Starseed

by Gruder, Liz

  The Valdyr Lawless person commented, This is plain mean. Stop!

  Kaila realized then that Valdyr Lawless had to be Jordyn. Only he, Melissa, or Pia would defend her.

  Pia had logged on. Pia would counter attack. This would get worse. And Pia had enough of her own problems being pregnant.

  Kaila logged offline; she couldn’t handle a chat attack from the hyenas. Plus, she didn’t want to advertise that she’d seen this. She was at an utter loss for what to do.

  As she considered her options of defend or attack, she knew she didn’t want to wage war. Why were they so damn mean, so many haters?

  When the so-called popular preps made a judgment, everyone followed suit and attacked. Because they themselves were insecure, they hoped to gain popularity by attacking others.

  Why did she have to be pigeonholed into one stupid group? And why would she want to be pigeonholed when she didn’t even know to which group she belonged? Kaila swallowed the lump in her throat.

  Lucy pushed her head onto Kaila’s lap. Kaila crawled onto the floor and threw her arms about Lucy and nuzzled her face against Lucy’s sleek black fur.

  “I don’t know why they don’t like me,” she wept. Woofy licked her wet cheek.

  “Yes, yes, I know you both like me,” Kaila sobbed. “You’ll always be my friends.” Kaila swiped her cheek with the back of her hand.

  “No, there is nothing you can do to help me,” Kaila replied to them. “Thank you. I have to help myself. But I just don’t know how to fix meanness. I just don’t know what I did to deserve this.”

  Chapter 10

  The next day, the torment accelerated. Though Kaila wore a simple, white t-shirt and faded jeans in an attempt to be anonymous, soon as she stepped off the bus, people pointed and condemned. “Loser. Alien. Poser. Wannabe. Weird.” And she did feel like a poser wearing the stupid hot wig. She didn’t know who she was or where she belonged.

  Noting Kaila’s red eyes and pinched face, Pia and Melissa offered consoling words. The three friends scurried to hide behind the school.

  The hive was there, waiting.

  Jordyn rushed to Kaila. “We do not like that they are so cruel,” he said.

  “How do you know?” Kaila asked. “You aren’t even on Facebook.”

  “We know everything,” said Antonia.

  So here was proof that one of them was Valdyr Lawless. Too many games!

  “You see now,” Viktor said. “This species promises nothing but cruelty and war.”

  “I am starting to agree with you,” Pia said. “But I’m suspicious about other species too,” she said looking Viktor straight in his reptile eyes.

  “Stand back!” Viktor said. “We are infected enough.”

  “Stop,” Jordyn said. “There is enough conflict. If you don’t want contact with Pia, just stay away.

  “What we want to say,” Jordyn continued to Kaila, “is that we need you strong. We do not allow anything to make us weak. We can fix this for you.”

  Kaila understood that Jordyn meant that they could put a global mind-screen on the whole school or town as they had in making everyone believe they were from a cult from New Mexico.

  “And I think you understand,” Kaila replied, “that the only one who can fix this is me.”

  “With group cooperation toward a goal,” Antonia said, “you have more power.”

  Kaila touched her wig. “Still, let me handle this.”

  The bell rang.

  “That was pretty cool,” Melissa said, as they went inside. “They want to help you.”

  “No,” Pia said. “What they want is to entice her to join them.”

  As Kaila turned to go to homeroom, Pia grabbed her arm. “Kaila,” she whispered. “You gotta help us. Don’t defect to them. We need you.” She touched her belly. “Whatever this is, I don’t want it!”

  A trickle of blood ran out of Pia’s nostrils. She pressed a tissue to her nose.

  “It has come to my attention,” said Mrs. Bourg, sitting behind her desk, looking like a tea kettle about to boil, “that not only do we have a problem with alcohol, but we have a problem with what is known as cyber bullying.”

  No. This could not be happening. Kaila glared at the hive. How dare they inform The Bourg of her personal life! They would not look at her, instead staring at Mrs. Bourg with huge eyes and poker faces.

  The Bourg continued, “There are those among us who choose to deride, mock, and tear down their fellow classmates in a public forum. This is just plain wrong.”

