and she listened while Freddy reminisced about the boys’ childhood.

  The garden was still Hope’s solace, and with Freddy’s expert help the vegetables flourished. In July the enormous harvest of runner beans reached the picking stage. Bob made her a small cart out of pram wheels and a wooden box and, embarrassed at first, but with growing confidence, she began knocking on doors and selling them. Onions were harvested in August, and lettuce and a mountain of tomatoes had filled the greenhouse, which Freddy and Bob had now extended along the shed wall.

  The money flowed in and she worked long into the evenings. After nearly three months, longer than she had anticipated, and partly because Marjorie didn’t like it, she finally gave up cleaning at the Ship and Compass.

  After her final morning there, an irate knock at her door made her expect to see Marjorie’s angry face, but it was the face of a stranger. An angry stranger. A man in his sixties, well dressed in a smart overcoat and three-piece suit, well polished shoes and a smart hat. He looked prepared to meet trouble.

  ‘Can I help you?’ she asked politely, tightening her hold on Davy’s hand as he tried to wriggle out of her grasp.

  ‘My son helped you when you needed it and now you’re stealing his business.’

  ‘I’m sorry, but will you please explain what you mean?’

  ‘My son, Peter Bevan. Heard of him, have you? He has a vegetable and fruit round and you’re stealing his customers, selling before he arrives, door to door. I should report you, but Peter isn’t vindictive, so I’m just warning you, stop selling your garden produce cheap. Got it?’

  He didn’t wait for a reply, just turned and hurried back down the path.

  Hope sighed. How many more people would storm off down her path in anger? An hour later there was another knock at the door and this time she didn’t automatically prepare a smile.

  ‘Peter! I’ve just seen your father and I’m very sorry. I didn’t think what I was doing would affect your business.’

  ‘I’ve come to apologize. Dad means well but he shouldn’t have called on you.’

  ‘Will you come in?’

  Davy heard him and ran from the kitchen, calling excitedly, ‘Peter, did you bring the horse, can I have another ride? Will you come and see my painting? It’s a picture of your horse Jason and the cart.’

  Peter shrugged, grinned at her and said, ‘First things first. Come on then, young Dai, where’s this picture? It had better be good or Jason will be offended, mind.’ />
  The painting, a blur of black and browns with the sun shining in a top corner, was duly admired, then placed on the kitchen table for Peter to take with him.

  ‘There’s always a sun shining in his pictures,’ Hope told him. ‘Unrecognizable shapes which he sees as his favourite things and the sun shining in the top corner. Or faces wearing wide smiles.’

  ‘I suppose that means he’s happy. He certainly seemed to me to be very contented with his life. A happy lad, aren’t you, Dai?’

  ‘Will you bring the horse when you come again? And will you play trains with me?’

  ‘All right, trains it is, and tomorrow, when I go past, I’ll call and if your mam isn’t busy I’ll give you a ride. Right?’

  There was no answer; Davy was already bottom up, elbows going like pistons, searching in his toy box for his trains.

  Peter was easily persuaded to stay for a meal, which Hope always ate with Davy, now there was no one else to worry about his rather flamboyant attitude to table manners. Peter didn’t seem to mind the occasional mess and the meal was happier than most.

  The day had been warm, and after Davy had been put to bed they sat in the garden for a while. Kitty and Bob arrived, and seeing Peter there Bob went home for a flagon of beer. Hope made some toast with Marmite and prepared a few sandwiches of salad with grated cheese she had been saving for the following day’s supper. The impromptu party relaxed them and they talked late into the evening.

  As the day ended, with the twittering of birds and the occasional call of a vixen, the alarming sound of a cat fight, the distant murmur of people strolling home along the lane, talking and laughing, no one wanted to move. For the first time in months, Hope felt at peace.