A Torey Hope Novel Series: The Complete 4-Book Box Set

by A. D. Ellis

  Dear Beth,

  I bet you laughed your ass off when you packed my clothes for me. In fact, I don’t think I even had any clothes in my wardrobe this ugly, so these hideous things must be yours. They look like something a plain Jane would wear. I still hate you.

  Audrey

  Usually, we’d work together for 3-4 hours then break for 2 hours for lunch. After lunch, I had a two hour break where I could nap, watch a few of the approved videos the center had available, write letters to my family or friends, write in my journal, read or just relax. Then, Dr. Xander would reappear from wherever he would disappear to during lunch and my two hour break, and we’d start up again, sometimes working until 7-8 pm at night. It shouldn’t have been exhausting, just sitting and talking to the doctor, but it was utterly debilitating. I’d drag myself back to my room and be asleep before my head even hit my pillow. Most of the time I was so mentally and emotionally fatigued, I would sleep straight through until my alarm. I didn’t have nightmares until the day we hit the mother lode.

  We’d been talking for about an hour. I felt like something was trying to sneak up on me. It was like I was walking and I’d hear or feel footsteps behind me, but when I’d turn around there’d be nothing. Like there was a nagging memory right there, but I was successfully dodging it. Dr. Xander realized what I was doing so he changed his questioning tactic. He asked me to tell him what had happened to me as an outsider. Instead of things happening to “me” or “I,” I was to speak in 3rd person and tell the story about “Audrey.” The change in pace and the difference in questioning threw me off just enough that I wasn’t able to sidestep the memory and it blindsided me. While, in reality, I was still sitting on Dr. Xander’s soft brown leather couch, I might as well have been standing in the middle of the interstate as a Mack truck plowed me over. I was a bloody, pulpy mess and there was no way to stop the pain, the words just poured out.

  Chapter 2

  Audrey

  Audrey is 10 years old. Her sister, Beth, is 11. Their mother, Lois, recently passed away from a massive heart attack. Their father, Captain Robert Decker, had not handled the loss of his wife well. He basically lived in an alcohol induced fog. He was present and functional, but that was about it. Beth fixed supper most nights because Robert was usually on the couch with his third or fourth beer since arriving home. Captain Decker started having ‘friends’ over not long after the girls’ mother died. They’d smoke and drink and play cards. Most of the men were kind and seemed to just feel sorry for the Captain. However, two of the men made Audrey and Beth uncomfortable. Beth would leave to go run around the base or would retreat to her bedroom to read. Audrey would stick around the men’s card game. Even though the room felt awkward, Audrey was starved for attention as a motherless ten-year old and she would take it any way she could get it. At age 10, even though she didn’t completely understand the crude words that came out of some of the men’s mouths, she could tell that they weren’t appropriate because they never used those words until Captain Decker was three sheets to the wind and had no clue what was being said around him.

  For three years, these card games with the drinking and smoking continued. Audrey had seen men come and go, although a core group remained. Audrey would bring the men new snacks or drinks or empty the ashtrays. At the age of 13, she had a bit more understanding of some of the vulgar language being used, so she’d laugh it off or ignore it when certain things were said. She didn’t love what the men said, but she wouldn’t turn down the attention either.

  One night, after emptying the ashtrays and putting the chips back into the pantry, Audrey headed to her room when she heard her dad say he was ready to call it a night. She knew that when the Captain called it a night it meant he would pass out on the couch within minutes and be useless until the morning. As she was about to slip her pajamas on, her door silently opened. Expecting to see Beth, Audrey turned. She muffled a scream into her pajama top when she saw Cal and Duke, the two men with the most vulgar words, in her room.

  “Hey there, pretty girl, we weren’t ready to leave when your dad passed out on the couch. He told us we were welcome to stay since we are such good friends of his.” This from Cal, the blond, muscular, divorced Captain. Duke, slightly smaller than Cal, yet not by much, smiled at her. Cal came across as more cold and calculating than Duke; Duke appeared to be a little nervous and embarrassed to be in her room. She wondered what Duke’s wife would think of her brown eyed husband being in a 13-year-old’s bedroom. In that split second, Audrey’s fear and nervousness morphed into an odd curiosity of what these men wanted with her. What if she threatened to tell Duke’s wife or their superior officers? With a strange feeling of calmness floating just above her apprehension, she slid her pajama top over her head and cocked her head at the men. “What are you two doing in my bedroom?”