  Brandy and Tara looked at Kaila. She didn’t have to read their minds to interpret their expressions that said they thought she was even more pathetic to have run to the teacher and tell.

  Kaila wanted to crawl under her desk into a tight little ball. But she forced herself to sit erect and keep her face emotionless as the hive. She would not give satisfaction of showing distress. She was beginning to understand how some beings feed on misery.

  “I have never understood why people are so cruel,” Mrs. Bourg said, absent her usual zeal. “I, too, have been subjected to scorn and ridicule. Trust me, it hurts. There is not a person in this room who has not been mistreated. So why then, when we have been slapped, do we continue to slap?”

  Silence. Phyllis picked at her cuticle. Douglas crossed his arms over his uncool “Wizards do it with a long staff” t-shirt. Kaila had but a taste of their daily torment. She didn’t need to read their minds to understand perpetual torment.

  “I cannot make anyone understand how much being a victim hurts,” Mrs. Bourg’s voice quivered, “any more than I can wave a wand and make someone have empathy. Well, there are ways to make people kind,” she said looking at the hive. “But they are false, same as making an actor mouth lines in a play.”

  Mrs. Bourg went to the television and slid in a DVD.

  “We will again be treated like high school babies. Today’s video is about cyber bullying. When we can act like those deserving ascension, the teacher will be there.” She turned out the lights.

  But as the instructional movie played and some random douche sat on a park bench preaching empathy and kindness, Kaila knew he may as well have been singing songs to the deaf. She glanced at Brandy and Tara texting on their phones in their laps.

  It would be all over the school how she had “run to mommy” for help. The hive looked at Brandy and Tara too.

  When the movie ended, Jordyn said, “Kaila, please let us help.”

  “No. It’s bad enough you told her.”

  “We didn’t tell her.”

  Kaila looked at him in disbelief.

  “You know we never tell her anything.”

  “Well, then who did?”

  He shrugged.

  The bell rang. As everyone packed their book bags, Jordyn entreated, “Please, Kaila. Let us help. We can’t stand seeing and feeling you so hurt. We’ve never felt this way. It’s awful.”

  His eyebrows knit together forming a harsh furrow. She’d never seen this expression on Jordyn before. She knew then that he was experiencing true hurt because she was hurt.

  “It’ll be okay,” Kaila said. She didn’t want him to hurt. That doubled the misery. The first cut is the deepest.

  “Yes, it will be okay,” he said, his beautiful eyes watering. “No one should feel this … this … there are no words for this.” He slapped his desk. “This is just plain bullshit!”

  Echidna walked in the aisle between Kaila and Jordyn. She towered over Jordyn. “Enough,” she said. “We are all infected. We know what we must do.”

  “Do nothing,” Kaila implored. “I’ll take care of this.”

  Echidna spun around, stared at Kaila with huge black eyes. “Don’t you understand there is no ‘I’?” Echidna said. “It is ‘we.’ We will take care of this.”

  As Kaila stared up at Echidna, she felt Echidna permeating through to her so that the borders between them softened.

  Breaking eye contact, Kaila turned to look at Tob
y. The area where he would have had eyebrows wrinkled. As he stared at Kaila, his lips mouthed the word: “We.” Again she felt a merging consciousness.

  “You are one of us,” Echidna said. “Stop fighting it. See how simple existence can be.”

  Echidna jerked her head. The hive filed out of the classroom.

  Kaila approached Mrs. Bourg’s desk. As they passed, Brandy and Tara grimaced at Kaila like she was a steaming turd.

  “Yes Kaila?” Mrs. Bourg asked. Kaila waited until everyone had left the classroom before she spoke.

  “Tell me the truth. How did you find out what was going on? Who told you?”

  “No one told me.”

  “Then how did you find out what was going on?” Kaila asked.

  “You accepted my friend request.”

  “I did?”

  “Yes, dear. I am Valdyr Lawless.”

  It felt like the floor dropped out from below Kaila.

  “I am friended on Facebook by many in school. This way I can monitor what is going on.”

  Light headed, Kaila frantically tried to recall all that had been said on Facebook.

