He gently pulled her hands from her face. The unshed tears in her eyes almost unmanned him. She was confused, especially because she did not understand.
“There is nothing wrong with your behavior, Cordelia. It is natural.”
She sniffed then looked away. “I really fear that I have turned into my mother.”
She said it with such disgust that he felt the need to ease her worries. Nico knew he could not tell her everything. If he were to reveal all to Cordelia, she would panic and run. He would follow, that much he was sure of.
He tightened his grip on her hands. “Look at me.” He waited until she lifted her gaze to his. “There is nothing wrong with you for wanting me. Do not ever think less of yourself.”
She did not look convinced.
“Tell me this. When you see Malik, do you want him to touch you?”
She actually looked repulsed by the idea. Then she smoothed her expression. “Oh, it is not because he is…from somewhere else.”
“I know. What I was alluding to is that you have these feelings for me. You have been in society for a long time, Cordelia.”
She frowned. “Not that long.”
He smiled at the indignation in her voice. He knew he had hit a nerve. “Tell me, have you ever had a chance to be compromised?”
She sighed. “No.”
“Do not doubt the attraction we have for one another. It is good to be this way with your chosen mate.”
She studied him for a moment then nodded. “I think I better step out now or we will cause another scandal.”
A sense of satisfaction filled him. He might not have wanted a mate, but he had chosen well. He lifted her hands and kissed them.
“But of course.”
* * * *
Cordelia looked out over the street from her sister’s bedroom window. She had not slept. She could not. She had felt relieved when she first returned home. After checking on her sister, who was sleeping peacefully, she had changed into her nightdress, slipped into bed exhausted, but found herself unable to sleep.
She had thought she would be too tired to even dream, but she found herself staring at the canopy of her bed. After several wasted hours, she decided to go to Diana's room to watch over her.
Cordelia glanced at her sister's still form. It had been years since she had seen Diana suffer from the headaches. She had assumed she had grown out of them, but now she wondered if Diana had just kept herself in the country because of them.
With a sigh, she looked out over the street again. The sun was just starting to peek over the tops of the houses. The only people she saw were workers hurrying to their jobs for the morning. She was a person happy with her own counsel. Groups of people had always made her nervous. Once Diana had left home, she had spent most of her days by herself. Occasionally, one of the staff would take pity on her and entertain her, but that was not so often. The only reason she had gone out in society was necessity. To eat she had to learn to overcome her misgivings. Truthfully, she would not have a problem abandoning it if she didn't need the money. She always felt hemmed in when she dealt with society. The rules had always been something she never agreed with. Why was it acceptable for her father to have dozens of paramours, but not her mother? But that had not been what had bothered her as much as the feeling of restlessness that moved through her every time she stepped into a ballroom.
And now she had the embarrassing situation of needing Nico. It had taken her a good hour of thinking to realize the reason she was feeling out of sorts was because Nico was not there. He drove her insane with his attitude and his kisses, but there was something in her that resonated with him when he was near. It was as if he soothed her in a way no one else could.
And that thought had scared her. Needing a man was not a position she ever wanted to be in. She had seen what it had done to her sisters.
"Cordelia?" her sister asked weakly.
She rushed to her side and was happy to see that while her sister looked confused, she no longer looked to be in pain.
She hesitated when she reached the bedside then threw caution to the wind and sat on the mattress.
"How are you feeling?"
She sighed and leaned back against the pillows. "Better, though I feel as if I am walking through a fog."
Cordelia nodded, remembering that after an attack, her sister usually spent the day that followed in bed.
"You needed rest from your trip."
Diana glanced at the window.
"Do you mind pulling the curtains shut? My eyes are still sensitive to light."
Cordelia nodded and did as she was bid.
"Did you wait all night here?"
Cordelia shrugged. "I could not sleep."
"Thank you."
She glanced back over her shoulder at her sister. "I thought you did not have spells anymore?"
"Not often. I fear you are correct about the traveling, though."
"You never did learn to slow down when you started feeling bad."
They looked at each other, the room filled with unspoken memories. It was hard to be so formal with her sister now. When she had been growing up, Diana was the one person she shared everything with. Until she left.
"Yes, but you need your sleep. Whatever Mrs. Blackburn gave me last night worked apparently. I do not remember anything after she gave me the concoction to drink. You did not need to watch over me."
The admonition had Cordelia straightening her back. "I apologize. I will leave you alone."
She was almost to the door when Diana stopped her. "Cordelia."
She turned and faced her sister.
Diana gave her a weak smile. "Thank you."
Cordelia nodded and slipped out the door. One of the maids was waiting in the hallway. "I think you need to get my sister some tea and just a bit of bread this morning."
She curtseyed and ran to do Cordelia's bidding. Cordelia made her way to her room. If she had hoped that Diana and she would forge a new relationship, she would have been disappointed. But for the most part, she had not expected it. If anything, she had expected her sister to notify her brother of her situation. She shut the door behind her and leaned against it for a moment.
