Starseed

by Gruder, Liz

  “Well?” Pia prodded.

  “I really like Jordyn. A lot.” There. She’d said it.

  “That’s no secret!” Pia laughed.

  But the things he’d allowed her to have memory of were secret. Kaila intuitively knew that she wasn’t supposed to talk about what she’d seen. The freezing of time. The implantation of screen memories of a skinned knee over what really happened. Making Mrs. Bourg and her students unconscious. She wanted to tell them, but if she did, they might think she was an alien and not like her anymore. Plus, she sensed that they did not want her to talk.

  “Let’s keep our pact,” Kaila said. “And you have my promise I’m going to get to the bottom of this.”

  “Thanks,” Melissa said, looking at Kaila gratefully with her lazy eye.

  “One thing,” Pia said. “Your mom and grandma might be on to something. The aliens seem real interested in you. If I were you, I’d keep wearing that stuff on your head.”

  Melissa added, “You never know who you can trust.” She blew on her bangs falling in her face. “And, um, do you think you could get some of that black stuff for our heads?”

  “Um.” Kaila considered. Her mother kept the Velostat hidden and only brought it out when she needed to cut fresh sheets. “I’ll see what I can do.”

  “Just a little bit is all we need … for night time,” Pia said. “That’s when they come for us.”

  Kaila sensed that the weekend would get stranger. Her mother, Lee, was teaching a yoga class in the parlor, a room that once housed a huge dining table covered with china and silver. Now the room was bare with mirrored walls and a wood floor, the crystal chandelier the only hint of the room’s former elegance.

  Seven people did downward dog on mats with Lee leading the class in front. Her mother wore a blue baseball cap with a navy scarf tied over it to keep it fixed to her head. Dreamy New Age sitar music lulled in the background.

  “Draw your navel in toward your spine. Breathe,” Lee instructed. “Reach up to heaven, inhale and forward fold,” she said, bending over, touching her mat. The class followed suit.

  Kaila looked at her dogs Lucy and Woofy, and put her finger to her lips. She quietly unrolled her sticky mat at the rear of the class. The dogs sat obediently next to her, pink tongues out, pleased to accompany her. Kaila bent, barefooted in her jeans shorts, placing her palms to the mat, inhaling deep, conscious breaths. She wore a headband on her wig to keep it secure.

  Though she often rolled her eyes with her mother’s infatuation with yoga, she did the classes because they made her feel better. Something about stretching and the deep breathing made her calm. She pushed her palms forward on the mat until she looked like an inverted “V.” She closed her eyes, taking deep breaths, enjoying the sensation of being upside down.

  My whole world is upside down.

  Stop thinking, she ordered. She had to stay centered like her mother and Mrs. Bourg had said. Yes, Mrs. Bourg had said to stay centered and in the present and not worry, hadn’t she? When was that?

  As Kaila stood to begin a sun salutation, she was surprised to see Priscilla Snowden standing in the doorway. Priscilla’s long blonde hair was in a ponytail. She wore black yoga pants and a sky-blue yoga top. She smiled at Kaila, unfolded her turquoise mat, and began doing sun salutations, her body limber and pliant.

  This is surreal, Kaila thought. But she smiled back at Priscilla, pleased she had come. How did she know her mother taught yoga classes here at home?

  She observed Priscilla performing the yoga poses expertly and fluidly. Though Priscilla didn’t look at her and practiced with her eyes closed, Kaila could feel her like a glowing sun. She felt her warmth, steadiness, and tranquility.

  Kaila closed her eyes and continued the asanas, doing inversions, twists, and later, shoulder stand, all the while conscious of Priscilla. Her muscles relaxed and grew fluid, feeling like she floated in a warm bath.

  “Now it is time for Savasana,” Lee said. “Corpse pose and meditation. Please lay on your backs, palms up.”

  Everyone lay on their backs, their eyes closed. This was the real reason Kaila had come. She wanted to meditate, to clear her mind.

  There were many tricks: tell all thoughts to go, chase the wild horses out of the barn, imagine the space in between words in a sentence. It was something she practiced when her mind ran crazy with thoughts that made her feel bad.

