by Ambria Davis
I swerved through traffic, breaking all kinds of traffic laws, trying to make it home. I was anxious, yet nervous. Here I was, finally about to get close to the people who had wronged me and I wanted so badly to get on with my life. As I sped through traffic, I thought of the many things that I’d do once I laid hands on them. I wanted to cause them the same amount of pain that they’d caused me. I wanted to make it quick and get the shit over with so that I could get my life back together.
I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn’t even notice I’d made it to my home. Pulling up to the house, I noticed that dude hadn’t arrived yet, so I killed the engine and sat there waiting. Lord knows I hated to wait, especially about something like this. Knowing that I’d soon be reunited with my boys had me on edge.
I sat there thinking about my babies. What did they look like? Would they remember me? Would they even want to be bothered with me? How were they? Did Stacy, Kaylin, and Julius hurt them? Where were they living? Were they living right? Those questions were rolling through my mind. Questions that I didn’t have the answers to, but I soon would. As I sat there going back and forth, I hadn’t noticed when David pulled up until he knocked on the window. I looked at him, grabbed my keys and purse, and got out.
“Hey, David,” I said, greeting him.
“What’s up, Amina?” he asked, giving me a hug.
“Ain’t nothing,” I replied. “What you got for me?”
“Yes, I have it right here,” he said, pulling a yellow envelope from the inside of his jacket and handing to me. I reached inside my purse, pulled out the white envelope that contained the money, and tried passing it to him, but he stopped me.
“No, don’t worry about it. You good. Weedy already took care of it,” he said, shocking me.
“Um, okay,” I replied, “and thank you, David. I’m sure that this wasn’t easy to come by.”
“Oh, but it was, and you’re welcome.” With that said, he walked back to his car, got in and left. A few minutes later, I made my way inside.
I placed my keys and purse on the coffee table and made my way into the dining room. Once I got in there, I threw the envelope on the table and went straight to the bar for a drink. I immediately took the drink to the head, poured another one, and did the same thing. Once I had calmed my nerves down a bit, I walked over to the table and sat down. Pulling the envelope in front of me, I sat there, just staring at it as if it were some type of disease or something. I treated it like something was going to jump out of it and bite me in the face.
After a few moments of just staring at it, I picked it up and opened it. There were a bunch of things in there, so I pulled everything out and placed it all onto the table. Before I started going through it, I said a silent prayer, asking God for strength. Once I felt that I was able to, I started going through everything. The more I looked at it, the madder I became. I couldn’t believe they could ruin someone’s life, kidnap their kids, and pretend as if everything was all right. When I got to a picture of Stacy, Kaylin, and the kids, I completely lost it.
“All this time. All this fucking time and these bitches have been right under my nose!” I yelled, throwing the drink that I had been nursing at the wall. “You’d think the police would be doing their jobs and handling the shit right now, but they ain’t doing a damn thing. They have both the Atlanta and New Orleans police departments so-called after their asses, and yet they’re still on the run. I don’t know why I even tried to count on the police to find my kids anyway. All they want to do is sit on their asses and eat fucking donuts!”
I sat there talking to myself, trying to stop myself from going crazy. I was completely out of it. I knocked over any- and everything that was in my way. I didn’t even know that I had that type of strength until I turned over the whole damn table. That’s how mad and fucked up I was. I walked to the corner, fell to the floor, and cried. I was an emotional wreck right now. I was so mad, but I was also hurt. I couldn’t believe that Kaylin and I, and the family we had built, had come to this. We were supposed to be that couple who withstood it all: that homie, lover, friend thing. I had once planned to marry this man. He was the father of my kids, and now he was nothing to me. I had nothing now but hate toward him, and it was his fault.
I found myself thinking about the very first time that Kaylin and I first met. We were madly in love with each other. There’d been a time when we would’ve killed for each other, but not anymore and Stacy was the cause for all of that. Had I known about Stacy from the beginning, things would’ve probably gone much differently. I should’ve listened to Troy when she first said that Stacy was a hater, but no, I was always the bitch to try to give people the benefit of the doubt. Hell, I stayed doing it with Kaylin, but not anymore. Now I was wiser, and my heart was much colder.
“Ma, what’s wrong?” Jayden asked, walking into the room. I’d forgotten anyone else was there. He looked around the room at the mess that I’d made, then at me slumped in the corner and he knew something was wrong. I silently sat in the corner, wishing that I could just snap my fingers and everything would go back to the way it was, with the only thing different being Jayden instead of Kaylin. I looked up into his eyes, just as the floodgates opened. Jayden walked over, sat down beside me, and took me into his arms. “It’s going to be all right. Whatever it is, it will be okay,” he said, rubbing my back.
I sat in his lap, crying my eyes out. I felt so hopeless, like a little girl who’d gotten her heart broken for the first time and was in desperate need of her father. Like that little girl, I needed to be loved.
“Oh, my God. Jayden, what’s going on?” Troy was the next one to ask.
“Mommy!” Kailay and Kayla yelled, running toward me.
“What’s wrong with my Mommy, Uncle Jay?” Kayla asked. I could tell by the sound of her voice that she was probably mugging him.
