Saving Him

by Drea Roman

  I laughed out loud at that thought. Not a growly dominance bear indeed. Refocusing my attention on the prophylactic selection in front of me, I squint at the variety of sizes. Fuck, I don’t know! I haven't seen Roger naked. Yet, I remind myself. I haven’t seen Roger naked yet. My hope is to remedy that lack tonight. A thrill runs through me, and I look around nervously. God, Tyler. Just pick something. I don’t want to assume anything, so I grab three different sizes of Trojans. Okay, that covers that. I almost titter. I’m acting like a virginal school boy, but Roger makes me feel younger, less jaded. It’s surprising since I could be jaded after what happened with Eric. No, I remind myself. Roger, my counselor, and amazingly even I, are in agreement on this. Taking a deep breath, I whisper to myself. “What Eric did to me. I didn’t do anything wrong.”

  Every single time I say it, it is easier to form the words, and I believe it just a little bit more. And trust myself a little bit more, which is why, I can, with confidence, buy condoms and lube, because I want Roger more than I’ve ever wanted anyone in my life. And it’s far more than deep and all consuming passion than I’ve ever felt before.

  A new thought occurs to me as I wrap my fingers around a bottle of Astroglide and drop it into the basket at my feet. Maybe Roger doesn’t top? I look down at the contents of my basket. Well, I do have the regular size condoms which would work for me. A blush blazes across my face, and again I glance around the aisle like a guilty teenager. Sighing, I shake my head. I guess I will find out tonight. Maybe. I bite my lip as my mind spins with worries. Even though our conversation barely a week ago confirmed that the attraction is very much mutual and that we both want more, I can’t help but worry that Roger may have changed his mind. That maybe I waited a day too long. Breathing deeply, I try to steady myself. I won’t know until I ask. Or offer. Myself. God, I’m so nervous.

  Sighing, I bend over and retrieve the basket from the floor. Looping the metal handle over my arm, I make a beeline for the candy aisle and some cherry Pull ’n’ Peel Twizzlers. Roger isn’t Eric, I calmly repeat to myself inside my head, over and over again as I check out, as I drive the short distance from the drugstore back to Roger’s house, as I climb the outside stairs to the second floor and use the key he gave me the first week to unlock the door. I haven’t been back to my apartment since the attack even though I’ve let the automatic rent payments go through. Though Eric never lived there with me and I know I shouldn’t be afraid of the place, I am. I should just call and give the landlord notice. Though I’m not sure where I would put my stuff, storage maybe, I do know where I want to stay: with Roger. Not in the guest room anymore, but in his bed, with him.

  I want to go to sleep every night in his arms and wake every morning with mine wrapped around his big frame. Sighing, I plop down on the sofa with my bag. Pulling out the candy, I open the seal and yank out a piece of the red licorice. Sticking the end in my mouth, I lean my head back against the couch as I chew. Closing my eyes, I savor the sweet flavor and suddenly I’m overcome with a wave of pure joy. Closing my eyes, I allow the waiting tears of relief and full happiness to flow down my cheeks.

  I must fall asleep because the next thing I know a key is jiggling in the door knob. Jumping up, I grab the drugstore bag and shove it under the afghan on the end of the couch. Shit. Roger is not supposed to be home yet. It’s only 3 p.m., and he has tattoos scheduled up to 5. Or it was only 3 p.m. when I got back from the drugstore. Glancing quickly at my watch, I realize I was only asleep for half an hour. Whew. I didn’t sleep away my preparation time. But if Roger is here, I’m out of time anyway.

  The door opens and Roger walks in, glances around, obviously looking for me. My flustered state must show on my face.

  “You okay, Tyler? I saw your car pull in, and I thought I would pop up to say hi.”

  Warmth floods me and I’m moving before I realize it. Roger is still standing in the doorway, but I snuggle myself against his chest and thread my arms around him back, pulling him down toward me. Tucking my head into the crook of his neck, I inhale his dark, masculine scent, and nearly shudder in pleasure.

  “I’m perfect.” I whisper against his pulse before kissing it lightly. Pulling back, I tip my head back to meet his gaze. He looks stunned for a moment, as if the kiss on his neck just registered in his mind. While Roger has kissed me, on the ear, the neck, the top of the head, I’ve never kissed him in any way until just now.