  “We were just wondering if you need any help fighting off the boys at school.” Cal asked, “I mean, you have to be knocking them off with sticks, right?”

  When Audrey gave him a confused look, he put on a shocked face. “Are you telling me that those boys at school aren’t lined up waiting to get their hands on you?” When Audrey gave an almost imperceptible shake of her head, Cal took a step forward. “Well, that’s a damn shame, darlin’. Have you ever kissed a boy before?” Again, Audrey replied no with a slight movement of her head. Duke, who had been silent up until now, reached out and stroked her arm, “Since we are such good friends of your dad’s, would you like us to teach you how to kiss so those boys will get their heads out of their asses and start seeking you out?”

  Audrey felt like she might puke, but she also had a mystifying awareness fluttering in her stomach. These men were willing to give it all up just to kiss her? They knew their jobs and wife and futures were on the line if Audrey chose to turn them in, yet they were still standing there, offering to teach her how to attract the boys at school. With a barely there nod of her head, Cal and Duke both took steps forward as Audrey took two steps backward. “Shhh, it’s ok, sweetheart, we aren’t going to hurt you, we just want to teach you how to bring those boys to their knees. Go ahead and sit down there on the bed.”

  Cal and Duke, true to their word, didn’t hurt her. Audrey couldn’t exactly explain her feelings. She felt sick at the thought of two men her father’s age having their mouths on hers. But she also felt more in control than she ever had. She could get these men in so much trouble with one word. They would be willing to do anything she asked them to if she threatened to turn them in or tell Duke’s wife. Maybe she could put up with a little objectionable behavior if it meant she could actually control part of her life.

  After that first night, the men never came to see her together again. They took turns and would only come one or two times a month. Learning to kiss had been a real turning point for Audrey at school. The boys were now lining up to walk her to class, carry her books, hold her hand, kiss her at her locker, kiss her behind the bleachers, kiss her in the stair well, kiss her in the locker room. Audrey now had a reputation as a wonderful kisser and a sure thing when it came to making out. The boys loved her and many of the girls wanted to be her. Audrey was a quick learner and she learned what the boys wanted. Audrey’s sense of control and power grew. It doubled and quadrupled when she would see Duke’s beautiful wife around the base. He had a gorgeous wife at home, yet he was coming to HER. This knowledge went to her head and helped to sooth the feelings of wrongness that lingered there. As long as Audrey kept this under control, it wasn’t as bad as it probably seemed on the outside.

  Shortly after the kissing lessons started, Cal asked Audrey if she had ever tried to give a blowjob. Audrey knew what this was, but had never done it. So far, the boys at school had seemed satisfied with just kissing. But, she knew she’d have to up her game if she was going to keep the boys interested. With her revolting stomach almost debilitating her, Audrey let Cal give her tips and instructions as he graciously allowed her to practice on him. As Audrey shut her eyes and focused on a
nything and everything other than what she was doing, she realized that something as simple as a blowjob could basically bring a grown man to his knees. He was at her mercy. Just like Audrey wanted it. If her newly acquired skills could do this to a grown man, Audrey knew the boys at school would be putty in her hands.

  Duke soon learned of Audrey’s newest talent and of course he was more than willing to let her practice with him. Duke always made Audrey feel a little more special than Cal did. Duke would talk to her. He always seemed to feel a little guilty with what they were doing and tried to ease that guilt by being kinder to her than Cal ever was. Duke told her that she was perfect and she did things to him that his wife could never do. Audrey reveled in the heady feeling of control she had over both Cal and Duke. She was sucking a man who had a wife at home yet he’d rather be with HER than at home with his WIFE. That was heady information for an almost 14 year-old who missed her mom and had a less than stellar father.

