Signs of Love

by Kimberly Rae Jordan

  She signed Justin’s response for Caden then added on we’re going to eat. No more questions for now.

  Disappointment flashed across Caden’s face so quickly she almost missed it, but he nodded his understanding.

  “He didn’t like my answer?” Justin asked.

  Alana turned to him, more than a little surprised that he’d recognized Caden’s reaction when it had been so fleeting. “Your answer was fine. I just told him no more questions since we are going to be eating.”

  With that, Beth told them to take the rest of the food into the dining room while Daniel brought the large platter of meat. Alana breathed a sigh of relief when she realized the seating arrangement didn’t put her right next to Justin. His presence was overwhelming in a terrifyingly familiar way. If she had known exactly what sort of man Beth’s brother was, she would never have agreed to this. As it was, it took everything within her to keep her hands from shaking as she passed bowls of food and dished up her plate and Caden’s.

  Conversation between the three others at the table swirled around her while she tried to eat what she’d taken, but her appetite had long since fled. A touch on her arm drew her attention from the food she was pushing around on her plate. She looked down at Caden, waiting for him to begin to sign something.

  Instead, he left his hand on her arm, his eyes asking all his questions. From very young, he’d learned how to decipher her expressions and body language. With it just being the two of them so much, he’d always been able to pick up on her moods. And right then, she knew he sensed her unease…her fear.

  He lifted his hand from her arm and signed to her. Why scared, Mama?

  Underlying the question in his eyes was a bit of anxiety as well. She hadn’t wanted that for him. She had to do a better job of keeping her emotions tamped down. Taking a deep breath, she smiled and then tried to ease his worries. Not scared, baby. Just thinking about something. But you don’t need to worry. Mama will take care of it.

  She could tell he still wasn’t totally convinced but eventually, after a quick glance at the man sitting on his other side, Caden turned his attention back to his food.

  “Everything okay, Alana?”

  “Everything’s great.” Alana gave her friend a quick smile. “You’re such a great cook, Beth.”

  A tense silence fell over the table, and Alana knew she wasn’t the only one responsible for it. She shot a glance at Justin and saw that as Beth had promised, he had polished off a whole lot of the roast. But now he set his knife and fork across the empty plate and turned his gaze to his sister.

  “What’s going on, Beth?” When she didn’t answer right away, Alana saw Justin shift his attention to his brother-in-law. “Dan?”

  The other man cleared his throat and took a drink of water before looking at Justin. Alana held her breath, knowing what was to come. She wanted to move Caden away from Justin, uncertain of how the large, muscular man was going to react.

  “Someone tell me what’s going on.” The firm tone of Justin’s voice brooked no further delays.

  He glanced at her as if she would be the one to tell him. At the sight of the barely contained frustration in his gaze, Alana felt a vice tighten around her throat. Would the frustration flash into anger and then into violence? Right then all those emotions seemed to be rolling off him in waves.

  “Uh, a few months ago Beth and I noticed something about Genevieve—”

  “Something’s wrong with Genevieve?”

  Since her gaze was already on him, Alana saw the momentary panic on Justin’s face.

  “Yes.” This time it was Beth who spoke. “She’s experiencing hearing loss.”

  “Hearing loss?” Alana saw Justin’s gaze shoot to Caden then back to Beth. “She’s deaf?”

  She slipped her arm around Caden’s shoulders. When she looked down at him, she could see the confusion on his face. She’d already explained to Caden about Genevieve’s diagnosis, so when she signed that they were telling Justin about it, he understood immediately what was going on.

  Both Beth and Daniel nodded in response to Justin’s question, but it was Daniel who gave him more information. “We’d been noticing over the last several months that she wasn’t responding as she should to noises…sounds. When we took her in for her two-year appointment, we mentioned it to the doctor. Since then, we’ve been taking her for a variety of different tests.”