  “Tyler?” He asks, his voice a touchy shaky. Pulling in a deep breath, I plunge forward, revising my plans as I go. Looking into his dark brown eyes, I smile and jump off the cliff, hoping against hope he jumps with me. “I love you, Roger.”

  A stunned joy lights up his face, and his smile pulls his auburn bearded cheeks wide. “Really, Tyler?”

  When I nod and smile, he leans forward, brushing his lips gently against mine, his mustache tickling my upper lip. “Tyler, I love you, so much.”

  I’ve been dying to say those words to Tyler for so long I can barely believe I am saying them now. I can barely believe how he has come to me or that he’s chosen me. I press my mouth more firmly to his soft, sweet lips, then dart my tongue out to lick his bottom lip. Tyler moans, the sound vibrating into my mouth as his lips part so his tongue can touch mine. Gliding his tongue over mine, he tilts his head for a better angle, then unwinds his arms from around my back to slip them around my neck. I could stand in the open doorway of my house kissing Tyler forever, but he seems to have other plans. Softening the kiss, he pulls back, which also involves him dropping down from his tippy toes. Our height difference has never been so obvious. A possessive passion grows inside me, and I want to pick him up and carry him to my bedroom and my bed. I pull back from his lips so I can voice the desire, but he beats me to it.

  “Roger,” he whispers almost shyly, even as his eyes hold mine with a steady and ever increasingly confidence. “Please shut the door. I want to make love with you. Exhibitionism really isn’t my thing.” He must appreciate what I can only guess is a surprised expression on my face, because he smiles widely and laughs. “I guess it’s my turn to surprise you.”

  “Umm, you’ve done nothing but surprise me since I walked through the door.”

  “Speaking off, aren’t you supposed to be shutting that?”

  He drops his hands from my neck, running them down my tattooed arms, intertwining his left with my right, leaving my other hand free to reach back and slam the door, which I do without looking away from his face.

  Tyler giggles, “I think you need to lock that. ”

  Growling, I turn back toward the door long enough to flip the locks. When I turn around to face him, he is smilingly so radiantly that I’m stunned still for a second. A question spills out of my mouth, the words so full of longing that I’m almost embarrassed, almost, but not quite. “Are you happy now, Tyler?”

  His smile shines a warm light into my heart, my soul. “Yes. But Roger, I could be even happier.”

  “What do you need?” I ask urgently, willing to give him anything.

  “You. Just you, Roger.”

  It’s my turn to smile, and it’s so wide my cheeks hurt. “Don’t you know, Tyler? I’m all yours.”

  “What do you want?” I murmur against his lips as I walk him backward toward my bed. He falls backwards and stretches like a kitten on my king size bed. Raising his head up, he looks around himself and grins. Falling back again, he windmills his arms and legs back and forth on the bed.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I’m making a snow angel.”

  Laughing, I crawl onto the bed and over him, settle my weight down on top of him, stilling his legs and trapping them between mine. I nip at his lip before replying. “You are my angel.”

  His amber eyes burn with intensity, and he licks his lips sensuously, no trace of nervousness evident on his face. “Now that you have me so conveniently trapped beneath your muscular, warm body, whatever are you going to do with me?”

  My cock, lodged conveniently a
gainst his groin, throbs with desire. Shifting my hips forward, I begin to rock against him. “Whatever my Tyler Twink wants.”

  “Tyler Twink?” he asks, amusement evident in his voice.

  Laughing, I kiss his cheek. “Well, you are one, aren’t you?

  He chews his bottom lip and confidently declares, “I want to make love with you, my Roger Bear.”

  I chuckle at the new nickname. “I’ve graduated to full bear, have I?”

  “Yes,” he murmurs, “and you’re just the bear I want.”

  Somehow our clothes come off, landing god knows where. When I am finally naked on top of him, I feel like I will explode with lust and love.

  “Tyler,” I murmur. “What do you want?” I am not about to take anything for granted, and I am rewarded for my query with a flash a pure lust across his golden tanned face. I can’t help but bring my hands up to run through the waves of his blond hair. He arches into my touch, baring his neck to me, and I lean down to suck the skin of his neck.

