I attended parties, as usual, but couldn’t care less about the hordes of women flocking to me. There was only one woman I wanted and I was sure she was at some other guy’s side. That was the story of my life. At least I had one thing going for me. The field might have been my saving grace, but it was also my battlefield. With each scoring victory, my demons were more determined than ever to get the best of me. The question was: how long could I defeat them?
Σ
Chapter 13
A little more persistence, a little more effort,
And what seemed like hopeless failure may turn to glorious success.
~Elbert Hubbard
On Sunday night, I lay in bed, listening to the rain beat angrily against the window. Unable to sleep, I grabbed my phone and went on Facebook. I told myself not to do it, but I typed in Lexi’s name and landed on her page. She still hadn’t accepted my friend request, so her posts remained hidden. None of my friends knew her and the few people I asked claimed they didn’t know her either. She was like the most beautiful, unknown student on PHU’s campus. It all made sense. Her good girl status explained why no one knew her — including me.
Based on what happened at her dorm, I knew she was dealing with a lot. I just wanted to be there for her, but her reactions made it clear she didn’t want to interact with me. I got it, though. And the last thing I wanted was to come in between a couple engaged to be married. When I finally confessed to Josh and Shawn what was going on, they told me to give her space. What bothered me the most was not knowing. Since she never confirmed being engaged, I honestly had no idea if that was what she was dealing with.
Then, it hit me — the one person who probably knew the answers to all my questions. I typed in Delaney’s name and went to her page. She had some recent posts with her and Luke, but nothing with Lexi. I hesitated for a moment and then hit the message button.
Me: Hey, Delaney. What’s up?
With each passing second, I regretted my decision to contact her. My phone vibrated and I dropped it. I fumbled with the sheets, finally finding it and quickly flipped it over.
Delaney: Hey, what’s going on?
I broke out in a nasty sweat and hopped out of bed, flipping on the ceiling fan, despite it being forty degrees outside. Propping myself against the headboard, I tapped out a message, which I deleted and rewrote three times before finally sending.
Me: I haven’t heard from Lexi in two weeks and wanted to make sure she was okay.
With a death grip on my phone, I waited for a response.
Delaney: Oh yeah, she’s having a tough time right now.
Shit. Maybe this was a bad idea. I didn’t know how to ask about what happened at the dorm, so I acted like I knew what happened instead.
Me: When I last saw her, she was really upset about what happened at the dorm.
Delaney: When was that?
I stared at the message, unsure of how to respond.
Me: 2 weeks ago, on a Thursday.
Delaney: She didn’t tell me anything. What happened?
Crap. How in the hell was I supposed to tell her she was screwing Lexi’s fiancé or supposed brother?
Me: We were working on a paper in a study room and she ran up to the dorm to get something. When she came back, she was all upset - saying that you were with her brother.
Delaney: Oh no! I had no idea she overheard us. How embarrassing.
It was now or never. I typed out another text, determined to find out once and for all. I cringed and hit send, knowing I might piss her off, but I had to know.
Me: Yeah, she was pretty freaked out. For a moment, I thought maybe you were with her guy or something.
Delaney: What? Oh hell no! Not Collin. I can’t believe you thought that!
I pounded the bed with my fist. She did have a fiancé or boyfriend. I knew I should’ve listened to Josh and asked her outright. The question was: who was this Collin dude?
Me: Sorry!
I held my breath, hoping she’d let it go.
Delaney: It’s okay. Her brother didn’t want me to say anything to her, but she knows now.
I breathed a sigh of relief, but I wasn’t done getting to the real reason Lexi was avoiding me.
Me: Okay good. I just didn’t know what to think because she quit tutoring me and I didn’t know if it was something I did or what.
Three dots flashed on the screen for what seemed like forever. Then finally, the message appeared.
Delaney: No. Um…it’s not you she’s struggling with at the moment.
Me: Are you sure? I tried to kiss her at the stadium, but she refused and asked me to take her home. I did, but ever since then she’s been ignoring me. I swear, I had no idea she was in a relationship with someone. I hope I didn’t break them up. If so, I’m the biggest ass ever.
Without thinking twice, I sent the message. I had to get it off my chest.
Delaney: Relax! You didn’t break them up. They started having problems way before you entered the picture. Lexi had to make a tough decision, but I think she made the right one. You should never marry someone you’re not in love with.
Oh, shit! She was engaged.
My heart plummeted to the pit of my stomach. I should have known better and listened to my gut. But why didn’t she tell me? The reason was obvious. She liked me. But what now?
Me: I agree. I just don’t know why she kept it from me.
Delaney: I don’t know, but I’m sure it has something to do with the way she feels about you.
Score!
Me: I really like Lexi. She’s a great girl. I want to be there for her, but don’t want to keep stalking her.
Delaney: Lol! Yeah, you probably need to chill for a while. Give her some time, she’ll come around. I gotta go, but I’ll keep you posted.
Me: Thanks! I owe you.
Delaney: You owe me nothing. She’s my friend and I want her to be happy. Talk to you later.
Me: Later.
