by Ambria Davis
“What’s wrong? Why are you yelling?’ Mark asked as he and Jayden entered the room.
“We have to call an ambulance, now!” I heard her yell.
“Why? What’s wrong?” Jayden asked.
“Mimi’s mother not moving. She won’t wake up,” she said to him. She then walked over to where I was and began to shake me. “Mimi, you have to pull it together, mami.”
I blinked a few times before I looked her way, remembered where I was, and ran to my mother’s side. “Did anyone call an ambulance yet?” I asked them. They looked at each other, and then shook their heads, saying no. “Well, could y’all please do so?”
I watched as Troy pulled out her phone and walked out of the room. I then turned back to where my mother lay, and I tried to cover her up. “Can one of you guys please help me put a shirt on her before the ambulance gets here?” I asked, looking at them.
Jayden came over to where I was, picked up the T-shirt that Troy had gotten and helped me slip it over her head. “Thank you,” I said to him, just as Troy walked back into the room.
“What happened?” I asked her.
“I called. They said they’ll be here in about three minutes,” she replied.
“Okay, thanks,” I said to her. I sat there in a funk. I couldn’t believe I was placed on this earth just to go through all of this. I hadn’t been in this state for a full twenty-four hours, and here I was, into some shit again. I sat there trying to go over every inch of my life that I could possibly remember, trying to figure out what I did wrong, but I came up with nothing. I didn’t know why it was happening, but I couldn’t keep going through all of this. I knew there was a God up there somewhere and I wished He would help me before I went insane.
I was so into my thoughts that I didn’t see when Troy had left the room. She came back a minute later with two paramedics following her.
“Excuse me, ma’am,” the female said. I got up and stepped on the side so that they would be able to work.
“It looks like a drug overdose. We’re going to have to transfer her before it’s too late,” the female said as the male left the room to get the stretcher.
“What’s her name?” she asked, looking at me.
“Um, her name is Marie Washington,” I replied, stuttering.
A few seconds later, the male paramedic returned to the room with the stretcher. I silently prayed as they placed her on the gurney and prepared to leave. Once we made it outside, I spotted a gang of people surrounding the building. I figured as much, because around here people never minded their business.
“Is everything all right with Marie?” some old lady asked me.
“Yes, everything is fine,” I replied, never slowing my stride.
“Well, what’s wrong with her?’ she asked as she struggled to keep up with me.
I gave her a look that said, “Bitch, mind your own business,” but it was a few seconds before she got the hint.
“Is anyone going to ride in the ambulance with her?” they asked once they had loaded her into the ambulance. I stood there looking at Troy, who was looking at me.
“I’ll go,” she replied.
“No, it’s okay. I’ll go,” I told her. She had done more than enough for me with Kailay. I couldn’t let her keep on doing this. It was time that I faced my own problems. I needed to handle them myself.
“And you are?” she asked me.
“Um, I’m her daughter, Amina Washington,” I replied.
“Well, okay, come on. We have to go now,” she said, walking off.
“I’ll meet you guys at the hospital,” I said, turning to Troy. I then followed the EMT to the front of the ambulance and got in. It was in that moment I made a promise to myself that I was going to get my life back in order. I was determined not to let any of this break me. I was going through all of this as tests. If these were tests from God, I was not going to fail. I was going to pass every one of them with flying colors.
* * *
Three Weeks Later
I was getting ready to have a mental meltdown. I hadn’t had a full night of rest in three weeks. Hell, actually, you could say that I hadn’t had a full night of rest since I got shot, and I was feeling it. I was so tired and burnt out that I really didn’t have any energy left in me. I’d been running back and forth between Kailay’s and my mother’s hospital rooms. To be honest, I was beat. All I wanted to do was take a hot bath and sleep for a couple of days. That’s how tired I was. Besides sleeping, I really needed a strong drink or two, because my head was all over the place.