  “Relax your cheeks, your jaw,” Lee guided. “Feel the floor like warm sand that you are sinking into. The sun shines above, warm and golden. Breathe.”

  Kaila allowed herself to relax. All thoughts scattered and she eased into a peaceful place, like sinking to the bottom of a warm and soothing pond. She floated serenely.

  Then she heard Priscilla in her mind.

  You are awakening.

  Kaila opened her eyes and glanced at Priscilla, who was lying still, eyes closed.

  Kaila closed her eyes again.

  Yes, you hear me, Priscilla said. Don’t be afraid.

  Kaila inhaled and concentrated on the space around her heart and then up to the space between her eyes.

  What you are doing is good, Priscilla said. It is good to clear the mind.

  How do I know this is real? Kaila asked in her mind.

  You know it’s real.

  But how are you doing this when I am wearing the wig?

  We are in meditation, and you are now receptive.

  What are you? Kaila asked, knowing she wasn’t communing with something all human.

  I’m here to help, Priscilla replied. Help is always available if you call upon it.

  Way outside her mind, Kaila heard her mother instructing the class. “Wiggle your fingers, your toes. Gently come back to the room.”

  Wait! Kaila called in her mind.

  Remember, Kaila, you are much more powerful than you know, Priscilla said.

  Someone else had said that to her recently, too.

  Her mother instructed, “When you are ready, roll on your side.”

  Kaila rolled on her side and faced Priscilla, who looked serenely at Kaila. She reminded Kaila of that good witch Glinda in The Wizard of Oz. But she, herself, was barefoot, no ruby red slippers, and she lay on her side on a yoga mat at home. She wasn’t trying to get home; she was home. So where was she trying so desperately to go?

  Priscilla smiled. They sat up, sitting cross-legged on their mats.

  “Your yoga practice is complete,” her mother said.

  Kaila loved the look in her mom’s and everyone’s faces after mediation—serene and still, as if having just rested in the sun and had been told they were loved.

  “Namaste. The light in me recognizes the light in you.” Her hands at her heart, Lee nodded to all.

  As they rolled their yoga mats, Priscilla said, “I feel so much better after yoga. Do you?”

  “Sure,” Kaila replied. “But what really made you come today?”

  “I like you,” Priscilla said, touching her left hand.

  Kaila drew back her hand.

  “It’s okay,” Priscilla comforted.

  Kaila felt daunted by Priscilla’s incredible beauty and humbled by her light.

  “I want to be here for you,” Priscilla said, her voice melodic.

  Kaila was baffled.

  “I come to you physically to tell you and show you that you can call on me with your mind anytime you like.”

  Kaila said, “Let’s go to the kitchen and talk.”

  “I can’t stay long.” Priscilla touched her forehead, closed her eyes. She looked faint.

  “No, please, stay.”

  “I can’t,” Priscilla said, suddenly looking exhausted. Her face went white.

  “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine,” Priscilla sighed. “I can never stay long. Too much of an energy drain.”

  Her mother tapped Kaila’s shoulder. “How was the sleepover?”

  “It was great.” Kaila turned. Priscilla was gone. “Excuse me, Mom.”<
br />
  As she ran out the parlor, Kaila heard a lady ask her mother what was the deal with the crop circle, ha ha.

  “A prank,” her mother said.

  Kaila could envision her mother clutching her cap, but by this time Kaila was down the hall and into the kitchen.

  She burst outside, counted the cars in front of the house. Seven cars. There had been seven people in class before Priscilla arrived. Now, no trace of Priscilla. Impossible that she could have run down the quarter-mile clamshell driveway from the house to the street this fast.

  Priscilla had disappeared. As if into thin air.

  Chapter 7

  That Saturday afternoon Kaila’s mother mowed the lawn on the riding mower, eradicating all signs of the Venus crop circle. Yet Kaila was becoming alert that signs, obvious and subtle, ran rampant. Though her mother might cut down the crop circle and encase their minds in black plastic, they lived in a land of high strangeness that couldn’t be perennially denied.

  But for now, they clutched at normalcy: Nan cooked a chicken and sausage jambalaya for lunch. Paw Paw dozed in his recliner. After lunch, Mike, Lee, and Kaila attended to the horses.

