Winter Hopes (Seasons of Love)

by Jennifer Gracen

  Matt nodded curtly and asked, “How much is this going to run us?”

  Lydia smiled a small, victorious smile. “Well, there’s one bonus. It doesn’t cost us anything. The school district pays for it. Our tax dollars at work. We didn’t ask to put him there, they placed him there, so they pay for it. We don’t pay a dime. Feel a little better about it now?”

  “No,” he spat. “No, I don’t.”

  Lydia nodded. “I know. It’s… a lot to take in.”

  “You should have told me,” Matt said tightly. He looked ready to explode, but was managing to somehow rein it in. “You should have called me the day you got the call from his teacher. You should have told me about the CPSE meeting. From now on, I expect to be consulted on every major decision that has to do with my son. Every single one. He’s my son too, goddammit. Am I clear, Lydia? You got that?”

  “Sure,” she said in a low voice, swallowing back any further reply.

  They stood and stared at each other for a few heavy seconds. Matt was the one to break the gaze. “Andy,” he called out, looking away. “Come on out.”

  Andy came flying out of his room at the end of the short hallway. He ran into his father’s waiting arms.

  “We’re gonna get your jacket, buddy,” Matt told the boy. “Time to get going.”

  “Yah!” Andy smiled. He turned to Lydia and opened his arms for a hug.

  Lydia went over to take Andy out of Matt’s arms and squeeze him tightly in her embrace. “Mommy loves you, sweetie,” she murmured into his hair, covering his cheeks with kisses. “Mommy loves you so much.”

  Andy smiled brightly. “Maaaama.” He kissed her face with big, wet smacks, and giggled.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow night,” she said. “Daddy will bring you home tomorrow after dinner. You have fun with Daddy this weekend, okay? Just you boys? You have a good time.”

  “Yah, yaaaah,” Andy smiled again. He let Matt help him put his coat on, then grabbed his stuffed Elmo doll and headed right for the door. Matt turned to pick up the little Elmo suitcase.

  “Hey, wait for me, buddy!” Matt called out. He rushed to follow the little boy. “I’ll bring him home tomorrow at six,” he said over his shoulder, closing the door behind him.

  Lydia sank onto the couch and took a deep, cleansing breath. Well, that could have been worse, she thought to herself. But she couldn’t make her stomach stop churning. Rubbing her cold hands together, she sat for a few minutes, just breathing and composing herself. With a last deep breath, she looked at her watch. She had forty minutes to get herself together, double check her overnight bag, and get to the train station.

  She stood up purposefully. She couldn’t wait to get to the city, get to Sam, and just put the morning—and her tumultuous world—behind her for a little while.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  “HAPPY THANKSGIVING!” Ethan yelled for the eighteenth time that day.

  “He certainly is ebullient, isn’t he?” Paul Goldstein said. He smiled indulgently at his grandson, then shifted in his seat on the couch to watch Ethan and Andy run around the living room, screeching as they went. “They both are. Such energy! How can anyone keep up?”

  “We barely do, Dad,” Jane cracked, leaning into her husband, who lounged beside her. “We’re all exhausted by the end of the day, every day. Little ones are exhausting.”

  “Alright, you two,” Tyler said loudly to the boys. “That’s it for the running in here. All the kids are down in the playroom, and that’s where you guys need to be. Go on.”

  “Go on,” Roslyn Goldstein echoed to her grandchildren. “Go downstairs. We’ll see you soon. Go play.”

  The boys did as they were told, giggling as they headed to the basement.

  Lydia surveyed the scene from her armchair in the corner. On the two brown leather couches that faced each other in the middle of Jane’s large, spacious living room sat all of her immediate family; Tyler and Jane on one couch, her parents on the other. Before that afternoon, Lydia hadn't seen her parents in almost six months.

  She thought that Roslyn and Paul looked pretty good for their mid-sixties. Time had been fairly kind to them. Roslyn’s brown hair was a bit thinner than it had been in her youth, and it was shorter than Lydia had seen it before; she'd always wondered why women cut their hair short when they got older. She had no intention of doing so when she got older. Paul’s hair had vanished years before, leaving a monk’s ring around his head; but it was all salt and pepper now, instead of the chestnut brown of his younger years.

