Ashes (The Firebird Trilogy Book 1)

by Stephanie Harbon

  My eyes widened involuntarily, my cool demeanour wavering. “I have to have a Protector with me? To go to a lesson?”

  It wasn’t the best thing to say, I realised. His face contorted in anger, I should have known how capricious his moods were, as volatile and transformative as the tide. So easily influenced…

  “Yes,” he burst, making me flinch. “You will have one every single time you leave this room. I do not trust you. Do not think me stupid, Daughter.”

  “Don’t call me that,” I blurted unthinkingly. “I’m not your Daughter.”

  Lynk didn’t speak for a long time. His flat black stare frightened me; his pupils seemed to devour his entire iris. He towered over me; intimidating enough to make me shrink back, coil away like a frightened snake.

  “I will call you whatever I please,” he bellowed, his face tearing apart, “I made you.” He roughly came forwards, yanking me by my hair, speaking furiously into my ear with a hissing cutting tone, “You belong to me.”

  “Get off me,” I yelled. My hands trembled as I felt my hair ripping out. I tried to get him off. Bloody hell, where was my Protector now?

  Eventually his tight grip loosened enough so that I could pull free. I guessed it wasn’t just my attitude that had made him so suddenly infuriated; that outburst had been building up over time. My hate for him rose in my throat like bile, coming up in bitter premeditated words.

  I glared at him, all pretences demolished. “I am not your weapon.” My voice was deadly cold and serious. “I am what I choose to be and what I choose is anything but what you are,” I said slowly, sounding much braver than I felt. I couldn’t allow him to see my fear; he fed off fear like some vindictive parasite. I shielded my eyes from his.

  He was breathing heavily. He brought his hand up to smack it hard across my face. Despite the dizzying pain I somehow managed to stay upright. Ouch, that would bruise. He came forwards again, I staggered back out of the way but he pushed me down onto the bed, grabbing my throat and pressing his thumb hard into my windpipe.

  I choked, coughing as my airways cut off. I struggled under his grasp, fighting to get away. I couldn’t breathe, I was trapped. I kicked at him in feeble desperation, just clipping his knee. He didn’t like that.

  He reared back, releasing my throat and before I even managed to gasp a shaky breath he was punching me. His fist connected with my eye, just above my cheekbone; blinding me momentarily. I screamed in pain, trying to get away. I shuffled back impulsively but he grabbed me in a vicious snare and hit me again, this time just lower on my cheekbone.

  I’d had enough. The pain and adrenaline forced out my instincts, and when I spoke I unleashed the full potential of my voice on him. “You’re a monster,” I told him darkly, feeling the waves of immense power saturating my voice “but I am not afraid of you. Get off me, Lynk.”

  I felt the sound search him, locking onto him like target. It stunned him momentarily, but he was too strong to allow such feeble access.

  When he recovered, he spoke silkily with no traces of the hereditary Chyun’ju I’d just used at all. “You haven’t seen anything yet,” he told me, a serious warning glinting in his eyes. He walked across the room to leave. “And you won’t be having any more lessons from me. If you want training, they’ll be brought here, to our courtyard. You are not to leave the house.” He snapped before slammed the door like an overreacting teenager.

  The world went silent.

  Then I sunk down onto my bed.

  I could feel myself beginning to panic, my lungs hyperventilating uncontrollably. Everything just caught up with me. Furious tears rolled down my cheek.

  Frantically scrambling around, I searched for my old jewellery box. Opening it, sweet melodies twinkled in the air. I knew music was the best way to keep my head under control; to keep my spine from imploding in a fury of dangerous energy. The gentle rhythm and soft chiming sounds relaxed my muscles immediately. Music helped.

  I fell asleep listening to it.

  Two children sat high in a tree at the side of the great courtyard.

  “I told you I could beat you up here,” boasted the little girl. Her curling crimson hair was wrapped in a messy braid, some of the bright ringlets had escaped during the climb but her smile remained untouched.