  The Guidry family housed five Arabians in the barn. Black as the night sky, Nan had named them aptly: Orion, Lyra, Perseus, Pegasus, and Mira. Nan and Paw Paw had been proud horse people, once showing their Arabians, but those days had passed.

  Paw Paw had grown feeble with the chemotherapy, and Nan complained of a bad hip. Kaila remembered when she was little and Pegasus gave birth to Perseus. She’d loved the filly the moment she was born, jet black with a white diamond on her forehead.

  Let’s go! Kaila heard Perseus telepathically as she trudged into the barn over the hay.

  I’m coming. Hold on, Kaila said in her mind, leading her out of her stall.

  What about us? Mira and Lyra called.

  We’ll take you in a bit, Kaila said.

  After saddling Perseus, Kaila nudged the mare, now eleven, into a full gallop across the fields. Mike rode Orion beside her, and Lee rode Pegasus behind.

  The Guidrys didn’t believe in using crops. If you raised and treated a horse right, they were an extension of your own body and you could guide them with a nudge of your thighs and heels.

  Thank you, Perseus said with her mind, her mane riffling in the wind. This feels so good! You’ve not been paying enough attention to me, Perseus pouted as her hooves clopped over the field.

  I’m sorry, Kaila said, gripping the reins. School gets in the way.

  School? Perseus snorted. It’s that boy!

  Kaila leaned over Perseus’s neck. “How do you know about him?” she called aloud.

  He came to visit me.

  “What?” Kaila reined in to a trot. Why would Jordyn come to commune with her horse?

  What did he say?

  Perseus shook her head. Can’t say.

  “Whoa!” Kaila jerked to a stop and dismounted. She walked to face Perseus. “Young lady,” she said aloud. “You tell me what he said. Right now.”

  Perseus shook her head. He made me promise, she moped. Perseus fluttered her eyelashes over her large dark eyes. But … maybe he’s coming tonight. She stamped her hoof. I didn’t say that!

  Kaila stared straight at Perseus, waiting until the horse looked her in the eye. “No secrets. Understand?”

  Perseus snorted.

  Mike and Lee galloped up to Kaila and halted.

  “You gotta stop pretend-talking to these animals,” Mike shouted. “You got friends now.”

  “Whatever.” Kaila re-mounted Perseus.

  Sometimes they rode in the open fields. But today, a bit warm, they headed for the woods, seeking shade. Wildlife abounded: nutria, raccoons, squirrels, possum, and occasionally, water moccasins seeking water.

  They rode a while, Kaila wondering if Jordyn would show up that night. Next, Mike and Kaila rode Mira and Lyra. Then they groomed the five horses, fed and watered them.

  Thank you, Perseus sighed. Much better.

  That night, the family gathered round the television set. As promised, Kaila made popcorn and fed Lucy and Woofy their beloved kernels. Lucy’s pink tongue stuck out as she gazed at Kaila with love.

  “Oh, stop being so mushy. You’re welcome,” Kaila said.

  Lucy barked.

  “I told you I would make popcorn, so I did,” Kaila replied. “Stop. You’re embarrassing me with this fuss.”

  “Quiet,” Mike said. “The news is on.”

  “They’re raising the taxes again?” Nan looked up from her crochet.

  “Idiots,” Paw Paw said. “Every one of them government folk should be run out of town.”

  “We gotta pay for their high falutin’ living, the bastards,” Mike drawled. “Work like a dog, they’ll take every dime. Liars and thieves, every last one of ’em.”

  Kaila sighed, bored. Why did old people like to watch the news with its taxes, murders, floods, diseases, and wars, while complaining the whole time?

  How she wished she could be with Jordyn. Perseus had to be mistaken. He wouldn’t just appear in front of her family. No way.

  Kaila stuck in the ear buds of her iPod. She cranked it up. She closed her eyes, losing herself in the music of Pink. A buzzing sounded inside her ears, below the music. She opened her eyes.

  “Who on earth would be ringing the doorbell?” Nan wondered from her armchair. She put down her crochet needles.

  Kaila raced to the door. Too late. Her mother had opened the door. There stood Jordyn in his silver bodysuit and black t-shirt. He looked past her mother to Kaila.