  “Many people,” Mrs. Bourg explained, “in their quest for popularity, will accept any friend request, even those from complete strangers to add to their numbers to make them seem popular. The true lesson here is to never accept a friend unless you know who they are … and what are their motives.”

  The hive stood in a straight line behind the school, in their metallic bodysuits like soldiers prepared for war. Their faces lifted, palms up, eyes wide and black. She felt their group power transmitting their missive.

  “Stop!” Kaila ran in front of the line, but they may as well have been constructed of steel. She waved her hands in front of them, but they continued to stare with unseeing eyes.

  Then their eyes returned to normal color. Echidna advanced out of the line. She cupped Kaila’s chin.

  “Understand. We protect our own.” She squeezed Kaila’s chin with long bony fingers. “And cease your emotion. We feel your hurt. It is most distracting.”

  “But I don’t want this,” Kaila said, fearful of the projected mind-screen.

  “It is done,” Jordyn said. “We will not stand by to see one of us hurt.”

  Hearing an invisible summons, the hive simultaneously jerked their heads. Then they vanished.

  Kaila sighed, left alone. Whatever it was, she would have to deal with it. She would not cry anymore, not be a baby. She would take a lesson from the hive and never show emotion. Maybe they were right that it was better not to feel at all. She rolled back her shoulders and stood tall. She opened the door to the school.

  “Hey Kaila!” Wade lurked in the hall as usual, sniffing for prey. He had that mean look on his ruddy face, his eyes slit like a crocodile.

  “What do you want?” Kaila clenched her fists.

  “I just wanted to say,” he paused. His face went blank as if trying to recall something. Then his eyes looked dead. “I just wanted to tell you what a jerk I was for writing all that stuff about you. I’m sorry. Truth is, I had a crush on you. Then, when you rejected me, I got nasty. Can you forgive me?”

  Kaila realized Wade’s sentiment was one-hundred percent programmed. And in language he would never use.

  Wade continued, “I think you’re the best girl I’ve ever met.”

  Jeez, Kaila thought. We’ve never had a real conversation. He doesn’t even know me!

  “And,” Wade continued. “I was wondering if you’d go with me to Homecoming?”

  “Hold on,” Derek interrupted. “I wanted to ask her.”

  Brandy and Tara joined them. “Kaila,” Brandy said, “I’m having a party this weekend. Can you come? Wow, that blouse is so cute.”

  “It’s adorable,” Tara said. Kaila wore a white t-shirt. All fawned like zombie actors, mouthing scripted lines.

  “Let me get back to you,” Kaila said.

  “Of course!” Brandy twirled a lock of her strawberry hair on her finger.

  As Kaila pushed through the crowd in the hallway, people said, “Hey Kaila,” or offered a compliment. Everyone smiled and nodded, deferring to her like the President of the United States. Kaila ran.

  The bus offered no refuge. Everyone smiled obsequiously. Several got up and offered her a seat. She pushed through them to the back of the bus. She wanted so badly to tell Melissa and Pia what was happening but knew she could not. At least they were her friends.

  Melissa and Pia separated to make room for her.

  “Hey,” Pia said, glowing like Pia never would. “Did I ever tell you how honored I am to be friends with the most popular girl in school?”

  Melissa and Pia leaned their heads on her shoulder.

  “For sure!” Melissa said.

  Oh my god. Ech!

  “Get off me!” Kaila said. “Just be yourselves.”

  Pia looked puzzled. “We are ourselves. We adore you. Hey, is there anything we can do special for you at your birthday party?”

  “Yeah,” Melissa chimed. “Anything at all? We’ll do anything to make it a happy day.”

  You could start by wiping off those simpering expressions that are making me want to hurl.

  “Darling!” her mother cried when Kaila walked into the kitchen. She crushed Kaila in a bear hug. “How we missed you. We couldn’t wait for you to get home. Muah muah!” She kissed Kaila’s cheeks.

  “Ugh, gross, get off me.” Kaila pushed her mother away.

  “Aw honey, you know we love you,” Mike said, giving her a hug. He never hugged her. He was always the macho tugboat captain.

  “Made your favorite,” Nan said, needling in to hug her. “Fried shrimp and tartar sauce.”

