The Lawman's Christmas Proposal

by Barbara White Daille

Whatever happened, she was going for her one-and-only time.

  He had turned the covers of the bed down to the foot and lay half propped against a couple of the pillows. Cans of soda from the room’s mini-refrigerator sat on the nightstands on either side of the bed, and a magazine she had seen on the table lay spread open on his lap.

  She piled her pillows together.

  “Before you get into bed,” he said, “I left you something over on the table.”

  “You did?” A brown paper sack with the top rolled together sat in the center of the wooden square. “What is it?”

  “Go find out.”

  She crossed the room and opened the sack. Smiling, she pulled out the wooden donkey she had seen in the shop that afternoon. He now wore a big red Christmas bow around his neck. “You shouldn’t have.”

  “I had to. I saw you look back after we walked away.”

  “And when I was still in the kitchen shop, you went to get him?”

  “Yeah.”

  She stared down at the donkey. “I’ll bet he was sad I left him there.”

  “Very.”

  She looked again at Mitch. “I’m sorry about that. Truly sorry. And I’m so glad he’s here now.”

  “I’m sure he is, too.”

  “Thank you.”

  He smiled. “My pleasure.”

  She set her gift on the nightstand and climbed onto the bed. As she propped up her pillows, the robe shifted. She eased it closed again, hoping he hadn’t noticed. Not yet. She wanted him more than she ever had before. It was too soon for that, too.

  He hadn’t said another word. She took a breath and let it out slowly. “You were right that day by the corral, Mitch, when you said I’d want to have a memory of us. I do, to go along with all the other good memories we shared.”

  “Like that jackrabbit?”

  “Oh. Him.” She laughed, feeling her cheeks heat. One day toward dusk, when he had finished his work in the barn, they had slipped away. They had gone to “their” spot near the creek, where a couple of large, flat rocks made a perfect place for them to sit and talk. They had been doing just that when a stray rabbit bounded out of the underbrush near them, scaring her nearly half to death.

  “Yeah, him,” he agreed. “I don’t know where we’d ever have gotten if he hadn’t come along.”

  “You mean I have the jackrabbit to thank for our first kiss?”

  “You sure do. Well, that and the fact you’d jumped straight into my arms.”

  Even the memory was enough to make her feel like an awkward teen again. Something she did not want to experience tonight. Struggling to think of what to say, she cleared her throat and looked away.

  “There’s a drink for you over there.” He gestured to the can on the nightstand beside her. “I thought you might like a nightcap, compliments of the house. They’ve only got soda and iced tea here. For anything stronger, I can take a trip down to the restaurant again.”

  “You’d have to get dressed.”

  “I wouldn’t mind, if you had a taste for something else.”

  “I would mind. And I do have a taste for something else.”

  She shifted on her pillows to face him.

  He sat without moving a muscle, as if he wasn’t sure what was going on or what he was supposed to do. His reaction made her think of her own indecision a moment ago. She smiled.

  His gaze drifted from her face to the front of her robe, then back again. He shook his head. She realized his hesitation hadn’t come from indecision but out of concern for her. “Whatever this is, Andi, it’s not necessary. I told you this trip was just for show.”

  “Then show me.”

  “What?” he asked hoarsely. “How much I want you?”

  She nodded.

  He took the magazine from his lap and tossed it onto his nightstand.

  She looked down at his thin cotton sweats. “I guess that proves your point.”

  He laughed, but shook his head again. “Are you sure?”

  “Are you crazy? How much more obvious do I need to make this?”

  “I don’t know. But I don’t guess I can expect another jackrabbit to come by and move things along.” He reached across the bed for the tie at her waist and undid the bow. Her robe fell open. The sound of his sharp breath and the look in his blue eyes made her glad she had left her nightgown hanging on the bathroom door.

  He slid his hand inside the robe, his rough thumb brushing her breast with just enough friction to make her own breath catch.

  “You know how long I’ve waited for this,” he said.

  “As long as I have.”

