Healing Hearts

by Syndi Powell

  He nodded and took a seat next to her on the bed. He found the place they’d left off the last time and started to read. She rested her head on his shoulder, and he breathed in the floral scent of her shampoo, storing this memory away to pull out when he missed her. April leaned against the far wall and listened as he read.

  The chapter over, he handed his mother the book. “We can read the next chapter tomorrow when I visit.”

  “Promise?”

  He did so and kissed her forehead. “April and I have to go now. Do you need anything else?”

  His mother looked around the room and frowned. “I wish you didn’t have to go so soon.”

  “I know, Mom.” Truth was, the longer he stretched out the visit, the harder it got to get up and leave. He had to do it. To walk out of the facility and leave her behind. And he’d found excuses to put it off until he didn’t have any more. “I’ll be back tomorrow afternoon for lunch.”

  She turned to April. “You, too?”

  “I’d love to, Kate, but I have plans already. I will visit soon, though.” She walked over to Zach and took his hand in hers. “We need to leave.”

  Zach kissed his mom again, then stood and followed April to the door. He turned and fought the tears that threatened at the back of his throat. “Love you, Mom.”

  “You, too, Zach. You’ll tell your father where to find me?”

  “You know I will.”

  All the way down the hall, April squeezed his hand. “Stay strong for just a little longer. Wait until we get out into the parking lot.”

  He nodded and kept facing forward. They moved briskly through the lobby. He waved at Holly before walking out the front doors and down the sidewalk that led to the parking lot. When they reached his car, he pulled April into his arms and buried his face into her shoulder.

  She held him as he cried, rubbing his back and whispering words of comfort. He clung to her and kept his eyes shut, letting the fear and doubt fill his body and empty into his tears. April put a hand on the back of his head and stroked his hair. “She’ll be okay, Zach. This is the best place for her.”

  “I know.”

  “You don’t have to worry. They’ll take good care of her.”

  “I know. So why am I so upset?”

  “Because you’ve been taking care of her on your own since you were a kid, and it’s hard to let someone else take over.” April cupped his face in her hands so that he had to look down at her, and he saw tears on her cheeks, too.

  He stared into her baby blue eyes and found a safe place for him to fall. “You’ve been amazing through all this. I don’t think I could have survived today on my own. Thank you for being here.”

  “It’s been my honor.”

  He took a deep shuddering breath, and she wiped his tears away with her thumbs. They shared a smile, tremulous at best, then got into the car. They held hands as he drove out of the parking lot and back to his empty house.

  He turned to her and smiled. “Would you like to go out tomorrow night? Just the two of us for dinner.”

  “You don’t need to repay me.”

  “No, I was thinking more like a date. Our third, if my math is correct.”

  She blushed and dipped her head. “Yes. I’d love to.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  APRIL PROPPED HER bike next to the porch, jogged up the steps to the door and knocked. Waiting, she looked out at the street and other houses. It was barely spring, and most of the snow had melted in preparation for the changing season. She couldn’t wait until the warmer air became scented with lilacs and tulips. She twitched her nose in anticipation and smiled. The front door opened, and Page glared out at her. “What?”

  “Is that any way to greet your best friend who brought you treats?” She held up the plastic bag that had ginger ale and saltine crackers. “They’re your favorite.”

  “Hardly.” Page stepped aside and waved her inside. “I’m going to go collapse on the sofa, if you don’t mind.”

  “I volunteered to come and stay with you on your bad days, you know.” She put the plastic bag on the coffee table, pulled a crocheted afghan from the back of the sofa and covered Page with it. “It’s pretty bad this time, huh?”

  Page moaned and tugged the blanket over her head. “Please stop talking. Everything hurts. I’m nauseous. And all I want to do is sleep.”

  “Do you need anything?”

  “No. Sherri stopped over earlier with groceries, and Mom called with a pep talk.”

  April rolled her eyes. She knew Mrs. Kosinski’s idea of encouraging Page. It usually started with a list of things she’d done to cause the trouble herself and concluded with a guilt trip about her not visiting often enough. “Then you definitely needed me to come over.” She took a seat in the recliner next to the sofa where Page lay. “Are you taking leave from work?”

  “No, but I’m going down to part-time hours. I don’t need extra time at home to feel sorry for myself, but I can’t put in full days like I have been.” She tucked the afghan under her chin. “Luckily, Joanne didn’t want to lose me, so she agreed to my demands.”

  April shook her head, but smiled. “Your supervisor would do whatever you asked because she knows you’re the best.”

  “I’m not sure. There’s a new girl who started that could be a threat to my status as favorite.”

  April reached over and touched her hand. “You’re always my favorite.”

  “You’re easy to please.” But Page grinned at this. “So how did the big move go?”

  “He’s emotional, which is understandable. I mean, he’s been taking care of her for so long. I’m afraid that he’ll feel a little lost without the day-to-day responsibility weighing him down.” She shrugged and glanced at her hands. “He did ask me out for dinner tonight, though.”

  Page’s mouth formed an O, and she chuckled. “Well, well, well. Looks like he’s making his move.”

