by Nikki Wild
Ruby René was a woman I knew many years ago. I was in my late-twenties, trying to make sense of the darkness I’d been cursed with. Every woman I dated that I’d experimented with until then became scared or turned off or accused me of horrible things, even after I’d insisted on consent. No matter how much I tried to hold myself back, I never could find someone who understood.
Those early years where full of introspection and experimentation. At one point, I’d experimented with a few escorts. I didn’t pick anyone up off the street or anything, but I knew a few colleagues that had talked about an elite agency that was very discreet and very expensive.
Ruby was one of those girls. In fact, she was one of the only women who even came close to understanding me, understanding what I needed and why. She never fully understood, but at least she’d tried. We’d had a few good nights together, but in the end, we just didn’t fit, no matter how hard she tried.
I sent her away as soon as I realized she was starting to have feelings for me.
Why in the hell she’d be sitting in that courtroom behind Rio Santiago, I had no idea. I’d not had any contact with her in years and years. I had no idea what she was doing now. The idea of her getting mixed up with a man like Santiago made my stomach churn.
She was better than that.
I turned everything off with a heavy sigh, filled with even more questions as I left the office for the day.
Beauty was waiting at home.
Her sweet embrace would greet me at the door and I’d melt into her.
I drove a little faster than I usually would and made it home in record time.
Chloe
“No, I haven’t seen him again,” I said to my mother, my shoulder pressing the phone to my ear as I finished the seam on a dress I was working on. “And thank God for that.”
“I can’t believe he had the nerve to approach you like that.”
“Well, at least he waited till the day after my wedding to freak me out.”
“He shouldn’t have contacted you at all. If he wants to talk to you, he should go through me.”
“Mom, I’m adult,” I said. “I’m sure he knows you hate him.”
“Of course he does,” she said. “But still…”
“You can’t control the entire world, Mom,” I said, knowing it was eating her up. “But don’t worry, if he shows up again, I can handle him. He caught me off guard the first time, but I’ve had time to think about how to handle it now. I’m prepared.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Well, I’ll march right up to him and calmly tell him I have absolute no interest in having any type of relationship with him and politely ask him never to contact me again.”
“That’s very mature of you,” she said.
“Is it? I do feel like I’m growing up,” I said, cutting the thread and turning off the sewing machine. I grabbed the phone from my shoulder and walked into the kitchen.
I was starving again, just like always. I was starting to show a little now and I wasn’t sure if it was from all the pasta and pizza I’d been consuming or the tiny human growing inside of me.
“You’re growing up a lot faster than I expected,” she said, her voice sounding almost wistful.
“Mom, are you getting sentimental in your old age?”
“Don’t be absurd,” she bristled. I couldn’t help but smile.
“You’re going to be a grandma soon, you have to soften up a little.”
“I don’t have to do any such thing,” she laughed.
“It may just be another one of those things you don’t have any control over,” I teased.
“Are you trying to send me to an early death, Chloe? You know that’s my weakness.”
“You should try relinquishing control every now and then, Mom, you might find you like it.”
“I doubt that,” she said. I could feel her eyebrow raise over the phone. She was so predictable, so set in her ways, I knew she’d never change but it was fun to tease her about it.
Our relationship had taken an interesting turn these days. Now that she’d accepted my relationship with Bear and that we were having a baby, it was almost like we could be friends instead of the constant pull that existed in our screwed up mother-daughter relationship.
It was nice.
In small amounts.
“I gotta go, Mom,” I said. “I have to make my second lunch and then start dinner.”
“Eating for two these days?”
“I think it’s more like eating for two dozen,” I said.
“Well, eat healthy stuff, the baby needs its nutrients.”
“I know, Mom…”
“Okay, I’ll let you go. You know where I am if you need me. I love you, Chloe.”
“I love you, too, Mom.”
That was new too. Declarations of love used to be rare and now she never ended a conversation without it.
I guess that was nice too.
My phone rang while I was making a sandwich. I looked down at my phone and grinned when I saw my handsome husband’s face staring up at me.
“Hey babe,” I answered.
“Hello, my love. How are you feeling?”
“I’m good. Hungry, making a sandwich right now.”
“If you want we can go out to dinner tonight,” he said.
“I’d rather order in, is that okay?”
“Of course, love. Listen, I’m calling because I have to make a stop before I get home. I’ll be an hour or so late. Do you need anything?”
“Not that I can think of.”
“Okay, love, see you soon. Oh, and Chloe?”
“Yes?”
“Put the remote control vibrator in, would you?”
“Can I eat my sandwich first?” I laughed.
“You have fifteen minutes before your first zap,” he said.
“Okay, okay…”
“Good girl. See you in an hour. Love you.”
“Love you,” I replied, shaking my head as I hung up the phone.
Hurriedly, I finished my lunch. By the time I was finished, I was already wet just thinking about what was coming….