  After Audrey turned 14, Cal mentioned something that Audrey had started wondering about. The boys at school were thrilled with her willingness to give them blowjobs. Audrey wasn’t stupid; she made sure that the boys all understood these little interactions were simply for fun and nothing more. No one was going to be her boyfriend; she had no interest in breaking couples up, although she WOULD let a girl know what was going on if push came to shove. As usual, she had the boys, just like Cal and Duke, around her little finger. She may not have been old enough to even come close to understanding the emotions involved with sex; she may not be the best lay around school. But, she was the best guaranteed blowjob and that’s all that mattered to the boys. However, some of the older boys had been pestering her to go a little farther; Audrey had been avoiding the next step for fear of it getting out of control since she was so inexperienced. So, when Cal brought it up, Audrey told him she wanted to learn what to do. In Audrey’s mind, if she could get the older boys along with the younger boys, she would be the most popular girl at school and that equated as close to love as Audrey could get to in her sad, young mind.

  Cal instructed her to remove her tank top and bra. Audrey let herself move in automatic responses, knowing that getting through this was a means to an end. She couldn’t very well attract an older boy if she didn’t know what to do with sex. Cal touched her breasts, which weren’t huge at this point, but were forming nicely. He seemed happy with them and put his mouth on them as he gruffly told her that one day, when they were fuller, the boys were going to go crazy over them. Cal moved down and licked her center which caused Audrey to stifle a sob. Cal asked if he should stop. Audrey quickly replaced the revulsion with the thoughts of what she could do with this once she knew how to do it. Since Cal was so willing, she shook her head and told him to go on. As Cal wet his fingers in his mouth, Audrey let her mind think of the last road trip her family had gone on. They had gone to an amusement park and got to rode the rides. As Cal slid first one, then two fingers inside her, Audrey swallowed a cry of pain and let her mind drift to eating cotton candy with her sister and her mom that day.

  Cal’s moans and words about her getting wet brought Audrey crashing back into reality. She let the fog clear from her head and was smacked with a realization barring on hysteria that her body was beginning to respond to Cal’s touch. Now, instead of getting lost in a fantasy of happier times, Audrey paid more attention to what her sounds and movements did to Cal. Audrey became cognizant that she could keep the upper hand in this situation simply by her responses. Cal asked if she wanted more and Audrey nodded her ascent. She had come this far, she wanted to see what she could do with the final act.

  Audrey’s fortitude was shaken to the core when Cal slipped a condom on, laid between her legs, and pushed inside. She couldn’t bite back the whimper that escaped her lips. Cal apologized, “Sorry, sweetheart, you’re just so tight. I’ll try to make it good. I just need to move a little. Are you ok with that?” Again, Audrey realized that her responses here would dictate the outcome. So, she swallowed the pain and shifted her hips. Cal groaned, “Ah, baby, you’re so good. I’ve never had anyone better.” Once again, the realization that Cal had been with his ex-wife and several other women, yet he kept coming to her, went to Audrey’s head. She could destroy Cal and he was very well aware of this fact, yet he desired HER enough to risk it. The wrongness of this was lost in her scared and messed up mind; she focused only on the power she could gain from this situation. Audrey lifted her hips to meet Cal’s movements. They found an awkward rhythm, but considering the twinge of pain Audrey still felt, she allowed that awkwardness was to be expected. After a little more practice, at least she would be more adept with this act for the boys at school. And, even if she wasn’t an expert at it, even the older boys would consider any sex to be good sex.

  Afterwards, Cal told her that the boys were going to love her for what she just did. He headed home while Audrey cleaned herself up and found some pain reliever. Audrey knew that Cal had “come” but she wondered if she was missing something because she hadn’t seen stars or anything like they described in books and movies. She was determined to keep practicing until she was better at sex so that the boys would be at her beck and call. Sex was power and power meant control.

  The next time Audrey saw Duke, she decided to put a little plan into action. He enjoyed fooling around on his wife and never turned down a blowjob, but would he stoop low enough to ‘fuck around’ on his wife? Audrey’s test would provide irrefutable proof if it turned out the way she thought it would. Duke had, once again, waited until Captain Decker was passed out on the couch and Beth had gone to the gym on base to run. He knocked silently on Audrey’s door where he found her waiting; she had known he would come, in fact, she was counting on it.

