Standing, I put some distance between us because I didn’t want to give in to the temptation to grab Chelsea, pull her into my arms, and try to make her forget her reasons we couldn’t make things work between us. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us, and it certainly wouldn’t be fair to Haley.
“I love you, Chels,” I said, refusing to leave without telling her the whole truth. “When I dream of my future, you’re by my side. I see us having decades to love each other, and I don’t want to lose that. I know you’re scared, but I think you’d be a wonderful mother.”
Chelsea looked like she was about to cry. When I took a step toward her, she backed away. “Just give me some time, Luke,” she pleaded. “I love you, too, but I need to work through this without being distracted by how good you make me feel.”
I nodded and proved I loved her by walking out her door, hating the fact that the first time Chelsea admitted to loving me was also the day she told me we might have no future together.
Chapter Forty
Chelsea
After two fitful nights of tossing and turning and mulling over my many regrets about sending Luke away, I was exhausted. I was also no closer to deciding what I wanted to do about our relationship. Saturday had been so busy at the studio, I’d had little time to dwell on my problems. Sunday, I was going to be home alone, meaning it was going to be a rough day.
When my doorbell rang a little past noon, I was expecting to find Luke on the other side, him having spent the previous day coming up with arguments for the many reasons we should work things out. To be honest, I’d been shocked by Luke’s lack of communication since he’d left. While we’d texted back and forth a few times, those texts had been casual with none of the teasing they normally had.
I’d been worried after he’d left, so I’d sent a text asking if he was all right. He’d assured me he was doing okay and asked how I was. I’d lied and told him I was fine and then been honest and told him I missed him. In response, he’d told me to call any time I wanted company, quickly following up with another text promising not to come by unless I invited him. Still, I figured he’d break that promise, eventually. As I hurried to the door, I was trying to figure out what excuse he’d use for stopping by. Naturally, I looked through the peephole, even though I was pretty sure it was Luke. Jason hadn’t been a problem since Luke had driven him home from my studio, but I’d had him show up drunk enough times to make me cautious of unexpected visitors. Jason had no problem getting drunk before noon.
Seeing my mom on my front step came as a surprise since she hadn’t mentioned anything about coming by for a visit.
“Hi, Mom,” I greeted her, immediately reaching out to take some of the shopping bags she was loaded down with. “I didn’t know you were stopping by.”
“I’m glad you’re here,” she told me, following me in with her bags. “I wasn’t sure if you’d be over at Luke’s, but I figured if you weren’t home, I’d just use my key and set these in your front room.”
“What is all this stuff?” I asked, eying the six cloth bags my mother had shown up with.
“Stuff for Haley,” she announced. “I’ve got a few more things in the car. Is Luke here? Maybe he can move the heavier stuff. I took the RAV4 so I’d have enough room for everything.”
“Heavier stuff?” I asked, not understanding why my mom had so much stuff with her.
“The stroller and the car seat,” she explained. “When I asked Luke about registering for the baby, he seemed overwhelmed and told me he’d be happy with any gift I bought. I know he’s only got a few things so far, and that baby will be here soon. They had some adorable cribs, but I figured it would be better if the two of you picked that out so you can decorate the nursery. I also wasn’t sure what kind of space you’d have. Now, is Luke around to help unload baby stuff?”
My head was spinning. While my mom was known to get excited about things, I’d never seen her get this excited about someone else’s baby, which is when it hit me. “You’re in full on grandma mode, aren’t you?”
My mother hugged me and sighed. “I can’t wait to hold her,” she admitted, and I was a little jealous.
It was insane to realize I was jealous of my mother’s excitement about Haley. If I could feel that level of excitement, things would be fine with Luke.
“Luke isn’t here,” I said around a sniffle, and my mom frowned.
“What happened?” she asked.
“I don’t know if I want to be more than the fun aunt in Haley’s life,” I admitted. “I told Luke I need time to think about what I want as far as involvement in his and Haley’s life.”