“Yeah, why is she crying, dude?” Kailay asked.
“I don’t know, li’l bits. Mommy hasn’t told me yet,” he replied, looking up at them. I absolutely loved the relationship that Jayden and the girls had. He wasn’t their father, but he treated them no differently than he would his own child.
“Troy, take the girls upstairs to their rooms,” I said, finally speaking up.
“No, Mommy, we want to stay here with you,” Kailay said, hugging me tight.
“Yeah, Mommy. We don’t want to leave you again,” Kayla replied, hugging me extra tight. Hearing them say those words had hurt me to my soul. The girls were still taking it hard. Kayla still had nightmares, and Kailay barely wanted to leave my side. They were both shocked when they found out that I was still alive, but even that didn’t take away the fear of being separated from me again. It was so bad that I’ve been having to take baths with them, and in order for them to fall asleep, I had to be in the room. That shit really scared my girls, but by the grace of God and a whole lot of therapy and reassurance, they’d get over it.
“It’s okay, girls. Mommy will be fine. I promise. Go to y’all rooms while Mommy has a talk with Auntie Troy and Uncle Jay. I’ll be up to check on y’all in a minute,” I said, reassuring them. They hesitated a bit but went anyway.
I wanted to wait until Troy got back before I decided to say anything. Knowing Jayden, I knew his mind was probably full of questions. I’d answer them, but for now, I just chose to lay my head on his chest. I wanted to address everyone at the same time. I knew what I was about to say was going to make them flip a little, but oh well. It was what it was.
“What’s up? What’s going on with y’all?” she asked when she walked back into the room.
“When’s Mark coming back in town?” I asked them.
“In a couple of days. Why?” Jayden answered.
“I need you to call him and tell him to get here like yesterday.”
“What you mean? What’s going on, Amina?” he asked from behind me.
Getting up from where I was, I walked over to the table that I had turned over earlier. I picked it up, began to collec
t all of the information David had given me, walked back over to them, and handed Jayden the papers. I didn’t say anything. I just walked over to the bar and poured myself yet another drink, because I knew I was going to need it.
“Hold up! Am I seeing this shit correctly? When did you have the time to do all of this?” he asked, heated. Jayden had gotten very protective over the last couple months, and I knew he was going to be mad, which was why I poured that drink.
“Yes, you are. I hired a private investigator a while back. I got tired of waiting.”
“Ma, what were you thinking? I told you to fall back. I was going to handle the shit,” he said, a little too loudly for my nerves.
“When, huh? When were you going to handle it? When these bitches take my kids and get ghost? When I’d never be able to see them again? Or when I die? Tell me, Jayden, when were you going to handle it?” I asked, mad as fuck. His ass was really starting to piss me off. “The longer I continue to wait, the longer my boys are away from me. I can’t continue to live with two kids, knowing that I have two more out there looking for and asking about me. I can’t do this, baby. I’ve tried, but I can’t. I won’t go another day, week, month, or year without my kids. It’s time to do something about it.”
By that time, I was in full-blown tears. He out of all people should have understood where I was coming from. Over these past couple months, I’d had nightmares, and in every one of them, my kids were being taken away from me. He was there for each of them, comforting me, holding cold towels against my forehead when I’d wake up in cold sweats.
“Ma, I understand all of that, and I feel where you’re coming from. I know what you’ve been through, which is why I said that I was going to handle it. I know you, and I’ve seen you break down many times. You’re constantly doing things without thinking it through,” he replied. “When I told you to chill and fall back, it was for a reason, but you never seem to listen to what anyone says. Not everyone is out to hurt you or do you wrong, Mimi, and I hope you learn that shit before it’s too late,” he remarked, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He then punched in a few numbers and placed the phone to his ear.
“What’s up, man? What you got for me?” he asked whoever it was on the other end of the phone. “Hold up, man, I’m about to put you on speakerphone. Go ’head,” he then said.
“Wait, are you alone?” Mark asked.
“Nah, I’m here with Amina and Troy.”
“Hello, Mimi, Troy,” Mark said to us.
“Hey, Mark,” Troy and I said together.
“So you want me to say this in front of them?” he addressed Jayden.
“Well, we kind of have no choice. Amina hired a PI, and he gave her some information already,” Jayden said, looking up at me. “Oh, and start from the beginning. I don’t want to leave anything out.”
“Okay,” he replied. “Well, about three weeks ago, we got word about where Stacy and Kaylin were. At first, we thought it was a joke, because when the chick called us, she gave us the info, then hung up. Not knowing if it was true and knowing how bad you wanted your kids back, we sent a few pictures of the kids and them, along with the address and had one of my workers check it out. A week later, we got word back that it was them. So I went to check it out.”
“Well okay. So what’s new?” I asked, speaking up before Jayden could say anything.
“Um, well, I’ve been following them for a bit and I have yet to see Kaylin. I mean I see Stacy, her father, the kids, and some other woman, but I have yet to spot him.”
“What about my kids? Are you able to get them?” I asked. “I’ll worry about Kaylin later.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. My number one priority is my kids,” I told him.