  “But tomorrow—”

  “Mitch.” Through the robe, she touched his hand. “We’re not talking about tomorrow. In fact, we don’t need to talk at all tonight.”

  “That would be fine. But here’s the thing.” He smiled. “If I get started...not talking with you, I won’t want to stop.”

  “Show me.”

  He moved closer and kissed her, long and hard, and then he showed her what she’d missed for all these years.

  * * *

  ANDI WOKE TO lamplight shining directly into her eyes. At first, they had been too busy to think of turning the lamp off. Later, they had drifted to sleep in its glow.

  Mitch lay pressed against her back with the heavy warmth of his arm around her. When she stirred, he shifted away, easing her onto her back. Before she could move, he rose to one elbow and dipped his head, kissing her with a familiar thoroughness but more gently than he had all night. That gentleness made her want him all over again.

  As if he’d read her mind, he kissed and caressed her until she was ready for him. And as they made love, his tenderness made this time seem bittersweet.

  Afterward, she closed her suddenly damp eyes and turned onto her side. He moved to lie against her again, his hand curved around her lower belly. When he stroked her there, she felt an answering response even lower down.

  “You do know it’s still the middle of the night,” he murmured.

  She nodded. “I saw the clock.”

  “Restless?”

  “I guess so. Or maybe just a mother’s instinct, being always on the alert for noises that shouldn’t be there.”

  “Yeah. Kind of like being a cop.”

  Just the words she needed to break her heart. “I’m sorry if I woke you. Have you been up for a while?”

  “Give me a break, woman, I’ve been up quite a few times already.” His laugh ruffled her hair. “And I’m having a great middle of the night. You can take that to court.” She stiffened. His arm tightened just a bit, and she couldn’t tell if it was in reaction to her movement or not. He kissed her bare shoulder. “I’m getting a good night’s rest, too.”

  She forced a laugh. “Maybe that’s not such a compliment.”

  “It’s a darned good one.” He rolled her onto her back again. “Actually, since coming back to Cowboy Creek, I’ve slept better than I have in...a long time.”

  “Getting out of the city is doing you good.” In the lamplight, she saw his eyes narrow for a moment, then he gave her a smile that didn’t seem any more natural than her laugh.

  “It’s not the city I needed to get away from.” He sounded grim.

  “I’m here if you want to talk about it.”

  “I’d rather talk about you. You’re the one helping me sleep at night.”

  “Me?” Something else he attributed to her, just as he had made her departure his reason for leaving Cowboy Creek. “And how do I do that?” The question was out before she had thought about how teasing it might sound, but his thinned lips and tight jaw made her see this wasn’t a light topic.

  “Let’s just say I’d rather dream about you than have nightmares any night. But we were talking about you.” He brushed his thumb across her stomach. “You’ve got scars. From the kids.”

  “Yes.” She half sat up to push her pillows behind her, then dragged the sheet up to her shoulders. “I told you I had trouble carrying Trey.
Bed rest got me through the final trimester, but I wasn’t able to deliver him naturally. Or Missy.”

  Through the sheet, he rested his hand on her stomach again. “You don’t have to hide.”

  “I’m not. I had a chill.” No...she’d had a chill last night. She had seen his scars for the first time. The glow from the bedside lamp had revealed a corrugated pink mass scoring the skin over and all around his knee. The sight had made her shiver. Now it made her frozen inside.

  She hesitated, but couldn’t go on. He had his secrets. She’d had hers.

  She still had one. But not for long. She had one more truth to tell him that she couldn’t keep to herself. “Tonight has been...wonderful.”

  He gave a low laugh. “As I said, I’m having a good time myself.”

  “Worth waiting for?”

  “Without a doubt.” He kissed her hand.

  She reached up to touch his cheek. Dark stubble prickled her fingers. “I like you kissing me and touching me. But making love... When we were teens, I didn’t know what I was missing.”

  “Me, either. But I thought about it a lot.”

  “I thought about it, too. I dreamed about you, especially after I went away. I loved you, Mitch. I still love you, even more now than I did then.”