Bear
I’d left the office and sat in the back of the car on the way home, thinking about Bruce and trying to figure out my next steps. The thing is, I needed more information from people who were there at the time.
“Hey, Max,” I said, rolling down the dividing window. “Can you take me to the District Attorney’s office? It’s on Hogan Place, over by Columbus Park.”
“Sure,” he said, turning the car around.
I called Chloe to let her know I was going to be late and then looked up information on the current District Attorney. Lacey Vance had been appointed by the governor after Bruce left and then elected permanently into the position later. She’d worked under Bruce for years and I couldn’t find anything indicating she’d worked on the Santiago case, but I figured if I could meet with her for a few minutes, it might help.
It took a bit of work. Her receptionist was a tough older lady that I could tell wasn’t in the habit of letting people walk off the street and gain access to her boss. She recognized me right away though and that helped. I charmed her with compliments and when the DA walked by, she waved her over and introduced us.
“Mr. Dalton, nice to meet you,” she said. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“Well, don’t believe everything you read,” I said, winking at her. Lacey Vance was a buttoned-up blonde with her hair pulled back in a severe ponytail. Her smile was as tight as her suit.
“Actually, most of what I’ve heard came from Bruce,” she said.
I laughed and shook my head.
“Well, in that case, maybe I should start by apologizing for any stories you might have heard.”
“It’s not all bad,” she said. “Why don’t you come into my office? I have a few minutes before my next meeting.”
Her’s was the biggest corner office on the floor and she closed the door behind u
s, sitting at her desk. I looked around, realizing I was sitting in Bruce’s old office.
“What brings you here today, Mr. Dalton? I certainly hope you’re not in any legal trouble.”
“Oh, no, not at all.”
“That’s good to hear,” she said, smiling again. She looked younger when she smiled.
“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about Bruce.”
“I was so sorry to hear of his passing,” she said, shooting me a sympathetic glance.
“Thank you,” I said.
“The papers reported it was a suicide.”
“Yes, they did,” I said. “The coroner came to that conclusion, but I’m not entirely sure that’s the case.”
“Why not?”
I peered at her, trying to decide if I could trust her or not. I decided to play it safe for now.
“It’s just a feeling I have. Bruce and I were very close and I know he would have reached out to me if something was bothering him.”
“Everyone handles depression differently, Mr. Dalton.”
“I understand that but you knew Bruce, too. He was gregarious, full of life. None of this makes sense.”
“The Bruce that I knew was tense and irritable,” she said.
“Well, yes, and overworked. But since he gave up the DA position, he’d really gotten back to his old self. He was shaking all of that. Did you have any contact with him after he left the department?”
“No.” Her reply was firm and ended with her pressing her lips together defiantly. She crossed her arms and sat back in her chair.
“No?” I asked. “Do you know if he had contact with anyone else here?”
“How would I know? Not to my knowledge…”
Bruce had been isolated up there at the cabin and he’d avoided talking about work at all once he’d left, but I always assumed he’d stayed in touch with some of his colleagues. Maybe I was wrong.
“Were you and Bruce close, Ms. Vance?”
“We worked side by side for many years, Mr. Dalton.”
“Is that a yes?”
“Not to be rude, Mr. Dalton, but why are you asking all of these questions? Why now?”
“I’m just trying to get some insight into my friend’s death. That’s all. Did you work on his last case with him?”
“I don’t really remember…”
“How could you not remember?” I asked. “The Santiago case. It was huge. Bruce was devastated that Santiago only got a few years time. Even I remember that.”
“Yes, of course,” she said, with a dismissive wave.
“Was there anything in that case that might have put Bruce in danger?”
Her eyes widened and then she quickly looked away. She put a hand on her neck and shook her head, replying without looking at me.
“Of course not.”
“I see,” I said, doing my best to feel her out. Something wasn’t right here and my intuition was telling me to dig deeper. But I could tell by the set of her jaw that I wasn’t going to get anything out of her.
“Well, thank you for your time,” I said, standing up. Relief flooded her face.
“Yes, I have a meeting soon,” she said, walking me to the door. “It was nice to meet you, Mr. Dalton.”
“Yes, nice to meet you, too.” She was closing her office door when I turned back to her.
“Ms. Vance..or is it Mrs?”
“Mrs.”
“Mrs. Vance, one more question. Do you recall Santiago ever mentioning a woman named Rube René?
“I really can’t discuss the specifics of a case with you, Mr. Dalton.”
“Of course, I understand. May I call on you again? In case I have more questions.”
“Absolutely, Mr. Dalton. Have a good day.”
She closed the door firmly, leaving me and my uneasy feelings solidly on the other side.
Chloe
Violet Balducci was a force of nature. Tall, statuesque, with a take-no-prisoners attitude. As soon as she walked into the penthouse and shook my hand with a firmer than necessary handshake, I decided I liked her. She launched into a discussion right away, asking me a million questions about what I expected from my new venture.
