Blind Devotion (Steel Jackals MC Book 1)

by Nancy Haviland

  “More?” she asked, pressing her hands tighter to her chest so he wouldn’t see them shaking. His hooded gaze passed over her plain black thong a few times as it roamed the length of her body.

  “Shh.” He stretched the sound out and continued to take her in from her head to her toes, a predatory gleam lightening his gold eyes. “You’re un-fuckin’-believable. Drop your hands for me.”

  It took her a few seconds before she could. But after bringing her arms to her sides and clenching and unclenching her fists, unsure what to do with them, she brought them back up as a makeshift bra.

  His face softened. “Such a sweet little thing.”

  She dropped her eyes and chewed on her lip, feeling anxious at the thought of baring herself completely. “Should I continue?”

  “No.”

  The harsh tone had her head coming back up. It seemed to have come from someone else. Someone dark and dangerous. Someone she should run from. She didn’t. She simply continued to stand there while the man she loved looked her over. Never had she been more thankful she didn’t suffer from body issues. Not that she thought she was perfect; her hips were a little wide, her thighs too soft, her breasts a smidge too small. But she’d never dwelled on any of it. She’d been too busy focusing on more important things. Her education. Budgeting to make sure she could afford tuition. Finding jobs that didn’t interfere with her studies. Making a better life for herself because she knew no one else was going to do it for her.

  “Turn.”

  She turned.

  “Slowly,” he barked, sounding vicious.

  She shivered and smiled, loving that she was able to bring that fierceness out in him, and he saw that when she eventually came back around to face him.

  “You enjoying yourself, Tish? Feels good to light a man up, huh? You wait till I get my hands on you. I’ll show you what lit up feels like. I’m gonna make you fuckin’ glow, little girl.”

  “Now?” she asked, so hopeful. She checked to make sure he was ready, and quaked inside when she noted his erection looked bigger than it had a few minutes ago. She couldn’t take her eyes off it. Until he moved.

  “Not yet.” He licked his lips as he approached her. “I have to do something I should have done before things got this far. Goes to show what an asshole I am that I neglected the first thing they teach in Seduce the Virgin 101. Now, give me that fuckin’ mouth I’ve been dying to taste.”

  He reached her, and she stood on her toes to offer herself to him without hesitating.

  He briefly continued to torment her by pulling his head back so he remained just out of her reach. “Such a good little listener,” he mused, right before he jerked her against him and sealed his warm mouth to hers.

  Tish could count on her fingers how many times she’d been kissed, but none of those unmemorable lip locks could have prepared her for what Josh did to her then. He used his hands and lips and tongue to deliver assault after assault on her senses. He grasped her jaw and squeezed lightly to pop it open, then invaded her mouth like an expert. He thrust in and their tongues tangled, rolling playfully before he dominated by capturing hers between his teeth. He sucked gently and repeatedly, and all she could think was how badly she wanted him doing that to other areas of her body. Her moan disappeared down his throat but was followed by another almost immediately when his taste registered. He was rich and too decadent for a man who rode a Harley and wore a cut that scared the shit out of most people.

  Forgetting modesty, Tish tugged at her hands that were trapped between them and finally, greedily touched all that had seemed forever out of her reach. Josh made a pleasured sound when her bare breasts pressed into his chest. It matched the high-pitched one she made for the same reason. He cupped the exposed globes of her ass and kneaded them as he ground that titanium bulge against her belly.

  “Jesus,” she panted when he dragged his lips over to nibble and lick at the corner of her mouth. “I knew you’d be like this. You’re so perfect for me.”

  “So wrong for you,” he corrected as his hold on her tightened. “But it’s too late for regrets now. Your ass is fuckin’ prime. Can’t wait to sink my teeth into it.” He let go of one cheek and worked his hand between them to get at her breast. When he plucked at her nipple, her nails sunk into his shoulders. “Goddammit, Tish. It’s way too late because I changed my fuckin’ mind. Just like I knew I would once I touched you.” Remorse flashed across his face but left as quickly as it had appeared.