  Lydia watched her parents as they talked with Jane and Tyler. When she scrutinized them closely, they did appear to have aged slightly—she could see the subtle changes. Since they’d moved to Florida about eight years before, she'd become more aware of the passing of time, since she only saw them a few times a year. This visit, they were a little grayer, a little more lined in the face, a little more slouched over. But overall, they both still looked good and were healthy, and for that she was glad.

  Her mother seemed to sense she was being studied and glanced over at Lydia. When their eyes met, they smiled at each other warmly. Just then, Lydia’s cell phone jingled from her jeans pocket, signaling her that she had a text message. She pulled it out to look at the screen.

  Zack just almost pulled the turkey off the kitchen counter, Sam’s text read. Everyone freaked. I almost wet myself laughing.

  Lydia pressed her lips together to stifle a giggle. Wish I could’ve seen that! she wrote back, smiling.

  Yeah, my nephew’s something else, Sam wrote back immediately. How’s it going there?

  So far, okay, Lydia texted. But it’s early yet. Give it time.

  “What are you doing over there?” Paul’s voice boomed, making Lydia jump.

  “Just texting, Dad,” Lydia said as she regained herself.

  “That’s a little rude, with your whole family here, don’t you think?” Paul’s watery blue eyes focused on his younger daughter.

  “I wasn’t trying to be rude,” Lydia said coolly. “Sorry if it offended you. I’ll sign off.”

  Gotta go, she texted quickly. Keep texting me all day, though, it makes me smile.

  “Who are you texting, anyway?” Roslyn asked, annoyed.

  “No one you know,” Lydia said. “Just a friend.”

  You got it, came Sam’s answering text. You make me smile too.

  Lydia grinned softly and shoved her phone back into her pocket.

  “So Mom,” Jane said, quickly changing the subject in an effort to shield Lydia from any further questions. “Are we going to do some damage tomorrow? Mad shopping spree on Black Friday? You up for it?”

  “Depends where we go,” Roslyn said. “Will Sophie come with us? I’d really like her to, I want to buy her something she wants, something special.”

  “Ah, indulging the only granddaughter,” Tyler smiled. “Sounds great, Roz. Sophie will love that.”

  “And Lydia?” Roslyn glanced back over at her. “You’re coming too, right?”

  “I can’t, I have Andy,” Lydia said. “Matt’s not taking him until Saturday morning.”

  “Leave him here with us,” Tyler suggested. “We’ll have a boys day, and you’ll all have a girls day. Seriously.”

  Lydia arched an eyebrow with skepticism. “Are you sure?”

  “Of course,” Tyler said easily. “It’s only for a few hours.”

  “What, you think we can’t handle him?” Paul asked, almost snide. “Come on, what’s one more boy?”

  You'll see for yourself, when Andy's that one more boy, Lydia thought. “Well, alright then,” she said. “Thanks for the offer, Ty. That’ll be nice.”

  “Come over early,” Jane told her. “I want to get out really early. Come at like… eight-thirty. We’ll all have a quick breakfast together, and we ladies can be on the road at nine.”

  “Okay,” Lydia nodded. “You want me to pick up bagels on the way?”

  “Sure, sounds good,” Jane said. “I’ll make coff
ee, don’t get any.”

  “Can you get some lox too?” Paul asked.

  “Of course, Dad,” Lydia smiled.

  “And some creamed herring too?” Paul added, his face brightening from the idea.

  “Ugh,” Jane grunted. “That stuff is so gross.”

  “I love it!” Paul cried. “And I’m in New York, I can get the real thing!”

  “No problem, Dad,” Lydia said.

  “It’s bad for your blood pressure,” Roslyn muttered to her husband.

  “So I’ll drink a lot of water after,” Paul said, waving her off.

  Tyler’s younger brother, Jack, came into the living room. He smiled at the group in greeting before he said, “Hey, Ty. You have too many remotes down there, I can’t figure out how to get the Wii started. Give us a hand?”

  “Sure,” Tyler said, standing. He gave Jane a quick kiss on the lips before he excused himself.

  “He still loves you,” Roslyn teased her. “That’s nice.”

  “Yeah, he’s a keeper,” Jane acknowledged with a grin.

  “Thirteen years of marriage, I should hope so!” Paul laughed.

  “I’m very lucky.” Jane smiled. “He’s a good man.”

  “Yes he is,” Lydia said, rising from the armchair. “I’m going to get a glass of wine. Anyone want anything while I’m up?”

