by Yuli Ban
One of the hijacked drivers ran over to me and helped me up. Just from her grip and how the black fishnets hugged her legs, I could tell she was a woman. At that point, I didn’t really care either way. Be a queen. I figured my nuts might actually survive the day if I fell into the embrace of a fellow ball-bearer, but then again that orc. And just thinking about him reminded me about the squeeze, which ignited more pain. ‘You know what? Fuck everyone. I’m going to be a hermit.’
When she pulled off her helmet, her brunette locks flew everywhere. Damn dirty locks, why do humans have hair?
At least she was nice when she said, "Sorry about all that, mate. Sometimes bandits screw with good Samaritans out here to steal high-quality motorcycles."
And I was still moaning and groaning and crying to the heavens for mercy as my penis continued to bleed.
The other girl pulled off her helmet, revealing she was an elf. Already, I didn't like her and wanted to keep her away from me at all costs. Also, she was wearing berry-red latex— not even leather but literal latex that looked like plastic on her skin. That was groovy and could have made me even harder, but those damn elf ears. Didn’t help that the latex was the same color as the nutbuster’s dress. Like, the exact same.
Ana ran back over to me, saying, "Is your dick okay?"
I squeaked, "Yeah, no, don't worry about the rest of me." I beat my forehead into the sand. Was that supposed to be vengeance for sexism and misogyny? Because that sucked. Really, I made up my mind that Ana was never going to live that one down. 'Is my dick okay,' what the fuck. She clearly had become desperate to get it in her, which isn’t how real women act. Call me a virgin all they want, but I at least knew real women.
She helped me up too, though, so I couldn't stay mad at her. But the moment she got me on my own two feet, I stumbled and fell over on myself as the most massive pulse yet of scrote-pain ignited through my entire midsection and left me a quivering jellified mass of broken male. Maria stormed back over to her bike to rage at the situation.
"Bastards took off!"
"Why didn't you get on your bike?" I screamed. "We could've chased them down!"
Maria gasped and turned to the resting hogs as if she seriously hadn't considered it. She looked over to the horizon, fingers on her lips like an idiot, and swallowed. "Cripes, what is wrong with me? I’m usually more attentive than that…"
The thought occurred to me that perhaps the entire incel movement was because of shit like that: gaspingly parched men whose only interaction with females of any species came from video games like this where all the ladies were bimbo tsunamis.
Ana's tail wrapped around her friend's wrist, thrusting her tight, beautiful ass right in my face. "That totally wasn't like you! Usually I'm the one who forgets we have fast bikes."
Bimbo water worlds. And I was Kevin Costner. Seriously, how did that kitten not dislocate her entire pelvis? She pushed herself towards me like she was trying to pop her spine out through the skin. Good god, man. Not that I was complaining about the results— I was just too worried that she could have hurt herself. But then again, she was a video game NPC. Why should I care? What did it matter, really? Or could you make the same argument about real people?
My dick hurt.
Then Maria turned to the two girls and said, "Tatiana, Olga, are you alright?"
Olga tapped her cracked helmet and grinned, wiggling those elf ears. I wanted to burn off the sharp ends so I could be attracted to her like any other horny male. With how much her breasts were trying to break through her catsuit, I should have been staring a foot lower but those goddamn elf ears.
"The visor has a little chip in it," she said. "I'll have to take it down to Coyote Ugly's. But besides that, I'm fine." She turned to Tatiana, whose brown curls and beautiful ROUND ears were much more appealing to me. "You are okay, sister?"
She moaned and rubbed her breasts together. "That bitch kicked me in the tit."
I won't lie, it looked badass, and so did the attack. I'd only ever seen such moves in silly action movies and cartoons, maybe a few video games as well. Actually, when I realized that, I remembered that Violence Online was indeed described as being a lot like Grand Theft Auto, and being able to dropkick people off bikes was one of those things you could do in the old school games. Part of me wished Olga took the feet to the tits, though. Or better yet, to the ears. So they'd come off. And she'd not be an elf anymore.