I reread the message at least three times. Lexi had been engaged, but wasn’t any longer. She liked me, but needed some time. Could I ask for anything more? If she needed time, that’s what I’d give her.
***
Each passing day seemed like an eternity and even though I wanted to see Lexi so damn bad, I did what Delaney, Josh, and Shawn suggested and gave her some space. I had to keep the faith that she’d call me. That she’d be able to get over Collin and move on without him. That she’d give me a chance to prove I was capable of so much more. The challenging part was staying strong when I had so many temptations to distract me, including females. I redirected all my energy to school and playing football. That kept my mind focused as I waited to hear from Lexi.
“Raven!” An unfamiliar female voice called my name as I shuffled through the commons area by the student union.
I turned around, searching for the girl. Students swarmed the area and it took me a moment to spot a pair of flying hands. “Hey, Delaney.” I made eye contact with her as we made a path toward each other.
“How’s it going?” The cold wind blew hard and she gathered her long hair in her hands, pulling it to the side.
I shrugged. “Alright, I guess.” I looked around at the people congregated, holding each other and sobbing. A PHU alum who had become a local teacher had been killed after some crazy fool opened fired on an elementary campus. Seeing this reminded me I had so much to be thankful for. My problems were nothing compared to the family members and friends who had lost a loved one in the incident. “You?”
Delany wiped a stray tear that escaped from her clear blue eyes. “Okay. Just really sad about what happened at Pine Elementary.”
“Did you know the teacher?”
She shook her head. “Nope.” Placing a hand over her heart, she said, “I just can’t imagine what her family is going through. She had just gotten married this past summer and was pregnant.”
My stomach churned. “I can’t imagine either. Not to mention, the three children who died as well.”
Delaney sniffed and her eyes filled with more tears. “I know. It’s terrible.”
I resituated my backpack and breathed in through my nose as tears threatened to strike. “I gotta go. I have practice in an hour.” I wanted to ask about Lexi, but didn’t. We had our last game of the season and we had to win. Thinking about Lexi wouldn’t do me any good. “See ya later.”
As I turned to walk in the opposite direction, Delaney said, “Hey, I really need to ask a favor.”
I stopped. “Sure. What do you need?”
She rubbed her hands together. “Can we go inside the union or somewhere else? It’s freezing out here.”
“Yeah, sure.” She reminded me of every other girl in Texas complaining about the cold weather.
We made our way through the crowd and entered the student union. It was less crowded, but the somber mood still lingered in the air. “Want something to drink?”
“Yeah, I need something warm.” She breathed into her hands.
“Okay.” I led the way to the café. I ordered coffee and she ordered some type of frou-frou drink with whipped cream and chocolate. We found a spot in a nearby booth and sat.
“So, what do you need, tickets?” I asked, sipping the warm liquid.
“Sort of.” She laughed. “I was thinking maybe you should invite Lexi to the Thanksgiving game.” She scooped a spoonful of whipped cream and shoved it in her mouth.
Over the brim of my cup, I eyed her. “Why? Does she want to go?”
Delaney shrugged. “I don’t know, but she needs to go.”
“So, what are you saying?” I grinned. “You’re going to drag her to the game, despite whether she wants to go or not?”
With indifference, she shrugged. “Basically.”
I winked at her. “You’re my type of friend.”
She waved off my comment. “But seriously, I’m concerned about Lexi.”
Those words caught my attention. “Is she okay?” I leaned against the table, eager to know more. “I haven’t heard from her.”
“That doesn’t surprise me.” Delaney rolled her eyes. “She barely makes it to class and quit her job at the writing center, as you know.”
I nodded.
Delaney used her straw to mix her drink. “As soon as she comes back from class, she gets back in bed and she hardly eats anything.” She shook her head. “I’m starting to get worried about her.”
It sounded like Lexi was really torn up over her breakup. It hurt and although I hoped we had a chance, I wanted the best for her. I rubbed the scruff on my chin. As much as I didn’t want to ask, I knew I had to. “Have you talked to Collin? Does he know how upset she is?”
Delaney sipped her drink. “Collin is aware and he’s heartbroken too, but I think they both realized they were never in love with each other. I’ve told Lexi to go back to him if she’s that upset, but she claims that’s the last thing she wants.”
“Why did she agree to marry him if she didn’t love him?” I asked warily, hoping I wasn’t overstepping my boundaries.
“They’d been together since they were fifteen. She said their parents expected it, so she went along with it.”
“That’s horrible.”
“You’re telling me!” Delaney threw her hands up in the air. “I knew it from the first day I saw them together. Collin’s a very private, non-emotional guy. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s a good guy…he’s practically a saint, but I guess that goes with the territory since he’s a preacher’s son.”
It all made sense. Why her parents wanted her to marry him. They were good for each other. Two saints. As much as I hated to admit it, this reconfirmed I wasn’t good for Lexi. But I wasn’t throwing in the flag yet.
She continued, “Let’s see what else…he studies hard. Um…oh yeah, he’s the pitcher for PHU—”
“Wait a minute.” I coughed, choking on my coffee. “He plays for the school?”
Delaney slurped her drink. “Yeah. You didn’t know that?”