“Okay. Well, how are we going to do this, Jayden?” he asked Jayden, who was just sitting there looking at me.
“I don’t know. Maybe you should ask Mimi since she seems to be running the show,” he said, giving me an evil stare.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I asked, snapping at his ass.
“Just what I said,” he replied. “You always want to act like you’re the one in charge. So why don’t you tell him what we’re going to do?”
“Jayden, I’m about to go there with you right now,” I said, pointing my finger at him.
“Yeah, whatever,” he said with a wave of his hand. Honestly, our relationship had been on the edge lately, and I knew it was because of me, but right now we couldn’t do this. We were going to have to get into that at another time.
“Not right now, Jay, please,” I said, begging him with pleading eyes. He looked at me, grabbed the phone off the table, and left the room.
“What was that?” Troy asked, walking over to me.
“It’s nothing.” I shrugged.
“Well what do you think he’s going to do?” she asked me.
“Honestly I don’t know, but I already have the information that I needed, and with or without his help I’m going to get my children, and that’s that. There’s nothing he can do to change my mind,” I replied, just as he walked back into the room. He didn’t say anything. He just stood there staring at me intently. The way that he was looking at me was making me feel very uncomfortable.
“Okay, we’re going to head to West Virginia in a few days,” he finally said. He then turned and said to me, “During that time, you need to find a spot that’s safe for the girls to go to.”
“Okay,” I replied.
“Can you give us a minute please?” he asked, looking at Troy. She nodded her head and then left the room. Once she was gone, he turned back to me.
“Ma, I’m going to be honest with you. Shit like this ain’t easy. You can’t just go down there and think you can just up and get your kids back without a plan. That shit won’t work. You have to listen and not let your emotions get the best of you. This time you’re going to have to listen to what I say or else it’s a done deal,” he said.
He looked at me once and then left the room. I knew he was mad, because his face told me so. I wanted to run after him, but I knew he probably needed the space and time to think. I didn’t. Instead, I just stayed there and thought about what he had said. I already knew the shit wasn’t easy. It took us so long to find them, so I knew getting to them wouldn’t be easy either. I just hoped and prayed that when the shit went down my kids wouldn’t get caught up in this bullshit.
Chapter 22
Shelly
I’d been here for about three weeks, looking and searching for Jayden and still I came up with nothing. I couldn’t believe that I traveled all the way down to Atlanta, only for Jayden’s ass not to be here. It would be just like him to pull some shit like that. He really must have wanted me to go crazy on his ass or something.
I sat in the hotel room, pondering my next move. I couldn’t stay here much longer. I was tired, and I was running out of money. Besides Jade, I didn’t know anyone, and she wasn’t answering the phone, which was beginning to aggravate the hell out of me. Any other time, I’d be able to get a hold of her, but not this time. I’d called her ass about a thousand times and still got no answer.
Fuck this shit, I thought as I grabbed my keys and my purse and headed out of the room. I didn’t know where I was actually going, but I knew I couldn’t stay in this hotel room one more night. Just looking at these walls had me about to go crazy.
I opened the door and headed straight for the elevator. After pushing the down button, I stood there and waited for a minute or two. Once I was in the elevator, I pushed the button for the first floor as the doors began to close, but someone’s hand stopped them from closing completely.
“Sorry ’bout that,” I heard a male voice say. I looked up from the floor, only for my eyes to be blessed by the most handsome man I’d ever seen. I mean dude was fine as fuck. Standing at about six foot two, with a light complexion and a tight-ass body, dude looked like he belonged on a cover of GQ and shit.
“That’s okay,” I said, f
lashing him a smile. I moved over to the corner, a few feet away from him, because I didn’t trust myself. As fine as this dude was, I was liable to jump his bones and fuck the shit out of his ass right in this elevator.
I was very glad when the elevator had finally come to a stop on the first floor, because I honestly didn’t believe that I would’ve been able to contain myself any longer. I almost busted my ass trying to get up out of there. That’s how fast I was walking.
“Um, excuse me,” the baritone voice said from behind me. When I turned around, I damn near went into shock. He was standing right there.
“Y . . . yes?” I stuttered. This dude had completely taken my breath away.
“I didn’t get your name, beautiful,” he said, staring at me with a pair of eyes that looked so dreamy, I thought I was going to drop my panties right then and there.
“My name is Lashell, but everyone calls me Shell or Shelly,” I replied, reaching my hand out for him to shake.
“Kaylin, but everyone calls me Kay,” he said, pulling me in for a hug. He shocked the hell out of me at first, but after a minute, I hugged him back.
“Um, okay,” I replied. For a moment, we just stood there staring at one another. “Well, um, I should be going now. It was nice meeting you.”
“Likewise,” he said, and I walked off. “Wait, do you have a man?” he asked. My mind quickly went to Jayden, but then I remembered that he was fucking around with some bitch, so technically, I was indeed single.
“Um, no. Do you have a woman?” I asked.
He smiled, and that’s when I noticed that he had two dimples. “Nah, I’m single right now.”