  “According to him, it will be our third date.”

  “So it’s getting serious.”

  April wasn’t convinced. Sure, they’d shared some meals together. She’d helped him as he settled his mother in the new facility. He’d even treated her to upgrades to her New York City visit. But serious? It seemed like they should have had a conversation about that. Maybe that was what the dinner invitation was about. He wanted to talk about them as a couple.

  Page turned onto her side and moaned as she moved. “I hate this part of treatment.”

  “I didn’t know you had a part you enjoyed.”

  “I like it when it’s over.” She adjusted her blanket. “Dr. Frazier’s talking about three months on chemo, then a month off, surgery, and another three months depending on my numbers.”

  “So we’ll hope that you won’t need any more after surgery.”

  Page laughed, but she didn’t sound amused. “You know my history. I have bad luck when it comes to cancer.”

  “Luck or not, you can beat this. And I’ll be here every step of the way.”

  “That’s what I’m worried about.”

  April rolled her eyes a second time, but chuckled. “You love me, and you know it. You couldn’t get through this without me.”

  “That’s because you won’t let me try it on my own.”

  The two friends grinned at each other. Finally, Page closed her eyes. “I hope you won’t think I’m a bad friend if I take a nap. I don’t think I can keep my eyes open any longer.”

  “You sleep. I’ll clean.”

  Page’s eyes flew open, and she propped herself up on one elbow. “You don’t have to do that.”

  “It’s not like you’re going to feel up to doing it for a while.” She pressed at Page to lie back down on the sofa. “I won’t mess up how you keep things. I know what a neat freak you are.”

  “No switching cans around in the cupboard, or han
ging my clothes up out of order?”

  April knew that Page liked stuff organized alphabetically or by color. It was probably a reaction to the chaos that she’d grown up with in her mother’s house. “Don’t worry. I’ll put everything where it belongs.”

  “I’ve got shelves labeled if you get confused.”

  “Of course you do.” April felt her friend’s forehead with the back of her hand and frowned. “You seem a little warm. I’ll bring you an aspirin if you think you can keep it down.”

  “It’s probably a side effect, but I’ll keep an eye on it.”

  “So will I.” She retrieved the bottle of aspirin and brought it to Page. She shook two pills into Page’s hand and watched as her friend swallowed the medication with water. “Get some sleep. You can’t risk getting sick on top of everything else.”

  “Yes, Doctor.”

  * * *

  APRIL SAT AT a table and played with the paper from her straw, winding it around her fingers one way, then rewinding it the other way. She glanced at her watch. Zach had said he’d meet her at the popular barbecue place after his visit with his mom, but he was almost an hour late. The waiter stopped by the table and pointed to the other chair. She shook her head. “He hasn’t arrived yet, but I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

  She took out her cell phone and shot off a quick text asking where he was. She glanced around the crowded restaurant and watched several happy couples as they chatted over their meals. Sighing, she looked at the empty chair. Checked her phone. Still no response.

  The front door opened and Zach breezed in. He smiled when he spotted her. “Sorry. She didn’t want me to leave tonight,” he said as he collapsed into a chair.

  April accepted his excuse. “It’s fine. She’s still nervous about being in a new place without you. She’ll adjust.”

  “I’m meeting with the medical staff Wednesday night so that we can discuss her treatment plan. In the meantime, they’re running tests and adjusting her medication.”

  “Good. She needed that.” April handed him a menu. “I’m starving.”

  “Me, too. I was there most of the day and didn’t get a chance to eat.” He perused the choices.

  April set her menu down. “Even though she’s not in the house with you, you still need to take care of yourself. How did you sleep?”

  “Sleep? What’s that?” When she gave him a look, he laughed and shook his head. “I got a full eight hours. Even if I did wake up a couple of times thinking that I heard her calling for me.”

  “I’m serious. You can’t keep going like you are or you’ll end up in my ER with exhaustion.”

  “I’m fine.”

  The waiter arrived and they ordered their meals. April sat back in her seat, not ready to let it go. “Are you sure?”

  “Well, it’s not the same without her there.”

  “This is an adjustment for you both.”

  He reached across the table and took her hand in his. “I don’t want to talk about my mom anymore. I’d rather talk about us.” He kissed one of her knuckles. “I have more freedom in my life, and I’d like to explore it with you.”

  Her chest got warm and her breath caught in her throat. “Really?”

  He smiled at the crack in her voice. “Yes. I want to help you with your list. What do you have planned next?”

  The list? Why couldn’t she think rationally when he looked at her in that way? She scrambled for a coherent idea. “A bike tour of an older neighborhood in Detroit. It’s this coming Saturday. Would you like to come with me?”

  “Bike tour, huh?” He rubbed the back of his neck, and she wasn’t sure if he was interested in it or not. “I haven’t been on a bike in years.”

  “Neither was I until a few weeks ago.”

  He gave a nod. “All right, I’ll do it. Do you want me to pick you up?”

  “Actually, I’ll give you the directions to where we have to meet. I was planning on riding my bike there instead of driving.”

  “Oh. Okay.”