Cordelia stood there trying to understand her problem with sleeping. She had not had a good night’s rest in two nights. First, the worry of being compromised. Then, last night. It could have been the surroundings that kept her awake. Cordelia did not do well in new surroundings. Before leaving her family's estate to come to London, she’d only left there on occasion during her childhood. She was truly a country mouse, one who could care less about the city. But it had been a necessity. Her brother's drinking was getting out of hand. Not to mention the parties he was throwing. The earl had been bad, but nothing like the debauchery her brother was now hosting on the estate. There was a time or two she had worried not only about her virtue, but sometimes her life.
She brushed the unpleasant memories away and walked to her bed. She would try to sleep, but she was not sure it would come. The moment she slipped into bed, her muscles relaxed, her mind easing. She was almost asleep when she thought she felt arms wrap around her. The warmth surrounded her, and her body drifted off to sleep...but not before she registered the scent of bay rum.
* * * *
Nico settled on the bed next to Cordelia. He knew he was breaking rules. As usual, he didn't care. Truthfully, he wasn't quite sure what he thought he was going to do when he snuck into the house. It had been embarrassingly easy, but it usually was for him. Humans saw only what they wanted.
All he knew is he needed to be there. Even as his body yearned for release he knew would not come, he felt a strange comfort move through him.
He had spent the night talking to Malik, then pacing his own room. Then, at dawn, he had given up. He'd walked to her sister's townhouse.
"Nico?" she asked sleepily.
He froze. "Yes, love."
"Oh, good."
Then she relaxed completely into sleep with a
small smile on her face. He glanced at the door, noting that she had locked it when she came in. Something most women of her station would never do, but he had a feeling he knew why.
He wanted to beat the bloody hell out of everyone in her family, but he let it go. Instead he settled his head back down on the pillow, sighed with contentment, and drifted into sleep with her.
* * * *
Cordelia came awake slowly. She stretched her arms over her head. She could not believe how fast she had fallen asleep after going to bed. Two sleepless nights had apparently caught up to her. She shifted her leg and hit something…another leg. A scream vibrated in her throat when a hand slipped over her mouth. She noted the scent of bay rum, and she knew then it was Nico in her bed.
“I would suggest you do not alert the entire household,” he said, his mouth pressing against her ear. “Our announcement just hit the papers. More gossip would be very trying.”
She nodded, and he released her. She slipped out of bed and frowned at him. His hair was a mess, and he had a day’s growth of beard.
“What in heaven’s name are you doing here?”
His gaze slid over her, slowly working its way down her body then back again. She realized she was wearing her plain nightdress, but it was definitely easy to see through. Heat filled her face as she grabbed her robe. After slipping it on, she felt better. The smirk he gave her told her it didn’t matter.
“Are you going to answer me?”
He sat up, and she realized then he was bare chested. She was mesmerized. She had never seen a man up close and almost naked. His chest was broad and muscled, with a spattering of hair over his golden flesh. The hair trailed down his stomach. When she found herself wondering just how far the trail went, she blushed and glanced up at his face. He was smiling.
“If you are going to look at me like that, you better get back in the bed.”
Her face got even hotter.
“I will repeat. What are you doing here?”
He sighed then mumbled something.
“What?”
“I couldn’t sleep.”
She blinked at the anger she heard simmering in his voice.
“You couldn’t sleep, so you broke into my sister’s townhouse? You are not making any sense.”
He looked as if he wanted her to shut up. When he stood, she covered her eyes.
He chuckled. “I’m wearing trousers.”
She peeked through her fingers and dropped her hands as soon as she realized he was telling the truth.
“So, you broke in here to sleep with me? Wearing your trousers?”
He said nothing as he slipped on his shirt.
“Nico.”
He glanced at her. “First, I told you. I could not sleep. I went out for a walk and found myself at your sister’s door. Secondly, I was wearing my trousers because if I had been naked, you would not be standing there complaining to me.”
Irritation slapped her hard. He was in her room, without invitation, and he had the nerve to sound aggravated with the conversation?
She settled her hands on her waist. “And just what do you think would happen?”
“You would be beneath me moaning my name,” he said in a near shout.
For a moment, she could not think. His shirt was still gaping open, and he had started to stalk her. She felt her eyes widen as she stepped back.
“I-I think you should leave now.” Even as she said it, her stomach threatened to revolt.
“Do you?” he asked as she came up against the wall.
“Y-yes.”
He slapped his palms against the wall on either side of her head.
“I think you don’t. In fact, I can hear your heart beat. I know that right now, heat is rushing through your blood.”
He nuzzled her neck much as he had the night before in the carriage. She thought she felt a scrape of his teeth, and she shuddered.
“Good God, woman, you have no idea what you are doing to me. I cannot sleep, I cannot feed…I need you so badly.”