  She wasn’t sure what he’d changed his mind about and didn’t care right then. “Good. Can I play first? I want to see you. I need to touch you.” She pressed her belly into that rigid pole that was sandwiched between them to make sure he knew what she was asking for. “I’ve waited longer than you have,” she snuck in when it looked as though he was about to refuse her.

  “Loyalty,” he whispered before kissing her softly. “It’s a beautiful thing. Thank you.”

  “Welcome. So, can I?”

  His lips curved. “You want my cock, babe?”

  She nodded.

  “You’re getting it. I’m too weak to keep it out of you, so I’m taking this mouth as mine. Any objection to that?”

  “None.” Zip. Zilch. Nada.

  A pained look crossed his face. “You should object. You should object to the point where you knee me in the balls and bruise my dick.”

  She shook her head and dropped her eyes to the tip of his goatee that was a little longer than the rest of it, admitting, “I’d rather put it in my mouth. I want to feel what happens to you when I suck on it.” I want to make you come. Then I want to swallow it and enjoy the satisfaction of knowing it was me who brought you to the point where you lost control, she added in her head, too shy to say it out loud.

  He looked at her for an extended second, then seemed to give up. “Fuck it,” he muttered before gifting her with another ravenous kiss that made her head spin with lust. “You sure you wanna go first?” he asked when he allowed her to breathe again.

  “Yes, Josh.”

  “Fine. Will it offend you if I order you to your knees?”

  She all but collapsed to the floor as her answer, partly from weakness, but mostly with anticipation. The coarse fibers of the rug scratched at her skin, but she barely felt them. Having seen movies and gifs showing girls giving blowjobs, she couldn’t believe she was finally going to join the ranks. She swiftly opened his belt and pants, and, burrowing in with her embarrassingly eager hand, she found he was swinging free and clear of any underwear. Naughty boy. Her fingers closed around what could only be described as hot, hard, and intimidating, and she glanced up when Josh hissed and slammed his forearm on the wall at her back. He rested his head on it as he watched her pull his cock out, his mouth open, his lips wet, chest rising and falling swiftly.

  She dropped her gaze from cataloging his beautiful reaction to her careful touch and drew in a thoroughly impressed breath that ended with a quiet, “Oh, God, yes.” His cock was thick and veiny. It was hard as stone and topped with a helmet that was shiny and darker in color than the rest of it. Incredible. It wasn’t obscenely long, unless one considered seven or eight inches obscenely long, which she did because anything would be to her. But it was his girth that held her attention, and made her pussy clench reflexively, begging to be used. This thing would tear her apart if he ever agreed to fuck her. Please agree to fuck me, she pleaded silently.

  “It shouldn’t be going down like this. It’s happening in the wrong order.” Josh brought her face up by cupping her jaw. Her eyes stayed on his cock until the very last second. “All wrong. For starters, it should be me at your feet. Always.”

  She pulled out of his hold and shook her head, readying to lose her shit if he tried to stop her now. Rising up on her knees before he could, she excitedly wrapped both hands around him. She balked at the space that remained between her fingers and thumbs, then laughed, the sound uneasy. “You’re fucking massive.” Why not be honest? She extended her tongue, unable to wa
it, and licked around the soft cockhead. Moaning, she dabbed at the bead of moisture at his tip and felt him ripple and jump against her palms. “Mmm, and so delicious.” She’d waited for this for so long, dreamed of it night after night, so giving up on talking, she began sucking her first cock.

  She’d always thought she’d perform the act by remembering how she’d seen other women do it in the different forms of media she’d watched. That wasn’t the case. She simply did Josh with no thought but one. Pleasing him. She licked down the thick vein that ran along the front and felt something inside her warm when he settled a gentle hand on her head. Up she came, nibbling and licking and sucking gently, unsure how rambunctious she could get away with being. She felt…gluttonous, and she wanted to show it but, again, wasn’t brave enough.

  When she reached the top, she locked eyes with him and opened as wide as she could to take him as deep as possible. Her pussy spasmed with jealousy.