“You’re not excited about Haley, are you?” she asked, giving my hand a comforting squeeze.
I shook my head. “You just came in here with bags of baby stuff, and I have no interest in looking at any of it. I got more excited shopping for cat toys last weekend than I did looking at baby clothes with Brook and Delaney. I’m not sure I’ll ever be mommy material.”
My mom laughed and shook her head. “Have a seat,” she said, pointing to my loveseat. “We need to have a serious talk.”
We both took our seats, me on the loveseat and my mom in her favorite armchair.
“Did I ever tell you how I found out I was pregnant with you?” she asked.
“You threw up in Kmart,” I replied. “Afterward, you accused Dad of making you sick by taking you to Kmart, and you haven’t been in one since that day.”
“That’s part of the story,” she agreed. “That wasn’t my first pregnancy. I got pregnant the first time when I was dating your father, shortly before we got engaged. He was thrilled, talking about baby names and our wonderful life together.”
“So, you were both excited about starting a family,” I deduced.
My mother shook her head. “No. I was definitely not excited about starting a family. I loved your dad, and I knew I wanted to get married, but I still wasn’t sure I wanted to be a mother. When I miscarried, I had a lot of guilt because I didn’t feel as strongly about it as your dad did. I’d never bonded with that baby, and while there was a part of me that was sad, mostly, I was glad I wasn’t going to have a baby.”
I nodded my understanding. “That makes sense. I’m not sure how I would feel if I got pregnant. So, what you’re telling me is that you didn’t want to be a mom then, but it didn’t prevent you from wanting to be a mom later?”
“Not exactly,” she replied. “You weren’t planned either. I’d been on antibiotics, and my birth control failed that month. I wasn’t excited about being pregnant with you.”
Her confession shocked me, and I might have even been hurt if it weren’t for the fact that my mom had always been loving and supportive. There’d never been a time when I hadn’t felt wanted by her. I knew for a fact my mom loved me.
“This isn’t the same as what’s going on with Luke,” I argued.
“I know it’s not,” she agreed. “I’m merely referring to the fears you have about not wanting to be a mom. As you can see, I changed my mind.”
“You had a lot longer to come to terms with it,” I pointed out. “By the time I was born, you were excited about having a baby. I don’t have several months to get used to it.”
“I still didn’t like the idea of being a mother when I went to the hospital to have you,” she insisted.
“Really?” I asked.
“It’s the truth,” she assured me. “Chelsea, you are a loving woman who is already planning to help Luke with Haley and spend time with her. There is no reason to assume you won’t want to be a bigger part of her life. It’s scary being a mom. When you’re considering it, there’s this huge responsibility you’re agreeing to take on and all these fears of making mistakes. Trust me when I tell you that you will make mistakes no matter how good you are. Now, come help me carry this other stuff in.”
Nearly twelve hours later, my living room was covered in baby items, which I was currently going through with my mom. It wasn’t just the stuff she’d brought over that
morning. After looking through her bags, I’d suddenly felt the need to shop, as well. At the moment, we were celebrating having mastered the baby wrap.
“That is adorable!” my mom exclaimed, pulling out her phone to take a picture of me wearing a teddy bear in a baby wrap. We’d tried getting Tasha in the baby wrap, but she’d had no interest in playing baby for us. She had stolen a pair of booties with bells on them and run off to play with them alone.
“What are you going to do with that picture, Mom?” I demanded.
“Send it to your grandmother, of course,” she replied.
I giggled, thinking about how this would inspire my grandmother to start her own shopping spree. “Luke is going to be sick of pink.”
“That’s all on you,” my mom reminded me. “I tried to stick to other colors.”
“How could I resist these adorable pink outfits?” I asked, gesturing around the room. “We’re having a little girl!”
My mouth dropped open, realizing what I’d just said, and my mom’s grin proved she’d picked up on the significance of my words, too.