  “Roger,” he moans, “I want…” His voice trails off as I apply more suction to his beautiful skin, not so subtly trying to raise a hickey there. His body, so warm and petite, soft but lithely muscled, shifts beneath me, our dicks sliding together, the friction almost overwhelming.

  He cries out and snakes his arms around my neck, pulling me tighter into him. My hands explore his chest, pinching a nipple, which elicits the most delightful sound of need I have ever heard.

  “I want,” he breathes into my ear, “you to turn me over and take me from behind. I want to feel your strong body pressing me into the mattress, surrounding me, feeling me, owning me. Because you already own my heart.”

  I almost tear up because it’s the most romantic thing anyone has every said to me, and it happens in the moment I am the most turned on in my life. Groaning, I give my hickey one last suck, and I raise myself to my knees. He looks beautiful as he lies naked in my bed. As I finally look at the body I have wanted to worship for what seems like an age, he starts to laugh softly.

  “What?” I murmur, wanting in on the joke.

  He smiles. “I bought condoms and lube, but I forgot them on the couch.” He laughs again. “I panicked when you came in and stuffed them under the afghan.”

  Chucking, I rise from the bed and retrieve the items. Kneeling on the bed again, I offer him my hand and pull him up to sitting. “That was my grandmother’s afghan, you know. But knowing her sense of humor, I am sure she would have appreciated your usage of it.”

  Tyler scrambles to his knees and kisses my passionately, gripping my hair and tugging my naked body against his. Pulling back, his nips at my lips. “Stop talking and make me come.”

  Smirking, I reply, “Your wish is my command.”

  Pulling arms from around me, I force him to turn around on the bed. “On your knees.”

  A shiver runs through him at the dominance in my tone. “Yes.”

  When Tyler has arranged himself with his arms crossed on the pillow, his head resting against them, but turned so he can see me, I tug his slender hips into the position I want him, pushing his legs further apart with my knees. Cracking open the bottle of the lube, I pour it generously in my right hand, watching Tyler watch me as I rub my finger together. Touching my lubed fingers to his hole, I grasp his hip with my free hand. He moans and bites his lip, but his eyes never leave mine. As my fingers massage his hole and eventually slip inside, one, two, then three, Tyler watches me. He moans occasionally, and his needs seems to rise with every flick of my wrist or twist of my fingers.

  “Roger,” he finally murmurs, “I’m ready.”

  Smiling, I lean forward to kiss him softly. Pulling back, I tear open a condom and roll it down my length, stroking the excess lube on my fingers over it.

  Tyler bites his lip and moans as I lean over him, guiding my cock to his waiting entrance. Slowly I push inside. Luckily, I’ve loosened him enough that I slide in without much resistance, his muscles giving way and opening for me. I still when I’m fully buried inside of him. Leaning forward over his back, I kiss his neck until he pushes back against me and demands that I move.

  We develop a steady rhythm, and it feels like no first time I have had before. Matching each other, the intensity builds until he’s crying out beneath me. Moving my hand to cup his throat and pull his head back for a kiss, I plunge harder into him. His gasps and moans of pleasure arouse me further. Slipping my other hand from his hip to his groin, I grasp his cock and begin pumping him. Pulling him up to kneeling, I continue jerking him off as I grind my hips against his beautiful ass. Tyler gasps and comes in my hands, his cock throbbing as the warm liquid spills down my closed fist. With my other hand, I pull him flush against me and stop moving. I hold myself there, my dick lodged against his prostate.

  “Umm,” he moans, but the sound is higher, “um, oh my god.” He throws his head back against my shoulder, and I can feel his renewed clenching around my dick. Tyler screams, his dick pulsing again though it has no cum left to give, and I shove him to the mattress and plunge hard into him again. A few strokes later, and I come, sinking my teeth into his shoulder. I feel like I’m claiming him like an animal with its mate. The pleasure pulses through me and I luxuriated in the little moans and high-pitched noises Tyler makes beneath me.