  Duke entered her room, with that sheepish look he usually wore. Audrey got the feeling that he felt like a complete dog for what he was doing, but he kept coming back to her almost as if he couldn’t resist her. She always liked it better when Duke came to her, he at least made her feel a little special for the things they did together. However, feeling special wasn’t what this was about. Today was a test.

  “Hey, Duke, did Cal tell you what I’ve been working on? No? Well, come on in, let me show you. I think you’ll like it.” Duke stood near Audrey with a look of curiosity mixed with desire. Audrey knew a few more minutes and she’d have him hooked.

  She opened her robe, exposing her breasts. As she rubbed her hands over them, she coyly glanced up at Duke to gauge his reaction. Just as she had expected, he took the bait.

  “Usually Cal touches me to get me ready, but I guess I could just touch myself. Do you think that would work?” Audrey reached down between her legs and slipped fingers into her folds. Duke’s eyes lit on fire and she watched as he tried to control his breath.

  “Do you want to help me, Duke? Or should you head home to your wife?” Audrey felt a jolt of genius at this comment that tumbled from her lips. Not only was she luring him into doing something wrong, now she was tempting him to do something doubly wrong. Sex with a teenager and cheating on his wife. Audrey knew the second he committed to doing it and she prepared for his assault as he walked toward her and pushed her back on the bed. Audrey’s satisfaction at the fact that her little experiment had worked came tumbling out as a giggle.

  Duke, as usual, was a bit gentler than Cal in all of the ways he touched her. Audrey briefly wondered why he would be here with her when he had a voluptuous wife waiting on him at home, but that thought just fueled her sense of power and she turned her attention back to Duke’s movements. His head was at her chest as his mouth sampled her then moved down to her core. He was slower than Cal, almost like an internal battle raged in him, but eventually his mouth and tongue found her and it was game on after that. Audrey basked in the triumph of knowing what she had done.

  As Duke rolled a condom on, she spread her legs. When he settled on top of her, she grasped him and moaned. That little addition was what did him in. He was lost after that and Audrey made
sure to keep that move in mind for the boys at school. Duke was bigger than Cal but she was more eager this time, so his invasion was more pleasure than pain, or at least that’s what Audrey convinced herself of. This time, unlike with Cal, Audrey paid more attention to Duke’s actions and what each one did to her body. When something felt good, Audrey was sure to let it be known so that Duke would repeat it. She realized sex was like training dogs. Let them know what you want and how to do it and they will repeat the trick over and over and be right at your feet expressing their never ending loyalty.

  Within minutes, Audrey was starting to feel something building inside. Duke pulled her leg up higher, up over his hip. This change in position nudged something and Audrey felt herself shatter. A few more thrusts and Duke groaned as he emptied himself in her.

  Within seconds, a look of panic took over Duke’s face. “Audrey, I’m so sorry. That shouldn’t have happened. I’m so sorry. Are you going to tell anyone about this?”

  Audrey smiled at Duke, “Duke, we both wanted that. I won’t tell anyone, as long as you don’t tell anyone. Oh, and you have to promise that we can do that anytime I want to. Is it a deal?” Duke paled, but nodded his head.

  And, at that moment, Audrey cemented her use of sex to gain control over any and every situation she faced.

  For the next 2 years, Audrey let Cal and Duke fuck her anytime they asked, but more often it was her seeking them out. She controlled it all, though. She determined the when and the where and the how. Audrey, who had never realized she was innocent prey, went from victim to assertive, in-charge, self-confident, and overbearing. Never claiming to be the best fuck, she knew her reputation of a quick, no strings attached fuck was what kept the boys and men coming back over and over. She knew how to use sex to control the men around her and to feel powerful herself. If someone had known what was going on, and if she had been 100% totally honest with herself, deep down, at age 14, 15, 16, she knew all of this was wrong. However, she hadn’t known how to stop it when it started, and she wasn’t sure she wanted it to stop now. So, instead of worrying about it, she made it work for her. It’s not like she could tell her dad, he had enough to worry about. Soon after her lessons with Cal and Duke, Audrey moved on to other men and boys on base. All the men and boys knew that Audrey Decker was a sure thing. It was quick and easy and she never asked for more than just hot, sweaty, fun sex. Audrey’s reputation followed her when they moved bases and she’d pick right up where she’d left off at the last base.