  “Sounds good, Nan. Yeah. Thanks a million.” Kaila wriggled out of Nan’s grasp. “Look y’all, I got a ton of homework. So, bye!”

  Kaila noted Paw Paw sleeping in his armchair. Jordyn had never answered about helping him. She’d have to pester the hive to heal Paw Paw. She pictured him being whole and well again, racing the horses beside her in the fields. Everything was happening so fast, she hadn’t time to think! She raced upstairs to her room and locked the door.

  She changed into a comfy big shirt and sat on the floor petting Lucy and Woofy, thankful for the stillness and the only sound the dogs panting. After a while, she calmed. She rose and sat in front of her computer. Facebook. After signing in, Kaila saw she had 4,487 friend requests.

  She scanned the profiles of those requesting. Kaila guessed the entire town had sent her a friend request. So the mind-screen blanketed the entire town. It included every old fart, every grade school kid, the entire school, and the faculty. Even the janitor and cafeteria ladies.

  Additionally, Wade had de-posted his mean comments. His new status: Asked Kaila Guidry to Homecoming. She is so HOT, the finest, and my ultimate crush.

  Kaila’s stomach churned. But worse, the comments. Derek: No way, spermfest. She’s going with me. I want to be seen with the most beautiful girl in town.

  There were over a hundred more comments.

  Brandy: You would be sooo lucky to take Kaila to the dance.

  Tara: If I was a guy, I would ask her to the dance. I’m even thinking of turning gay to ask her myself … This comment was liked twenty-seven times.

  Kaila put her hand over her little mouth as she stared at the computer screen.

  Lastly, there were comments from Valdyr Lawless, aka The Bourg. Kaila truly is one of the smartest, luckiest girls on earth. Worse, it was liked sixty-seven times.

  Kaila stared at the screen, wanting to type obscenities. She felt defeated and empty. She should be happy; didn’t everyone dream of being the most popular person in school? But this was like getting an A on an exam where she cheated. Then being made valedictorian by scamming her way through school. Worse, now, she was even defrauded of the sincerity of her friends and family.

  She wished she could talk to Jordyn about helping Paw Paw and feeling overwhelmed with
everything, but she knew he was prevented from spending time with her by himself. So even though she was the most popular person, she was alone.

  Kaila pondered that high school and cruelty were a package deal. She had lived in a fairytale world thinking school would be a place where people her age gathered to learn and make friends. It was more this medieval gathering of tribes at war, trying to conquer the weak or different. Why couldn’t everyone get along? Why was it such a crime to be different? Kaila sighed, wishing she would get kicked out of that stupid school.

  And then she had an idea.

  The next day she would wear the dorkiest outfit she could find. When everyone saw how dorky it was, it would jerk an alert in their minds. Then maybe the mind-screen’s potency would dilute from total popularity to normal. And if they made fun of her, she didn’t care. She hoped she would be sent home. She was close to being done. Baked. Cooked. Crispy.

  After rummaging in her closet and selecting the next day’s attire, she crawled into bed where she tossed and turned for hours. She clicked her phone for the time. 4:11 the white numerals stated.

  When Kaila came to the breakfast table, exhausted but resolute, she received a hint how the day would turn out.

  “Aw honey, those mouse ears look so cute on you,” her mother said, sliding pancakes on her plate. “Didn’t we get those at Disney when you were five?”

  “Yeah, Mom.”

  “Hey,” said Mike. “I see you’re finally wearing my Christmas gag gift t-shirt.”

  Kaila wore a black t-shirt with big block letters that proclaimed: “Ask Me About My Explosive DiarrhEA.” If that didn’t jar them out of the mind-screen, nothing would.

  “You know,” Nan said. “I used to think that shirt was disgusting, but now it’s cute.”

  “Adorable,” her mom said.

  Kaila sighed. So this must be the explanation why people gushed over terrible books, music, and movies. The aliens had blanketed a mind-screen over the entire planet. Then, all the zombies crooned in unison, “It’s sooo wonderful!” when it wasn’t wonderful. Some things just downright sucked.

  She’d often puzzled why people flocked to mind-numbing, retarded movies and why radios blared bullshit songs. Now she knew the answer: planetary mind-screen.