Why did she have to be an elf, anyway? Grand Theft Auto didn’t have elves. That’s why it was such a great game before the Hurricanes banned it from being sold in the USA. Who actually wants to play as an elf? Orcs and dwarves, I could understand, but those goddamn knife-eared sons and daughters of bitches have no right to exist.
Without any semblance of social skills, I dropped a "Fuck" like an atom bomb, putting my whole body into it. "Why are you an elf?"
She twiddled her knife ears like it was cute. "I like elves." That was the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen anyone do in my life. It was so ugly, I wanted to vomit but I didn’t know how to induce it.
"Elves suck."
She pouted. "You're mean."
"I don't care. They do."
Then she put her fist on my chest and winked. "Why not give me a hatefuck?"
I spread my arms. "I just met you. Why? Why can't we just not fuck each other ten seconds after meeting? We’ll all still live! And I'm especially not defiling my broken penis with elf pussy."
Again, she pouty and wigged her wrists by her eyes. "You're so mean!"
"How am I mean though?" I went full Travolta and looked back and forth between Tatiana and Maria. "What? She—you heard her, right? She wanted to fuck me the moment we met. Who actually does that? Wouldn’t it be better to err on the side of caution if someone you’ve literally never seen before immediately asks you fuck them?"
Maria grabbed my ear and pulled me away. "That reminds me. We have to make it back to our hideout so we can begin your sexual leveling. Are you ready for it?"
I wanted to tell her that she was a slut. I wanted to tell her that they were all freaks for caring about sex more than emotional stability or any semblance of common sense. I wanted to tell her that she had no reason to keep giving her body up to men as if we deserved it. I wanted to tell her that I had more respect than that and so should she.
So I said, "Fine. What the hell."
Because I had reached it. I reached a point of frustration so perfect, so beautiful, so serene that I didn't give a damn anymore. I lost everything. I was trapped in a video game. I was being bossed around, told to do bizarre missions for no reason, completely in the dark. And now hot women were throwing themselves at me when I really just wanted a cold one. One of those women was a damn elf. They had huge-ass tits, they had huge-tittin’ asses, they were either scantily clad or substituting ultra-tight clothes for skin, they ain’t got no reservations, they ain’t got no shame, and I stared back and forth between their boobs for about five minutes as they just stood there and pressed them together for utterly, utterly no reason. Even the elf.
So, you know what? I needed a bit of stress relief.
Because of course that's what you should do, the two new girls rode on the back of my bike with us to the hide-out. That was a fifteen-minute drive— though it felt like a few seconds because those two kept fondling me. Not to mention I was sure I felt one playing with herself and prayed to every god in the sky that it was Tatiana.
'Why am I so attractive all of a sudden?' I was always a rather plain looking guy. I had failed crushes in the past but I was never completely insecure about getting a woman to settle down with. There were billions better and billions worse in the rankings compared to me. Basically, I was average. I had girl friends. I wasn’t a creep or a weirdo, I knew what I was doing there and I usually belonged there. If I wanted, I could probably find someone desperate enough to give me a try. And yeah, she probably would have been a little plain too because we don’t all win 10s. So where did this harem of three 11s and
one literal non-number come from?
I decided that I wasn't going to complain. If a bunch of hot chicks (and an elf, I guess) were going to follow me around, I'd make the best of it. The more I stared at Ana’s smooshed ass riding on that blessed seat, the more I told myself, ‘And you’ve definitely gotta tap that pussy.’ I was licking my lips and swallowing, growing increasingly desperate to not let that fast pussycat get away.
While we were driving, Maria slowed down to match me and asked, “I don’t think you ever gave us the names of your friend and sister, little man.”
Because the rumbling of the road and engine agitated my bloodstained package, I shouted, “What’s it to ya?”
“B-because, idiot!” She actually said it. I couldn’t believe she actually said it. “We could share in your mourning if we knew their names. Otherwise, they’ll only ever be impersonal faceless NPCs in your life much the same way we were to you.”