  “No thanks, honey.” Roslyn smiled.

  “It’s a little early for wine, isn’t it?” Paul asked with a staunch look.

  Lydia checked her watch. It was two-thirty. And she was with her parents. “On a holiday? Nah.” She stretched her arms over her head. “Janie, want anything?”

  “Actually, I’ll come with you,” Jane said, also rising. “I should go see how things are going in the kitchen, and mingle with the rest of my company a bit too.”

  “Well, Tyler’s family is all downstairs,” Paul pointed out with a disdainful expression. “Not very social, if you ask me.”

  “Dad,” Jane chided, “Jack and Debbie are downstairs with all of the kids. Three of mine, and Andy, and two of their own. That’s a huge help to us.”

  “They could come up here too,” Paul shrugged.

  “They will, when it’s time to eat,” Jane said, patting her father’s shoulder as she passed him. “And then it’ll be so loud, you’ll wish everyone was back downstairs.”

  Paul made a face and Roslyn smiled at their daughters as they left the living room.

  “Think you’re escaping without me?” Jane whispered to her sister. “The hell you are.”

  Lydia repressed a chuckle. “I tried to lasso you. I had to get out of there before the next round of questions started. I saw where that conversation was going.”

  “I know. Come on, I want a glass of wine too. Maybe the whole bottle.”

  They giggled and made their way into the kitchen, where Tyler’s mother and aunt were chopping vegetables for a tremendous salad. The counter before them was cluttered with bowls and pieces of red and yellow peppers, cucumbers, and carrots.

  “Mom! Aunt Kathy!” Jane cried. “I didn’t realize you two were in here doing this! Oh my goodness, I’m sorry!”

  “Can we help?” Lydia asked, eyeing the peppers that hadn’t been cut yet.

  “Wait, I have an even better idea,” Jane quipped good-naturedly to the older women. “You two get lost, and let Lyddie and me take over.”

  “Nothing doing,” Millie Aronson smiled. Jane tried to move in on her, and Millie gave her daughter-in-law a small, joking nudge with her elbow. “You get lost! Go on, we’re working here!” she laughed.

  “But you’re guests here,” Jane tried to argue.

  “Guests?” Kathy scoffed in mock indignation. “How offensive!”

  “We’re family, not guests,” Millie said. “We’ll let you two know if we need help, okay? Go away now, and let two elder ladies busy themselves. You had most of the food brought in, we had to do something.”

  Jane sighed. “Alright. I'll surrender this time. But I’m coming back in a few minutes. You’re warned.”

  Lydia found two wine glasses and plucked a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon from the corner wine rack. “Jane?” She held up her finds. “I think your backyard is calling us.”

  “I think she’s right,” Aunt Kathy laughed.

  “Corkscrew,” Millie reminded them.

  “Ah yes, thank you,” Jane replied. She grabbed a silver corkscrew from a drawer, dropped light kisses on both women's cheeks, and followed Lydia out the back door.

  The sisters crossed the backyard in contented silence. The breeze that blew was cool, but not cold. One of the neighbors must have lit their fireplace, for the quintessential autumn scent of burning wood flowed around them on the crisp air as they kicked through the last of the brown leaves that had fallen onto the lawn. They sat on a long, ornate iron bench positioned against the wall of high, manicured bushes. Lydia gazed restfully at the thick clouds that floated in the grayish sky.

  “Ahhh.” Jane smiled, taking in and then exhaling a deep breath as she relaxed. “I love that smell. Such a Fall smell.”

  “One of my very favorite smells,” Lydia agreed.

  “Yup. Now give me that bottle.”

  “I’ve got it.” Lydia grinned. “Give me the corkscrew.”

  “Bossy pants,” Jane wisecracked, handing it over. “Give me the glasses, then.”

  Lydia opened the bottle of wine and poured a healthy amount into the glasses Jane held out. They clinked in a toast.

  “Happy Turkey Day,” Lydia said.

  “And to you,” Jane replied. “L'chaim.”

  They drank long, deep sips.

  “So are they driving you crazy yet?” Lydia asked. “Because I’m feeling it already, and I’ve only been here for two hours. You’ve had them here since last night.”

  “Of course they’re driving me crazy.” Jane shrugged. “They’re Paul and Roslyn. Thank God for Tyler; he has infinite amounts of patience when it comes to them, for some reason. I seem to have less with each subsequent visit.” She crossed one leg over the other and sat back. “Jesus, look how empty this yard looks with no leaves on the trees. I hate that.”