She asked questions I’d never even though of and it made me feel even more inexperienced. But we worked through them all, and by the end, we’d come up with a plan of action.
The best part? She was going to take care of everything. I’d make all the bigger important decisions, but with her taking care of the business aspect, it allowed me more time to focus on the creative stuff.
Which is exactly how I wanted things.
“Chloe,” she promised, “I am going to put everything I have into making this a success. I think you’ll be quite pleased.”
“I already am!” I said. “Thank you so much, Violet.”
“It’s my pleasure! Bear’s one of my favorite people in the world and I’m so pleased he’s found such a lovely wife.”
“Oh, thank you, that’s very nice of you to say,” I said, a flush running up my neck.
“So, when are you due?”
“Late July,” I said. “We still have a few months and a lot of work to do in the meantime.”
“Well, I’ll take the heavy lifting and you just work on those creative decisions.”
“Will do,” I said, running through my assigned tasks in my head. The first thing I had to do was come up with a name. The fact that I’d not done that yet was ridiculous, I know. I was just so indecisive about it and I kept coming up with ideas and rejecting them. Nothing was sticking. I’d enlisted Bear’s help, but so far he’d not provided any acceptable options, either. I knew when the time was right, the perfect name would come to me.
Violet left in the early afternoon, our meeting taking up most of my day. I spent the rest of the afternoon working alone, finishing up sketches and working up new patterns. I had a team of seamstresses coming in tomorrow to start work on creating a small inventory from the patterns.
I sat out on the terrace, sipping tea and contemplating all the work I had to do. I still had to finish the nursery, too. All the furnishings were being delivered in a couple of days.
Bear and I had gone to see Dr. Reynolds a few days ago and everything was moving along perfectly with the pregnancy. Lying there with him holding my hand while they were doing the sonogram had been amazing. Hearing the baby’s heartbeat, seeing her face…it sent tears flowing down both of our faces.
I was still calling her a ‘she’ even though we couldn’t determine the sex for sure during the sonogram. We were going to try again soon, but I’d never had such a strong feeling about something before, I just knew she was a girl. We’d left the doctor’s office full of joy, and as usual, talking about how crazy it was that we’d done a complete one-eighty about having children. Seeing the realness on that sonogram screen only made us more ecstatic about it.
Although Bear had been a bit distracted since we’d arrived home from our honeymoon, he was still going out of his way to make sure I had everything I needed, that I was feeling strong, eating healthy and not taking on too much. He was treating me like I was made of glass these days, which was totally unnecessary. I’d never felt stronger.
To be honest, it was him that I was worried about. His grief seemed to have returned once we’d gotten back home, and I was back to trying to make it a little better each day.
I was completely ignoring the issue with Randy. I really didn’t want him in my life, but I was curious to hear what he had to say. Not curious enough to try to contact him, but it was there. Thankfully, he’d not come around again and I was happy for that because it was one less thing I needed to think about.
We were both dealing with a lot of changes and both overwhelmed, but all in all, I think we were handling the load decently.
Our future looked bright. Our love was strong.
Even though everything was a work-in-progress, I felt invincible.
Bear
My meeting with Lacey Vance had left a
bad taste in my mouth. Something wasn’t right and after seeing the way she’d blown me off, I was even more sure of it now.
Luckily, I had other resources.
First of all, I’d not finished going through Bruce’s journals. After a lovely dinner with my beautiful bride, I locked myself up in my library and pulled them out again. The flames of the fire I’d made earlier flickered beside me as I slowly sipped my whiskey and read the private words of my best friend.
I picked up where I’d left off previously, but it was obvious that Bruce had quickly become disenchanted with his work.
Being an ADA isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. I think I’m gaining ground, showing the DA that I can do the work, that I’m willing to go the extra mile, but it’s a competitive office and all the other ADA’s are showing just as much initiative. Of course, that just means I have to work even harder, and longer hours, and I think it’s starting to get to me. I’m so fucking exhausted and there just aren’t enough hours in my days. What I’d give for a nice run on some fresh slopes right now…
I fucked up. I missed a filing deadline and now I look like an incompetent fool. I’m going to have to work even harder to show the DA that he didn’t make a mistake appointing me to this position….
I skipped through the entries, flipping through to later ones that were written a few years later.
I hate elections. They’re so nasty, especially this one. My opponent thinks he’s going to win, but I’m not so sure. I’m getting a lot of good feedback from everyone in the office and I’m pretty sure the outgoing DA wants it to be me. Time will tell, I guess. Just a few more weeks until election night…
I couldn’t help but smile. I remembered all the stress he was under back then, trying so hard to win over the vote of every single person he crossed paths with. It worked.
I won! I won! I won! I’m elated…and very drunk after celebrating with Bear all night. My opponent was actually a gracious loser, which I was happy to see. Now, I’ll have the power I’ve always wanted, the power to make changes, to make the world a better place. All those long nights working have finally paid off. I can’t fucking believe it…