When we made it to the hospital that night with my mother, my nerves were on edge and my heart was in my ass. I really thought she was getting ready to check out of this world. Like before, I spent hours waiting for the doctor to update me on her condition. It wasn’t until the morning that I was informed that she had a dangerous amount of heroin in her system and they weren’t sure if she was going to pull out of it. I spent hours by her bedside, praying that she was going to make it. By the grace of God, she pulled through, and I was actually happy about it.
All in all, today was going to be a good day. Today was Kailay’s release day from the hospital, and I was ecstatic. At first, I wasn’t so sure, but the doctor said that she healed faster than he thought she would. She still wouldn’t be able to do all of the things that normal little kids her age did for a while, but I was still grateful that my baby was alive and getting out of the hospital.
“Mommy, can I have some ice cream?” she asked as I helped her put on the clothes that Troy had brought for her. I turned and looked at the scar that was left on her head from where she was cut, and I almost cried, but that look in her bright eyes made me smile.
“Yes, baby. We’ll get you some as soon as the nurse comes with your discharge papers,” I said, helping her into her jacket.
“Okay,” she replied as her little eyes lit up with joy.
“Okay. Now, why don’t you lie down and watch cartoons until the nurse comes? I have to go check on someone,” I told her.
“Can you put it on Doc McStuffins?” she asked.
“Yes, baby,” I replied.
I got up from the chair, grabbed the remote, and searched the channels for Disney Junior. There were over a hundred channels on TV. I finally found it after searching a minute to find it.
“There you go, baby. I’ll be right back,” I said, placing the remote back on the bed.
“Thank you, Mommy,” she replied before the TV had her full attention.
As I was about to leave the room, Troy came walking in. “What’s up?”
“Nothing. I’m ’bout to go check on my mama. What’s up with you?” I asked her.
“Nothing. I’m just ready to blow this joint. Hospitals are so damn depressing to me,” she said, taking a seat on the bed next to Kailay.
“Who you telling?” I replied. “I’ll be right back.”
I didn’t wait for a reply. I grabbed my purse and left the room. On my way out of the room, I bumped into the nurse.
“I’ll be right back. I’m going to check on someone who’s on another floor,” I said to her.
“Oh, well, I have these papers here for you to sign,” she said, referring to the papers in her hands.
“Okay, well, my sister is in there with her right now. You can just let her sign them.”
“Um, okay,” she said, then headed into the room.
As I started walking toward the elevator, my phone began to ring. I looked at the caller ID and noticed that it was Weedy calling. Since I already knew what he wanted, I answered.
“What you got for me?” I answered the phone, just as I was getting onto the elevator. I pressed the button for the third floor and waited for him to answer.
After a pregnant pause, he finally answered. “Ma, there’s absolutely nothing in the street right now. We’ve searched high and low in and around New Orleans, and we still didn’t find them.”
“What about the house in Edgard?” I asked.
“We searched that one too and, just like the others, they haven’t been there,” he said, making my heart drop. Then everything fell silent. I sat there playing in my thoughts, wondering what I was going to do next. Then he said something that had me interested.
“Ma, I know you want to find your kids and get your revenge, which is why I’m willing to help you. I have this friend who knows some dude who’s a private investigator, but the only thing about it is that he lives in West Virginia.”
“Can you get his information for me?” I asked him. “Right now, I’m willing to do anything.”
“Let me holla at my boy first and see. I’ll holla back at you in a minute,” he said, just as the elevator stopped on the floor that I was going to.
“Okay, and thanks for everything, Weedy,” I said, stepping off the elevator.
“No problem,” he replied. “I’ll call you the minute I get that info for you.”
“Okay,” I said and hung up the phone. I had to stop to take a minute to gather my thoughts. Here I was yet again. No one could find Stacy and Kaylin. I could feel my anger getting the best of me, so I decided to put that to the back of my mind for now.
I was still standing by the elevator when I noticed the nurse and doctor walk into the room that my mother was in. I quickly got myself together and made my way there. When I walked into the room, she was sitting up as they were reading a few things from a clipboard.