  His eyes darkened. She could see his throat working hard, hear his swallow. After a long moment, he said, “Enough to take me as I am?”

  When she said nothing, he rested her hand on his chest. She could feel his heart thumping against her palm.

  Hadn’t she known he would ask the one question she didn’t want to answer? Closing her eyes, she turned her head away.

  As he pressed her hand beneath his, she heard him sigh.

  Chapter Seventeen

  They left Santa Fe even earlier than they had intended, and the ride home to Cowboy Creek felt longer than usual in the quiet. It gave Andi too much time to think about the man beside her and the question he had asked. The one she couldn’t bear to answer.

  Up ahead, she could see the final turnoff to the road leading to the Hitching Post. In just minutes, they would call off their engagement, as planned.

  Admitting their romance couldn’t be real, that she had no hope left for a chance with Mitch, made her feel empty inside. The feeling only confirmed what she had known from the minute she had seen him again. She had always loved him.

  But now, she needed to walk away.

  When they reached the hotel and he began to turn his truck toward the parking area, she said, “Just drop me off in front, please.”

  He kept driving. “I’m not letting you go in to break the news to your family on your own.”

  “It’s all right—”

  “Not by me, it isn’t.”

  “I can handle it, Mitch.”

  “It was my idea that got you into this,” he said stubbornly. “Besides, I’m going to have to face your family sometime. I might as well do it now.” He parked the truck and took her overnight bag from the rear seat.

  She hesitated, wanting to tell him again to go. To assure him he didn’t need to take on her guilt. But he had already come around to open her door.

  Sighing, she gathered up her collection from yesterday’s shopping expedition. All the items she had bought for the reception hall...the parrots for the dining room...the gift he had given her—the wooden donkey with the sombrero and big red bow, a whimsical little reminder of a trip that hadn’t lived up to its promise.

  She would always regret this morning.

  But she could never forget last night.

  Her only bright spot in this very dark day was her son’s greeting. When they went into the lobby, she saw him and Robbie in the sitting room. She set her bags on the registration desk.

  The minute he spotted her, he broke into a huge grin and ran to throw his arms around her in a tight hug. “I missed you, Mommy!”

  “I missed you, too.” She kissed the top of his head, then gave Robbie a hug. “And Missy. Where is she?”

  “At Rachel’s house,” Robbie said. “With Jane.”

  She didn’t have to ask where Grandpa Jed might be. He rose from one of the couches in the sitting room and stood beaming at them. The boys ran back to where she could see they had spread a few of Trey’s birthday toys on the floor. She followed, taking the rocker near the fireplace.

  Mitch settled onto a couch across from Jed.

  “Where’s Tina?” Andi asked.

  “She drove Paz to town for an order.”

  She swallowed a sigh of relief. That took care of the rest of her family. For now. “And our guests are out at the corral for their riding lessons?”

  “Yep.” He was still standing, which puzzled her. In fact, he had started toward the door. “I’ll just run up and tell your mother-in-law you’re home.”

  She gasped. Mother-in-law?

  Before she could question him, he was gone.

  She turned to Mitch in dismay. “Oh, no. Ginnie was supposed to be on her way home this morning. Now what do we do?”

  “We go to plan B,” he said. “Until we find out what’s going on, we keep everything status quo. But my gut’s telling me we can forget the breakup idea until you talk to her after the holidays.”

  “But—”

  “It’s probably better to draw things out, anyway. When the time’s right, we’ll tell people we gave the relationship a good, honest try, and it just didn’t work out. Till then, we can play the loving couple. “

  “I can’t.” Not after last night.

  He shrugged. “Take your pick, Andi,” he said in a low, harsh tone. “Get everybody in an uproar just before the wedding and go right back where you started as far as your mother-in-law is concerned. Or wait till things settle down. You’re lucky enough to have not one but two backup plans.”

  Now hearing nothing but bitterness, she swallowed hard. She couldn’t understand why he would choose to continue the farce. But she knew she didn’t have a choice.

  * * *

  ONCE MITCH LEFT, Andi fled upstairs for a while to be alone. To think.