  Lucy and Woofy barked.

  “Stop!” Kaila cried above the dogs barking, restraining Lucy by her collar.

  Jordyn cast a purposeful gaze down at Lucy and Woofy. They quieted and sat.

  “Oh!” Lee exclaimed. She stepped back, barefoot in yoga pants. “Who’re you?”

  Now Nan and Mike clustered in the doorway. Why couldn’t her family just go away?

  “I’m Jordyn,” he said, staring intently at Lee.

  “Don’t do that,” Kaila implored.

  But already, her mother wore a placid expression.

  Nan said, “Young man, have we been introduced?”

  “For goodness sakes,” Mike intervened. “You all leave the guy alone.” He stuck his hand out to Jordyn. “Hey buddy. How’re you? I’m Mike, Kaila’s step-dad.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Jordyn said, taking Mike’s hand and staring.

  One second. Then Mike froze, his hand out. Nan had her hands on her hips, her mouth open. Lee stood as if in yoga mountain pose.

  Kaila observed that the second hand had stopped on the kitchen clock.

  “You can’t do this to my family,” Kaila wailed.

  She felt conflicted: overjoyed to see Jordyn but weirded out with her family frozen in the kitchen doorway.

  “I wanted to see you,” Jordyn said. “If you don’t want to see me, I’ll go. And then you can get back on the couch and watch the news.”

  “Please. Anything but that!”

  Jordyn stepped closer, drew her to him. His warm arms held her close; he put his lips to her ear.

  “What would you like to do?” he whispered.

  She felt exhilarated yet embarrassed with her family standing around, even though they were unaware.

  Unable to resist, Kaila said, “Send them all to bed.”

  “Your wish is my command.”

  With the family peacefully asleep in their beds, Jordyn and Kaila sat next to each other on the sofa. The dogs slept peacefully on the floor.

  Now together and undisturbed, they fell silent. Jordyn studied the sofa, recliners, rugs, the paintings on the wall, drumming his fingers on his thighs. He cleared his throat.

  To break the silence, Kaila asked, “Did you visit my horse?”

  “What? No. Why would I want to visit your horse?”

  Was he lying? He looked sincere. Kaila realized that maybe the boy Perseus referred to h
ad been one of the others. But who?

  Kaila flipped the channels with the remote. “What do you want to watch?” she asked.

  “I’ve never watched television.”

  “You haven’t?” Kaila was incredulous.

  Jerry Springer was on. A barefooted brunette in a tight short dress belted another woman who was screaming about her being a whore.

  Jordyn stared, aghast, as they pulled each other’s hair until the security guards separated them. He said, “People like this?”

  “I guess.”

  The channel changed. Kaila hadn’t touched the remote. A boxing match. Two large men threw punches with their boxing gloves, circling round each other. One landed a hard right straight into the other’s jaw, sent him to the ground.

  “Ugh,” Jordyn said. “Fighting. This is terrible!”

  The channel changed again. CNN. A bomb going off in the Middle East. People with blood on their faces, people dead in the streets.

  “Why do you do this to each other?” Jordyn asked.

  The channel changed. History Channel. The pyramids in Egypt.

  Jordyn listened to the narration. “Now this is of interest.”

  “Ever since I was a kid I’ve wanted to see the pyramids,” Kaila said. “I’ve wanted to go my whole life.”

  “There’s a reason for that.” Jordyn changed the channel with his mind.

  Kate Winslet and Leonard DiCaprio clung to each other on the Titantic. They kissed one another passionately.

  “I love you,” Kate Winslet declared.

  “What does that mean when they say ‘I love you’?” Jordyn asked.

  Kaila wanted to shout, what I feel for you! But she said, “A good warm feeling for another—where you care about the other.”

  “What happens to those two?” he asked, pointing to Winslet and DiCaprio.

  “Um, the ship sinks and he dies.”

  “They don’t stay together forever?”

  “No. But I think when someone truly loves, they love forever, whether the person is there or not.”

  He gazed at her, digesting this information. His eyes watered. “That’s terrible. They should be together.”

  “Maybe, when she dies, they’re finally together in spirit.”