“Um, what’s going on, Doctor? Is something wrong?” I asked, getting their attention.
“Oh, no, ma’am. Nothing is wrong. Your mother is going to be released today. We were in here suggesting a few rehab facilities that she can enroll in,” he said, turning his attention to me.
“Well, I wasn’t aware that she’s going home today. Are you sure that’s right?” I asked, walking over to where they were.
He looked at his clipboard before he flipped a few pages and brought his attention back to me. “Well, yes. Your mother no longer has any signs of drugs in her system, and all of her vitals are strong, which is why we’re releasing her.”
“Okay, you said something about a rehab facility?” I asked.
“Um, yes. Although your mother’s been clean a couple of weeks, the fact of the matter is that she has a drug problem. Without rehab, there’s an excellent chance that she will relapse into using, which is why I suggest that she checks into a drug rehabilitation facility,” he said, handing me a few pamphlets. I took one look at the info and decided that I was going to get my mother some good help, but I didn’t think a facility in New Orleans would do that. I needed to get her out of this state and into a place that she knew nothing about, which was just how I was going to get to West Virginia without Jayden becoming suspicious. “Okay, thank you. When will she be discharged?”
“Um, actually we have the papers right here. We were just waiting for someone to come and sign them so that she could be released.”
“Okay, well, I’m here. I’ll sign them,” I told him.
“Okay,” he said and handed me the clipboard so I could sign the papers. Once I was done signing everything, he handed me a copy and said that a nurse would be right here to roll her out. They made sure that we had everything, they said good-bye, and left, leaving my mother and me there alone.
The room was so quiet that if you dropped a needle on the floor, we were going to hear it. I stood there in the same place that I was when the doctor left. She just sat there staring at me as if something was wrong with her. I wasn’t scared or anything. I was more nervous. Here I was in a room with my mother, the same woman who managed to make my life a living hell, and I didn’t know what to say. This was actually the first time we’d been alone in years, and it was awkward as fuck.
“Why are you helping me, Amina?” she asked, just above a whisper.
“What did you say?” I asked her. I was so nervous that I had to tap my hand against my leg to try to calm my nerves.
“I asked, why are you helping me? I mean after all of the things that I did to you in life, I figured you would be the last person to help me. So why are you doing it?” she asked again.
“To be honest with you, I don’t know why. I mean, in my mind I keep hearing myself say that I want to put the past behind us and help you, but as I stand here right now, I don’t know if I’m able to,” I responded. She didn’t say anything. She just sat there. I guessed she was trying to find the right words to say.
“Amina, I’m not looking for self-pity, nor am I looking for you to do anything for me. When I said that I was sorry a few weeks ago, I meant that. I know I wasn’t a great mother to you at all and I wouldn’t or couldn’t be mad if you hated me, because I deserve it. You can leave right now if that’s what your heart is telling you, and I wouldn’t feel no type of way, but I want to thank you for being there for me when I didn’t deserve it. Like always, you never cease to amaze me.”
“Marie, if I wanted to leave, I would have. I told you what I came here to do. Yes, I know I just said that I wasn’t sure if I wanted to, but I’m all you got. I wouldn’t feel right if I left you hanging like this in your condition. If you let me, I want to help you, and after that, you can go back to your life, and if you choose to, whether we both like it or not, we’re going to be in each other’s lives. Point. Blank. Period,” I said to her. She didn’t say anything. She couldn’t even look at me. She just sat there with her fingers entwined.
“Amina, I already told you that I don’t need no pity party. I’m not looking for you to do anything for me out of guilt.”
Here she goes again with this shit, making me start to rethink my decision. Fuck it. I walked over to the bed and took a seat by her foot. “I told you why I want to help you. I’m not worrying about the shit that you’ve done to me before. I just want to put the shit in the past and leave it there,” I said, reaching for her hand. Her breath quickened as I slowly rubbed my thumb over the back of it. I couldn’t believe that this moment was happening either. “In order for us to move forward, you have to let all of this go.”