  “I love you, Tyler Twink,” I whisper into his ear. He turns his head so we can kiss, then he whispers “I love my Roger Bear.”

  Despite my semi-hard state, I start thrusting softly into him.

  Tyler gasps. “You’re definitely not a rabbit.”

  “No?”

  “Maybe in frequency,” he chuckles, and looks over his shoulder at me, “but in stamina and protection, you are all bear, my teddy bear.”

  Thrusting one more time, I feel him shiver. I kiss his neck and shoulders, coming back finally to his lips, where I give him my love as we stare into each other’s eyes.

  Roger’s dick is a thing of beauty. Even now, relaxed in sleep just like the rest of the man himself, his cock cannot be classified as anything other than a glorious monster. And I feel deliciously sore from how well we used it last night. When I awoke a few moments ago, I found Roger sprawled out nude, legs and arms akimbo in the middle of the bed. Luckily for both of us, I’m somewhere in the range of “average-sized for a twink,” and this bed is a king sized one. I cannot stop myself from rolling over onto my side and scooting closer to him. When my leg brushes his thigh, a hand clamps down on my arm and pulls me roughly into his embrace. Looking up into his face, I expect to see his laughing eyes wide open, but Roger appears to be fast asleep as he snuggles me into his chest and nudges his nose into the crook of my neck. He has wrapped himself around me and I have no complaints about that.

  “Tyler,” he breathes out against my skin, raising goosebumps along my entire flesh and waking up at least one very interested party, my cock. Lucky me, my hand has ended up on his thigh and I brush my fingers across it, searching out that glorious monster with my fingertips. Ahh, there it is. Roger’s skin is smooth and warm to the touch, so very warm. Trailing my fingers up and down his length, which begins to stiffen at first contact, I press feather light caresses against his growing erection. My wandering digits elicit a moan from Roger, then a breathy sigh. I’m not sure if he is awake yet, so I press kisses against his chest, which he pulled me against mere moments ago. Ahh, there is the nipple. I lick at it, flicking my tongue across the erect bud as I continue my light, barely-there caresses against his length, which just keeps growing. Smiling happily against his chest, I flick his nipple one more time before latching my mouth over it and nipping at it. Now that incites an even better reaction as I feel more than hear a rumble in his chest.

  “Tyler,” he moans, and I know he is awake now. Since I have his attention, I suck on his nipple harder and then bite down again with a little more force than the last time. Roger makes a delightful noise, almost a moan, but not quite a squeak, a sound filled with longing and need.

  “Tyler,” h
e calls my name again and my desire and need skyrocket into the stratosphere. Leaving his nipple after one final tweak with my teeth, I skim both hands up to the center of his chest and push. Since Roger is so much larger than me and, more importantly, because I know I am safe, I push him with enough force to move him back an inch. Raising my head to look him in his hazel eyes, I smile and whisper, “On your back, Roger. There are some aspects of your physique I did not properly examine last night. I am making up for that now.”

  Love and need shine brightly in his eyes; his grin is relaxed and oh, so wicked. “You don’t say. Well then, Mr. Tyler, please continue your examination. I do hope you find all equipment to be satisfactory for your needs.” He allows me to push him onto his back, and I rise up onto my knees beside him before I climb over one muscular thigh to kneel between his legs. I lean over him, tracing the muscles from his belly, up this chest, along his neck with my fingertips, my hands finally resting with his face in my cupped hands. Leaning further into him, I kiss him gently, almost reverently. Then I nudge his chin aside with my nose as my hands trail back down to his chest to play with his nipples as I do my best to raise a hickey on the honey hued flesh of his neck. That elicits a delicious whine from the throat of my teddy bear. I alternate between running my fingers through his coarse auburn chest hair and rolling his nipples between my fingertips. Roger is making the most delightful sounds of need and lust, and I finally feel his hands against my skin as he gently grasps my hips.

  “Tyler,” my name drops from his lips with so much want that I raise my lips from their glorious task on the skin of his neck to kiss a trail over his jaw to his mouth. When our lips meet, the moment feels suspended as my heart thumps hard with my love for him. Now it is my turn to moan as Roger sweeps his tongue into my mouth, kissing me ravenously as his grip tightens on my hips.