I exploded, “You can’t be an NPC in real life!”
“You might as well be.”
I shook my head as one of the girls— please, let that be Tatiana— squeezed me harder. “Well, they’d want to be remembered anyway they can. My friend’s full name was Myles. Myles Frendo. And my sister’s full name was—is— Mya. Hence why my nicknames for them were ‘My Friend’ and ‘My Sister’. It just seemed so obvious, ya know?”
She let the engine roar for a few seconds, gawping at me. “So your last name is—”
“Sistar, yes. Alexei Sistar.”
She scowled and her face twitched like she had Tourette’s syndrome.
Ana shrugged.
What? Was there something wrong with that? They’re perfectly normal names. How was I the weird one was I was surrounded by a literal catgirl, a succubus with galaxies for boobs, a hot biker chick, and a thing?
At least I’d get some. And when I remembered that I stole some good loot off some Nazis, I pulled out a few health restoration potions— aka hard liquor and high-potency marijuana— and brought my HP back to 100%. I needed to consume all of them because I was broken. Even after I maxed out my health, I kept eating the stuff just to make sure everything returned to normal down there. And I couldn’t quite get all of it in my mouth at once because it was too much for me and made me choke— blimey, that came out wrong.
Unfortunately, that didn’t remove the blood, so I had to drive home uncomfortably sitting in jeans wet with my own blood. And when the sand kicked up, those coarse grains streaked straight into the worst areas to piss me off. Wet and sandy jeans against a rumbling leather seat: only the second worst sensation I felt during that drive.
BALLS TO THE WALL…
When we arrived home, Maria grabbed my hands and sprinted to a bed room in the back. She tore off my clothes and said, "Are you ready?" like she hadn’t eaten in years.
"Ready for what? It's just sex!"
She smirked. "You say that now..."
I mean, I wasn’t an incel so it’s not like I put sex on a pedestal of holy absolution. But while I was lost in my inner monologuing, Maria ripped off my jeans and bit tenderly at my underwear to pull them off as well.
She dropped the trousers and said, “Oh my!” She blushed. “I suppose you’re not such a little man after all…”
Even I went, “What the holy heck?” at the size of my giant shlong. Thankfully, there were no scars, but it was definitely stained with my blood. That wasn’t the issue. I’m comfortable enough with my masculinity to say the real thing was only slightly smaller than that nuclear submarine dangling around off my avatar. And right when I thought that Maria was going to spend more time slobbering all over it than sucking it, Ana picked her up by her armpits and set her aside. She kicked and squirmed all the way, but Ana came down and started stroking me off.
Not gonna lie, I didn’t really feel anything at first and thought it meant something. But after a few tugs, I felt the first pulse of pleasure. I knew from erotic games that video game sex was a pale imitation of the real thing— usually looking like ‘IKEA erotica’ more than anything you saw in even porn, but that just meant I wouldn’t have to deal with all the sloppiness and mistakes.
As Ana continued stroking me off, Maria sat there, watching her go and keeping an eye on me. Her palm got wet and red within seconds, and I would have thought she’d have been more— oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, there we go. I started getting sustained waves of that glorious inner-groin sweetness. She turned herself towards me slightly, eyes closed. She thrust her hand down the front of her pants. I could just barely make out the outline of her pussy.
I felt something sharp run across my back and when I turned, I saw that it was Maria’s own devil tail. She got down on her back and opened her legs to me. Then she started twiddling her own clit.
“This is happening,” I said. “This is actually happening.” I grinned. Tatiana and Olga were still outside, but I saw them peek through the beads.
I slid a hand under Ana’s jacket and felt her breasts. And goddamn me, I could have sworn they were even larger on the inside. Every time I gave it a squeeze, she rubbed herself harder until she was trembling and even mewing.