  The little boy was slightly older than the girl, by a couple of years. His face was rounded and cute, his hair a mop of tight brown springs, and he had a lovely grin that seemed to stretch endlessly. His ragged clothes suggested he was the son of a slave. He poked the girl with a twig and objected, “Only because you kicked me!”

  The girl shook her head, those freeing curls falling across her little birdlike face like a lion’s mane. “I did not,” she protested absolutely, snapping off thin branch to poke her only friend back, “You must have mistaken a branch for my foot.”

  Now the boy was shaking his head, “Don’t be silly, trees don’t move.”

  “Some do,” she answered, gleaming. “I read it.”

  “Where?” inquired the boy. He wasn’t privileged enough to learn to read. His mother was a slave, and those directly descended from the Unchanged automatically become Slaves too; until their first fledged flight; if they Change; which is rare.

  “In a book,” she said. “Mother says there are all sorts of creatures past the mountains.”

  “We should go see them!” enthused the boy.

  “Yes,” agreed the girl excitedly. “We should-“

  But her words halted as the courtyard doors opened. The girl heard her father’s voice, sounding angry. Instantly she told the boy to be very quiet. He was.

  “What do you mean, ‘we have no time to get more slaves!’” he yelled at a slave who was obviously shaking with fear. The girl froze; she knew what father could be like when he was mad. She scrambled further back to conceal herself in leaves.

  The slave cowered backwards towards the fountain. “We cannot receive any more slaves to replace those we already have lost, my Lord. The High Council have not permitted it.” He shuddered apprehensively.

  Lynk looked down at the pitiful slave, speaking dangerously. “Find a way.”

  The slave looked terrified, he stuttered. “It is impossible, my Lord. What with all the slaves you send as messengers to the Barlayic soldiers,” he swallowed nervously, “and them being…eaten. Of course the High Council doesn’t know about… “

  But the Lord had had enough. In a burst of fury he ripped his blade from his belt and plunged it into the slave. The man cried out; falling into the fountain. Blood gushed into the water, turning it a gruesome red. The slave screamed in agony until Lynk brought up his sword again. This time the blade streaked across the slave’s neck, slicing mercilessly, severing his head from his body to silence his disturbing wails. The fountain ran with diluted blood.

  The boy in the tree couldn’t help it; he screamed.

  The girl instantly clasped her tiny hands across his mouth but it was too late.

  Lynk had heard.

  “Who’s there? Show yourself!” he shouted angrily, his powerful voice ringing out in a way that made the terrified boy start climbing down the tree. The girl wasn’t affected by her father’s voice, she never had been, but that didn’t stop the boy from automatically being mesmerised.

  She tried to yank him back but he’d already gone, in body and soul. The girl waited desperately as her friend edged towards her father. She prayed to the Mother.

  Her father gazed down at the little boy; knowing he’d heard too much. Raising the blade high, Lynk stabbed through the boy’s heart. The girl in the tree felt sick but she knew she couldn’t move; she couldn’t make a sound.

  Or she’d be next.

  I woke up gasping, tears streaming down my cheeks.

  Running my shaking hands across my face, I felt my head spin.

  The boy’s name was Reuben; I remembered now. He’d been my best and only friend for three years before that had happened. The other children had hated me, calling me only by the na
me ‘Siren’. They avoided me like the plague.

  I recalled that Lynk had later come to tell me, deceivingly apologetic, that Reuben had been killed by a mountain bear attack, though I’d known the truth. That was when I finally started to see Lynk for what he was, no longer deluded by a childish image that he was my father and I had to love him.

  There were some memories I’d rather remain forgotten.

  Getting out of the warm comfort of my bed, I stretched. If there was one good thing that came from that real nightmare, it was that I knew something. Barlayic Soldiers? Who were they, a different kind of Phoenix? I didn’t suppose it mattered very much. Kieran would know.

  I cringed, my heart thumping heavily at the thought of Kieran. I stared up at the ceiling, feeling utterly alone. It must have been early in the morning by now. Outside it was still dark; perhaps it was three, maybe four o’clock?