  Josh’s focus was centered directly on her, his face taut as he murmured under his breath something she couldn’t hear. His eyes rolled slightly, and she increased her suction. She wanted him to enjoy this. To remember it. To crave it from her. She wanted to push him beyond a blowjob. She wanted to have sex with him, to connect with him. Their bodies, yes, but on a deeper level. One he’d never reached with any other woman.

  But how awful that she was thinking to seduce him into doing something he didn’t want to do.

  Awful or not, she proceeded to tempt him by swirling her tongue around the head of his cock a few times before tightening her lips just below the ridge. He grunted when she pulled up slowly, which squeezed the pliable, spongy helmet until it popped free with a wet sound. She moaned her pleasure to let him know she was having fun with her new toy.

  “Jesus Christ, Tish. Why am I letting you do this to me?”

  “Because I need it,” she supplied before getting serious by opening and sliding further down his length to begin a steady, snug bob he seemed to enjoy if his raspy breaths were anything to go by. Wanting more, she fisted him at the base, sent her other hand under so she could feel the heaviness of his balls, then took him so far into her mouth it brought him butting up against the back of her throat. Naturally, because she’d never had anything so bulbous back there, she gagged.

  “Oh, fuck yeah. Eyes up here. Show me,” he demanded roughly. “Show me how my cock tickling that throat makes those baby blues water.” She did, and he traced around her stretched lips with the pad of his thumb. “Incredible sight. You like it, Tish? Do you like being on my cock?”

  She nodded. “Mhm.”

  “Then I’m done holding back.”

  She popped her lips off. “It’s about time,” she said before licking him from bottom to top and taking him back in her mouth.

  He chuckled. “Just remember, you granted permission.”

  She sucked harder, and when his humor fled, she braced herself for him to come at her no holds barred.

  But he just sluiced his fingers through her hair and used the hold to move her head forward and back, smoothly thrusting into her mouth. “I dreamed this shit so many times this past year,” he said. “Made me feel like a fuckin’ slimeball, but I still had you on your knees every goddamn night. Will you be afraid if I fuck your mouth for real?”

  She slowly slid him out of her. “Will you hurt me?” She swallowed her thickened saliva and could barely talk around the joy bursting through her because he’d just admitted to having fantasized about her, in the same way she’d done about him.

  “No, babe. Never.”

  She nodded, settled back with her ass on her feet and her palms on her thighs, and opened her mouth. She couldn’t get much more accommodating than that.

  “I swear to fuck you’re somewhere in my goddamn head.” He firmed the grip he had on her hair and roughly fisted his shaft. He stroked it a few times in a way that let her know she’d been too gentle with him. He pushed past her lips and slid over her tongue. “You take a breath when I stroke out, because when I get right in there, you’re gonna feel like I’m suffocating you. Understand? I’m going as far as your hot little throat will take me.”

  She offered her permission by bringing her hands up and holding snug around the backs of his thighs. And he did indeed frighten her by plunging deep; she felt it throughout her entire body. Her jaw protested his size, her gag reflex the hard nudge. Her stomach muscles seized through the retch, but he kept the pressure on until he made it past the barrier trying to deny him entry. Once in, with her nails digging into the firm muscles of his legs, he started to work his length in and out with short strokes that soon became long and roomy. He allowed her a sharp breath when he drew out, then cut her off again when he buried himself to the root. He came out; she breathed, he thrust in balls deep.

  “That’s my girl. An A fuckin’ student, so sweet and tight. You okay, babe?”

  She slipped a hand around and cupped his balls, rolling them to let him know she was more than okay. She was fucking fascinated by what they were doing.

  He cursed and began thrust over and over without a break, finding and keeping to a steady, unhurried rhythm that she soon, miraculously, got used to. The tension left her body, and she was able to enjoy the unfamiliar invasion. All of it was so fucking dirty. The hardness of his shaft dragging through her lips and impaling her, the scent of leather, soap, and man, the wet sound of her throat accepting it’s first fucking. And the intense pleasure on Josh’s face, the low, rough grunts coming from his throat? Sexy didn’t even come close. She had to squeeze her knees together to quell the desperate throbbing in her pussy. If she had a little more confidence, she could have used her fingers to make herself come to take the edge off.