  Justin crossed his arms. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  Alana could see emotion swirling in his eyes, but his face looked like it had been carved from granite. She noticed that he still hadn’t looked at Genevieve. Was he going to reject the little girl over this?

  Beth lifted her chin. “We wanted to have some answers before we told you. There’s nothing you can do. There’s nothing any of us can do at this point beyond accepting the diagnosis and adjusting to the new normal of our life.”

  Justin’s lips thinned as his brows drew together. “Why did she go deaf? She wasn’t born that way.”

  “They don’t know. We’ve gone through genetic testing and all kinds of other tests for her and still don’t have a definite answer to that,” Daniel explained. His jaw tightened, and Alana knew he was trying to keep his emotions in check.

  She’d come to know Daniel and Beth well during the past few weeks. Beth had seen her at church signing in the service and then later with Caden and had approached her. She still remembered seeing the weary, sad and confused look on Beth’s face when she’d asked her about Caden’s deafness. Alana had offered to come and talk with them both about her experiences parenting a deaf child.

  Of course, she hadn’t known then that Beth had a brother who would trigger memories she’d rather not have.

  “I can’t accept that. They must have some explanation. A child doesn’t just go deaf for no apparent reason.”

  Beth laid her hand on his arm. “We’re still looking for answers, trying to figure out what has happened to her. But in the meantime, we’re doing what we can to make sure we can still communicate with her and help her communicate with us.”

  Justin’s gaze landed on Alana with such force her lungs constricted, holding the air there captive. He stared at her then looked at Caden before turning his attention back to Beth.

  “Alana knows sign language. You might have seen her signing during the services at church. We’ve asked her to help us learn it and to also begin to teach Genevieve.” Beth hesitated then said, “I’d like you to learn as well.”

  He shot another look at her, and Alana found herself hoping he’d say no.

  “I want a second opinion. If it’s money, I can—“

  “No.” Daniel spoke softly but firmly. “We’ve had second and third opinions, Justin. And money won’t fix this. Nothing will.”

  Justin pushed back from the table and got to his feet. “I need to go.”

  “Justin, please,” Beth pleaded as she and Daniel also stood. “Don’t leave. Talk to me.”

  “I have to go.” Justin turned and disappeared through the doorway.

  Beth’s shoulders slumped as she looked at her husband. “Well, that went about as well as I expected.”

  Daniel put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. Alana felt a flash of envy at the gentle way he gathered Beth into his arms and stroked her hair, whispering to her. She wondered what it would be like to have that kind of tenderness in a relationship.

  There was a sudden movement in the doorway, and Justin stepped back into the room. He wore his leather jacket again and had the duffle bag he’d arrived with in his hand. With a grim set to his features, he walked to where Genevieve sat and dropped into a crouch next to her high chair. The little girl smiled at him, and Alana saw pain flash across his face as he leaned forward and pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead.

  Then he went to where his sister and brother-in-law stood and rested his free hand on Daniel’s shoulder as he bent to kiss the top of Beth’s head. “I’ll call you.”

  And then he w
as gone.

  For the first time since Justin had walked into the house and dominated it with his presence, Alana felt the tightness in her chest ease, allowing her to take a deep breath. Somehow she was going to have to tell Beth there was no way she could help her brother learn sign language.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Justin grabbed the handle and with a vicious jerk slammed the door of his truck closed. He twisted the key in the ignition and backed out of the driveway, barely waiting for the vehicle to stop reversing before throwing it into drive and peeling away from the house. When he got to the highway, he was sorely tempted to return to the compound where he could make use of the wide range of exercise equipment there to help him burn off the emotions that raged inside him.

  But he had a bag full of wet laundry and a meeting he had to be at the next morning, so he turned the truck toward his original destination. As he drove, Justin let loose with all the words he’d kept locked up while listening to Dan and Beth explain what had happened to Genevieve. The habit of swearing he’d picked up while in the military had been something he’d worked hard to overcome through the years, but in that moment of emotional…weakness, it was what seemed to fit the situation. Only it didn’t make him feel any better. If anything, he felt worse.