  Only a few minutes later, Jane tapped on the door, holding Missy in her arms.

  It was the sight she needed to restore her. “Hey, sweetie. Let Mommy hold you.” She reached for Missy and gave her a kiss.

  “She needs a change,” Jane said.

  “You ought to be practicing those skills,” she said with a shaky laugh as she pulled a diaper from the bag on the desk.

  “I have other things on my mind.” Jane plopped onto the edge of the bed. “Such as wondering what’s the matter with you.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with me.”

  “Right. That’s why you look ready to bawl like a baby Missy’s age any minute.”

  Andi finished diapering her daughter and cuddled her close.

  What was wrong? The trip with Mitch. The finality of knowing they would never be together. Their arrival home to find they had to prolong their “engagement.”

  All that was too much for her. And Jane was too sharp-eyed not to notice.

  “I missed my babies,” she said honestly. “And we’ve still got so much to do to prep for the wedding.” She had received several texts with new requests from the bride yesterday.

  “I don’t buy it,” Jane said flatly. “Yes, of course, I know you missed the kids. I even believe you’d worry about Sandra. Who did happen to call this morning with an emergency since she couldn’t reach you on your cell.”

  “I forgot to turn it on earlier,” Andi said.

  “I can imagine you were too busy.”

  Ignoring her cousin’s smile, she said, “But that’s almost a relief she called here. I can’t imagine how she would feel if she couldn’t get through to someone. What did she need?”

  “Don’t worry about that right now. Tina and I took care of it. And don’t try to distract me. Andi, nothing should make you come home looking this upset after a trip with Mitch—especially considering the way you feel about him. Now, what’s going on?
”

  She sighed. Reluctantly, she confessed the rest of the plans she and Mitch had made for continuing their act. “I just don’t want to talk with Ginnie about Grant until the timing is better. She’ll have so much to take in. And now, on top of that, I’ll have to explain why Mitch and I pretended to be engaged. Once I’m back home again, I’ll sit down with her. But until then, we’re stuck in this fake engagement.”

  “I wish you luck with that one, cuz. It’s not going to be easy.”

  “No, it isn’t.” Not easy having to be around Mitch, to play his beloved bride-to-be, to have him touch her, look into her eyes, say sweet nothings as if he really loved her... She took a deep breath but couldn’t keep her voice from shaking. “We thought she’d be gone. She was supposed to be gone.”

  Her cousin’s sudden interest in arranging the strands of her silver necklace against her shirt made Andi’s stomach clench. She sank to the bed and stared at Jane, who still hadn’t looked up. “All right,” she asked, sure she didn’t want to know, “now it’s your turn. What’s going on?”

  “Grandpa didn’t tell you?”

  “No. You tell me.”

  This time, Jane sighed. “Grandpa invited Ginnie to stay for the open house.”

  * * *

  MITCH’S DAY STARTED early the next morning, with a stop at the sheriff’s office for coffee with Paco and a couple of the other deputies. He hung around long enough to keep from showing up at the Hitching Post at the crack of dawn. To delay having to face Andi. He felt sure she wouldn’t be giving him the warm welcome a genuine fiancé could expect.

  And he was right.

  As arranged, he met Cole in the hotel lobby.

  “You ready to play lumberjack?” Cole asked.

  “Hell, no. I’m just along to keep you from getting lost.”

  Cole laughed.

  In the hallway behind Cole, Mitch saw Andi round the corner from the direction of the dining room. She glanced toward them, then fled up the stairway. Mentally, he shrugged off her action. Cole hadn’t heard her approach, and with none of her family around, they had no need to stay in character.

  But the vision of her running away from him stayed in his mind all morning.

  It was nearly noon when he and Cole returned to the hotel with the freshly cut Christmas tree. At that point, Mitch had thought he was done. He hadn’t counted on Jed’s roping him in to help Cole set up the tree in the sitting room. He hadn’t counted on Tina and Jane’s insistence that the tree be turned to every possible angle so they could choose the one they liked best.