“I need to talk to Luke,” I said excitedly before looking at the time and sighing. It was already after ten, and Luke had his meeting with his dad early in the morning. “I suppose it will have to wait until tomorrow.”
My mom nodded and patted my hand. “I’d better get home.”
I wrapped her in a tight hug, squishing the teddy bear between us. “Thanks, Mom.” My voice was slightly choked as I spoke. “You always know how to help me.”
She hugged me back and stroked my hair, like she used to do when I was a little girl. “That’s why you’ll be a great mom—you had me for an example. Go make Luke’s day tomorrow.”
“I will,” I assured her as I walked her to the door.
When I settled into bed that night with Tasha snuggled in at my side, I was able to let out a contented sigh. While I realized things weren’t going to be easy, I was certain things were going to work out just fine with me, Luke, and Haley.
Chapter Forty-One
Luke
“Are you doing okay?” Brook asked from my side.
“I’m good,” I assured her with a nod. Naturally, Brook didn’t believe me, but she also didn’t push. This was going to be a stressful day, and I knew it was killing both of us not to have Chelsea and Ty with us. Brook’s attorney had advised against having Ty with her since she thought it would make my dad even less rational.
I hadn’t heard from Chelsea since Saturday. While it was making me crazy because I wanted to ask how her decision making process was going, I was giving her the space she’d asked for. I wasn’t holding out much hope she’d come to a decision I wanted, but she’d been right about needing to do this sooner rather than later. My focus could not be on dealing with the breakup when Haley arrived. Sadly, that was where I saw things going between us.
“Have you talked to Chelsea today?” Brook asked.
I shook my head. “I’m giving her space.”
“Why?” Brook asked.
I shrugged. “She asked me to give her space, so I am.”
Brook looked like she wanted to push for more details, but after studying me for a moment, she simply nodded. I knew she’d text me later. Brook wouldn’t let this simply drop, but she also respected how much I hated having these talks in person. Besides, for the next couple of hours, we needed to focus on getting what we wanted from my asshole dad.
Misty was not in the room yet because we’d all agreed my dad might take off if she was there. Dealing with him was a lot like dealing with an overindulged toddler. We were intentionally trying to catch my dad off-guard in the hopes we could get him to listen to reason. As it stood, he was over an hour late. Even his attorney was losing patience with him.
At five after ten, my dad finally strolled in for our nine o’clock meeting. He was dressed in an expensive black suit that probably cost more than my rent. His cocky grin slipped for a moment when his eyes landed on me and my attorney, likely because he hated being surprised.
“What are you doing here?” he demanded, but he didn’t give me a chance to answer before turning to his attorney and gesturing to me with his shoulder. “That’s my son—the one my wife is fucking.”
“Don’t insult Brook,” I warned quietly. “You know damn well that’s a lie.”
His attorney didn’t look amused or interested. “Can we get on with this meeting instead of playing games? Ms. Loring’s relationships are not relevant to this meeting.”
My dad shrugged, trying for casual, but he was definitely pouting after being scolded by his attorney. “I don’t know what you’re complaining about,” he grumbled. “You’re getting paid by the hour.”
“I have other clients to meet today,” his attorney replied.
“Before we move forward with any discussions about the divorce, we’d like to talk about the child Mr. Robinson is expecting with Misty Whitener,” my attorney began.
“That kid is not mine, and I’m not paying that whore a dime,” my dad snapped.
My fists clenched, and I wanted desperately to punch the asshole in the face—again.
“Why don’t we bring Miss Whitener in here for this discussion,” Brook’s attorney suggested.
“Don’t even think about leaving,” I warned my dad quietly when he began to stand. His eyes blazed with anger when he glared at me, but he clearly decided it would be a bad idea to push me because he cleared his throat and settled back into his seat, averting his gaze.
Misty walked into the room and took a seat by my side, between me and my attorney.