“Darling, I want you to know that I love you, and I know I haven’t shown you that, but I do. Again, I want to say that I’m sorry for all of the things that I’ve put you through and there’s no way that I could let all of that go. I’ve really done some things that I’m not proud of, and I can’t believe that you are willing to forgive me for it, but I’m willing to try,” she replied. I raised my head up and noticed that she was now crying.
“Aw, Ma, you don’t have to cry,” I said, hugging her. I used my thumb to wipe the tears that had rolled down her face, just as the nurse walked in with a wheelchair to take her out. “Now come and let’s get up out of here before I go crazy.”
“Okay,” she said, with a light chuckle. She then reached up to my face, giving me a kiss on my cheek. I was confused at first, but it made my heart warm up. I didn’t know what this feeling was, but I was happy to be feeling it. A few years ago, if someone had told me that my mother and I would be in this position today, trying to repair our broken relationship, I would’ve probably spit in their faces and cursed their asses out after all the shit she had put me through. But today was different. I was different. I was more forgiving, and I was happy about that.
I got up from the bed and waited to the side as the nurse helped her get dressed and then placed her in the wheelchair. Once everything was straight, and she was ready, the nurse handed the chair over to me, and then we left. Hopping onto the elevator, I hit the button for the fourth floor and waited for the doors to close.
“Where are we going?” my mother asked once she noticed that the elevator was going up instead of down.
“I have to pick someone up from here,” I replied as the bell rang. Getting off the elevator, I bumped into the last person I’d expected to see.
“Amina, is that you?” she asked, looking confused as fuck.
“Yes, Darlene, it’s me,” I answered. I could believe that this bitch had the nerve to show up here, after all of the thin
gs that Kaylin had put me through.
“But how? I thought you was dead!”
“Nah, as you can see. I’m alive and fine now, no thanks to your son,” I said, rolling my eyes at her.
“Well, does Kaylin know about this?” she had the nerve to ask.
“No, actually, no one knows that I’m still alive and I’d love for you to keep this to yourself.”
“But you have to tell him. The last time I spoke to him, he sounded as if he was going to go crazy, thinking that you were dead.”
“Darlene, what did Kaylin actually tell you?” I asked, because from the way she was talking, I knew damn well he didn’t tell her what went down that day.
“He didn’t say much. When he called me, all he said was that you was dead,” she replied. “He’s going to be so happy to know that you are alive.”
“I wouldn’t be too sure about that.”
“Why? What are y’all not telling me?” she asked.
“Ms. Darlene, Kaylin was the one shot me and left me for dead. All because of Stacy,” I said, bursting her bubble.
“No, that can’t be true. My son would never do something like that to you. He loved you,” she replied, shaking her head as if the shit weren’t true.
“Loved me? Yeah, he loved me enough to fuck my friend—no, my sister—and get that ho pregnant. Then he let her come back years later and destroy our family. Now I don’t know what Kaylin has told you, but whether you want to believe it or not, Kaylin was the one who did this to me, and I hope he rots in hell,” I said, and then walked off, leaving her standing there with her mouth open. I didn’t have time for this shit. I’d think about Kaylin’s ass a little later. Right now, the only thing on my agenda was to get my mother and daughter up out of here, so that they could go home.
Chapter 21
Mimi
I’d been back home for only a few days, trying to keep myself busy. I was on my way to meet with my mother when the private investigator I hired phoned me. He told me that he had some information on Stacy and Julius I may be interested in. I immediately told him yes, and he agreed to meet me back at my house. As soon as I got off the phone with him, I phoned my mother and told her that I had to cancel our plans for today. Luckily, she hadn’t yet left her apartment that I had just gotten for her. I expressed how sorry I was, and she said that it was okay. I then told her that I was going to call her later to reschedule. I then called the man back and told him where to meet me.