  I lay awake for a while, painfully thinking about Kieran and the way he had looked at me. Those beautiful, heartbreaking eyes staring straight at me in a way no one ever had. In that moment I’d felt nothing but pure elation. In all honestly it had been a surprise to me that it was Kieran I was feeling these emotions for, the most arrogant messed-up boy I know. My own brain had been hiding it from me. My body had known for ages. He barely looks at me and I shiver. The way he’d touched me, his fingers skimming my lips so delicately it was like a dragonfly over water, oh, and when he spoke my name; my name.

  I wanted to cry. Kieran didn’t want me and my father wanted to abuse me. I was trapped in a Palace surrounded by guards and a Protector intent on keeping me incarcerated. My only friends were miles away, and they weren’t even supposed to be friends with me. They wouldn’t be allowed to visit me here of course. I was completely alone. I missed my friends, my mother, my dog and most of all I missed Kieran. I needed his confident presence to make me feel safe, even if he didn’t want me. I was stupid to think he ever would, a short ginger thing like me; with him, the incarnation of Adonis? No way. I’ve seen the girls he can get. I didn’t have a prayer.

  A slow deep depression fell over me like a mist. I’d never felt so awful. I knew I had to get out of here, even if it was just to fly to clear my head. I just wanted to be alone; even from my own thoughts.

  I carefully stumbled out of bed; I was still wearing my clothes from earlier. I stretched, my spine twanging in protest. My face ached, a constant nagging sore that would intensify dramatically if touched. I glanced in the mirror on my way to the door. My eye was severely swollen, my cheek puffy on one side and already a shadow of a bruise was formulating. My neck was a horrid pinkish colour, purple finger-shaped marks already covering my throat. I exhaled painfully then tiptoed over to the door.

  Pressing my ear against the dark wood, I listened attentively, concentrating. I heard continuous breathing on the other side, two sets of lungs exhaling and inhaling in perfect synchrony; two awake guards. Damn. Then, thinking this, I wondered about the word awake. Perhaps I could put them to sleep. I think I’d read something like that in one of my borrowed books from the Library…

  I padded quietly to the desk where I’d left the old tattered books I’d borrowed. I checked a particular book, carefully separating the crinkled pages until I found what I was after. Scan-reading the page, I realised that yes, Chyun’ju could be used as a sedative, but no, it did not explain how.

  I paused again. Wait, I had done this before hadn’t I? Back home I’d sedated a whole pub of people. They’d been human; but it must’ve counted for something.

  Well, it was worth a shot. My mother used to sing a song if I couldn’t sleep, a lullaby in an ancient language I still didn’t recognise. I’d always drifted off immediately. Perhaps if I sung that it would do the same for me?

  Once again tiptoeing towards the door, I quietly began to sing my mother’s lullaby. The beautiful melody drifted through the door surreptitiously, slowly capturing the guard’s attention. I continued, my voice deep and soothing, until I heard their breathing slow even more. It was actually working. By the time I’d uttered the last lyric I was absolutely certain my guards were unconscious. Their chainsaw snores echoed loudly in the hall.

  I was still cautious as I turned the doorknob. Very slowly, the door creaked open. I glanced down to find my guards drunkenly sprawled across the floor. Cool, at least now I knew how to get out of my room at night. I didn’t know how long they would stay asleep so I quickly hurried. Clinging to the shadows, my worries were in vain; the halls were eerily silent and deserted.

  Heading out the back way into the gardens I noticed more guards in the distance. They were facing the opposite direction to me, searching for danger that attempted to enter; not escape. I crept silently around them, behind a trimmed hedge and down some stone steps. I was more concealed as I entered the wood-like garden. When I decided I was far enough away I Changed, leaving my clothes under a pile of rocks. I took off into the air, relief flooding into me. I’d actually made it.

  I flew in a dreamy state through the air. It was a cold night, a grey overcast hanging in anticipation above me, waiting for the perfect moment to scatter its frozen dust onto the earth. I headed thoughtlessly towards the mountains, my body impulsively taking me in directions my brain was unaware of.