  Forgive me, Lord.

  He pounded on the steering wheel with a fist, still needing some way to vent his anger and frustration. There had to be something he could do. He liked Dan and believed the man thought he’d done all he could for Genevieve, but Justin needed to know he’d done all he could do for her himself. He just didn’t want to believe that his beautiful blue-eyed, blonde-haired niece was going to be sentenced to a life of silence.

  He couldn’t accept that.

  He just couldn’t.

  And the woman who had been there to help them adjust could just go away. They wouldn’t need her. He would find a way to make sure Genevieve could hear again if it was the last thing he did. Tragedy had already rocked their lives. He couldn’t let this be one more.

  Justin stalked into the boardroom at the BlackThorpe building the next morning. He looked around the room, noting that all members of the team were present except for Than Miller.

  “Morning, Justin,” Marcus Black said, his voice deep. Though he didn’t have Justin’s height, the man carried himself in such a way as to dominate any room he entered.

  “Marc,” Justin said with a nod of his head.

  Marcus’s lips thinned at his use of the shortened version of his name, but Justin didn’t give a flip. Most people didn’t understand the relationship between them, and that was fine by him. The fact that it was none of their business seemed to be the only thing he and Marcus agreed on anymore.

  Justin dropped down into the chair next to Melanie, knowing she shared his impatience with these weekly meetings. The two of them spent most their time out of the main BlackThorpe complex and hated being dragged in each week.

  Melanie stared at him, her eyes going wide. “Wow, Justin. Everything okay? You look…rough.”

  Justin rubbed his fingers over his chin, knowing the day’s growth of facial hair when he was usually clean-shaven gave him that rough look. Unfortunately, after sleeping in later than usual, he’d skipped shaving in order to be on time for the meeting. He’d take care of it when he got back to the compound once this infernal meeting was over.

  After he’d gotten home the night before, Justin had spent a lot of time on the internet trying to learn more about hearing loss in children. The results had not been encouraging and without having more information about the tests that had been done so far on Genevieve, he’d been searching somewhat blindly. The one thing that had stood out to him though was the large percentage of cases of unexplained hearing loss where the cause was unknown. That didn’t sit well with him at all. How could he fix things for Genevieve when he didn’t know what was wrong?

  “Everything’s fine,” he told Melanie. Never one to share much of his life outside of work, he certainly wasn’t going to start now.

  If he had shared anything with anyone, it might have been Melanie, but he preferred to keep his personal life separate from his job. He had a congenial relationship with most members of the BlackThorpe team except for Marcus, but he rarely socialized with them.

  Melanie gave him a skeptical look, but she didn’t say anything further as Marcus started the meeting.

  “First up, as you know, Than is currently over in the Philippines. We’ve just received word that there is a super typhoon closing in on his location. We are monitoring the situation and will make arrangements to evacuate him and Lindsay Hamilton if it becomes necessary. In the meantime, he has been in contact via the sat phone and doesn’t seem to feel that evacuation is imminent at this point.”

  Though Than could be a pain in the butt with his easygoing, carefree attitude sometimes, the man excelled at his job. Given Than’s persistent attempts to get him to go out to socialize more, Justin never felt guilty about giving him a weekly beat down when he’d come to the gym at the compound. Still, he wished no harm to the man and hoped he and the woman he was protecting would be safe for the duration of the storm.

  Justin tried to focus on the discussions that went on around him, but he didn’t contribute. That likely surprised no one present. If he had comments to make, he usually reserved them for after the meeting and spoke with the person they pertained to. It drove Marcus crazy, but Justin knew he would never call him on it. The bottom line was that if he ever felt something was worth commenting on, Marcus knew what he said would have weight and value.