She barely heard the words. His voice had dipped lower, and his breath heated her flesh. Never in her life had she felt this from anyone. A completely delectable man wanted her, needed her, he said. Something unfurled in her belly as heat shot through her blood just as he said.
She turned her head and met his lips. It was so delicious, kissing, feeling the way his tongue darted into her mouth. He kissed her as if she were the only nourishment he needed. Slowly, she lifted her hands to his shoulders. She slipped her fingers beneath his shirt and laid her palms on his skin. He was hot, as if he were burning with fever.
He muttered against her mouth and deepened the kiss. Over and over he thrust his tongue into her mouth. She wanted this, needed to feel his skin next to hers. Something in her seemed to rejoice the moment she felt the bit of teeth against her tongue. Her mouth still hurt from where he had bit it the night before, but she didn’t care.
It was primal, she knew that. Any other time she would be embarrassed or ashamed, but with Nico, she seemed not to care. Instead, she felt her body urging her to take, to be taken. She pressed against him.
Then, just as she was about to demand satisfaction—although she had no idea what that meant—there was a knock at her door.
“Lady Cordelia?”
She recognized the butler’s voice.
Nico growled as he pulled himself back from her.
“Yes?”
“There is a Mrs. Blackburn downstairs. She said she is your intended’s mother and that she wants to talk with you.”
Nico had rested his forehead against her shoulder, and he cursed under his breath but she could make out the words.
“Tell her I will be down shortly.”
“I think you should tell her to go away,” Nico whispered, his mouth against her ear.
“Lady Cordelia?” the butler said.
“I will be ready in a few moments.”
She could sense he hesitated, but he finally left. When she heard his retreating footsteps, she let out a sigh.
“Why did you say you would be downstairs?”
She looked at Nico, who was now staring at her. His gaze was hot. Her body responded to what she saw there. She wanted him, needed him, just as he apparently needed her.
“I cannot tell your mother to go away.”
“Then I will,” he said and spun away from her.
“Nico!” she grabbed his shirttails. “You cannot go down there and tell your mother to leave. This isn’t your house.”
He leaned his head against the door and took two long breaths.
“All right. I will accept that.” He turned to face her. “I will wait one more day. That is it, Cordelia.”
He stuffed his shirt into his trousers, slipped his boots on, then his jacket.
“How do you plan on escaping unnoticed?”
He said nothing for a moment, then he stepped forward and kissed her. It was long, wet, and she sagged against him when he was done. Then he stepped back and grabbed his walking stick.
“One more night.” He opened the French doors to her terrace.
“What are you doing?”
“I am going out the way I came in.” He climbed up onto the stone railing. “Tonight is the last night I sleep alone. You make the choice. You can do it as my fiancée or my wife.”
Then he stepped back off the railing. A scream strangled her as she rushed forward. When she reached the edge, she saw him below in her sister’s garden. He gave her a cocky salute, and then turned to walk away.
Her heart was still beating hard against her breast, and she felt a little lightheaded. Cordelia watched him until he turned the corner, then she sagged against the railing.
“Bloody hell,” she whispered as she closed her eyes. “What have I gotten myself into?”
Chapter Eight
Nico stepped into the foyer of his townhouse, somewhat energized from his walk and the time spent with Cordelia. Even though they had not mated, their bodies were
already in tune with each other. It was normal since he had chosen her to be his mate, but he didn’t think it would happen so quickly. He was thinking about his wedding night as he turned the corner. He came to an abrupt halt. His father and Malik stood as if waiting for him. The expressions on their faces told him they knew where he had been.
“Nico, I believe your mother told you to stay away from your bride.”
Malik chuckled. “Your son has had a problem with her from the first.”
“Just what do you mean by that?” Nico asked.
“I have a feeling our friend means that if you could have controlled yourself to begin with, you would not be planning a wedding,” his father said.
“And I thought both you and mother were happy with that particular development.”
“Yes, but you have usually had better control of your needs than you have with your bride-to-be. It might be a good sign. I hope that your mother was able to take her out shopping today. The first feeding with a Carrier can be quiet tiring.”
“Nothing happened.”
His father’s eyebrows rose. “Indeed? I don’t think I asked.”
“You did not. Now, he is sounding rather defensive about his actions, which makes me think he is lying,” Malik said.
He looked from one man to the other, not even trying to hide his exasperation. “Do you truly think I would be here now if I had actually taken her? Give me at least the respect to know we would still be in bed.”
He brushed past them and into his study. It was midafternoon, too early for a drink. Well, if his mother had not been in residence it wouldn’t be, but Adelaide Blackburn had rules. One of them was no liquor before five in the evening. So, he would not drink. Although he desperately needed one. For the first time in his life, he suppressed the urge to ignore his mother’s rules. When he heard their footsteps following him, he fought the need to curse.
“Gray sent around a note saying that Hurst’s family was looking for him,” Malik said.
Needing to concentrate on anything other than the woman who was driving him insane at the moment, he turned his attention to that.
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