  It wasn’t long until I realised I’d been unconsciously flying towards the Wall. I spotted it from a height then uncertainly landed before it. I edged closer nervously, and then kicked myself mentally, my subconscious voice reminding me that you shouldn’t fear the dead; it’s the living you need to watch out for. I still stayed a good few foot from the bodies though.

  The pregnant girl was still there, her body slightly more decayed but not as much as you might think because of the preserving icy weather. She must have once been so beautiful, was it really worth it? I wondered if she thought so. Staring at her I acquired a new mind set. If this was the consequence of being in a secret relationship with someone of a different Tribe then I doubt it was something I wanted. After all you can’t love anyone when you’re dead.

  Whatever had happened with Kieran and me would have to be forgotten. He was right, we weren’t meant to be together. I didn’t want to end up on that Wall beside her, my head marked eternally with my crime, despite how ridiculous a crime it seemed. My life was dangerous enough as it was without making things even more complicated for myself. Yes, I would just have to try and forget my feelings for him. That couldn’t be that difficult surely?

  With that in mind I headed back. I Changed and dressed when I returned, knowing that I would have to sneak back in. I froze when I heard someone coming my way and ducked behind a tree. I waited a moment, watching as they walked past. My heart stopped beating momentarily.

  All I saw was the back of the person and I knew immediately that something was very wrong. I saw wings, but not beautiful feathered wings, no, these were all wrong. Huge deformed wings they were, with grey skin like wet leather draped over twisted bony structures. The creature disappeared almost instantly into the forest, leaving me gaping, petrified, behind. What the hell was that?

  Scrambling up I rushed back, goose bumps coating my body now. I was terrified, what was that? I crept past the guards around the back of the Palace, ducking in through an open window when one of them nearly spotted me.

  Instead of bothering to look for any more excitement tonight, I followed the shadows quickly back to my room.

  The guards were still sound asleep on the floor when I got back so I slipped into my room, instantly immersing myself deep in my bed sheets. I wrapped the material walls around me again, but it was no use, I was too damn keyed up to sleep. I was, quite frankly, freaked out. I think I drifted to sleep twice and then woke up again, my heart hammering dramatically and sweat clinging to me.

  I was still awake when it was time to get up the next morning.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  The maids came in very early to wake me. I would have normally been extremely aggravated and grumpy at being made to get up before ele
ven, but they brought food with them, so it was more acceptable.

  “Is Lynk in today?” I wondered through a mouth of egg and toast.

  Ellie, the smaller and younger of the two, shook her head, “No Lady, he is with the High Council today. Would you like some orange juice?”

  I nodded, smiling appreciatively as she poured me some from a crystal jug. The other maid, whose name I’ve forgotten already, was laying out clothes on the bed. I glanced at them. Strong black trousers made from that scaly leather material and a loose shirt underneath a structured corset-like thing. The corset looked surprisingly comfortable, its function closer to armour than suffocation.

  I frowned at the clothes, swallowed a mouthful then asked politely, “What are those clothes for?” I gestured towards them with a pointed finger.

  “You are training today, Lady,” the other maid answered respectfully. This whole ‘Lady’ thing was starting to do my head in. “Jayson Wanowa is expected in half an hour. Your father made contact last night.”

  I frowned again, utterly confused. Why would Lynk ask Jayson to come here to train me? I knew he wouldn’t allow me out of the Palace any time soon, and I know he said that if I wanted training my teacher would have to come over here, but I never in a million years expected him to go out of his way to make it happen. Was it guilt after last night’s onslaught? I doubt it; there must be something in it for him.

  “Would you like a bath now, my Lady?” Ellie asked, abruptly dragging me from my thoughts, her black eyes carefully avoiding the bruises on my face.

  I shook my head, “I might as well wait till after training. I’m only going to get all hot and sweaty anyway.”

  “Would you like assistance getting dressed, my Lady?” wondered the other maid.

  “No, I’m fine,” I said, quite irritably. “And stop calling me ‘my Lady’. I am just the same as both of you. I don’t want to be treated any differently. Ignore Lynk and his superiority bullshit. You can do and say what you want with me.”