  As he drew circles on the notepad in front of him, Justin accepted that his distraction wasn’t solely because of the news of Genevieve’s hearing loss. The presence of that woman—Alana Jensen—only added to his unease over the whole situation. To him, she signified his sister and Dan’s capitulation to Genevieve’s diagnosis. Instead of wasting time and money learning sign language, they should be spending that time contacting doctors and anyone else who could give them the answers they needed to make Genevieve right again.

  But it wasn’t just that, there had been a flash of what his instinct said was fear when his gaze met Alana’s for the first time. The boy at her side hadn’t seemed to share that feeling, but there had definitely been something about Justin that alarmed her. He wasn’t unaware of the visual impact his size and countenance had on people—in fact, Justin counted on it. People didn’t question him, didn’t disagree with him. Most of all, they tended to just leave him alone. But usually when his presence inspired fear in someone it was because they had done something wrong, or they had something to hide.

  Was she out to scam Beth and Dan? Beth had said they’d met at church, but in his mind, that made absolutely no difference. In fact, what better place than church for scam artists to find people willing to accept a person without question? His sister’s horrible habit of embracing everyone, accepting them at face value, would get her into trouble sooner or later. Dan wasn’t much different even though he was an FBI agent and should know better.

  And the fact that Alana was an attractive woman with a young son didn’t lessen the feeling that she could be a threat to his family. He had never allowed himself to be swayed by a woman’s beauty before, and he wasn’t about to start now.

  There was no way he would let this woman take advantage of his sister and Dan in the midst of everything else they were going through. His job gave him the resources to do a background check on her, but Beth would be furious if he just presented her with facts. He needed to get his sister to see for herself what this woman was doing.

  Because he had little doubt she was up to something.

  ~*~*~

  Alana pushed the cart through the aisles of the store, trying to ignore the knot in her stomach. She hated grocery shopping anymore. Prices seemed to be constantly going up and though she wanted to buy lots of good food for Caden, it was hard to stretch her money in that way. In the end, she usually bought what she could of the fres
h fruit and vegetables, knowing that Caden would be the only one to eat them, and then added in the cheaper, less healthy, foods like mac and cheese and ramen noodles.

  Shopping for groceries also served to remind her of what she’d given up when she’d grabbed Caden and run from the only home he’d ever known. As she stared blankly at the shelf in front of her, Alana wondered if she’d made a mistake. Maybe Craig wouldn’t have turned his abuse to Caden. At least when they’d lived with him, they’d had money for food—good, healthy food. Craig may have had a nasty streak in him, but he’d also wanted the best for his temple, so he’d insisted Alana only buy the healthiest food for them. She’d taken Caden from that because she told herself it was only a matter of time before her son felt the pain of Craig’s heavy hand as she had for the past five years.

  But had that been the real reason?

  An overwhelming ache settled over her. Every bruise, cut and burn her body had ever borne, every bone that had ever been broken, once again pulsed with pain. She pressed a hand to her chest. In truth, Craig had ignored Caden ninety-nine percent of the time. From the minute he’d discovered his son was deaf, he’d wanted nothing to do with him. However, he put on a good front when around his friends and business acquaintances. Caden had gone to the best school in Miami, and everyone had complimented Craig on how well he cared for his deaf son.

  Unfortunately, they didn’t see behind the scenes.

  Maybe she should have been able to endure more for Caden’s sake. He’d still be going to the school he loved instead of being homeschooled by her. He’d have lots of good food and a nice home instead of the run-down one bedroom apartment they lived in now.

  Alana blinked back the tears as she reached for the boxes of mac and cheese on the shelf in front of her. Thankfully, she even had coupons for them this week. With a resigned sigh, she shook off the hurt and doubt-filled thoughts. She wanted to finish this up and get back to the apartment. The older woman next door watched Caden when she needed to go out, but she never liked to leave him for too long. She’d stopped bringing him with her to go grocery shopping because she’d been unable to deal with his repeated requests for all the treats she couldn’t afford to buy him.