  “And my one year anniversary of being cancer-free is coming up, so I’m throwing a party.”

  “I’ll definitely be there for that. I’ll even bring chips.”

  Their salads came, and Zach dug into his. She paused and watched him as he shoveled the lettuce into his mouth. “You must be really hungry.”

  He stopped the fork midway to his mouth. “I am. Like I said before, I didn’t want to leave my mom, so I skipped lunch.” He finished his bite, then wiped his mouth with a napkin. “I got good news. I called my boss, and I return to work on Tuesday.”

  “That’s great. I’m sure you’re anxious to get back to a normal routine.”

  “My normal involved worrying about my mother’s mental state, and if I was going to get called out of an important meeting to go take care of something she needed.” He lowered his head to stare at the plate and picked at the salad. “What I’m living now is something completely different.”

  Now it was her turn to reach over and grab his hand. “I know that you’re confused and hurting, but it’s going to be okay. You’ll find you will be happier in the long run.”

  He raised his head to glare at her. “How can I be happy when my mother is wondering where I am? She thinks I’m leaving her in there and will never visit.”

  “You know that you’re going to be there checking up on her as much as you can.”

  “But she doesn’t believe that.”

  “You both need to adjust to this new reality. Everything will be okay.”

  He removed his hand from hers and put it in his lap. “Right now, I don’t need these platitudes. Let me have my feelings. I’m angry and concerned.”

  April bit her lip to keep from saying anything and forked a piece of lettuce instead. Zach sipped his water, looking everywhere in the room but at her. They ate in silence until the server arrived to remove their half-eaten salads. “Zach, I’m not saying that you can’t be hurt or upset. I’m saying that eventually you’ll both be better off.”

  He stood and removed some bills from his wallet and threw them on the table. “I apologize for my bad mood, but I can’t sit here right now. Maybe dinner tonight was a bad idea. I’ll talk to you later.”

  April watched openmouthed as he left the restaurant without her.

  * * *

  ZACH SAT IN his car for a few moments, stewing in his thoughts. He hadn’t meant to get so mad at April. He’d come this evening hoping to start a real relationship with her, to talk about a future together. But her optimism had grated against his sour mood. It wasn’t her fault that he’d left his mother’s room at the nursing home wondering if he’d done the right thing. She didn’t know that his mother’s tears as he left had fed the guilt that already filled his chest.

  He knew in his brain that moving his mother to the nursing home was best for both of them, but his heart ached with how miserable she seemed each time he left. Maybe April was right. It would get easier with time, but for now it bothered him and left him feeling like a terrible son.

  He started his car and glanced out the windshield. April stood under the front awning of the restaurant, two plastic food containers in her hands. Her shoulders hunched over, she walked in the opposite direction. He debated for a few seconds, then opened his car door and called her name. She paused and turned at the sound, but stood on the sidewalk staring at him. He crossed the street to reach her, not looking to see if oncoming traffic headed his way. A car blared its horn at him, but he didn’t care.

  As he approached her, she didn’t smile or give him any encouragement. But then he’d acted enough of a jerk earlier that he had to be the one to make the first move. He put his hands on both sides of her face and peered into her eyes. “Forgive me? You’ve done nothing but be supportive and sweet, and I’m sorry for taking my anger out on you.”

  She blinked a few t
imes, then nodded. “I only want what’s best for you. You have to believe that.”

  “I do. And that’s what makes you so special.” He placed a soft kiss on her mouth, and she leaned into him when he started to step away. Not wanting to disappoint her, he deepened the kiss. Hoped that he could express with the kiss what he hadn’t with his words.

  After they broke apart, he wiped the moisture from under her eyes with his thumbs. “Why don’t we take the food back to my house? I really need a friend to talk to right now.”

  She smiled. “I’d like that.” She waved at the row of bicycles chained to a black metal rack. “If you take these containers, I’ll ride my bike and meet you there.”

  “Let’s put your bike in the back of my car and ride together.”

  She carried the food while he wheeled the bike to his car. Once the bike was secure, they got in the car and he drove them to his house. They ate right out of the containers in the living room, knee to knee on the sofa. He shared his fears about his mother’s condition worsening. She told him about Page’s rough reaction to chemo. They finished eating and held hands while they disclosed the things closest to their hearts.

  She yawned and glanced at her watch, then bolted upright. “It’s after midnight. I have to work tomorrow at six.”

  He hated to see her go, didn’t want to be left alone, but knew she needed to get home. He walked her to the side door and held it open for her. She paused for a moment, then reached up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “Good night.”

  “Wait.”

  He grabbed her arm and pulled her to him. He lowered his head and touched his lips to hers. She sighed into the kiss.

  When they broke apart, she looked as dazed as he felt. He kissed the tip of her nose. “I’ll drive you home.”

  “But my bike...”

  “Is already in the back of my car.”

  * * *

  THE OFFICE CHATTER quieted as Zach stepped off the elevator and made his way between the rows of cubicles to his office. Dalvin stood as he passed by and followed him inside, closing the door behind him. “That was a fantastic entrance. They’ll be talking about it for days among the assistants.”