“Miss Whitener has agreed to sign papers allowing Lucas Robinson to adopt her unborn child,” my attorney began. “We’ve already started the paperwork, and she will sign the final papers after the birth. We would like you to agree to sign them, as well.”
Looking across at my dad, I expected to see relief. Instead, his eyes took on a calculating gleam as they moved between the three of us.
“I see,” my dad said with a smug grin. “You want me to sign these papers to make things easier for you, but I gotta ask what’s in it for me?”
“Are you kidding me?” Brook muttered.
“Oh, come on, baby girl,” my dad crooned at her. “You want Luke to get this kid, so why don’t we come to some sort of agreement?”
My dad’s attorney sighed in frustration, ready to respond, but Brook’s attorney spoke up first. “These cases are not related,” her attorney stated. “We allowed Mr. Robinson to come in here with his attorney because Ms. Loring wanted him to have this chance to reason with you. She also wanted the chance to give you her revised terms for the divorce.”
Brook’s attorney slid a stack of papers across the table, and my dad’s attorney studied them before nodding and turning toward my dad. “Ms. Loring is asking for half your assets and properties. She is also asking for alimony in the amount of four thousand dollars a month.”
My dad let of a bark of laughter, shaking his head as if it were all some big joke. “She has no right to any of that,” he argued.
“Actually,” his attorney began with a pleasant smile, “her request is reasonable, and if we go before a judge, she will likely get what she’s asking for.”
“Then I’ll demand part of her business,” he snapped.
Brook shrugged. “I can always start a new business after the divorce is final. I’ll certainly have enough money with this big settlement.”
“What do you want to stop these games?” my dad demanded, sounding like he was the victim and hadn’t been playing games himself.
“I want you to stop trying to delay this divorce,” Brook told him. “I want my divorce under the original terms, and I want you to pay for the attorney’s fees since I’ve had to pay much more than I should because of your stalling tactics.”
Jaw clenched, my dad glared at her. He hated losing, and he was probably trying to find a way to turn this to his advantage. “I suppose you want me to sign those adoption
papers, too,” he snapped.
I shook my head. “That’s a separate issue. You don’t want this baby, and I do. So, just sign the papers, and you won’t have to pretend to be a father again.”
“You can even pretend it isn’t your baby, if that makes you feel better,” Misty added. “Luke actually wants her, so let him give her a home. She deserves that.”
For just a moment, my dad didn’t look like a selfish prick. His eyes landed on me, and he said something I’d never expected to hear from him. “I’ll sign the adoption papers. At least, I did one thing right by letting Brook take over raising you. She did a good job.” Apparently, it was too hard to be nice for very long because my dad quickly ruined the moment. “She’s a pretty good lay, too, isn’t she?”
I was halfway across the table when Brook and my attorney both caught me.
“Don’t hit him!” Brook ordered.
“Fine,” I ground out.
“We’ll head out and let you finish the details of the divorce,” my attorney offered, probably figuring it was best to get me out of the building so I didn’t react to my dad’s stupidity again.
I hugged Misty once we walked out of the offices. “Are you doing okay?”
She shrugged. “I can’t believe I wanted to raise a kid with that guy. This may sound crazy, but part of me still loves him.”
I shrugged. “Love doesn’t always make sense.”
“Where’s Chelsea?” she asked.
“She’s working,” I replied. While I knew Misty better than when she’d shown up at my apartment, we still didn’t know each other very well. I was okay with that since I doubted we’d see each other much after she had Haley.
“Tell her I said, hi,” Misty replied.
“Don’t forget to call me after your doctor’s appointment tomorrow,” I reminded her.
“I won’t,” she promised before walking away and leaving me standing there alone, and boy did I feel alone at that moment.
What I wanted to do was call Chelsea and tell her what had happened. I wanted to share my joy in getting my father to agree to sign the adoption papers. While I knew he could still be a problem, this was a step in the right direction.
Naughty at 30 (Love Without Batteries #2) Page 17