  He pulled out and she peeked down at his soaked cock glistening with her saliva.

  “Look at me while I claim you. I don’t give a fuck that this isn’t your pussy, what we’re doing here changes everything.” He cupped the side of her face and swept his thumb over her cheekbone. “My sweet, innocent Tish. You waited for me because you want to be mine? Well, now you are.” He pushed into her mouth again and kept going until his balls met her chin. Their gazes remained locked. “Mine. To protect and care for. To fuck and show off. To choke with my cock if I want to. Yes?”

  She closed her eyes against the dizziness edging in. The moment the connection between them was broken, he slid his length out. She coughed and gasped for air.

  “Give me back those eyes.” His voice was right at her ear.

  When she forced her lids up, he took her mouth. The kiss was him staking a claim with a brutal demand that she surrender. He ate at her, slowly and thoroughly until she felt needier than ever. She pulled at his thick arms to bring him closer.

  “Yes?” he repeated as their lips clung until the very last second.

  “Yes, please,” she whispered hoarsely.

  “Will you always be so accommodating? Open, babe.” She opened as he straightened, and she eagerly accepted him when he fed himself back into her. His stroke was smooth and shallow this time, with just his cockhead filling her mouth.

  Something hit the door. “Tish!”

  Tish jumped out of her skin and tried to spit Josh out, but even though she jerked and yanked at her head, he held fast and kept her right where he wanted her. On her knees at his feet, her mouth full of his cock, while her mother, the woman who’d sent him to prison, stood behind a thin panel of wood less than ten feet away.

  SIX

  After a brief but deadly glare aimed at the bedroom door, Josh brought his attention back and suddenly appeared totally unconcerned that his best friend’s stepsister was interrupting her daughter giving him head.

  “Ignore it. That’s beyond what’s happening here. It has no place in our private time, and I won’t be happy if you give it one.”

  It took Tish only seconds to agree. All she had to do was remember Rachel’s telling of how she’d stood back and allowed Josh to take responsibility for her selfish, harmful habit and T
ish was back with him. She showed Josh they were on the same page by relaxing her jaw and stroking her tongue lightly around the underside of his shaft.

  “Yeah, babe. Just like that. You keep your attention where it’s meant to be.” He slid his hand down so he was gripping her nape, and with the other, he pointed two ringed and tattooed fingers at his eyes. “Right here. We’re right here. You and me.”

  “Tish!”

  Her mother again. She was trashed. So trashed that Tish’s name had come out sounding more like air escaping from a hole in a tire.

  “C’mon. ’M hun’ry. C’me make me su’ food.”

  That had Josh’s mouth tightening into a firm, angry line. His body rippled with a surge of power that left Tish’s skin tingling. “Your daughter’s busy, Rachel,” he said loudly, his deep voice bouncing around the walls. “Fuck off and let me enjoy her. She’s not your slave anymore.” He continued to hold Tish’s gaze as he slid that smooth helmet all around her mouth. “She’s mine.” He paired his dark whisper with his hand coming to rest on her throat, his fingers splayed and pointed down.

  Her mother didn’t say another word as she wandered away, sporadic thuds sounding to signify she was bumping into the walls. She didn’t care that Tish was in her bedroom with a man. Had she even recognized Josh’s voice?

  “Such a good, good girl,” he rumbled for her now, making her heart sing because she was pleasing him. She soon forgot the interruption and began enjoying what she was doing again.

  Her eyes were sliding closed so she could savor the feel of him, so she’d always remember this first time, this first act they were sharing as lovers—

  His grip on her throat tightened. “Don’t shut me out by closing your eyes. I’m not gonna tell you that again. I need that connection. I’ve avoided meeting another person’s stare head-on for years. Inside, it’s a sign of aggression. Something I finally got smart about and put away for a while.” He unexpectedly pushed through that ring again and seemed to be feeling his length with his fingers on the outside of her neck. Out he came to allow her some air. “More than seven hundred days have passed since you looked at me like this. And to do it while I slide my cock into your mouth; any idea how blown away I am by that?” He shook his head. “Do not leave me out here alone by closing your eyes to the sight of us.”