Mewing! She was taking this catgirl thing seriously far and hearing her little mews did it for me. I grabbed her waist and I felt her breathing getting faster. I grabbed her cheeks and pulled her head against my shoulder. She inhaled sharply. Her legs tensed and her back bowed. She was trembling more than Los Angeles in an earthquake. Then her rubbing started to slow down and she gasped several times, letting me know she finally came.
I reached out and squeezed her tail, and that got her rubbing more furiously again. Finally, she had enough and pushed herself up and turned around. That perfect pillow of an ass went right in my face and her tail slapped me across the cheek.
Before she could take them off, I grabbed that mushiness in the hard leather and squeezed it for all it was worth, taking a moment to digging my face in. Those curves, those perfect ass-curves! Finally, she got her pants down and exposed her bare ass and pussy. Her entire vulva was still soaked from her orgasm to the point she was dripping from her fur. She wagged her ass a bit more to get the pants off, letting me see that underthigh from a good angle. Hey, you gotta learn to love underthighs, one of the most underappreciated parts of the body and just as sexy as the ass if you know what to look for and are an educated man of culture— like me. I got a good look at the other underthigh and she tossed the pants away at the wall. Tatiana rushed to grab them and gave them a big hug as if she was going to lick them too.
Ana, though— she cared about only one thing: getting hard cock inside her right now. I don’t even think she cared where. She stood with an arched back between my legs, her furry cat pussy perfectly framed by her ass. I reached forwards and rubbed her off. She had flooded her pants, man, because I could wear her like a glove. She moaned and reached down to grab my cock. However, I wasn’t ready for penetration just yet, so I twisted her around. She swatted my hand away like it was a ball of yarn and dropped to her knees.
With a nice tug, she squeezed my dick and went to town on her own pussy. Then she started sucking me off and holy. Fuck. Let me tell you, it felt so good that I thought she blew cocaine into me and I was getting the effects instantly. But no, that’s just what a blow job feels like. And I got to feel every part of her throat as she choked trying to get all of me in her. Somehow, she did it. She went up and down, and I swore I felt her uvula several times. How she didn’t gag, I could only chalk up to the game itself.
And each time it did, I felt my penis begin to swell. The pulses within started turning into spasms.
I shouted, “Anastasia, holy fuck! Holy fuck!” And that was it, I was reduced to shouting ‘holy fuck’ over and over while she kept up this sexy-ass mixture of mews and a purr while trying to keep me in her mouth. Then I said, “I’m cumming, girl! I’m cumming!” I started bucking back and forth impulsively, and I bet I hit the back of her throat. Her tail wrapped around my leg and gave it a squeeze. “I’m cumming
! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!”
This game. I was here. It was real! I could stay here as long as I want fucking chicks, getting high, shooting Nazis, having a great time. And it looked real. It felt real. It fucking fucking fucking felt real oh yes, oh yes, oh fuck YES!
I grabbed the back of her head and shoved her on me as the spasms became orgasmic. I pumped a river down her throat as my jerks became like a jackhammer.
Finally, she fell back and I let out the biggest exhale of my life. My dick was completely clean and I was happy at last.
I didn’t even care about the incongruency. I just shouted, “YEAH.” Why was I past ‘beginner?’ Hell if I cared. It was the extra text after that which got my attention.
Oh my motherfucker. Did that say what I thought it said? It did! Longer orgasms. Honey baby, this game started getting groovy. Finally, right there in the corner just under the mana bar, I saw another milk-colored bar filling up fast. Considering how my rationality left me so quickly, I knew immediately what it was for.
Ana passed out on the floor, tongue hanging over the side of her mouth as she kept on purring. She was spent, that I could tell from her glistening pussy. Cat. I just had to say pussycat, because that was some fine-ass pussy that cat gave me.
Wait, she didn’t give me any pussy.
“Damn it,” I said. “I need actual pussy.” Right before I could point to any of the girls, I got a volunteer.
Guess who volunteered. No, seriously, guess who.
Guess.
Take a wild guess. I almost wanted to push her away and the way Olga kept Maria away from riding my dick made me think she was being greedy.