  “Yet you still have flowers,” Lydia noted, also reclining a bit.

  “Yeah,” Jane said, glancing at the rows of purple, red, and white impatiens along her back wall. “They refuse to die. It hasn’t been cold enough yet. Power to ‘em.”

  “Listen,” Lydia said, her voice suddenly earnest. “I, um… well, it’s Thanksgiving. And I wanted to take this opportunity to be the big sap that I am and tell you that one of the things I’m most thankful for in the world is you, Janie. Every day, not just today. I honestly don’t know how I would’ve gotten through the last year without you. Your support, your cheerleading, your help, your babysitting… everything you do for me. I would have drowned. I am so grateful and so lucky to have you for a sister, and one of my best friends, and I just really wanted to make sure I told you that today.”

  Jane looked stunned. Her eyes filled with soft tears. “Oh, Lydia. What a beautiful thing to say.” She leaned over, careful not to spill her wine, and hugged her sister tightly. “You’re very welcome. I’m happy I can help you. I love you. I’d do anything for you.”

  “And you have,” Lydia said, hugging her sister back. “I just wanted to officially say it, since it’s Thanksgiving. I’m very, very thankful for you.”

  “Stop it,” Jane sniffled into Lydia’s copper mane of hair. She kissed the side of Lydia’s forehead before pulling away to wipe away tears. “One day, things will be better for you, and you won’t need me as much. But in the meantime, I’m here. It’s you and me against the world, kid, just like always. Together forever.”

  “Thank God,” Lydia smiled softly, clinking her glass delicately to Jane's.

  ***

  “I’m playing whoever wins,” Alec declared moments after entering the playroom. He watched his oldest daughter lying across the floor, her tiny mouth pursed in concentration
as she played air hockey against her uncle. The large board took up most of the floor space. “I can’t believe you dragged that thing out of the closet,” he said to his brother.

  “Hope was bored, and I remembered you had it stashed in there,” Sam said as he took another shot. The ten-year-old girl deflected it, protecting her goal by stopping the small puck just short of its intended target.

  “Ha!” Hope cried, victory gleaming in her eyes. Her dark blonde curls bounced as she tossed her head and said, “I’m not going down without a fight, Uncle Sam.”

  “That’s my girl,” Alec beamed as he sat on the couch. “You hear that fighting spirit? She’s her father’s daughter.”

  “Then look out world,” Sam grinned ruefully. He and Hope volleyed the puck a few more times before he took another hard shot; this time, it sailed through the tiny goal.

  “Darn it!” Hope shrieked, her brows furrowing and her mouth puckering up in a pout.

  “That’s four to three now, right?” Sam asked lightly.

  “Yes,” Hope grumbled.

  “Who’s winning?” Alec asked.

  “I am right now,” Sam said. “But I think you should play this girl when we’re done. She’s getting better at this. I’d like to see her kick your butt.”

  “I’d like to see her try,” Alec teased, winking at his daughter.

  When Sam got his fifth goal, he declared the game over, shook Hope’s hand, and got up off the floor. He dropped a kiss on the top of his niece’s head and ceremoniously handed his disk to his older brother. “Here ya go, big man.”

  “Thank you,” Alec said with a small bow. He also kissed Hope on the top of her head before taking the spot that Sam had vacated on the plush blue carpet.

  “Do they need help in the kitchen with anything?” Sam asked, heading for the door.

  “I don’t think so,” Alec said. “Paige, Arlene, and Mom seem to have it covered.”

  “Okay,” Sam said. “Where’s Dad hiding?”

  “Out in the backyard,” Alec replied. “He took Zack and Cindy outside to let them run around a little, get some air.”

  Sam nodded, winked at Hope with an affectionate grin, and left them to their game. As he walked through Alec and Paige’s house, he pulled his iPhone out of his pocket and checked it for messages. He was beyond relieved to see none were from the office waiting for him; it took a national holiday for him to have no work at hand, no crises to manage, no clients to deal with. There were text messages from Everett and John, each wishing him a Happy Thanksgiving. He quickly texted them good wishes in return, then went to the kitchen. Heading towards the back door, he smiled at his mother, then Paige, and then Paige’s mother, Arlene, as they worked to prepare various side dishes for the big meal.