“Shit! I know who he is…” I pointed to her as my mind searched for the answer. “You’re talking about Collin Norris.”
“That’s him.”
My head dropped toward the table. I felt like the biggest idiot. All this time and I never knew she was engaged to the university’s star baseball player. How did I miss that one?
“How did she manage to keep that under the radar?” I was dumbfounded. “I think I read he was engaged to be married, but the article didn’t say to who. The dude doesn’t talk about his private life at all. He works hard to uphold his image and you never see him at parties.”
“That’s Collin,” Delaney sighed. “And to make matters worse, he rooms with her brother.”
“That has to be awkward.”
“You’re telling me.”
I picked at the cardboard sleeve on my coffee cup. Although I hated to hear Lexi was having such a hard time, it told me there was still a chance for us. “I want to be there for her, but I can’t force her to call me.”
“I know.” Delaney nodded. “And you’ve done the right thing by giving her some space. It’s been a month…I just think it’s time for her to move on. I’ve tried to get her to go out, have a good time, but she refuses.”
I leaned against the back cushion of the booth. “You think going to the game would be good for her?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. But I know this…” she stared at me, “I think it’s you she needs.”
A huge lump formed in the back of my throat. I took another sip of my coffee, but it didn’t help it go down. “Really?”
“Yeah. Really.” She smiled and I grinned at her. It was pointless hiding it — I wanted to be with Lexi.
“What did you have in mind?”
Delaney gathered her legs underneath her and straightened. “Okay, here’s what I’m thinking. Get two tickets to the game and I’ll let her know you invited us to go.”
“Okay, that’s easy. I get four tickets to every game and since it’s a home game that makes it easier.” My mom and brothers were going to New Orleans for Thanksgiving, which meant that my tickets were available.
“Perfect!” She clapped. “Let’s see, what else can we do?”
I crossed my arms. Maybe this would work. But I honestly didn’t want to force Lexi to come watch me play. I wanted her to go to the game because she wanted to, not because Delaney told her to. “There’s also a party afterwards.”
“Kappa Sig or Sigma Chi?”
“Kappa Sig, why?” I asked, sensing some resistance.
“No reason.” She acted like it was no big deal, but the tiny beads of sweat collecting around her temples said it all. “I’ll tell her you invited us to the party.”
“That’ll work.”
“Then, it’s settled.” Delaney smiled. “I’m so excited!”
“Okay, then.” I laughed at her. She was so full of life. I was counting on her optimism to get Lexi to the game. If it didn’t work, then I’d have to think of another way to see her.
She grabbed her backpack and slid out of the booth. “Oh, yeah, I’ll be at my parent’s farm for Thanksgiving. I guess I’ll pick up Lexi on the way in…” she paused for a moment, “that should work. I’ll text you when I get back to campus and we can meet up.”
“Sounds good.”
She waved. “See you later.”
“See ya.” I waved back. “And thanks for agreeing to take her. I really appreciate it.”
“Sure.” She smiled and then zipped through the café.
∑
Chapter 14
A kiss that is never tasted, is forever and ever wasted.
~Billie Holiday
It was game day. But not only was it game day — it was the day I had been waiting for all week and I hoped Delaney would come through for me. If Lexi didn’t show up, I promised myself it would not affect my ability to win the game. We needed this win and if I didn’t keep my head straight, I’d be in trouble.
A few hou
rs before the game, Delaney texted me and I told her to come to the stadium to pick up the tickets. Before I left the apartment, I pulled one of my old jerseys from the back of my closet. I had worn it during freshman camp but it still looked new. It was a little big for Lexi, but smaller than any of my current jerseys. I hadn’t realized how much larger and muscular I had gotten over the last three years. Lexi would look hot wearing it.
Delaney met me outside the locker rooms and I gave her the tickets along with the jersey. I told her to tell Lexi to wear it so I could spot her. She promised she would and said Lexi was already at the dorm and she’d get her to the game. Just knowing I was hours from seeing her had my legs weak. How she did that to me was beyond my understanding. But something about her sweetness made my life seem so much better.
She wished me luck and we agreed to meet up at the Kappa Sig tent outside the stadium after the game. Maybe I should’ve wished her luck — we both needed it. I just had to be patient and hope for the best.
We suited up in our black jerseys and grey-reptile pants. The chrome, purple helmets made our uniforms look tight. It was perfect for the last game of the season. I bounced from one end of the locker room to the other, unable to control my excitement. Between the nervous vibes of seeing Lexi and winning the game, I felt like I had taken a hit of something. Shawn and Josh asked if I was okay and I assured them I was clean. I kept the whole Lexi plan under wraps. I didn’t need another lecture or embarrassment.
Coach gave us a hardcore speech and it pumped us up. Not only were we physically ready, we were mentally prepared. I had my game day head on and there was no diverting it. We marched through the tunnel, hollering and chanting our mantra. “We are the Dragons. We play with passion and pride. We fight to the end.”
The air was thick with pride and it energized me. I knew this was going to be my best game ever. “Let’s do this, Dragons!” I yelled.
A Different Side (University Park #4) Page 16